Clueless First-year Looking for Advice

[CureMyMEDness]

---

Members don't see this ad.

(Sorry, it's a bit long and personal but your help would mean a lot!)

I'm an 18yo girl and I'll officially start my first year as an undergrad med student in two weeks. It's all very surreal and all my dreams seemed to come true while I feel very confused about what life ahead of me will be like.

I've been raised in a "greenhouse" - sheltered by a protective family. Although I've been reading news, volunteering at community centres and shadowing surgeons at public hospitals to try to understand the lives of others, people still feel that I'm just an unworldly, ingenuous dollface with too much empathy. I desperately want to be a good doctor in the future who can at least give people the feeling that I'm worldly so that they can trust me with their problems. I wish I knew how...

I'm also clueless about relationships. My parents are on the permissive side. They didn't want me to start dating in high school for a good reason so I turned down all love proposals. I focused on studying and being a counsellor for my friends. I definitely enjoyed that but now I'm finally free to start a relationship at my will. I really wonder what dating would be like in med school. Will it be too overwhelming since med school alone is crazy enough? Is it tough to balance study and relationships simultaneously?

Would anyone with or without similar experience be so kind as to offer your anecdotes or advice on studying, time management and relationships in med school?

Thank you for reading about my problems. Wish you kind souls a wonderful day 😉

 

[ooh a bean]

Given that you're 18, I would hold off on dating until second year just so you can establish a healthy study schedule, then go all at it once you've done that.

 

[stickgirl390]

See if your school offers counseling to their medical students. This can help you with both your studies and relationship concerns. Almost everyone in medical school at some point sees a counselor, they’re very helpful!

 

[OrthoTraumaMD]

I’m confused. There’s no such thing as an “undergrad med student.” You’re either a premed (college student who wants to go to med school), or a med student, which is someone who is in medical school. If you’re 18 and starting college then you don’t need to worry about what happens in med school yet. You have time to figure yourself out. Read the threads for premed that are geared toward people in your position— they are at the top of the site.

 

[vrazzles]

I’m confused. There’s no such thing as an “undergrad med student.” You’re either a premed (college student who wants to go to med school), or a med student, which is someone who is in medical school. If you’re 18 and starting college then you don’t need to worry about what happens in med school yet. You have time to figure yourself out. Read the threads for premed that are geared toward people in your position— they are at the top of the site.

Based on how OP spelled "community centres" and the fact that they are a med student at 18, I think that they're in the UK or another commonwealth nation. I've heard many people within those systems refer to medical school as "undergraduate medical education."


OP, most people on here are American and are accustomed to the American system of medical education.

You're 18 years old. I haven't met very many 18 year olds that are particularly worldly and exactly 0 whom I would trust to care for me medically. You have a lot of time to grow as a person and I believe that this will happen naturally during your studies and as you live your life. Don't stress about this.

The fact that you got into medical school suggests that you were an excellent high school student and that you have what it takes to succeed in medicine. You will learn more about yourself and how you best study going forward - everybody is different and advice that may apply to one person may not apply to another. Work hard and be sure to love yourself and your mental health - you can't care for others if you don't care for yourself.

I second the poster above who recommended to wait until the second year of med school before thinking about dating (not always the way it works out, I know). You may find that being in a cohort of like-minded people, romance will be easier to come by than currently expected. Hard work done together certainly builds comradery.

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

Based on how OP spelled "community centres" and the fact that they are a med student at 18, I think that they're in the UK or another commonwealth nation. I've heard many people within those systems refer to medical school as "undergraduate medical education."

OP, most people on here are American and are accustomed to the American system of medical education.

Funny enough, it's called undergraduate medical education here too (UME, as opposed to GME). Just no one calls it that in real life because it's weird and confusing given our system.

 

[takeurmeds02]

I've heard many people within those systems refer to medical school as "undergraduate medical education."

yea they do that here but we're not called "undergraduate medical students" because there are no "graduate medical students".