Do anyone's parents actually help pay for medical school?

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I know most scholarships take into account parental income, so I'm just curious if anyone's parents actually help pay? I know this can vary by culture, but most of my friends with american-born parents said their parents aren't helping, even if they make way too much for the student to qualify for anything.

My parents make north of 200 but aren't giving me a dime, but they did help with a few application expenses so I can't complain.

I know people with wealthy parents have had so many advantages that it probably so evens out, but sometimes I wish the system didn't weigh parental income quite so much.
 
Reader88 said:
I know most scholarships take into account parental income, so I'm just curious if anyone's parents actually help pay? I know this can vary by culture, but most of my friends with american-born parents said their parents aren't helping, even if they make way too much for the student to qualify for anything.

My parents make north of 200 but aren't giving me a dime, but they did help with a few application expenses so I can't complain.

I know people with wealthy parents have had so many advantages that it probably so evens out, but sometimes I wish the system didn't weigh parental income quite so much.
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Yes
 
I'm also American born and I financed all of my undergrad education, med school app costs, and will take out necessary loans for med school. I personally don't feel comfortable taking money from my parents after I moved out (I didn't live at home for UG). In my eyes they have done more than enough already than for me and I wouldn't want to continue to take finances away from them.

I think it is a personal decision and I don't think one way is better than another way. But I personally do take pride in knowing I've done it myself.

Parental income is taken into account because if someone called their parents and said "Hey I need $300 or they're going to shut off my electricity." someone from a well off family is much more likely to get it.
 
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I doubt a wealthy parent will let their child go hungry, lack any means of transportation, possibly face homelessness, or take on a strenuous fast-food job just to pay rent. So in that sense, even if they don't make a check specifically to pay for any academic fee (which you seem to think solely constitutes helping), they are still doing a lot more than a parent who is at the poverty level. I'll be taking on loans because it is hard for us to even afford our university and housing at an in-state price with a discount.
 
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I can vouch for the fact that a number of my classmates are being financed (in part or whole) by their parents. A lot of them it seems to be a mix of loans/parental support - for example, some people are taking out loans for tuition, but their parents are paying their living expenses, or vice versa.
 
It’s fairly common where I’m front for either parents to foot as much of the bill as they can or, they make their children pay for everything from the moment they hit 18.
 
Grew up in a pretty average household (squarely middle class) and my parents helped. I paid for first year myself (previously had a job, so out-of-pocket). Parents lent me tuition for last 3 years and I paid for living expenses. It was what my parents were able to afford and kept me to under 50k in fed loans. Thought by everyone was that we'd rather I owe them and not have to pay interest and save 50K+ in the long run than have to pay back the feds at a 6% or more interest rate. I hope to fully pay them back within my first 3 years as an attending and will absolutely pay them back fully within 5 years of being an attending.
 
I grew up in the country, my brother was the first to attend college and I the first for grad school. Paid my own way through UG and Med school. Scholarships and jobs for UG, loans for med school. Parents did not help but for some spending money here and there
Wife and I were married as med students, paid our own way. We paid for my sons entire med school so he would not have any debt and would not have to take the first crappy job offered because his loans came due. Times are different now. Every situation is different.
 
My parents helped during undergrad, but once I moved out and joined the Navy, I became totally financially independent and have done everything else on my own. Of course, I haven’t actually had to pay for tuition because the military pays for it, but I’m covering the rest of the COA myself (and my wife).
 
Many parents, even in relatively comfortable positions, need to save for their other children's high school and college education, their own upcoming retirements, their parents' health and living arrangements, make necessary investments in their homes, etc. Paying for medical school, especially at the high rates that exist now, is not always possible. Many of those who raised these young adults about to start medical school have already paid for 3 yrs preschool, 12yrs HS, 4 yrs college = 19 years. In places like Boston and NYC, private school tuitions are about 20-50K or more per year EACH year, EACH kid, starting in preschool. The millionaire parents will be fine paying, but the other parents are now saying uncle when it comes to medical school. I know my father did when I went to medical school. And that is ok. Students with comfortable parents will always have a safety net, but many students with "comfortable" parents will be taking out a lot of loans.
 
DPTinthemaking15 said:
My best friend is getting his entire school paid for + COL. After he finishes, his parents are purchasing a home for him. On the bright side, he is extremely grateful and not a (hateful) spoiled brat :laugh:
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Same with a friend of mine.


