How do you deal with people trying to discourage you?

[lady1]

So I used to tell that I was pre-med, dreaming of becoming of a physician.

But then I found out that family members and sister in laws tried to discourage me or were outright jealous...
My sister in law even told me ''ok..so you must think you are all that for trying to become a physician...I can do it too if I want to!''. I never even told her something, she heard it through my brother.
Another brother said '' I''m really glad that you are not considering med school any more, its really nothing for you, it's really hard work haha''.
Even though I have always been a driven person and was always there in times of need.

It's really sad to hear such comments.
I always had this idea that family should support you.. or at least not be directly insulting, discouraging.

How do you people deal with family/friends reacting negative upon you being pre-med?

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[TakotsuboOkazaki]

Be happy they are trying to discourage you.

It means they know you CAN do it AND you have to drive to.

They know they CAN’T.

So they will try to hold you back to feel better about themselves.

Sibling competition.

If you like medicine then by ALL MEANS become a doctor.


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[LoveBeingHuman:)]

Back fire on them. Hard.

 

[LnSin]

Haters = motivators


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[HomeSkool]

As I am wont to do, I shall respond with multiple quotes:

So I used to tell that I was pre-med, dreaming of becoming of a physician.

But then I found out that family members, sister in laws tried to discourage me were outright jealous...

Have you changed your mind about going into medicine, then?

My sister in law even told me ''ok..so you must think you are all that for trying to become a physician...I can do it too if I want to!''.

Great! So what? I fail to see how this is a put-down. Even if she could do it, how would that make it any less admirable a goal?

I never even told her something, she heard it through my brother.

From now on, go ahead and assume that anything you tell one of them will be transmitted to the other.

Another brother said '' I''m really glad that you are not considering med school any more, its really nothing for you, it's really hard work haha''.

Is he correct about you not considering med school anymore? I doubt it, since you're posting on SDN. He's right about it being really hard work. But you get to decide whether he's right about it not being for you.

Even though I have always been a driven person and was always there in times of need.

Don't let the pettiness of others dictate how charitable you are, but remember that being charitable does not mean being their doormat. You don't need to associate with toxic people, even family members. And you can tell them you're limiting your contact because of their toxicity. That doesn't lower you to their level, it tells them why you're building walls and a moat.

It's really sad to hear such comments.
I always had this idea that family should support you.. or at least not be directly insulting, discouraging.

It's always disappointing when friends or family decide to discourage the best in someone. But they're free to choose that path, just as you're free to fire them -- even if they are family.

How do you people deal with family/friends reacting negative upon you being pre-med?

I was fortunate enough to have a very supportive family. I did have some acquaintances who tried to convince me that med school was impossibly hard. My attitude was always, "Well, someone manages to get through it. Why can't that be me?"

Keep your eyes on the prize.

 

[mistafab]

Best thing to do is not do anything. Their biases/motives are not within your sphere of control.

 

[Catalystik]

How do you people deal with family/friends reacting negative upon you being pre-med?

From now on, refrain from mentioning your specific future plans. Look forward to their surprise when you present a fait accompli.

 

[Catalystik]

Haters = motivators

It worked for me!!!

 

[lady1]

As I am wont to do, I shall respond with multiple quotes:

Have you changed your mind about going into medicine, then?

Great! So what? I fail to see how this is a put-down. Even if she could do it, how would that make it any less admirable a goal?

Is he correct about you not considering med school anymore? I doubt it, since you're posting on SDN. He's right about it being really hard work. But you get to decide whether he's right about it not being for you.

.

Hi, Thank you.
And thanks to the other people that responded: If I could have tagged you, I would 🙂.

Of course they are not right. I never changed my mind about going for medicine.
I just stopped telling them and changed my story (telling them Im not going for it anymore).

It's the only way I could get my peace of mind back.
Every time they'd see me they would ask me all sort of questions..sooooo what did you do, people dont make it through rotations, how are u going to deal financially, do you really think its a good idea, its not such a great profession you know, even telling people I never met (but then would see on their birthdays) etc etc. In all trying to give me a feeling of my plan being undoable.

You're right. Lately I really start to think that I have toxic family members.
I've always been a supporting family member, but I feel that I only get the negative back.

 

[lady1]

From now on, refrain from mentioning your specific future plans. Look forward to their surprise when you present a fait accompli.

