Fear of giving up acceptances?

[Jolie South]

So, i absolutely know where i want to go to school and money wouldn't change my choice. yet, i still feel weird about dropping my acceptances from other schools although i really want to free up my spots for people that are waiting.

i don't know why, but i'm totally afraid of my school calling me up and saying that they don't want me for some stupid reason like they found out that my 8th grade projects from art class weren't as intricate or well executed as they could have been.

yes, i know this is absolutely irrational. 🙂

anyone else feel like this at all?

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[TheRealMD]

So, i absolutely know where i want to go to school and money wouldn't change my choice. yet, i still feel weird about dropping my acceptances from other schools although i really want to free up my spots for people that are waiting.

i don't know why, but i'm totally afraid of my school calling me up and saying that they don't want me for some stupid reason like they found out that my 8th grade projects from art class weren't as intricate or well executed as they could have been.

yes, i know this is absolutely irrational. 🙂

anyone else feel like this at all?

I feel this all the time. I'm still kinda holding on to my UTMB acceptance even though I know that Baylor is where I'm going without a doubt.

I guess we need a little shove in the right direction (and a deadline helps soo much).

 

[scowdeva]

Jolie, I understand that it is probably hard to let go of those acceptances. I really do! However, as a person who is desperately hoping to get off the waitlist at Temple, please, please, please let it go! You have Baylor! There is no possible way that they are going to come back and un-accept you! Please cherish those acceptances as long as you need to before letting them go...that is, up until about May 1st or so 🙂 Then set them free, to go on their merry way! I promise, if I end up with your Temple spot, I will treat it with the utmost love and care!

 

[TheRealMD]

I wonder, can schools un-accept you? I think I might get my first C this sem. Oy!!

 

[skyeblue0610]

I think for you guys you don't want to let go of all your hard work. Like it's almost better saying, "btw, I'm accepted at W,X,Y, and Z schools of medicine" instead of just "I'm going to Y school of medicine in the fall." Or you just feel a bit more "pride" saying it

But you should let go, and share the love with some other hard working folks who are hangout out on waitlists.

Just my two cents of what I would do

 

[HumidBeing]

Ha! And a year from now I wouldn't be surprised to see you posting that you're having a recurring dream that someone approaches you in class, apologizes, and takes you aside to explain that they just realized they mailed you the wrong letter. "I'm sorry, ma'am. You'll have to leave immediately. Security will be here to escort you to the door."

Being irrational is normal.😀

 

[EpiPEN]

Breathe and let go and do the right thing of just letting other people take up the spots you aren't taking in the first place. You feel better afterwards. Atleast, I did.

 

[BaylorLion]

I wonder, can schools un-accept you? I think I might get my first C this sem. Oy!!

Theoretically, yes. But... not over a C. Your acceptance, in the legal fine print, is contingent on your maintaining academic performance, but what i basically think this means is that you can't go from straight A's or mostly A's and a couple B's to 1 C, 3 D's and an F. That is going to make them definitely go, "WTF?"

1 C, though? Heh, you're entitled after all this time. Just imagine if you're still doing rotations after Match Day! Your motivation will fall to negative numbers then...

 

[Blade28]

Don't worry! You'll be fine! 👍

 

[dth92]

So, i absolutely know where i want to go to school and money wouldn't change my choice. yet, i still feel weird about dropping my acceptances from other schools although i really want to free up my spots for people that are waiting.

i don't know why, but i'm totally afraid of my school calling me up and saying that they don't want me for some stupid reason like they found out that my 8th grade projects from art class weren't as intricate or well executed as they could have been.

yes, i know this is absolutely irrational. 🙂

anyone else feel like this at all?

Remember those acceptances are YOURS, you earned them. It is not your responsibility to get other people accepted to med school. So hold your acceptances as long as you like. I know I will be doing that with mine. Everybody else can just sit tight till May 15. Mwahaha

 

[SBBunny]

Congratulations on your acceptances! Have you considered calling the school just to double check? Admissions offices tend to be really friendly and I'm sure they won't mind humoring you. It'll probably brighten their day and help ease your worry! You don't have to feel bad, applying to med school can make even the most stable of applicants acquire nervous habits.

