Deteriorating social skills

[fastlane]

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I'm about done with my first year of medical school, and noticed that my social skills have deteriorated massively as this year has progressed. Before medical school, I worked in a setting where I was constantly speaking to clients and my social skills were highly dependent on my success. Now, I spend more time (than I ever have in my life) with the books, and less time (than I ever have) communicating with others. I feel more awkward, don't feel like I know what to talk about when I'm around others, and feel like more conversations fall flat. I feel like I have lost some of my wit and sense of humor.

Attributing factors:
1) I realized instead of going to class, I could download lectures at home and watch at 2.5x speed and save a bunch of time - thus I stopped going to class/socializing with classmates.
2) I realized I am much more efficient when I study on my own, thus I stopped studying with classmates and started scoring higher on my exams.

It sucks that the most effective study methods for me involve removing face-to-face social contact. I hope to gain some of it back this summer with family/friends. But the way it is going, my social skills will probably hit rock bottom right as I finish Step 1 next year and go into clinical rotations.

Has anybody else noticed this and found good ways to prevent loss of social skills/stay sharp? I tried searching but didn't come up with anything useful.

 

[Anastomoses]

I use SDN to keep my social skills sharp. I suggest you do the same.

 

[Serous Demilune]

I'm about done with my first year of medical school, and noticed that my social skills have deteriorated massively as this year has progressed. Before medical school, I worked in a setting where I was constantly speaking to clients and my social skills were highly dependent on my success. Now, I spend more time (than I ever have in my life) with the books, and less time (than I ever have) communicating with others. I feel more awkward, don't feel like I know what to talk about when I'm around others, and feel like more conversations fall flat. I feel like I have lost some of my wit and sense of humor.

Attributing factors:
1) I realized instead of going to class, I could download lectures at home and watch at 2.5x speed and save a bunch of time - thus I stopped going to class/socializing with classmates.
2) I realized I am much more efficient when I study on my own, thus I stopped studying with classmates and started scoring higher on my exams.

It sucks that the most effective study methods for me involve removing face-to-face social contact. I hope to gain some of it back this summer with family/friends. But the way it is going, my social skills will probably hit rock bottom right as I finish Step 1 next year and go into clinical rotations.

Has anybody else noticed this and found good ways to prevent loss of social skills/stay sharp? I tried searching but didn't come up with anything useful.

I have this exact problem, and you were able to put it much more clearly than I ever could. At least your writing skills are still up to par.

 

[Nidor]

.

 

[CoolWhipp]

preach

 

[CherryRedDracul]

Life in the fast lane ... surely makes you lose your mind.

 

[coffeesnob]

yes. you are not alone. i will make up for the loss in the summer. it's funny I was just thinking about this too.

 

[graviton]

Has anybody else noticed this

Nope, but than again I never had any social skills to begin with.

 

[DermViser]

I'm about done with my first year of medical school, and noticed that my social skills have deteriorated massively as this year has progressed. Before medical school, I worked in a setting where I was constantly speaking to clients and my social skills were highly dependent on my success. Now, I spend more time (than I ever have in my life) with the books, and less time (than I ever have) communicating with others. I feel more awkward, don't feel like I know what to talk about when I'm around others, and feel like more conversations fall flat. I feel like I have lost some of my wit and sense of humor.

Attributing factors:
1) I realized instead of going to class, I could download lectures at home and watch at 2.5x speed and save a bunch of time - thus I stopped going to class/socializing with classmates.
2) I realized I am much more efficient when I study on my own, thus I stopped studying with classmates and started scoring higher on my exams.

It sucks that the most effective study methods for me involve removing face-to-face social contact. I hope to gain some of it back this summer with family/friends. But the way it is going, my social skills will probably hit rock bottom right as I finish Step 1 next year and go into clinical rotations.

Has anybody else noticed this and found good ways to prevent loss of social skills/stay sharp? I tried searching but didn't come up with anything useful.