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DPTinthemaking15 said:
My best friend is getting his entire school paid for + COL. After he finishes, his parents are purchasing a home for him. On the bright side, he is extremely grateful and not a (hateful) spoiled brat :laugh:
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That takes the fun out of being an independent adult. I can understand med school but a home also?
 
Sunbodi said:
That takes the fun out of being an independent adult. I can understand med school but a home also?
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You know what really takes the fun out of being an independent adult? Massive debt.
 
My grandmother is 91 and keeps insisting to pay for my school so I don't "Burn the candle at both ends" having to work as she always tells me, but I don't like accepting help. Been on my own since I was 17. Being independent makes a man out of you. That being said, if my children were doing something as important as med school, I would help them all that I could. Otherwise, I'm kicking their ass out of the house at 18 and they're making it on their own.
 
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OrthoTraumaMD said:
Same with a friend of mine.


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I want to be jealous, but I’m glad some families worked their tales off for their kids.

Sunbodi said:
That takes the fun out of being an independent adult. I can understand med school but a home also?
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His family promised him a home post-college as a graduation gift. They didn’t expect him to become a doctor, but they stuck to their guns. If it helps, our state is extremely low cost of living, and a decent home doesn’t cost too much.
 
DPTinthemaking15 said:
I want to be jealous, but I’m glad some families worked their tales off for their kids.



His family promised him a home post-college as a graduation gift. They didn’t expect him to become a doctor, but they stuck to their guns. If it helps, our state is extremely low cost of living, and a decent home doesn’t cost too much.
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That’s the American dream— we work out butt off so our kids can have it easier than us. What else are we supposed to do if not make our children’s lives better?


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I think a lot of parents help their kids with college and/or med school. That's why you hear parents talking about "saving up for their kids' college fund" all the time, at least where I'm from. I know plenty of friends in college whose parents are footing some or all of the bill for their education. Some plan to continue doing so for med school.

RNtoMD87 said:
I agree but disagree. I don't want my children to have an easier life. I want them to have a better life. I want them to have a hard, productive life so they appreciate it, but I want them to achieve far more than I have.
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I get what you're saying, but "easier" and "better" often go hand in hand. If you compare our generation with our grandparents' or great grandparents' generation, our quality of life is better largely because we have it easier than they did. I would bet that a person with 0 debt will be better off than that same person with 200K student loan debt.

If parents are financially able to assist their child in medical school, I don't see many logical reasons why they shouldn't. IMO allowing your kid to take on more debt won't really teach them anything valuable. Maybe this is just me, but I don't think I would appreciate my education more if I took out loans for it compared to if my parents paid for it.
 
I'm sure my father would have done the same regarding debt. I was fortunate to buy all of my vehicles with cash until my last one, and have had GI Bill and money that I've earned to pay for school, but if he were alive I'm sure he would insist on helping me with med school to reduce debt. My family sees debt as a mortal sin. My aunt and uncle both have Psychology PhDs, and when I mentioned I was planning on taking out some loans for med school, you could see the disappointment on their faces. They told me that they paid for school without student loans, paying as they went. (They also judged me for buying new clothes rather than shopping at goodwill even though I shop at target, lol).
 
Man Bear Pig said:
I think a lot of parents help their kids with college and/or med school. That's why you hear parents talking about "saving up for their kids' college fund" all the time, at least where I'm from. I know plenty of friends in college whose parents are footing some or all of the bill for their education. Some plan to continue doing so for med school.



I get what you're saying, but "easier" and "better" often go hand in hand. If you compare our generation with our grandparents' or great grandparents' generation, our quality of life is better largely because we have it easier than they did. I would bet that a person with 0 debt will be better off than that same person with 200K student loan debt.

If parents are financially able to assist their child in medical school, I don't see many logical reasons why they shouldn't. IMO allowing your kid to take on more debt won't really teach them anything valuable. Maybe this is just me, but I don't think I would appreciate my education more if I took out loans for it compared to if my parents paid for it.
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This. Saying your kids will be better off if they have to take responsibility for their education and make their own way is extremely short sighted in an age when students are taking on crushing debt just to start at the bottom, the likes of which has not been seen before.
 
My school will be paid for and my family will help me to get a house and rent it out during medical school.

I don’t think this made me any less of a man. I was always taught that to get something in life you have to work your ass off. It’s just in my culture your family is an extension of yourself and you’ll give them anything in your means. I know that with no debt I’ll be able to help my family and kids out whenever they need it.

