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Doctor with an active duty spouse?

Discussion in 'Spouses and Partners' started by JBG4, Jun 19, 2008.

  1. JBG4

    JBG4 Busy summer.

    Mar 22, 2008
    I am not sure what category to post this in, so if this is the wrong one, then please tell me. I am going to post it in several spots. I also searched for the topic, but didn't find anything of assistance.

    I am a senior in under-grad, and just applied to med school. My fiance is active duty Air Force. There are no doubts that we will stay together, but I just wanted some advice from someone who has been/is in the same situation. How does it work? How do you become a doctor and have a spouse active duty? Do you travel with them? How does it work with med school and residency and moving for both? I have heard of doctors traveling with their spouses and filling in for other doctors when they go on vacation, but can you really make a career out of that?

    Any advice would be appreciated. Send me in the right direction please.
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  3. tellsarah

    tellsarah 2+ Year Member

    Feb 9, 2008
    Long distance relationship. I would recommend the book "Married to the Military". To be married to a active duty service member, typically means their career dictates where you live, unless you opt to make them a geographical bachelor. Many spouses, with their own careers, choose to stay put because of the constant moving associated with the military lifestyle. This is all from my own personal experiences and observations.

    Just a heads up, this is a hard life, especially for someone who wants their own career.

    Good luck ;)
  4. natesgirl

    natesgirl 2+ Year Member

    Jun 2, 2008
    I will have to pipe in and say that married to the military (the book- is not worth your money) but that's me
  5. Neuronix

    Neuronix Total nerd Administrator Physician PhD Faculty SDN Advisor 10+ Year Member

    Mar 14, 2002
    the beach
    You will probably be separated geographically the entire time you are together while you train until your spouse separates from the air force unless you are very lucky. You should plan a long distance relationship for as long as your spouse is in the military.

    I'm not being negative. It is simple truth. You will apply to med school and probably get in a small number of schools. Your spouse will be stationed wherever with little preference given to your school and with the possibility of reassignment/deployment at any time. Repeat for residency. Once you are an attending, you know, 8 years or so from now, you'll have some flexibility with regards to the jobs you can choose. Just hope your spouse isn't stationed overseas where you can't get a job and maybe you can be together then.
  6. MicroBugs

    MicroBugs Member 10+ Year Member

    Jun 5, 2006
    Norfolk, VA
    I just wanted to throw in my experience. My husband is active duty Navy. The military has been a part of our lives for a long time. During the admissions process we discussed the possibility of being separated. Basically I decided it was either going to be near him or my family for me. Luckily I got in near him and we've been able to hang on here. He's also had the ability to change tours without having to go far thanks to a plethora of options in the area. We've lucked out.
    For the future, we know we need to be prepared for separation at some point. My advice, if he has anyway to choose his next station and receive orders before you need to make a school choice, talk and workout where you want to be. When he puts in his wish list, try to coordinate that each option has a medical school nearby. There's always the chance it won't work out. For that, maybe being near home for you is better, maybe not. But if you focus your apps near air force bases (and there are quite a few), then you should be able to make something work, for at least a few years. Yes, its hard and yes, one or both may need to make sacrifices in terms of where you want to be, but just decide, which is more important : being together or being at your "dream" school/station. I wish you luck! PM if you need to "vent".

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