Excellent observation. For a set period of time, medical school does not reward social skills especially in the first 2 years. MS-1/MS-2 is the epitome of that.

 

[neusu]

Has anybody else noticed this and found good ways to prevent loss of social skills/stay sharp? I tried searching but didn't come up with anything useful.

Some of us never had social skills to begin with. So count yourself with your deteriorated social skills fortunate.

 

[DermViser]

Some of us never had social skills to begin with. So count yourself with your deteriorated social skills fortunate.

Also, in some specialties, good social skills aren't necessarily needed. The system thrives on rewarding aptitude, academic and standardized test achievement, much more than social skills.

 

[Rirruto]

I'm about done with my first year of medical school, and noticed that my social skills have deteriorated massively as this year has progressed. Before medical school, I worked in a setting where I was constantly speaking to clients and my social skills were highly dependent on my success. Now, I spend more time (than I ever have in my life) with the books, and less time (than I ever have) communicating with others. I feel more awkward, don't feel like I know what to talk about when I'm around others, and feel like more conversations fall flat. I feel like I have lost some of my wit and sense of humor.

Attributing factors:
1) I realized instead of going to class, I could download lectures at home and watch at 2.5x speed and save a bunch of time - thus I stopped going to class/socializing with classmates.
2) I realized I am much more efficient when I study on my own, thus I stopped studying with classmates and started scoring higher on my exams.

It sucks that the most effective study methods for me involve removing face-to-face social contact. I hope to gain some of it back this summer with family/friends. But the way it is going, my social skills will probably hit rock bottom right as I finish Step 1 next year and go into clinical rotations.

Has anybody else noticed this and found good ways to prevent loss of social skills/stay sharp? I tried searching but didn't come up with anything useful.

My social skills took a big hit during MSII as well. Thank goodness for mandatory PBL for maintaining my teamwork skills. Oh wait.

 

[HLxDrummer]

Do you guys notice you just can't speak or write things anymore? I say things out loud that either don't make sense or I mix up words lol Almost everything I do is on the computer and our OSCE was on paper.. my hand was cramping after the first patient.

 

[alicealicealice]

I'm about done with my first year of medical school, and noticed that my social skills have deteriorated massively as this year has progressed. Before medical school, I worked in a setting where I was constantly speaking to clients and my social skills were highly dependent on my success. Now, I spend more time (than I ever have in my life) with the books, and less time (than I ever have) communicating with others. I feel more awkward, don't feel like I know what to talk about when I'm around others, and feel like more conversations fall flat. I feel like I have lost some of my wit and sense of humor.

Attributing factors:
1) I realized instead of going to class, I could download lectures at home and watch at 2.5x speed and save a bunch of time - thus I stopped going to class/socializing with classmates.
2) I realized I am much more efficient when I study on my own, thus I stopped studying with classmates and started scoring higher on my exams.

It sucks that the most effective study methods for me involve removing face-to-face social contact. I hope to gain some of it back this summer with family/friends. But the way it is going, my social skills will probably hit rock bottom right as I finish Step 1 next year and go into clinical rotations.

Has anybody else noticed this and found good ways to prevent loss of social skills/stay sharp? I tried searching but didn't come up with anything useful.

yes. for a while there when I went out with people my age that were not in medicine and not life long friends, I felt more like an scientific observer on an anthropological field survey then a member of my generation.

 

[Brain Bucket]

Do you guys notice you just can't speak or write things anymore? I say things out loud that either don't make sense or I mix up words lol Almost everything I do is on the computer and our OSCE was on paper.. my hand was cramping after the first patient.

Yeah, a few of us find that we're losing vocabulary after 2 years of this crap.

 

[BobbyB]

Yeah, a few of us find that we're losing vocabulary after 2 years of this crap.

it doesn't get better

i forgot my aunt and cousin's names (srs)

 

[Psai]

yes. for a while there when I went out with people my age that were not in medicine and not life long friends, I felt more like an scientific observer on an anthropological field survey then a member of my generation.