Now... to everyone who is worried about giving up their acceptances...
Pleeeeaaaaaase withdraw if you know that you won't be attending. There are lots of waitlisted applicants who would really, really like to know where we're going to be next year. Think of the waitlisted applicants. PLEEEEAAASE?

 

[nhtreehugger]

My big worry is that I'll suck as a doctor. I mean, the stuff in our applications doesn't guarantee that we'll be good at diagnosing, performing procedures, etc. I'm worried that I'll "disappoint" the school I go to *booo

 

[dienekes88]

It's understandable. I felt the same way.

Actually withdrawing from my other acceptance was ironically the specific thing that helped me get over the fear of giving it up. By withdrawing, my commitment to the school I'll be attending in the fall went from "so freakin' sure" to "100%, definitely, no other possible choice."

Also, getting a confirmation letter helped a bunch.

 

[taponthecloud]

it's not a big deal!!! we've worked hard for our acceptances. i don't see what difference it would make in terms of waitlist movement. most schools won't go to their waitlist until may 15th anyway, so people on the waitlist will eventually get in; for them it's a matter of WHEN not IF. hang on to them if it makes you feel more comfortable. 👍

 

[scowdeva]

it's not a big deal!!! we've worked hard for our acceptances. i don't see what difference it would make in terms of waitlist movement. most schools won't go to their waitlist until may 15th anyway, so people on the waitlist will eventually get in; for them it's a matter of WHEN not IF. hang on to them if it makes you feel more comfortable. 👍

The logistics of the WHEN are not that simple for everyone, though. If you are honestly still deciding where you want to go, then by all means hold that sucker. However, if you're just doing to be a hoarder, then it really serves absolutely no purpose and makes no sense. The difference in waitlist movement would be huge if everyone, or even a lot of people, would withdraw when they know that school isn't right for them. Think about it...if the withdrawals trickle in at a somewhat steady rate rather than all in a rush on a certain day, the office would actually have time to process who they are selecting to fill the spot in a timely manner rather than starting a mad scramble. We all know how (un)efficient most offices are. A rush on May 15 translates into them maybe starting to send out acceptances to waitlistees at the end of the month or June.

Now take my situation: the school that I am accepted at STARTS in June. However, I really, really want to go to a school I'm waitlisted at. It's not a first choice school for a lot of people, and is often seen as a safety school, but it IS perfect for me. Because of people just sitting on their acceptances for the fun of it, I know that I have a very slim window of opportunity to get accepted before my other school starts. So then I am in the predicament of starting at one school and then cutting and leaving them high and dry if I get taken from the waitlist before the other school starts in August. To me this is a horrible choice to have to even consider- actually matriculating at one school only to withdraw when they can no longer fill the seat if I get a better offer once classes have already begun. But at the same time, this is my future as well, and it is a huge decision to be making.

No one is implying that you didn't earn your multiple acceptances. However, you can only attend one school in the fall. It is a commendable accomplishment to have been accepted to many schools, and congrats! Even so, just holding onto it for the sake of having it even though you know you don't want to attend there is very selfish and only serves to inconvienence your future colleagues. Just think about what you would want someone to do if the shoe was on the other foot...

 

[adokotala]

What is the final date that you can hold multiple acceptances until? Is it May 1 or May 15?

 

[scowdeva]

What is the final date that you can hold multiple acceptances until? Is it May 1 or May 15?

By May 15 you have to have it down to just one. I put May 1 earlier in this thread just as an encouragement to start my trickle-in theory that I started yammering about in my second post.

Man, I wish I could get to sleep tonight...


Edit: ok, I am editing this as some people obviously can't tell that I'm not 100% serious about my trickle down nonsense. I'm not trying to COERCE people into doing something, and I don't particularly need to delete MORE emails berating me for this. People are going to do what they want to do, I get it. I've never secretly tried to infiltrate to encourage people to drop an acceptance- like I've said multiple times, if you think you actually might want to go there, for whatever reasons, sit on it until the end of days as far as I'm concerned. This is a freakin' forum, the OP (who I like and respect) was asking for peoples' opinions. I gave mine, with a tiny bit (but not all of) my reasoning behind it. Just trying to add to a conversation the other side of the spectrum on this issue. Ok, back to the regularly scheduled programming...