I so hope I get in!

 

[Catalystik]

I so hope I get in!

The joy on their faces will be even brighter if they think you've been entertaining the career plan of, say, pole dancing, street musician, or [fill in the blank with another job without benefits].

 

[lady1]

The joy on their faces will be even brighter if they think you've been entertaining the career plan of, say, pole dancing, street musician, or [fill in the blank with another job without benefits].

Haha, that's a good joke 🙂

 

[Goro]

So I used to tell that I was pre-med, dreaming of becoming of a physician.

But then I found out that family members and sister in laws tried to discourage me or were outright jealous...
My sister in law even told me ''ok..so you must think you are all that for trying to become a physician...I can do it too if I want to!''. I never even told her something, she heard it through my brother.
Another brother said '' I''m really glad that you are not considering med school any more, its really nothing for you, it's really hard work haha''.
Even though I have always been a driven person and was always there in times of need.

It's really sad to hear such comments.
I always had this idea that family should support you.. or at least not be directly insulting, discouraging.

How do you people deal with family/friends reacting negative upon you being pre-med?

I was going to write something inspirational, but then the wise HomeSkool beat me too it. Waiting for SDN's nicest poster, @Doctor-S, to finish the job!

OP, you do you, and **** those people trying to sabotage your career out of pettiness, jealousy, and other toxicities!

 

[OrthoTraumaMD]

and then, when you get in, suddenly they will be calling you with their "medical issues." and that's when you drop the bomb and go, sorry guys, see your PCP.

 

[lady1]

I was going to write something inspirational, but then the wise HomeSkool beat me too it. Waiting for SDN's nicest poster, @Doctor-S, to finish the job!

OP, you do you, and **** those people trying to sabotage your career out of pettiness, jealousy, and other toxicities!

Ty!
Everyone has something special to add, and that will be very much appreciated by me 🙂

 

[HomeSkool]

Hi, Thank you.
And thanks to the other people that responded: If I could have tagged you, I would 🙂.

Of course they are not right. I never changed my mind about going for medicine.
I just stopped telling them and changed my story (telling them Im not going for it anymore).

It's the only way I could get my peace of mind back.
Every time they'd see me they would ask me all sort of questions..sooooo what did you do, people dont make it through rotations, how are u going to deal financially, do you really think its a good idea, its not such a great profession you know, even telling people I never met (but then would see on their birthdays) etc etc.

You're right. Lately I really start to think that I have toxic family members.
I've always been a supporting family member, but I feel that I only get the negative back.

Don't lie to them, just tell them it's your concern and not theirs.

Responses to discouraging statements:
1. "People don't make it through rotations." -> The vast majority do.
2. "How are you going to pay for it?" -> Loans. That's the way nearly everyone plays this game.
3. "Do you really think it's a good idea?" -> Yes.
4. "It's not such a great profession." -> Totally subjective statement with no basis in verifiable fact. One could just as easily assert that trolling family members isn't such a great profession.

There's something important that you need to remember (actually, that we all need to remember): nothing you do can ever increase or decrease your intrinsic worth as a human being. As a human being (and, in my belief, as a child of God), your intrinsic worth is infinite. No accomplishment can increase it, no failure can decrease it. If you peg your sense of self-worth to your academic and professional success, you'll be miserable. If you peg it to the words and actions of others, you'll be miserable. I'm not saying that you should be ambivalent to success or beyond reproach. I'm saying that you need to be OK and stable in your own skin, and then you can be untouchable by the misguided words of others.

 

[Catalystik]

and then, when you get in, suddenly they will be calling you with their "medical issues." and that's when you drop the bomb and go, sorry guys, see your PCP.

I did that and the response was, "Well, what good are you anyway." It never ends, but it does stop bothering you.

 

[HomeSkool]

and then, when you get in, suddenly they will be calling you with their "medical issues." and that's when you drop the bomb and go, sorry guys, see your PCP.

Also: when they hit you up for funding, you're under no obligation whatsoever to accommodate. Offering to drop them off at the soup kitchen instead of buying them a steak dinner doesn't make you a bad or ungrateful person. You're not their doormat or their ATM.