Yeah the other day I was at the supermarket with my friend. I saw this fat girl with some dark, horizontal lines on her neck and I'm like that's some acanthosis nigricans.

 

[DermViser]

yes. for a while there when I went out with people my age that were not in medicine and not life long friends, I felt more like an scientific observer on an anthropological field survey then a member of my generation.

Medical school definitely ages you. No doubt about it. It's like 8 years in 4 years. Get's that way esp. after MS-3.

 

[Arkangeloid]

Last post before I get back to the books, but I would def say that med school is sending my social skills even deeper into the abyss. I actually told one of my MS-2 friend at a party I wouldn't mind "palpating those sacral dermatomes" of a petite woman in a black dress. He started laughing uncontrollably.

 

[fastlane]

Becoming a doctor is a very long process. You've got 4 years of medical school and at least 3 years of residency. During these years we spend ALLOT of time studying medicine. Might I suggest that you try to set some time apart for meeting up with/making friends?
It might lower your class score and cost you some Step 1 points in the shorter run. But in the long run, you can't completely sacrifice 7 years of your life and expect to be a healthy functioning person at the other end. Sure you'll get some more human contact when you start M3, but still, you're gone need some down time.
Furthermore, I strongly believe that not locking yourself up for 7 years will help you with showing empathy towards your patients.

So, my advice, give yourself a golden weekend or a night a week that you're not doing medicine, no matter how behind you are and no matter how much you should be reviewing those pesky pharmacology notes, use that night to go grab a beer. Also, try to work out at least 3 times a week (running doesn't take up much time, but it'll help you empty your mind and not over focus on medicine a little)

I still spend time talking on the phone/hanging out with my girlfriend and some close friends. Also I volunteer at a couple free clinics, which I love doing partly because I get to get out and communicate with patients, other students, and physicians. I don't know if spending another night a week grabbing a beer will make much of a cumulative difference, but it could help. Because of the amount of time we are required to spend studying, I guess there isn't really any way to spend time honing in social skills. That's one reason I can't wait for MS3, I would love to spend all my time interacting with others rather than secluded. I guess I will just have to tough it out until then. I do workout too, to keep myself in shape, but I do that by myself too, LOL! Thanks for the input.

 

[fastlane]

Also, in some specialties, good social skills aren't necessarily needed. The system thrives on rewarding aptitude, academic and standardized test achievement, much more than social skills.

Connecting with and healing patients makes life more rewarding. Wouldn't want to do any specialty where I don't interact with others.

 

[DermViser]

Connecting with and healing patients makes life more rewarding. Wouldn't want to do any specialty where I don't interact with others.

You're an MS-1 who has not done MS-3 rotations in fields such as OB-Gyn, Surgery, and IM and having to deal with a lot of non-medicine related BS. Come back after that and tell me if you feel the same way, when you no longer have the protection of the classroom as you do now.

Let me know then if you still love "Connecting with and healing patients" and you'll realize why certain fields are competitive (i.e. Radiology) and others are not. Your view of medicine is quite idealistic at this point.

 

[BobbyB]

You're an MS-1 who has not done MS-3 rotations in fields such as OB-Gyn, Surgery, and IM and having to deal with a lot of non-medicine related BS. Come back after that and tell me if you feel the same way, when you no longer have the protection of the classroom as you do now.

Let me know then if you still love "Connecting with and healing patients" and you'll realize why certain fields are competitive (i.e. Radiology) and others are not. Your view of medicine is quite idealistic at this point.

this x 1000

save that flowery BS for your patients.

 

[dyspareunia]

Connecting with and healing patients makes life more rewarding. Wouldn't want to do any specialty where I don't interact with others.

You sound like a premed.

 

[fastlane]

You're an MS-1 who has not done MS-3 rotations in fields such as OB-Gyn, Surgery, and IM and having to deal with a lot of non-medicine related BS. Come back after that and tell me if you feel the same way, when you no longer have the protection of the classroom as you do now.