 

[Asparta]

Congrats on your acceptances!!

I recently withdrew from a good CA school to go to another CA school that I liked.

You wont be rejected after you are accepted. Let it go and let others have a chance. 🙂

 

[1956Goldtop]

I'm pretty sure you don't have the option of leaving one school "high and dry" when it comes to the possibility of matriculating at the school you are waitlisted at. Most schools will not accept you off the waitlist if you have already matriculated somewhere.

 

[nutrition]

I think part of the reason that I haven't gotten around to withdrawing from schools is that it requires emailing them individually. I wish there was a place on the AMCAS or something where you could just select the school name and press withdraw.

 

[scowdeva]

I'm pretty sure you don't have the option of leaving one school "high and dry" when it comes to the possibility of matriculating at the school you are waitlisted at. Most schools will not accept you off the waitlist if you have already matriculated somewhere.

I'm accepted at an osteo school (that I like but do not love) and my dream school is an allo one. The 'recommendations' don't say anything about osteo schools, technically it's a loophole, and a really crappy thing to do...but I don't want to hijack from the original topic.

 

[scowdeva]

I think part of the reason that I haven't gotten around to withdrawing from schools is that it requires emailing them individually. I wish there was a place on the AMCAS or something where you could just select the school name and press withdraw.

Out of curiousity, can you go to the website of the school and just click the 'withdraw' button? I know not all schools have this, but for the ones that do, would that be enough to withdraw your acceptance or do you NEED to email them?

 

[taponthecloud]

The logistics of the WHEN are not that simple for everyone, though. If you are honestly still deciding where you want to go, then by all means hold that sucker. However, if you're just doing to be a hoarder, then it really serves absolutely no purpose and makes no sense. The difference in waitlist movement would be huge if everyone, or even a lot of people, would withdraw when they know that school isn't right for them. Think about it...if the withdrawals trickle in at a somewhat steady rate rather than all in a rush on a certain day, the office would actually have time to process who they are selecting to fill the spot in a timely manner rather than starting a mad scramble. We all know how (un)efficient most offices are. A rush on May 15 translates into them maybe starting to send out acceptances to waitlistees at the end of the month or June.

So? For the majority of folks, orientation is still in Aug or early Sept which is months and months away. Just because it's inconvenient for you, doesn't mean it a problem for everyone...

Now take my situation: the school that I am accepted at STARTS in June. However, I really, really want to go to a school I'm waitlisted at. It's not a first choice school for a lot of people, and is often seen as a safety school, but it IS perfect for me. Because of people just sitting on their acceptances for the fun of it, I know that I have a very slim window of opportunity to get accepted before my other school starts. So then I am in the predicament of starting at one school and then cutting and leaving them high and dry if I get taken from the waitlist before the other school starts in August. To me this is a horrible choice to have to even consider- agreeing to attend one school only to withdraw if I get a better offer once classes have already begun. But at the same time, this is my future as well, and it is a huge decision to be making.

Trust me, not many people are "hoarding" or sitting on their multiple acceptances "for the fun of it." I'm sure many people who have received multiple acceptances from top choices have by now already dropped their safety schools.

You've already been accepted to a school (which starts in June)... I don't know why you're complaining about being on the waitlist of your preferred school (which starts in Aug). If things work out in your favor, you'll get in eventually and well in time for the first day of school. Prodding others to drop their acceptances won't make a difference in terms helping your chances of getting off the waitlist in this case.

As for being afraid of leaving your accepted school "high and dry" for your preferred waitlist school... I'm sure they won't even notice... Do you think you're the only student they've accepted or something? Dropping a school for a better one is something many applicants must do...that's life, no big deal, get over it.

Even so, just holding onto it for the sake of having it even though you know you don't want to attend there is very selfish and only serves to inconvienence your future colleagues. Just think about what you would want someone to do if the shoe was on the other foot...

