The Fear of Discrimination in LGBT Healthcare | Institute for Public Health | Washington University in St. Louis
https://www.lgbthealtheducation.org/wp-content/uploads/Improving-the-Health-of-LGBT-People.pdf
As a person who is a sexual minority and gender minority (woman), words do matter. Take a look at these articles. In the latter article, they mention how LGBTQ individuals look for subtle cues to determine if the environment is welcoming, and I can speak to that directly: when someone automatically assumes I'm straight in the medical field (and elsewhere), I tend to feel less safe to share automatically, and it's not conscious, necessarily, but a survival mechanism. I'm assessing how safe this person is and whether they assume because of a simple mistake or they assume because they don't think I
should be with someone of the same sex. There's a difference, and there are still medical practitioners who are biased/discriminate, as evidenced by my original post, when the male nurse purposely sent my fiancee out of the room and the rest of the nurses apologized for him because they knew he did it because he didn't like that she was my female partner.
Here's an analogy: you're a woman alone, walking on campus back to your dorm room at night from an evening class, and constantly assessing how safe you are as you walk, looking around at any males nearby to assess whether they present danger. For trans women, this is also a reality. For ethnic minorities, this might also be a reality. When you belong to a minority group, whether it be women, ethnic minorities, or sexual/gender minorities, survival means assessing risk in the environment at all times, especially when you feel vulnerable. So little "harmless" words like "hey sexy" etc. from men in these situations can be terrifying to women because it could indicate more than objectification and go into desire to exert power over them physically...because the reality is, men commit violence against women on college campuses and elsewhere.
That example is a little more extreme, but keeping in mind that minorities assess safety in their environments through subtle cues, that's why words (and inclusiveness) matter. I understand how hard it can be to grasp the concept of microaggressions and why they can be harmful, but keeping an open mind and putting myself in the shoes of others who also experience discrimination (to a greater extent than I) definitely helped me understand the experiences of others better and how damaging words can be.