Let me know then if you still love "Connecting with and healing patients" and you'll realize why certain fields are competitive (i.e. Radiology) and others are not. Your view of medicine is quite idealistic at this point.

You sound like a premed.

Hahaha, as I was typing that I was thinking how naive it sounded. But it's true for myself - thus far. I wouldn't waste my time going to free clinics and doing other things if I didn't personally find it rewarding. Life's short and our free time is even shorter. Don't really have an ulterior motive. That being said I do
recognize and don't deny that I have no idea what life is like waist deep as an M3 yet. Will cross that bridge when I get there

 

[DermViser]

Hahaha, as I was typing that I was thinking how naive it sounded. But it's true for myself - thus far. I wouldn't waste my time going to free clinics and doing other things if I didn't personally find it rewarding. Life's short and our free time is even shorter. Don't really have an ulterior motive. That being said I do
recognize and don't deny that I have no idea what life is like waist deep as an M3 yet. Will cross that bridge when I get there

Newsflash: MS-3 rotations, and the resident/attending evaluations it entails, are nothing like free clinics. Not by a long shot.

 

[fastlane]

Newsflash: MS-3 rotations, and the resident/attending evaluations it entails, are nothing like free clinics. Not by a long shot.

That's understandable. If it is anything like working a professional job - aka 90% managing how people perceive you, bsing confidence to act as if you know more than you do, and building rapport/getting along with those around you - it should be manageable, with whatever social skills I have left by then

 

[DermViser]

That's understandable. If it is anything like working a professional job - aka 90% managing how people perceive you, bsing confidence to act as if you know more than you do, and building rapport/getting along with those around you - it should be manageable, with whatever social skills I have left by then

It's a holistic package, all of that plus actual medical knowledge and competence. If you do what you're supposed to, you're at least guaranteed a "Pass".

 

[VisionaryTics]

this x 1000

save that flowery BS for your patients.

Newsflash: MS-3 rotations, and the resident/attending evaluations it entails, are nothing like free clinics. Not by a long shot.

I finished medical school, and hated the non-medicine related BS. Still, it was worth it for those times when you pull a patient out of the fire or send them home healthy after a big operation.

But, please, don't let me interrupt your ceremonial bashing of clinical medicine.

 

[DermViser]

I finished medical school, and hated the non-medicine related BS. Still, it was worth it for those times when you pull a patient out of the fire or send them home healthy after a big operation.

But, please, don't let me interrupt your ceremonial bashing of clinical medicine.

Yes, as an MS-3, I'm sure you yourself "pulled a patient out of the fire" or "sent them home healthy after a big operation". Sorry but your residents did the actual work and you got to bask in the glory of "feeling" like you did something. Speak again half way during internship you start this July.

Edit: Oh, but wait you're doing ENT a surgically focused, lifestyle-oriented specialty in which you're relatively shielded from the non-medicine related BS.

 

[BobbyB]

I finished medical school, and hated the non-medicine related BS. Still, it was worth it for those times when you pull a patient out of the fire or send them home healthy after a big operation.

But, please, don't let me interrupt your ceremonial bashing of clinical medicine.

i'm not bashing clinical medicine. i'm bashing the medical equivalent of "live laugh love"

"omg, like, i can't believe i'm about to say this, but like today was like the WORST day and i was like super super tired, but when i saw my patient's smile i like totally remembered why i do this and what is God's purpose for my life. that patient's smile is all the payment i'll ever need. like this if you agree."

 

[CherryRedDracul]

Do you guys notice you just can't speak or write things anymore? I say things out loud that either don't make sense or I mix up words lol Almost everything I do is on the computer and our OSCE was on paper.. my hand was cramping after the first patient.

I thought I was the only one. I'm also developing dysgraphia where I often write letters out of order. Annotating First Aid in pen has been a nightmare.

