Feedback on this secondary essay?

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girlunobserved

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I'm just going to paste it here (this is for the is there anything you would like to tell us about your background - not really diversity but also somewhat)

I'm a bi-sexual Pakistani Muslim woman who loves to collect stories that I come across. The nature of who I am lets me meet people from all walks of life - from the mosque, from school, from volunteering, from Pakistan, from the United States, and from my commute. I've learned so much from these people, and each has influenced me in ways that words can only begin to express - but all have driven me to want to work for people in a field that I've always been interested in academically.

I only have 9 words left.

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