Oh give me a break and get off your high horse, missy. You knew the rules before you started this application cycle. Everyone is allowed to hold on to multiple acceptances until May 15th. Just because the process didn't work out in your favor doesn't mean you should begin passing judgment on other people and their decisions.

 

[flip26]

You are entitled to hold on to them until May 15 for your reasons - good reasons or irrational reasons. Waitlists don't start moving until then anyway. I don't see how it makes a hill of beans difference to anybody else...

I think that some people around here drop acceptances prematurely.

 

[dd128]

I definitely get the irrational fear thing. Part of me is still worried I'm going to get a call with a long drawn out apology of why I was mistakenly accepted Followed of course by, "thanks for your interest in our school, and we hope your endeavors into medicine are successful"

I'm just hoping the premed neurosis stuff goes away and I'm not like scarred for life!

 

[callmedonnie]

I think part of the reason that I haven't gotten around to withdrawing from schools is that it requires emailing them individually. I wish there was a place on the AMCAS or something where you could just select the school name and press withdraw.

yes this would be terrific.

 

[Blade28]

My big worry is that I'll suck as a doctor. I mean, the stuff in our applications doesn't guarantee that we'll be good at diagnosing, performing procedures, etc. I'm worried that I'll "disappoint" the school I go to *booo

That's why med school is 4 years, and residency is 3-7!

Time to learn to become a good physician!

 

[punkindrublic]

Fear is April 2 with 0 acceptances.

 

[Dazedinvt]

I'm on the waitlist, hoping and worrying. And if I was any of you multiple acceptance holders, I'd do whatever I wanted 🙂 It's no big deal in the end. When you withdraw doesn't matter, I'm either going to get in or not. Ultimately it's my own fault I'm on the waitlist so I certainly don't expect you to do me any favors or blame you all for being so amazing that multiple schools want you!

 

[MilkmanAl]

Fear is April 2 with 0 acceptances.

I'm on the waitlist, hoping and worrying. And if I was any of you multiple acceptance holders, I'd do whatever I wanted 🙂 It's no big deal in the end. When you withdraw doesn't matter, I'm either going to get in or not. Ultimately it's my own fault I'm on the waitlist so I certainly don't expect you to do me any favors or blame you all for being so amazing that multiple schools want you!

Agreed with both of the above. But...uh...could you Arkansas people maybe, I dunno, withdraw? Please? With sugar on top? 😛

 

[patiencebites]

I think part of the reason that I haven't gotten around to withdrawing from schools is that it requires emailing them individually. I wish there was a place on the AMCAS or something where you could just select the school name and press withdraw.

I sympathize with The OP, I'm sure I would feel the same way. But OH MY GOD I hate you.

 

[MsJLewis]

I say hold onto the ones that are still considering. I got into a bunch of schools and started withdrawing from the ones that I didn't fall in love with. I was wavering on withdrawing from one particular school (which I like A LOT) a couple of weeks ago that was a little lower on my list. I had made up my mind to withdraw this week until they e-mailed me with a scholarship offer yesterday. So I would say hold onto your acceptances until all the financial "dust" has settled then make a decision... unless you're rich and money is of no concern.

 

[Doublecortin]

So, i absolutely know where i want to go to school and money wouldn't change my choice. yet, i still feel weird about dropping my acceptances from other schools although i really want to free up my spots for people that are waiting.

i don't know why, but i'm totally afraid of my school calling me up and saying that they don't want me for some stupid reason like they found out that my 8th grade projects from art class weren't as intricate or well executed as they could have been.

yes, i know this is absolutely irrational. 🙂

anyone else feel like this at all?

😱😱😱
Jesus, for the sake of your karma, please give up those acceptances so that poor souls out there can find out their fate 😡

 

[Doublecortin]

I feel this all the time. I'm still kinda holding on to my UTMB acceptance even though I know that Baylor is where I'm going without a doubt.