 

[Double A]

do you really feel like your social skills are something you can lose or something you need to work on at this point? you've made it this far interacting with other humans im sure you'll be fine. if you want to get out more thats one thing, but doing it to keep your social skills sharp is something that i doubt you need to do. try not to think about it so much, you're not being graded

 

[dyspareunia]

do you really feel like your social skills are something you can lose or something you need to work on at this point? you've made it this far interacting with other humans im sure you'll be fine. if you want to get out more thats one thing, but doing it to keep your social skills sharp is something that i doubt you need to do. try not to think about it so much, you're not being graded

You must not be a real med student.

 

[VisionaryTics]

Yes, as an MS-3, I'm sure you yourself "pulled a patient out of the fire" or "sent them home healthy after a big operation".

Well, of course not. I phrased that poorly. But I still felt I became invested enough in some patients that it was gratifying see them do well. If you didn't have that experience, I'm sorry.

Sorry but your residents did the actual work and you got to bask in the glory of "feeling" like you did something.

I don't think anyone who finishes medical school in the 21st century "feels like we did something" or basks in any glory. We play pretend doctor and get graded. We don't really take care of patients.

Speak again half way during internship you start this July.

We'll see. But I think I would turn out to be a pretty ****ty human being if I didn't take some pleasure in my patients doing well.

Edit: Oh, but wait you're doing ENT a surgically focused, lifestyle-oriented specialty in which you're relatively shielded from the non-medicine related BS.

Yeah. I like good outcomes and like being directly involved in bringing them about. Hence, I applied to a surgical specialty that I thought matched my interests. That wasn't my point. My point was that there are still moments in medicine that are rewarding. They are scarce as a student because we don't do much, but they still exist.

In fact, the reason I applied to ENT was not to run away from clinical medicine into a "lifestyle specialty", but rather because it had a lot of pretty rewarding moments for a surgical specialty -- stapes/cochlear implants giving people their hearing back, FESS allowing somebody to breathe, giving a cancer patient a decent shot at a good quality of life.

I read your posts and am frustrated because you paint everything with this all-pervasive brush of cynicism. I look at some of the experiences that we have in common (medical school, rotations like gen surg and IM that you have been vocal about), and I find that we each took away very different perspectives.

 

[DermViser]

Well, of course not. I phrased that poorly. But I still felt I became invested enough in some patients that it was gratifying see them do well. If you didn't have that experience, I'm sorry.

I don't think anyone who finishes medical school in the 21st century "feels like we did something" or basks in any glory. We play pretend doctor and get graded. We don't really take care of patients.

We'll see. But I think I would turn out to be a pretty ****** human being if I didn't take some pleasure in my patients doing well.

Yeah. I like good outcomes and want to minimize the BS (which I think is wishful thinking). That wasn't my point. My point was that there are still moments in medicine that are rewarding. They are scarce as a student because we don't do much, but they still exist.

I read your posts and am frustrated because you paint everything with this all-pervasive brush of cynicism. I look at some of the experiences that we have in common (medical school, rotations like gen surg and IM that you have been vocal about), and I find that we each took away very different perspectives.

No human being is not satisfied when a patient gets better. But to make it out as if that's what MS-3 entirely is, is ridiculous, esp. with the only fields you're allowed to be exposed to MS-3 are. Obviously you realized this, as you pursued a field that has minimum BS that is common with MS-3 fields, hence why you chose ENT, and I chose Derm, which minimizes this BS to a great extent. But to take my comment and peg it as "ceremonial bashing of clinical medicine," is ridiculous, when the non-medicine BS is what greatly detracts from it in the first place.

 

[Psai]

Well, of course not. I phrased that poorly. But I still felt I became invested enough in some patients that it was gratifying see them do well. If you didn't have that experience, I'm sorry.



I don't think anyone who finishes medical school in the 21st century "feels like we did something" or basks in any glory. We play pretend doctor and get graded. We don't really take care of patients.



We'll see. But I think I would turn out to be a pretty ****** human being if I didn't take some pleasure in my patients doing well.