 

[lady1]

Don't lie to them, just tell them it's your concern and not theirs.
There's something important that you need to remember (actually, that we all need to remember): nothing you do can ever increase or decrease your intrinsic worth as a human being. As a human being (and, in my belief, as a child of God), your intrinsic worth is infinite. No accomplishment can increase it, no failure can decrease it. If you peg your sense of self-worth to your academic and professional success, you'll be miserable. If you peg it to the words and actions of others, you'll be miserable. I'm not saying that you should be ambivalent to success or beyond reproach. I'm saying that you need to be OK and stable in your own skin, and then you can be untouchable by the misguided words of others.

In the beginning I would respond in that matter. Responding to questions in a polite, heartfelt matter.
But it was like giving them more space to have a say, negative opinion.. like they were worth an argument.
I also believe that their words can't increase or devalue my worth. After all these years I know who I am and what I can do..I also have had my hardships in life.

I just had too much of the questions, they were just being noisy..not out of interest or care.
Because when I was sick nobody cared about that.
Now that they don't know, I feel at ease..and it makes me sad because I just feel I don't have the family like some people do. I have to play dumb for them to accept me.
(Even though my brothers/SIL are subtly encouraging their own childrn for the medical field) !

 

[HomeSkool]

In the beginning I would respond in that matter. Responding to questions in a polite, heartfelt matter.
But it was like giving them more space to have a say, negative opinion.. like they were worth an argument.
I also believe that their words can't increase or devalue my worth. After all these years I know who I am and what I can do..I also have had my hardships in life.

I just had too much of the questions, they were just being noisy..not out of interest or care.
Because when I was sick nobody cared about that.
Now that they don't know, I feel at ease..and it makes me sad because I just feel I don't have the family like some people do. I have to play dumb for them to accept me.

I'm sorry it's been that way for you. Best thing to do going forward is to fill your life with those who encourage and support you.

 

[lady1]

-

 

[Catalystik]

it makes me sad because I just feel I don't have the family like some people do. I have to play dumb for them to accept me.

You have friends who accept you, surely. It's OK to create a new family from among those who support and encourage you.

 

[lady1]

I'm sorry it's been that way for you. Best thing to do going forward is to fill your life with those who encourage and support you.

You have friends who accept you, surely. It's OK to create a new family from among those who support and encourage you.

Thanks 🙂

 

[HomeSkool]

You have friends who accept you, surely. It's OK to create a new family from among those who support and encourage you.

You wouldn't be the first to do it.

 

[calivianya]

I was very fortunate that I didn't actually have anyone discouraging me while I was applying. Everyone told me they knew I could do it, and they were super excited for me, even my coworkers. It got emotionally dicey for me when I got my first rejection, from my top choice school post-interview, but everyone else was still positive.

My work supervisor actually sent out an email to the whole department and posted an announcement by the time clock about me getting into med school after I told her I got my first acceptance (DO). I've had more congratulations than I know what to deal with. Apparently, my department has only had one other RN go to medical school instead of NP/CRNA school, and the last person to do it was employed as a RN greater than 20 years ago. Sometimes I think my coworkers are almost more excited than I am.


...Except for one coworker, who has had many conversations with me since and not once said anything about me getting into school, and has made nothing but snide comments about anything related to me he possibly can any time we interact. He has a CT surgeon for a father who he says is famous for pioneering some technique. I'm chalking his behavior up to jealousy and feeling like his superiority is threatened. I just kill him with politeness, smile a lot, and don't go out of my way to interact with him much.

 

[RaspberrySlushy]

Living well (in this case, getting in and getting through and becoming a physician) is usually the best revenge.

 

[Mad Jack]

So I used to tell that I was pre-med, dreaming of becoming of a physician.

But then I found out that family members and sister in laws tried to discourage me or were outright jealous...
My sister in law even told me ''ok..so you must think you are all that for trying to become a physician...I can do it too if I want to!''. I never even told her something, she heard it through my brother.
Another brother said '' I''m really glad that you are not considering med school any more, its really nothing for you, it's really hard work haha''.
Even though I have always been a driven person and was always there in times of need.

It's really sad to hear such comments.
I always had this idea that family should support you.. or at least not be directly insulting, discouraging.

How do you people deal with family/friends reacting negative upon you being pre-med?

Don't say a word to them about it until you matriculate

 

[BOAO523]

I agree with MadJack. Don't say anything to them until you're accepted or matriculate.

