Funny Stuff at work that doesn't violate HIPAA.

[RussianJoo]

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So I recently heard some funny pt names and things that pt's do and I wanted to know what kind of stuff you guys hear at work.

Here's what goes on at my hospital. Some First names.. this guy named Ladash, spells his name LA-. One of my friends asked what happeneds if he wanted to take the SAT's there's no - as a choice for the name.


I've seen a newborn named Godsgift, I guess that's not so bad...


On of my friends told me that he got a call from a pharmacy for one of his scripts... apparently one of his pt's stole a script and wrote himself a script for IV morphine.. He wrote " Mofine, 1 gallon , 100 refills.

And of course everyone loves Delila...

I heard a few others like what their pt's call their diseases but I forgot them, I'll post more when I hear more...

 

[rabble]

I saw a couple Godsgifts on my peds rotation... they were actually a welcome change from all the Aaidens, Jaydens, Bradens, and Nevaehs. I've also heard the LA- and mofine stories before. With those I kind of wonder if they are legends that get passed around the country.

I also met a woman who showed me her hospital wristband and said "This ain't my name." She said the "y" in her name was supposed to have a horizontal line over it. I had to stop short of telling her that our wristband printer can't print letters that don't exist.

 

[RussianJoo]

I was recently doing GI consult month at the VA, one of my consults was a women in her 40's for rectal dilitation after she developed a stricture s/p some surgery... I part of my physical exam was a DRE, I told her that I'd be right back because I needed to go get some lube, she replied by telling to just spit on my fingers... At least she didn't wink at me.

 

[scudrunner]

This thread has great potential.

 

[Gern Blansten]

"My name is J.J. But it's spelled J.J.J. The third J is silent."

 

[WholeLottaGame7]

I saw a couple Godsgifts on my peds rotation... they were actually a welcome change from all the Aaidens, Jaydens, Bradens, and Nevaehs. I've also heard the LA- and mofine stories before. With those I kind of wonder if they are legends that get passed around the country.

I also met a woman who showed me her hospital wristband and said "This ain't my name." She said the "y" in her name was supposed to have a horizontal line over it. I had to stop short of telling her that our wristband printer can't print letters that don't exist.

I have also heard the La-a (Ladasha) story. Other great names: Man-o'-war, Sir T Wiggins, Oranjello/Lemonjello.

The "mofine" story cracked me up.

I currently have a post-CABG delirious patient in the SICU who will lie quietly and then should "GEORGE PATTON" at the top of his lungs.

 

[Arch Guillotti]

I have also heard the La-a (Ladasha) story. Other great names: Man-o'-war, Sir T Wiggins, Oranjello/Lemonjello.

The "mofine" story cracked me up.

I currently have a post-CABG delirious patient in the SICU who will lie quietly and then should "GEORGE PATTON" at the top of his lungs.

I always heard it was "mofeen" and it was always a pound. It's been heard enough that I think it is urban legend.

The jello children story has been going around for years as well.

 

[Mman]

had a middle aged patient last week with first name "Orange" and middle initial "J". I didn't have the heart to ask if his middle name was Julius. I did ask what his friends called him and got the straight faced reply "Orange".

 

[Intubate]

I had an Asian guy in the icu as a resident. His name was Phuc Yu (or maybe Yoo) Ho. He was fun to present to the attending.

 

[Green Chimneys]

Things that get me through intern year: Just admitted a lady from the ED the other day; CC: "I thought 20 units of Lantus would make the voices in my head go away."

Little did I know, this was actually 60 year old defunct "legitimate" medical therapy. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Insulin_shock_therapy

 

[GasEmDee]

Internship year in the ED of a large county hospital.

Two women in their early 20's arrive. CC: "We think we have scabies". I walk into the room, and they are frolicking with one another, giggling under the covers of the guerney in the room.

They insist that they have scabies and insist on showing it. One girl flings off her robe and does a stripper-model like twirl to reveal a 360 view of her perfect, natural body. 2nd girl follows suit.

That month almost made me switch into emergency medicine.

(No, they did not have scabies...or any other discernible skin condition)

 

[RussianJoo]

yeah I had a 20 y/o stripper as a pt during my trauma month. She flipped her car and broke her sacrum. so ortho did an ORIF of her Sacrum, I always said they did an ORIF of her butt. Her hip x-ray showed some osteopenia, the ortho guys were saying it's from rubbing on the stripper pole. lol

 

[loveumms]

senior ICU rotation - on our morning rounds one day the nurses tell us that our 80 yo patient s/p some GI procedure is becoming delirious and throwing objects such as incentive spirometers from his room.

Later that night, the intern got a frantic call from one of the nurses asking for haldol. Apparently, that guy had thrown a urinal from his room, spalshing urine all over the floor, walls and some unsuspecting nurse. I wanted to ask why on earth they would give this guy a urinal without very close supervision, he was known to throw things ...

 

[geogil]

If the first push pin disappears into your testicle without a trace, don't follow it with 3 more. If you persist, said organ will end up in the path lab.

 

[SFO-IST]

If the first push pin disappears into your testicle without a trace, don't follow it with 3 more. If you persist, said organ will end up in the path lab.

ouch... hey have they figured out why we experience physical pain when even just hearing about this sort of thing yet?

 

[Sam212]

.

 

[RussianJoo]

Had a lady who said she broke her esophosis... and best part is she's been getting disability for the last 20+ years because of that.

 

[HavanaGuy]

Once, during my ER rotation in internship I admitted a pt that was an alcoholic and was clearly cirrhotic and encephalopathic. After much explanations as to how sick he was and why, he said "you think if I cut back to just one six-pack a day i'll be fine?" My reply: If you only want to live another few months.....

 

[C.P.]

Lady in front of me goes livid when the barrista calls out the name "Shady Nasty!" "Large Mocha for . . . Shady Nasty!"

To which, her replay was: "it's mother F*$&ing Sha Dynasty! . . . . Sha Dynasty!"