Yeah. I like good outcomes and like being directly involved in bringing them about. Hence, I applied to a surgical specialty that I thought matched my interests. That wasn't my point. My point was that there are still moments in medicine that are rewarding. They are scarce as a student because we don't do much, but they still exist.

In fact, the reason I applied to ENT was not to run away from clinical medicine into a "lifestyle specialty", but rather because it had a lot of pretty rewarding moments for a surgical specialty -- stapes/cochlear implants giving people their hearing back, FESS allowing somebody to breathe, giving a cancer patient a decent shot at a good quality of life.

I read your posts and am frustrated because you paint everything with this all-pervasive brush of cynicism. I look at some of the experiences that we have in common (medical school, rotations like gen surg and IM that you have been vocal about), and I find that we each took away very different perspectives.

Hey props man I've been really impressed by the ENT residents that I've interacted with so far and it's such a hard field to get into. Hope you do well.

 

[ECkayak]

i'm not bashing clinical medicine. i'm bashing the medical equivalent of "live laugh love"

"omg, like, i can't believe i'm about to say this, but like today was like the WORST day and i was like super super tired, but when i saw my patient's smile i like totally remembered why i do this and what is God's purpose for my life. that patient's smile is all the payment i'll ever need. like this if you agree."

Just throwing this out there...I'm going into ob/gyn (as a guy) specifically because the satisfied and happy people make the long hours and BS worth it to me. Live, laugh, love actually describes me pretty good.

 

[BobbyB]

Just throwing this out there...I'm going into ob/gyn (as a guy) specifically because the satisfied and happy people make the long hours and BS worth it to me. Live, laugh, love actually describes me pretty good.

it describes everyone

 

[username456789]

it describes everyone

It describes the AIM profile contents of every female in her late teens/early 20s from the late 90s/early 2000s. I guess nowadays it's usually just a Live/Laugh/Love picture collage full of her and her besties.

 

[Brain Bucket]

"ECkayak, post: 15196082, member: 494973"]Just throwing this out there...I'm going into ob/gyn (as a guy) specifically because the satisfied and happy people make the long hours and BS worth it to me. Live, laugh, love actually describes me pretty good.

The only happy male OB's I've met are actually quite 'pretty'. I dunno about the whole 'satisfied and happy people' bit...people who're preggers and/or recently given birth usually don't seem to be the most stable lot.

On an unrelated note, and in keeping with the spirit of the thread:

 

[ECkayak]

it describes everyone

Not you, judging from the message I quoted you.

 

[coffeesnob]

The only happy male OB's I've met are actually quite 'pretty'. I dunno about the whole 'satisfied and happy people' bit...people who're preggers and/or recently given birth usually don't seem to be the most stable lot.

On an unrelated note, and in keeping with the spirit of the thread:
View attachment 180939

Which movie is the GIF from? That is hilarious.

 

[Anastomoses]

On an unrelated note, and in keeping with the spirit of the thread:
View attachment 180939

In addition to the Like button, I would now like a Wtf? button instituted.

 

[Brain Bucket]

Which movie is the GIF from? That is hilarious.

 

[KnuxNole]

The only happy male OB's I've met are actually quite 'pretty'. I dunno about the whole 'satisfied and happy people' bit...people who're preggers and/or recently given birth usually don't seem to be the most stable lot.

On an unrelated note, and in keeping with the spirit of the thread:
View attachment 180939

Well, when you're beautiful, you're always happy 😀

 

[BobbyB]

Not you, judging from the message I quoted you.

don't be petty

live
laugh
love

 

[PL198]

Yeah I'm a miserable person who hates living/laughing/loving, which is why I dream to go into rads. Or just because I don't want to deal with people's BS.

 

[DermViser]

Yeah I'm a miserable person who hates living/laughing/loving, which is why I dream to go into rads. Or just because I don't want to deal with people's BS.

To be fair those in Rads tend to be the type to live/laugh/love.

 

[coffeesnob]

on a related note, what are "not-so-competitive" specialties with little to moderate patient contact? all i can think of is pathology.