Furthermore, you should take all that discouragement and store it in the proverbial "chip on your shoulder". You should then allow that chip to carry you to, through medical school, and far beyond your (and their) wildest dreams.

 

[lady1]

I agree with MadJack. Don't say anything to them until you're accepted or matriculate.

Furthermore, you should take all that discouragement and store it in the proverbial "chip on your shoulder". You should then allow that chip to carry you to, through medical school, and far beyond your (and their) wildest dreams.

Yea, Its been some time now that I became quite.
Its pains me to mostly have myself say that I can do it sometimes..
But it's much better than useless negativity.

 

[chemdoctor]

and then, when you get in, suddenly they will be calling you with their "medical issues." and that's when you drop the bomb and go, sorry guys, see your PCP.

Ahh revenge, vindictiveness. My favorites!

 

[RaspberrySlushy]

I was very fortunate that I didn't actually have anyone discouraging me while I was applying. Everyone told me they knew I could do it, and they were super excited for me, even my coworkers. It got emotionally dicey for me when I got my first rejection, from my top choice school post-interview, but everyone else was still positive.

My work supervisor actually sent out an email to the whole department and posted an announcement by the time clock about me getting into med school after I told her I got my first acceptance (DO). I've had more congratulations than I know what to deal with.


...Except for one coworker, who has had many conversations with me since and not once said anything about me getting into school, and has made nothing but snide comments about anything related to me he possibly can any time we interact. I am interpreting his behavior as jealousy. He has a CT surgeon for a father who he says is famous for pioneering some technique... I don't know anything about this and haven't done any fact checking. I'm chalking it up to jealousy and him feeling like his superiority is threatened. I just kill him with politeness, smile a lot, and don't go out of my way to interact with him.

I completely relate to this. My boss has been amazing (and so accommodating of my interview trips). We had a meeting the day after my first (so far only lol) acceptance and she brought donuts and a gift. Everyone at work has been great.

But there is that one coworker guy who likes to make snide remarks. He’s always saying how unlikely it is for me to get in. When I got my first pre-II rejection (Mayo AZ), he seemed downright elated and kept telling me I would also get the same from MN. Some mean-spirited part of me was really happy that the next time he came to work, I was in the middle of booking my trip to MN and got to prove him wrong (still the first thing he said when he found out where I was going was, “I’m sure it’s not for Mayo”).

He continues to make snide comments on the regs, as if I will never get in anywhere. Of course out of all my coworkers this is the one I share a cubicle with, and honestly this stuff is the least of his annoying behaviors. I don’t really get why he’s so invested, sometimes he even looks up schools I’ve applied to for no reason other than to tell me I won’t get in. This guy isn’t/never was interested in medicine so I’m not sure where it comes from but feels really petty.

Mostly I try to ignore him and not discuss the process with him (which dies get tricky with our boss being so invested in a positive way), even if I’m doing app-related stuff during downtime at work. Like you, I try to take the kill with kindness approach to dealing with him in general. Ultimately, if he wants to spend so much time on negativity, he can keep it to himself. It doesn’t bother me so much anymore but it did at first because we used to be close friends and this (among other things) has put a damper on that.

 

[lady1]

I completely relate to this. My boss has been amazing (and so accommodating of my interview trips). We had a meeting the day after my first (so far only lol) acceptance and she brought donuts and a gift. Everyone at work has been great.

I was very fortunate that I didn't actually have anyone discouraging me while I was applying. Everyone told me they knew I could do it, and they were super excited for me, even my coworkers. It got emotionally dicey for me when I got my first rejection, from my top choice school post-interview, but everyone else was still positive.

Thanks for sharing 🙂
Of course killing with kindness is also my mantra.
When it's family, a brother or their wives..it's a bit harder. Or maby I just experience it this way.
I was planning to spend the holidays with them..but I just don't feel comfortable being around them anymore.

 

[DokterMom]

and then, when you get in, suddenly they will be calling you with their "medical issues." and that's when you drop the bomb and go, sorry guys, see your PCP.

Beat me to it! -- I was going to say:

"Well at least I won't have to worry about you asking me for free medical advice!"

