Don't know what to do after college

[heythereshelly]

I am in need of major advice. Please bare with me here!

Many people tell me that it's too early for me to worry about what I want to do both during and after college, yet I can't help but to feel extremely anxious. To be honest, I'm not the type of person who can handle a whole lot of stress. I know I haven't even graduated high school yet, but classes like AP Government and Biology are tough enough as they are (at least, for me they are).

Yes, I work hard and am getting A's and B's in my classes (with 3 C's during my freshman year). In fact, I've gotten into the "top" public school in the nation. Yet, I'm not necessarily the most intelligent person out there as some people out there may believe. Nor am I the best communicator which is something that I definitely need to work on if I want a job. Finding a career is tough, and it's definitely going to get worse; I know that's for sure.

Anyways, the reason that I am posting this here is because I'm actually considering a career in the public health field with no pressure from my family. It's just something that I believe I may be interested in. Only thing is, I have absolutely NO idea what to specialize in.

I know, you're probably thinking that I am stupid and that I shouldn't go into the public health field unless I am sure I am passionate about it and that I know what my end goal is. I just don't know what all of the options are.

So far, I've went back and forth between becoming an epidemiologist, public health educator/promoter, physical therapist, physical therapist assistant, optometrist, psychiatrist, neuropathologist, speech pathologist, neurologist, nurse, and neurosurgeon. YES. I've thought through it all more times than any girl can change her clothes. And these are just occupations in the health field. I can assure you, my range of job ideas go way beyond this list.

The thing is, there's just so MUCH to consider. There's the thought of all the cutthroat competition out there, skyrocketing debt, lack of jobs near home (can you blame me for wanting to see my family at least once ever week?), work environment, possible burnout, academic and work stress, graduate school acceptance.... Then again, I'm sure these factors go for probably every job out there.

I know I have four more years left to decide, but I don't want to end up taking classes for a major that's going to end up being irrelevant to my future career. We've all been told to study what we're most passionate about, but what if your degree ends up being useless to you? You can't just expect to have your parents work their butts off just to pay for you to go to school, take classes in underwater basket weaving for four years, and then get out and have your family take care of your bills.

Maybe I'm psyching myself out too much too early. I don't know. Like I said, I'm only finishing up my senior year of high school. I just don't want to end up being unemployed, or working at some unsatisfactory job because I majored in something that I may only be interested in (I'm actually thinking about studying cognitive science).

Any advice for a lost teenager out there will be very much appreciated. 😳

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[heythereshelly]

Can someone give me at least a little bit of advice, please? Anything, big or little, will do. I just feel so hopeless right now.

 

[daisies2]

Wow. This sounds like me years and years ago. I have good and bad news. Good news, you have time. Making a career decision later in life has its own challenges. Bad news: its a frustrating problem not knowing what you want to do with yourself/your life, you may end up working hard at something only to find it isn't for you....it's likely. A big lesson I learned: It's ok to be lost. It's a scary place, but only when you allow yourself to be lost will you find where you belong. Lesson #2, contrary to what people will have you believe...some of us don't have a "calling" or one passion. We (or at least people like myself and you) can do well in several areas. Don't feel like someone without passion, you can find it.

Now, what you need to do now, is try not to stress about it. It's hard not to, but try. Try to get as much volunteer and work experience as you can that helps IMMENSELY. Also, shadow people, interview people, ask a lot of questions. My personal advice is that career counselors and tests are absolutely useless (my opinion of course). Some will disagree with me, but I think if you know the answer to the questions they ask you should have no problem knowing what you want to do to start with. If you absolutely can't find anything you are very interested in, major in something where you can work with a bachelors. That way you can save grad school for a possible career change, and you won't have invested so much money and energy. But before you do that, work and volunteer. Classes don't help you in getting a feel. One last thing, IMO being smart doesn't get you much ahead of working really hard and being open to learning and making mistakes. Good luck!! I hope this helped. I didn't want to write so much, but i couldn't resist you reminded me so much of myself. feel free to pm me if i can be of any help 🙂

 

[heythereshelly]

Thanks so much for responding! You did help. Also, it's really nice to know that I'm not the only one out there who's feeling or has felt the same way.