I do agree there needs to be important lessons so that you don’t just take everything for granted. Thankfully my dad did a very good job with that.
 
I have two friends with parents that paid for their tuition and bought houses near the school for them. Both of them aren't even interested in medicine and one is repeating a year. The other one crams everything and thought about quitting several times and doesn't generally care about medicine. I have a third friend who's barely passing classes(goofs off) yet he lives in almost 2k/month condo by school paid by his parents(+tuition of course).
 
RNtoMD87 said:
They told me that they paid for school without student loans, paying as they went.
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You should show them an inflation calculator. It is essentially impossible to do that now for the average student.
 
Oh they understand, its just their mentality. My father was the same way. He paid for a 300,000$ farm on an xray technicians salary (40,000 a year when he retired) cash, and paid cash for his vehicles as well. But we almost never went out to eat, and all of our food came from what we grew/raised/hunted except for sugar, flour etc and we didn't really have any luxuries. In my first home (that he built with his father) we only had a single light bulb hanging from the main room, a stove, and a washing machine. We hung out clothes out on the line and my dad loved to brag about our low electricity bill. I think it was like 10 dollars. After that we lived in a fleetwood homes 1985 trailer until 2005 when he bought the farmland. My father was the kind of person who saved all the plastic silverware/ketchup packets from restaurants on the rare occasions we did get fast food, and made rope from the feed sack strings he saved from goat and chicken feed.

I wish I could live that cheap, but I cant no matter how hard I try. Old folks sure had a knack for that.
 
Reader88 said:
I know most scholarships take into account parental income, so I'm just curious if anyone's parents actually help pay? I know this can vary by culture, but most of my friends with american-born parents said their parents aren't helping, even if they make way too much for the student to qualify for anything.

My parents make north of 200 but aren't giving me a dime, but they did help with a few application expenses so I can't complain.

I know people with wealthy parents have had so many advantages that it probably so evens out, but sometimes I wish the system didn't weigh parental income quite so much.
Click to expand...

Yea it’s unfortunate that there’s not more support for people who’s family can’t/won’t support them.

I’m super fortunate to have had my parents support me through college and med school. But every family has different priorities. I’m just lucky my goals match up with my parents view of education spending.

I would say about a quarter of my class has parents (often physicians) footing some or all of the bill.
 
Matthew9Thirtyfive said:
You know what really takes the fun out of being an independent adult? Massive debt.
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If a kid comes fresh out of medical school with 0 debt due to parent's help and they're making an average salary in residency and a high salary after residency they should not need more of mommy and daddy's money to pay for a house.

Buying a house is a symbol of independence and adulthood. If a person can't do at least that after having everything prior paid for, they are being spoon fed their entire life.
 
Sunbodi said:
If a kid comes fresh out of medical school with 0 debt due to parent's help and they're making an average salary in residency and a high salary after residency they should not need more of mommy and daddy's money to pay for a house.

Buying a house is a symbol of independence and adulthood. If a person can't do at least that after having everything prior paid for then they are being spoon fed their entire life.
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The average resident makes less than I do as an E-6 in the military, and I would have to take out a mortgage to buy a house. Debt is debt. There is no magical symbol of being independent, and being independent doesn’t mean you can’t accept generosity from other people.

Maybe it’s because I’m already a financially independent adult with a family, but if my parents suddenly offered to buy me a house, I would accept it in a heart beat as long as it wouldn’t put them under any financial stress. Receiving generosity with grace is a symbol of maturity.
 
Matthew9Thirtyfive said:
The average resident makes less than I do as an E-6 in the military, and I would have to take out a mortgage to buy a house. Debt is debt. There is no magical symbol of being independent, and being independent doesn’t mean you can’t accept generosity from other people.

Maybe it’s because I’m already a financially independent adult with a family, but if my parents suddenly offered to buy me a house, I would accept it in a heart beat as long as it wouldn’t put them under any financial stress. Receiving generosity with grace is a symbol of maturity.
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I just don't categorize a $300k house with $2000 monthly payments as massive debt with a $50-$60k salary and a projected $150+k salary a couple years out.

Part of working is making an ends meet. If everything in life is provided for there is little incentive to work hard enough until you draw sweat. Life would be miserable in my eyes with little to no stress. But that's just me.
 
Sunbodi said:
I just don't categorize a $300k house with $2000 monthly payments as massive debt with a $50-$60k salary and a projected $150+k salary a couple years out.