I guess we need a little shove in the right direction (and a deadline helps soo much).

how about being considerate to those who will be your future colleagues??? 😡

 

[pride4jc727]

I don't know how many people got a letter when decisions came in saying that they were placed on the very competitive category and that a decision regarding acceptance or placement on the alternate list will be made sometime this month. I got this last week, so I know that I am this ("ll") close to a possible acceptance. So yes, if you do have an acceptance to RWJMS and are definitely not going, it could make a difference for people like me in this category.

But in any case, Jolie, congrats on your acceptances! I do appreciate your concern for people on the cuff like me, between an acceptance or possibly a HP Alternate status or who are on the Alternate List.

 

[nutrition]

I sympathize with The OP, I'm sure I would feel the same way. But OH MY GOD I hate you.

Do as you please, and I will do the same.

 

[Bartelby]

I'm not afraid of giving up my acceptances. I gave up one right when I received the letter because I knew I would go elsewhere, and as soon as financial aid info comes in I will look over the relevant programs and information and make my final decision. I can't imagine being actually afraid that a school would rescind its offer-- it never crossed my mind.

 

[paradocs we are]

This thread = 👎

I never particularly liked snobby crap.

 

[PreMD86]

Jolie,

I agree that you've earned your acceptances, and that it's your right to hold on to it for as long as your heart desires. It's also your right to never slow down to help the poor driver trying to make a left on a busy street, not put the toilet seat up for your husband after you use it (that's right, I believe in gender equality), or advance to the second gas pump when there's a driver behind you waiting for the first. However, it seems to me a matter of courtesy to free up that seat as soon as you know you won't be attending that school.
You have a golden ticket to one of best, cheapest schools in the country. Your professional and financial future is secure. You know in your heart you will never go to Temple and Baylor will never drop you. There are alot of people out there that are dying to hear from Temple, to know whether they have to reapply, to find a job for next year, to start finding housing and living arrangements. I'm holding onto a Temple acceptance myself, and know that as soon as I get into a better school, I'll drop it like a hot potato. Do the right thing and let it go...

 

[malsponge]

please drop the Tulane acceptance! Haha

 

[prettymonkey]

as of this very moment i am only holding one acceptance. that was really scary. seriously. good luck to everyone.

 

[SCRdoc]

I completely understand how you feel. I've got 2 acceptances, and have had to turn down 4 interviews out of consideration for others. However, I've received 2 more interview invites that I plan on going to because I want to be on the safe side. It's hard to let something go easily after waiting for so long and working hard to get it. I believe that it's entirely up to the individual to let go or not. Good luck to the people waiting for acceptances.

 

[UVABranch]

I completely understand how you feel. I've got 2 acceptances, and have had to turn down 4 interviews out of consideration for others. However, I've received 2 more interview invites that I plan on going to because I want to be on the safe side. It's hard to let something go easily after waiting for so long and working hard to get it. I believe that it's entirely up to the individual to let go or not. Good luck to the people waiting for acceptances.

are you rally letting it go if you already have an aceptance to a school you plan to go to? I totally see both side of the story and I dont have an acceptance. Much like MsJ and other have said if you know you won't go to the school, I do see it as personal courtacy to relinquish the acceptance (because it really does have a ripple or tickle down affect for many other schools as I'm sure we can all see, even if you don't care for the theory). If however you are stiill considering attending the school, and you are waiting for fin aid to come in, or other factore to weigh in your decision then hold on tight. Keep in mind we are all working long and hard to get to this goal, with vairying backgrouns and reason why/how we got to this point. I don't believe anyone is more or less deserving if they have 5 acceptances, or 5 waitlists, we all want the same thing, and we should try not to make such sweeping justment of others. I do however believe in karma, an if your reasons are of a selfih nature then in the end it will probably come back to you. My guess is that only the minority of multiple acceptance holders are in that group. Compassion is one of the key qualities that all schools are looking for in a potential physician, so even if you don't agree with other posters at least try to see whre they are coming from.

 

[Kaustikos]

So long as you don't have my top choice school, I'm fine.

If you do👎 You fail👎

And this is just my pessimistic side talking.