By the way, I sent you a PM. 🙂

 

[Epi12345]

As someone who switched majors twice and is now switching my career after 5 years, my advice is to stop worrying and live your life for the now. By that I mean try not to worry too much about what you are going to be doing in 5 years, instead try and focus on what you are actually interested in. I know it's cliche, but you will be so much happier if you just take classes in subjects that are interesting, surround yourself with smart people, an use your gift of intelligence to broaden your horizon as much as possible. Sure, one day you will need to choose a career, but even that can be changed if necessary. Take a deep breath and dive into something fun and interesting, you can always switch later if you find it doesn't suit you, and you will thank yourself for giving yourself the opportunity to learn and grow rather than forcing yourself to take a course to get the career that you think will be the most lucrative/productive/in demand in 4 years.

 

[heythereshelly]

You're right. I'm freaking out way too much for my own health. Guess I just can't help it. It does seem like a better idea to study something that I am really passionate about, rather than be stuck doing a high-paying job that I absolutely hate. Hopefully, I'll be able to find that something while making a comfortable living.

I know that this may sound really dumb, but there are some jobs that I would like to get into. It's just that a lot of the course requirements look like they downright suck. Physics and microbiology do not sound like something that I would be completely engrossed in (now, anatomy does seem kind of interesting).

By the way, can I ask what you originally majored in? Also, congratulations on your MPH acceptances. Best of luck to you!

 

[HSUReddie]

I was having this deja vu experience... until I realized that you did indeed post in hSDN too. So I won't repeat anything I've said over there...

As far as those careers that fall under medicine, neurologist and neurosurgeon, etc. - realize that medical schools strongly recommend you go into medical school with an open mind to all types of medicine.

Honestly, come to think of it, I sounded a lot like you at the start of undergrad about five years ago. I had decided to major in biology even though I hated it in high school because I thought I wanted to be a doctor... I was terrified of how much suffering I was going to go through and freaking out over whether or not this would all work out and if I could make it. Within my first year, I couldn't see myself majoring in anything else. Turns out I just needed good, passionate professors teaching me. I also spent a lot of time wondering if I could be in school this long. The further I get down my path though, the more sure I am that this is totally what I want to spend the rest of my life doing.

The best advice I can give you... undergrad is going to be harder than high school. But if you find something that you can easily channel hard work into, something you can be passionate about, it makes it much easier. You don't have to naturally be a genius. Just a hard worker. You're going to look at things ahead sometimes, and think "Gosh there's no way I can do that." False. You can. Because you will gradually learn how to handle more responsibility and difficulty. One of my favorite quotes from Nelson Mandela is "It always seems impossible until it is done." I think that's my entire educational experience in a nutshell right there.

Be okay with changing your mind and taking detours as time progresses. Don't stick with something purely because that is what you decided to do in the first place. You are allowed to change your mind. It is your future. Shadow. Volunteer. Find the thing that you just can't stop thinking about.

Burn out, stress, and sucky course requirements are likely going to come with the territory of whatever you pick. I had to take a year of physics. I hated every last second of it. I hated it on the MCAT, and it hated me right back. But it was worth every second to get a med school acceptance. You just have to find the thing that you love so much that regardless of the sucky parts that might be required along the way, you still love it. That probably sounds easier said than done, but I think if you take the time to explore your different interests through classes, shadowing, and volunteering in undergrad... you'll figure it out. Looking back, I would say it definitely isn't as daunting as it looks like from the beginning. I promise.

 

[364462]

Dear Lost Teenager:

I am a postdoctoral psychology fellow, which in teenage speak means I am a shrink. In fact, I am a shrink in a college counseling center in one of the universities in the Boston area. (Boston Strong!) I am young enough to know what my college students are talking about but also old enough to know more than they do, in some respects. This helps to build a trusting relationship in my work with the students. I graduated from college (where I studied psychology) in 2004 and from doctoral studies (where I studied clinical psychology) in 2012. I am matriculating to a MPH program in the fall.