Part of working is making an ends meet. If everything in life is provided for there is little incentive to work hard enough until you draw sweat. Life would be miserable in my eyes with little to no stress. But that's just me.
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I don’t know you, but this seems like it was written by someone who has not been financially independent while providing for a spouse and kids, as it grossly underestimates the realities of paying a mortgage and raising a family on $50k a year. If you’re totally single with no responsibilities other than work and your bills, it’s possible. But for someone who wants to have a family, not having a mortgage is a Godsend.

And please don’t lecture me on what it means to work. I worked over 80 hours per week for years so that I could make ends meet and provide for my family while advancing my education so that I could go to medical school and ensure my kids never HAVE to do that. Anyone who glamorizes that has either never done it or is compensating for something.

Not trying to be rude, just keeping things in perspective.
 
DPTinthemaking15 said:
My best friend is getting his entire school paid for + COL. After he finishes, his parents are purchasing a home for him. On the bright side, he is extremely grateful and not a (hateful) spoiled brat :laugh:
Click to expand...
popopopop said:
I have two friends with parents that paid for their tuition and bought houses near the school for them. Both of them aren't even interested in medicine and one is repeating a year. The other one crams everything and thought about quitting several times and doesn't generally care about medicine. I have a third friend who's barely passing classes(goofs off) yet he lives in almost 2k/month condo by school paid by his parents(+tuition of course).
Click to expand...


Yea believe it or not there’s a few of us out there that really lucked out yet are not totally aweful and spoiled....at least that’s what I keep telling myself.🙄

My parents bought the house I live in. They pay for my school, COL, car, the whole nine yards. That said I don’t have any illusions about how fortunate I am to have been given such a gift.

You just work hard, do the best with what you’re given, graciously accept help when it’s offered, and provide help for others when you can.
 
The Knife & Gun Club said:
Yea believe it or not there’s a few of us out there that really lucked out yet are not totally aweful and spoiled....at least that’s what I keep telling myself.🙄

My parents bought the house I live in. They pay for my school, COL, car, the whole nine yards. That said I don’t have any illusions about how fortunate I am to have been given such a gift.

You just work hard, do the best with what you’re given, graciously accept help when it’s offered, and provide help for others when you can.
Click to expand...

That’s right—-just pay it forward!


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The Knife & Gun Club said:
Yea believe it or not there’s a few of us out there that really lucked out yet are not totally aweful and spoiled....at least that’s what I keep telling myself.🙄

My parents bought the house I live in. They pay for my school, COL, car, the whole nine yards. That said I don’t have any illusions about how fortunate I am to have been given such a gift.

You just work hard, do the best with what you’re given, graciously accept help when it’s offered, and provide help for others when you can.
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Never said they weren't grateful, do people think you're ungrateful or something? They're really not materialistic at all and part of my small circle of friends. I just know their general attitude about being medicine.
 
No help for undergrad by my parents, and definitely no help for medical school. Definitely largely demographically driven. I am from a small working class/farming community, so money is not in surplus where I am from, but insane amounts of government and private loans sure are!
 
Sunbodi said:
I just don't categorize a $300k house with $2000 monthly payments as massive debt with a $50-$60k salary and a projected $150+k salary a couple years out.

Part of working is making an ends meet. If everything in life is provided for there is little incentive to work hard enough until you draw sweat. Life would be miserable in my eyes with little to no stress. But that's just me.
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I think that parents gifting a house to their kid could be awesome.

Debt ultimately slows down wealth building. Having a paid for house, no school loans means you can very easily accumulate wealth. Put that $2000 a month into a financial calculator and you will get millions of dollars after 30 years. That’s your utility cost of house payments.

I had student loans, I have a mortgage. If I never had those I’d probably have double my IRAs, and a large taxable account.

I don’t think there is a “right or wrong” way to parent this area ( I don’t think it’s wrong for parents to decide not to help if they can or to bless them).
 
Sunbodi said:
I just don't categorize a $300k house with $2000 monthly payments as massive debt with a $50-$60k salary and a projected $150+k salary a couple years out.

Part of working is making an ends meet. If everything in life is provided for there is little incentive to work hard enough until you draw sweat. Life would be miserable in my eyes with little to no stress. But that's just me.
Click to expand...

