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Depressed NP...need some advice.

Discussion in 'Clinicians [ RN / NP / PA ]' started by roseglass6370, Sep 7, 2014.

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  1. roseglass6370

    roseglass6370 Are we there yet?
    5+ Year Member

    Jun 24, 2008
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    Other Health Professions Student
    Been awhile since I posted on here, but I need some advice. Preferably from some med students, MD's, or NP's that have some experience and can shed some light.

    I was a pre-med student all throughout undergrad. I was dead set on becoming a doctor and worked my butt off. I took the MCAT, filled out AMCA's almost all the way, and then got nervous. I was engaged and staring down my future and worried that I wouldn't be able to handle med school. I knew I wanted a lot out of life (family, hobbies, etc.) and didn't know if I was ready to commit to medical school with all of that. My family was shocked because I was so set on being a doctor for so long. No one could believe that I would change my mind at the last hour. Regardless, I decided to apply to a BS-MSN program that a few of my friends went through instead. I figured being an NP would give me the best of both worlds. I had prepped so hard academically for med school that getting into the program was easy. I got accepted.

    Now, here I am in my NP program and kind of hating my life. I'm learning how to be a nurse and can't help but feel like I'm settling. I'm not sure if it is because I am still learning the basics (how to put in a freaking catheter, etc.) or if I really should have gone to medical school.

    As a side note, my husband is freaking out that I'm starting to think med school. We haven't been married a year yet and he is worried he will never see me anymore if I get into med school and that it will entirely consume my life until I'm done with residency. Not sure what to say to him.

    My concerns are this:

    1) I don't want to uproot and move out of state for med school. Thankfully, I live in Ohio where there is no shortage of med schools.

    2) I am nervous about balancing my life while in med school. I do want kids and I want some semblance of a life when all is said and done. Residency is one of the main reasons, if not the main reason, I got hesitant about applying to begin with. My husband is nervous about this too.

    3) I am 25. Is it too late to commit to this whole deal and really reap the benefits of it?

    4) I'm gonna have to retake the MCAT. I was super sick the day I took it, did horribly, and should have voided it to begin with, but was stubborn. This isn't that big of a deal.

    My stats:

    Undergrad GPA - 3.78-ish
    Undergrad Science GPA - 3.55-ish
    Grad GPA - 4.0
    MCAT - gonna retake
    Clinical experience - I have worked as a nurse's aide for 7 years, shadowed 2 docs, in nursing school now, yada yada, I've got a crap ton of it
    I volunteered places.
    I did research.
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