Favorite Caddyshack Quotes

[Matte Kudesai]

The incomparable Judge Elihu Smails in honor of Yaah (ever have an attending like this?)

" You know, you should play with Dr. Beeper and myself. I mean, he's been club champion for three years running and I'm no slouch myself. "


"It's easy to grin / When your ship comes in / And you've got the stock market beat. / But the man worthwhile, / Is the man who can smile, / When his shorts are too tight in the seat. "

"How about a Fresca?"

"You'll get nothing, and like it"

"Spaulding, get dressed you're playing golf"

"Danny, I'm having a party this weekend. How would you like to come over and mow my lawn? "

"Well, the world needs ditch diggers, too. "

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[yaah]

Spaulding get your foot off the boat.


Hey baby you must have been something before electricity. You're a lot of woman, you know that? Wanna make $15 the hard way?


Elihu, will you come loofa my stretch marks?

 

[Projectile]

I got a pond and a pool. The pond would be good for you.

 

[Ziehl-Neelsen]

You call this a steak? I can still see the marks where the jockey was hitting it.

And the inimitable classic: Did somebody step on a duck? My fiancee hates when I dig that one out.



RIP Rodney Dangerfield. Eternal rest grant unto him o Lord and may perpetual light shine upon him.

 

[RyMcQ]

So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one - big hitter, the Lama - long, into a ten-thousand foot crevasse, right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga... gunga, gunga-galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

 

[yaah]

RIP Rodney Dangerfield. Eternal rest grant unto him o Lord and may perpetual light shine upon him.

set my friend up with the whole schmear.
You know, clubs, bags, gloves, shirt, pants, orange balls! I'll have a box of those, and give me a box of those naked-lady tees. Oh, look at this, this is the worst-looking hat I ever saw! I'll bet if you buy a hat like that, you get a free bowl of soup. Oh, but it looks good on you though (rolls eyes).


Let's go, while we're young!

 

[Gut Shot]

"I sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it... felt I owed it to them."