OSUdoc08 said:
It has nothing to do with success rates and relapses and all to do with SELF-CONTROL.
The relapse occurs when you decide to buy Little Debbies at Kroger.
Just don't.
Physicians should have this self-control, and not be getting surgery to narrow the lumen of their stomach so they can't fit as much food down there.
We had a classmate get this surgery, but claim she was hospitalized with EBV mononucleosis. We used class funds to buy her flowers and a card.
That b***h just couldn't quit eating desserts.
wow.
there's a book. it's old. but it's still really valid when it comes to women and weight. it's called "fat is a feminist issue."
whether conscious or not, for a lot of women, weight issues and food issues have NOTHING to do with a lack self control around eating. eating, not eating, what one's eating are huge preoccupations. it even usually has NOTHING really to do with food at all. eating isn't about food for a lot of people. it's about self-care, self-love, and filling a non-food-hunger void.
granted, not true for everyone, but it's common enough that you should be aware and empathetic about it.
maybe for you "just not eating dessert" is a simple matter of deciding not to and then moving on. that's not true for everyone.
i want to reiterate something someone else posted. do you think it's easy being overweight in this society? do you think someone who's heavy doesn't realize that fact? or doesn't realize how much people like you, who are many, hate them and blame them for it? do you think it's easy? easy to be heavy? easy to lose weight?
i'm overweight by about 50 lbs. i'm 30, and overstressed, and have no time (i make the choice to give a lot of time to my community in addition to regular responsibilites) but last summer, i really tried to lose. i dieted, i exercized. by the end of about 6 months, i managed to drop 20 lbs. but you know what? i was still fat. i worked so hard for months, deprived myself of everything i enjoyed eating, put my friends and fun on hold for the gym 5X a week (i couldn't let gym time interfere with my volunteer work, two jobs, or classes) and i was more miserable than when i started. i felt so awful all the time. and i hated myself more than i had when i was fatter, because now, not only did i feel like those with issues about my weight hated me, but i felt like i was hating myself by putting myself through the process. i grew up in a family where food was love. you cooked only for people you loved. you showed people you loved them by cooking for them. that was ingrained early on my psyche. with the overlapping and contradictory societal imprinting that only thin people are "good" and "smart" and atll that BS. dieting makes me feel like i hate myself, because it was me not feeding myself and it was me giving in and believing society that if i was fat i was dumb and bad.
so i stopped dieting, because i don't hate myself. and i refuse to put the hatred and judgement of others (like you) on myself. i don't lack self control, i know that. i sleep 4 hours a night. i work two jobs and volunteer up to 30 hours on top of it. i'm punctual and hard working and highly productive. i'm incredibly self-diciplined in most things. i'm not fat because i can't control what i eat. i can if i choose to, but i choose something else. and that's my right as a person. you, me, future patients, everyone has a right to make their own choices as long as they accept the consequences. i keep working out 3X a week, and mind you, with what my day job is right now, even with 50 extra pounds, i guarantee you i am at least as fit as you are, and i'm perfectly healthy, but i quit the dieting. and i feel much better.
the turning point? i was at the gym in oversized yoga pants and a big t-shirt, running on the tread mill because god forbid that i ever make anyone look at my societally unacceptable body... had my iPod on, but could still hear people around me. these two guys, probably early 20's, walk by and one say to the other "goddamnit, i wish they would have separate gyms for fat people. i hate to see them jiggling around, it makes me sick." he could have been talking about me, or the other woman two down from me, but it didn't matter. i realized that i'm healthy. and if it's people like that who i'm trying to live up to their expectations of me, that's BS and screw it, they're not worth it. people who want everyone to be thin, but don't want to deal with people, or cut them slack, when they're TRYING to get there. again, screw 'em. that snapped me out of my being an accomplice in it all. and it's been much better since...
[EDIT] to bring it back to the OP. i'm sure it depends on the patient. personally, i don't see how me being heavy would hurt anything. let's say i have a patient who's not fit and for whom losing weight could help with a specific medical issue, let's say GIRD, for example. i'd say to the patient " i know you probably know this, but losing weight could help with this problem. losing weight can be really hard for most people..." at which point they would likely pipe up about all the things they've tried in the past...and then, i could talk to them about what felt like it was or wasn't working and why whatever effort they had stopped before, and work with them, if they are interested in losing (always leaving that as their choice as an adult with control over their own body), in terms of getting them support that is appropriate for them -- weight watchers, nutritionist, personal trainer, therapy, etc...