As someone who previously earned basically the salary you're describing, but is now headed towards large amounts of debt from med school, I think you're unnecessarily glamorizing this idea of debt and the importance of buying a home with your own money, especially on a resident's salary. Someone earning $50k is making about $4000 per month, pre-tax. After taxes (depending on the state), they're probably taking home about $3k/month. With your suggested mortgage payment, that leaves just over $1k for food, clothing, utilities, home repair, fun... that's not as much money as you think it is, especially if you have a family to support.

The significance of a first home shouldn't be the money you spend on it, it should be the life you build and the memories you make in it. So long as someone is humble and recognizes the significance of the gift their parents are giving them, I wouldn't blame them for accepting this kind of support. It's when someone takes it for granted and doesn't respect other people's differing financial situations that it becomes a problem.
 
In the US, there is a predominant individualistic mindset where anyone graduating from high school should leave home and become an independent adult. This expectation is placed early on as part of socialization into American culture, since individualism and independence form an essential foundation to capitalism, which is responsible for global success of the US.

However this mentality is too limited and restricted. Many cultures emphasize collaboration and large support groups through extended families and friends. Families from these cultures living in US view education to be a truly incredible gift and thus encourage their children to take it seriously because they know education is what will make them successful and productive in the long term. So for them, they have no issues paying for their children's education beyond high school until they're done and begin working/have settled down. In turn, their children are indebted to their families for serving as powerful support group throughout the education and growth process that they continue caring for them when they retire. The close family mindset is very strong in these cultures.

From a financial perspective, having families help pay for college or med school education is an extremely valuable blessing. This cannot be disputed and I'm shocked to see suggestions on here that students should turn down this offer and take out loans simply to conform to individualistic ideals. What they fail to realize is having zero debt is a huge deal and allows freedom to do whatever they want in the long term without being slammed by the crushing burden of growing debt.

The best approach is to just focus on your own situation and not care about what other people do and how they manage their finances.
 
Just my experience, parents run the gamut. My parents aren't well off and had no money saved for college, so I paid for undergrad and will be taking out more loans to pay for med school. I have a friend with a physician father who helped with undergrad but is making her pay for med school. I have other friends with wealthy parents who are paying for all of their kids' schooling.

I kind of grew up glorifying independence and always found it difficult to accept help. But I think there's something to be said for accepting good fortune and gifts with grace, and paying forward what you can. I plan on helping my own children as much as I'm able, just as my folks did for me. And the hope is to make things easier for them.
 
Personally it depends on my future kids. If they’re ambitious and go getters I’ll probably help pave the way for them. If they settle they’re on their own.
 
I grew up in a family just above the poverty line. We struggled a lot, and when I was in high school I knew that although my parents wanted to help me out, they just couldn't. I still had younger siblings they had to take care of. So at 18 I moved out and became financially independent. I was very fortunate, however, that I received a full tuition scholarship, plus another scholarship that helped with fees and books. I still had to provide for my own food and housing and other living expenses. I honestly didn't know you could get loans to help with that kind of stuff. Nobody told me anything about going to college and what options there were for paying for it. I'm honestly surprised with how well everything turned out considering how naive I was. I worked hard though. I consider it a character-building experience. I obviously can't work my way through medical school (should I be so fortunate to go), and I don't think I'll get a big scholarship, so I suppose I will have to take out loans.
 
boundlesscorpuscle said:
Just my experience, parents run the gamut. My parents aren't well off and had no money saved for college, so I paid for undergrad and will be taking out more loans to pay for med school. I have a friend with a physician father who helped with undergrad but is making her pay for med school. I have other friends with wealthy parents who are paying for all of their kids' schooling.

I kind of grew up glorifying independence and always found it difficult to accept help. But I think there's something to be said for accepting good fortune and gifts with grace, and paying forward what you can. I plan on helping my own children as much as I'm able, just as my folks did for me. And the hope is to make things easier for them.
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Same. I’m used to having no help so I have trouble accepting it.
 
I don’t want to be drowning but I like to be pushed hard. My mindset is in my avatar. Discomfort tempers the soul. A driving force behind my journey. What is life without struggle? How do you even figure out who you are?
 
I will not be getting help paying for med school but I do not have debt from undergrad due to my mom's benefits.

Never understood the concept of carrying debt = teaching a lesson. I was taught hard-work growing up. My mom and dad were immagrants and worked hard. In order to continue to generate intergenerational wealth you need to transfer that wealth a bit to your kids and your grandkids. If I do have kids (most likely not) I will try my hardest to pay for some of their schooling.
 
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