I hear your words, and it bares repeating that you are not alone. Your concerns, wishes, and hopes reflect those of the students I see at the counseling center - and surely, those of so many others, young or not. I could tell you to relax, but I know that will not work. For one thing, relax means so many varied things to many people. One thing I would also say is that you are and will be navigating in an overly pressured environment, itself a product of adults who have done you and your peers a great deal of disservice. We (including adults in your own life) have expected too much of you and your peers with guidance that seems ill-advised albeit well-intentioned. We expect you to get high marks, to volunteer left and right, to be in leadership positions, and everything else short of creating world peace - all this on top of navigating teen relationships, friendships, sex and sexuality, YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. We expect you to thrive but have offered limited support and warmth along the way.

In my work with students at the counseling center, some students come to college ill-prepared for non-college life. Like you will be and surely are at this time, they too are smart and academically capable. I listen to their stories of this class and that class, recalling how upper-level courses seem to be the new "basic" courses. I suppose there is something to what others have said: The masters degree is the new college degree. However, for some of my students, particularly those who have had "helicopter" parents, they find it challenging to navigate life outside the classroom. Basic skills of organization and time management seem lost. Of course, like high school, these college students have obligations above and (very well) beyond the classroom, with extracurricular activities filling their hours. (High School 2.0) Many continue to struggle, nonetheless. Dan Savage says that It gets better. In college, it gets worse. Prepare yourself.

I also have found it helpful to provide concrete advise. What I give here comes from my own personal and academic experience, not from my work as a psychologist. (As a general rule, a good psychologist does not give advise. You want advise, talk to your friends and family - or in this case, a bunch of strangers online.) Here are a few pointers:

1. Depth is preferable over breadth. Instead of getting involved in numerous activities, commit to a few. This will increase the depth of your knowledge and skills, and it will also increase your chances of being in a leadership position by the time you are an upperclassman.

2. Unless you are passionate about the humanities (e.g., literature, philosophy, etc.), obtain sufficient technical and/or quantitative skills. This is key. Future employers can teach you content. What you bring to the job are your technical and quantitative skills. These may include courses in economics, statistics, calculus, chemistry, mathematics, etc., with preference for upper-level courses (e.g., abstract mathematics, research methods and statistics, etc.).

3. If you plan to take a standardized test (e.g., MCAT, GRE, LSAT, etc.), take it at the end of your college career or sometime soon after that. Whenever possible, avoid taking it years later. Your verbal knowledge, quantitative skills, etc., will be more fresh. So much of the GRE content, for example, are material you learned in high school and college. Many scores are good for a few years, enough time for you to consider whether or not you plan to return to school for graduate studies. When you do, then you will have already taken the test and can focus on maximizing other aspects of your graduate school application.

4. You and your peers are tech savvy. Take advantage of this. You are operating in a world that is very well connected. Use this, wallow in it, swim in it. I am not only talking about the use of apps to manage your day-to-day life. I am talking about how to integrate technology into your overall goals. For example, is there a space for social media in your career goals? In what ways can you use it to make a better world? One of the students I am seeing at the counseling center has applied for a grant to do development work in Southeast Asia, where he will facilitate the use of cellular technology for local farmers. And he is only a sophomore. This is the world you live in.

5. Eat (whole) foods, mostly plants.

6. No means no. If he/she cannot say yes, this also means no.

7. If you cannot reach the condom with one hand, then it is too far.

8. When it doubt, throw it out.

9. Some things will not work, some things will fail, some things will outright suck. But not everything will suck, not everything will fail, and some things will work.

10. You are more than the sum of your education and career.

Good luck to you, my friend.

