So I was runnin' a locums gig for several weeks in a small Southern town many moons ago where everybody and their momma invites ya to attend their church--Baptists under every rock if ya like. One evening get a call from the OB nurses station for stat C-section--for FHR of "ZERO"-- exact words. I rush on in expecting the worse. Arrive in 10 minutes and mother is reading the phuckin' paper(FHRs were normal and always were). Ask the nurse what's goin' on and she tells me the OB doc told her to tell me that so that I wouldn't lollygag around and show up an hour later. We do the c-section in an unhurried manner and he joked about the "FHR of Zero" --"sure got your a$$ here quick, didn't it Zip?" I acted like it didn't phase me at all. Little did this priick know that he phucked with the wrong person. So I got 3 addresses with phone #s: His office, his home and the hospital itself. This was before the internet and the PC took off. I then got him hooked up to a shiit load of gay and straight porn mailing lists that literally breaks the back of the mailman delivering it to the 3 addresses. Dude received boxes and boxes of all kinds of porn for months on end--magazines, flyers, promos, catalogs,etc. Got porn advertisers callin' all 3 #s too. It becomes the talk of the hospital for many months after my gig is up. Revenge was sweeet! ----Regards, ----Zip