 

[April16MCAT]

To all the people on waitlist, didn't they tell you that you would not hear before May 15th? So if I wait until May 1 to let my other offers go- would you really gain anything?
I know some one mentioned that it would allow the school to get the offers out quicker if they knew how many they have to give on may 1th, but I am sure they already have some kind of priority list even if they don't tell applicants.
If some one can explain this to me, I will gladly let my offers at two schools go.

Also, I agree it would be nice if they had an easy process to tell schools. Is everyone doing email, letters, or phone? Is phone allowed?

 

[Jolie South]

To all the people on waitlist, didn't they tell you that you would not hear before May 15th? So if I wait until May 1 to let my other offers go- would you really gain anything?
I know some one mentioned that it would allow the school to get the offers out quicker if they knew how many they have to give on may 1th, but I am sure they already have some kind of priority list even if they don't tell applicants.
If some one can explain this to me, I will gladly let my offers at two schools go.

Also, I agree it would be nice if they had an easy process to tell schools. Is everyone doing email, letters, or phone? Is phone allowed?

I think e-mail is better simply because you have proof that you sent it and officially withdrew.

 

[scowdeva]

To all the people on waitlist, didn't they tell you that you would not hear before May 15th? So if I wait until May 1 to let my other offers go- would you really gain anything?
I know some one mentioned that it would allow the school to get the offers out quicker if they knew how many they have to give on may 1th, but I am sure they already have some kind of priority list even if they don't tell applicants.
If some one can explain this to me, I will gladly let my offers at two schools go.

Also, I agree it would be nice if they had an easy process to tell schools. Is everyone doing email, letters, or phone? Is phone allowed?

I'll address the first part from what I know. I'll use Temple as an example. They claim they don't rank the waitlist, even though you know they do in some way. However, it is pretty much agreed upon that the applicants aren't numbered and they do not just go down the list. Most schools want to maintain a certain 'type' of class...say maybe have so many from in state, have a certain ballpark male:female ratio, try to have a certain number of minorities. So when someone withdraws, they likely look to have someone similar enter into the class (if an OOS girl withdraws, pick a new OOS girl, etc). Also, every waitlist letter I have states that 'some movement usually occurs before May 15, but the bulk is after'. This leads me to believe that they don't have a set day of May 15 to make offers- this is just when the majority of people withdraw, so that's when the majority are made. You can search old threads right here on SDN that support that numerous schools DO start seeing movement at the beginning/middle of May, although it isn't a ton. Once again, just using Temple as an example- they started pulling people from the list at the beginning of May either last year or the year before, since they had enough people withdraw by then to start utilizing the list.

 

[flip26]

I'll address the first part from what I know. I'll use Temple as an example. They claim they don't rank the waitlist, even though you know they do in some way. However, it is pretty much agreed upon that the applicants aren't numbered and they do not just go down the list. Most schools want to maintain a certain 'type' of class...say maybe have so many from in state, have a certain ballpark male:female ratio, try to have a certain number of minorities. So when someone withdraws, they likely look to have someone similar enter into the class (if an OOS girl withdraws, pick a new OOS girl, etc). Also, every waitlist letter I have states that 'some movement usually occurs before May 15, but the bulk is after'. This leads me to believe that they don't have a set day of May 15 to make offers- this is just when the majority of people withdraw, so that's when the majority are made. You can search old threads right here on SDN that support that numerous schools DO start seeing movement at the beginning/middle of May, although it isn't a ton. Once again, just using Temple as an example- they started pulling people from the list at the beginning of May either last year or the year before, since they had enough people withdraw by then to start utilizing the list.

You know, this will all be moot in less than 45 days...looking at past years' threads, very little waitilist movement anywhere occurs much before May 15...don't begrudge people who are simply exercising their options...

 

[illixir]

If you've paid a tuition deposit on the acceptance and are withdrawing, is e-mail all that's needed to get them to mail you another check refunding the deposit?

 

[bruinbadger]

Indeed, schools offer acceptances more than their capacity, meaning that they have already estimated how many accepted students would be matriculating based on their past data. Therefore, even if we let go of our acceptances, it won't make much difference to waitlisted people. Only after may 15, most schools begin to consider waitlisted students.