Sincerely,

Your Adult Self

 

[undecidedman]

I think porkbunsrule posted a good amount of information. But to add something to the mix, you listed off a few careers. I suggest, you google some of these careers in your city and see if you can find someone who has good reviews based on some review site. Than, email the psychologist, epidemiologist, neurologist, etc. and write a short but sweet email telling them you are interested in that career and were hoping you could have lunch with them on a Saturday or maybe dinner at some restaurant. Write out questions you have... if you aren't sure, google what types of questions to ask like 1.)what they do on a day to day basis; 2.) do they like their career, 3.) if they had to do it again, would they?

If you need help crafting emails, finding people, or thinking of questions to ask, feel free to PM me and we can try and work it out.

But here is something you should be very proud of.. you are way ahead of your peers! Some of them won't know what they want to do and won't take any action to figure it out; others will know what they want to do but won't research it and find out that the perfect career is far from perfect and it's a big shock at that point. So continue to question everything, and never take something at face value. Treat advice like you would a research paper, always have multiple sources to make sure you are getting the best advice possible.

 

[heythereshelly]

Thanks so much guys for the amazing inspiration and responses that you have each sent my way. I will try to put them to good use!

I don't mean to sound like a pessimistic teenager since I know that getting a career is not something that should be taken lightly. I just can't help but to worry about the future.

Yes, passion is, above all, necessary when it comes to what you want to do. The only thing is that: I know what I love to study; I just can't find a career option that I can imagine seeing myself taking.

We all hear that getting an MPH is useless and that you don't get to do much with it. But then, there are many people out there (many of them who are experienced in their fields) who also tell you not to get a PhD because you'll end up either: a) not getting a good paying career afterwards, b) not surviving a PhD program, c) being poor/lonely/sleep-deprived for the next 7+ years that you get a PhD, etc.

Then, there are OTHERS who tell you not to become a physician, because it's highly stressful and that you will always have someone's life in your hands (I just can't handle the thought of making just one slight mistake and costing someone's life). Even physician assistants, who only have to go to school for 2 years, usually find a tougher time paying off their debt than actual doctors,,, and they're liable for pretty much whatever their physicians do above their control. Physical therapy sounds like a nice option, but they end up making so much less than physician assistants.

My brother told me that I can become a software engineer, because supposedly you will always have a high paying career to fall back on. Even articles rank software engineering as the best job in America. But really? In a few years, that's not going to be an option. And why would I even want to spend the rest of my life programming? It seems incredibly stressful, having to meet a deadline every single week or so.

Some things that I also used to want to be was an author, journalist, or teacher, and even those careers don't seem like viable options for a terrible economy like this (due to job insecurity, underpayment, overwork stress). Science writing caught my mind quite recently, but how the heck am I supposed to find a job like that where I live? The competition is extreme in those fields.

I can't handle thinking about this anymore. I feel like, the second I walk out of college, I will end up joining the ranks of the unemployed no matter what my GPA will be, no matter how hard I study, no matter what school I go to for my undergraduate.

People tell you that you're better off going to a four-year college than a community college, and that you'll be guaranteed more opportunities in the work field straight afterwards. That is SO not true. Maybe things were a LITTLE better years before, but things have changed. Now, jobs everywhere are asking for people with more years of experience, with graduate degrees, etc.

This is stressing me out so BADLY.

 

[ebp]

heythereshelly - to be honest with you, I think you're stressing out too much. You're young, and you have a lot of life and experiences ahead of you. Be open to that. Don't try to stress too much and make too many plan right now. One thing I've learned in life through my own experiences is that plans change. That's ok. Not everything works out the way you think it will. Some thing fall apart in a way that seems terrible at the time, but then it opens new doors.

Some of the advice here is good - like make sure to get quantitative skills out of college. Some are well intentioned. Remember to enjoy being young. Enjoy college. You only have one life. You need to balance being a good student and working toward your goals and enjoying life.

Trying out different classes in college to see what you like and what you're good at it is one way to start deciding what you should do post-college. Don't get too stressed out about getting a Masters or PhD right now. I know this all seems daunting, but keep in mind that many of us are a bit older and took different routes to get ourselves to where we are right now. That's ok. Stop freaking out, take what you can from everyone's advice, and remember to just slow down.

 

[heythereshelly]

You are right. I am stressing out way too much for my own good. There's just so much pressure (mostly from myself) to do my best and to succeed, all the while having a balanced life. I'm only a high school student, and I already find the smallest things stressful. To imagine how it could be like in the future is unbearable, especially since I'm uncertain as to where I am heading.

 

[undecidedman]

Thanks so much guys for the amazing inspiration and responses that you have each sent my way. I will try to put them to good use!

I don't mean to sound like a pessimistic teenager since I know that getting a career is not something that should be taken lightly. I just can't help but to worry about the future.

Yes, passion is, above all, necessary when it comes to what you want to do. The only thing is that: I know what I love to study; I just can't find a career option that I can imagine seeing myself taking.

We all hear that getting an MPH is useless and that you don't get to do much with it. But then, there are many people out there (many of them who are experienced in their fields) who also tell you not to get a PhD because you'll end up either: a) not getting a good paying career afterwards, b) not surviving a PhD program, c) being poor/lonely/sleep-deprived for the next 7+ years that you get a PhD, etc.

Then, there are OTHERS who tell you not to become a physician, because it's highly stressful and that you will always have someone's life in your hands (I just can't handle the thought of making just one slight mistake and costing someone's life). Even physician assistants, who only have to go to school for 2 years, usually find a tougher time paying off their debt than actual doctors,,, and they're liable for pretty much whatever their physicians do above their control. Physical therapy sounds like a nice option, but they end up making so much less than physician assistants.

My brother told me that I can become a software engineer, because supposedly you will always have a high paying career to fall back on. Even articles rank software engineering as the best job in America. But really? In a few years, that's not going to be an option. And why would I even want to spend the rest of my life programming? It seems incredibly stressful, having to meet a deadline every single week or so.

Some things that I also used to want to be was an author, journalist, or teacher, and even those careers don't seem like viable options for a terrible economy like this (due to job insecurity, underpayment, overwork stress). Science writing caught my mind quite recently, but how the heck am I supposed to find a job like that where I live? The competition is extreme in those fields.

I can't handle thinking about this anymore. I feel like, the second I walk out of college, I will end up joining the ranks of the unemployed no matter what my GPA will be, no matter how hard I study, no matter what school I go to for my undergraduate.

People tell you that you're better off going to a four-year college than a community college, and that you'll be guaranteed more opportunities in the work field straight afterwards. That is SO not true. Maybe things were a LITTLE better years before, but things have changed. Now, jobs everywhere are asking for people with more years of experience, with graduate degrees, etc.

This is stressing me out so BADLY.

Let us dissect this post a little. What is stressing you out so much? It seems it is mainly that you might come out of college without a good paying job, right? That's what it seems like the big factor is. So how do we solve that? Well, if you graduate college with high debt, the stress would only increase. So find ways to have the least amount of debt possible from a 4 year degree (might mean going to a 2nd tier school that offers a full ride vs. your top choice that offers no scholorships/awards, or maybe a 2 year school and than transfer to a public 4 year school).

Second factor, you need a job after college. You already realize that what companies care about most is experience. So during your college career, try to pick out APPLIED classes. Courses that have labs, projects, etc. After your first year or the summer between your first and second year, gain an internship. Begin to build up your resume by doing this.

You also found out something important...no career is perfect. A medical doctor may have a high salary, but high levels of stress; a psychologist may have a interesting career but low salary, a software engineer may be worried his/her job will be outsourced, etc... there will never be a perfect job. The best you can do is find something you like and use that as motivation to advance in the career.

Regarding higher education... no one says that you have to apply right out of college. In fact, for most people, it would be beneficial to get out into the world and start using their degree first and working so that if/when they do enter a Master's, Ph.D program, they can use their real life examples in the program, as well as being more motivated to succeed.