 

[RaspberrySlushy]

Thanks for sharing 🙂
Of course killing with kindness is also my mantra.
When it's family, a brother or their wives..it's a bit harder. Or maby I just experience it this way.
I was planning to spend the holidays with them..but I just don't feel comfortable being around them anymore.

Yes, I think it’s definitely harder when it’s a family member vs a coworker or friend. I hope they will come around. Sometimes, not always, maybe not often, people do.

 

[infectiousdisease101]

It depends on why they are doing it. I once told a guy he shouldn't be a doctor because he was taking shortcuts and once told me "I don't want to learn I just want an A to get my gpa up." But I doubt that applies to you.

I'm going to assume you're a woman based on your username. Women facing discrimination in science and medicine is nothing new. People are still in the mindset women should be stay at home moms. I believe we need more women who are focused on their careers rather than having kids. I want a career wife and only plan to have 1 kid, 2 at the most. Career women is one of the leading solutions to overpopulation. Can't have babies if you're busy focusing on your career. Just blast them with a truth bomb: if we had more women focusing on their careers, this planet wouldn't be so overpopulated. It'll shut them up.

 

[lady1]

It depends on why they are doing it. I once told a guy he shouldn't be a doctor because he was taking shortcuts and once told me "I don't want to learn I just want an A to get my gpa up." But I doubt that applies to you.

I'm going to assume you're a woman based on your username. Women facing discrimination in science and medicine is nothing new. People are still in the mindset women should be stay at home moms. I believe we need more women who are focused on their careers rather than having kids. I want a career wife and only plan to have 1 kid, 2 at the most. Career women is one of the leading solutions to overpopulation. Can't have babies if you're busy focusing on your career. Just blast them with a truth bomb: if we had more women focusing on their careers, this planet wouldn't be so overpopulated. It'll shut them up.

Don't worry, I'm in it for the right reasons 🙂
Plus I'm already 26 years old.
Of course I'd like to meet someone eventually, but to be frank I don't dream about having childrn.
Maby I've just seen how unloving (my own/ other peoples) family can be and the idea doesn't appeal to me.

 

[Doctor-S]

It's too bad we can't choose our own relatives. However, we can't and it is what it is. Not everyone is going to approve of us, or like us, or encourage us, or be supportive of us.

Kindly try to break the negative cycle, by being a kinder person to others as you move forward in your own life and in your own medical career. It's okay to be you. 🙂

 

[Goro]

Report him to your boss and HR for creating a hostile work environment. I'm dead serious.

I completely relate to this. My boss has been amazing (and so accommodating of my interview trips). We had a meeting the day after my first (so far only lol) acceptance and she brought donuts and a gift. Everyone at work has been great.

But there is that one coworker guy who likes to make snide remarks. He’s always saying how unlikely it is for me to get in. When I got my first pre-II rejection (Mayo AZ), he seemed downright elated and kept telling me I would also get the same from MN. Some mean-spirited part of me was really happy that the next time he came to work, I was in the middle of booking my trip to MN and got to prove him wrong (still the first thing he said when he found out where I was going was, “I’m sure it’s not for Mayo”).

He continues to make snide comments on the regs, as if I will never get in anywhere. Of course out of all my coworkers this is the one I share a cubicle with, and honestly this stuff is the least of his annoying behaviors. I don’t really get why he’s so invested, sometimes he even looks up schools I’ve applied to for no reason other than to tell me I won’t get in. This guy isn’t/never was interested in medicine so I’m not sure where it comes from but feels really petty.

Mostly I try to ignore him and not discuss the process with him (which dies get tricky with our boss being so invested in a positive way), even if I’m doing app-related stuff during downtime at work. Like you, I try to take the kill with kindness approach to dealing with him in general. Ultimately, if he wants to spend so much time on negativity, he can keep it to himself. It doesn’t bother me so much anymore but it did at first because we used to be close friends and this (among other things) has put a damper on that.

 

[Lucca]

I vent my feelings to my good friend @NotASerialKiller and it’s like all of my problems just go away

 

[Gilakend]

I hate when people say "Well I COULD do that" about anything. Of course you could, anyone could. Just like anyone COULD workout and get shredded to the gills. But going around saying "Yeah, I could look like Sylvester Stallone in Rocky 4, if I wanted to." doesn't make you any more jacked.

 

[jhamaican]

Don't let the haters get you down.

I was held back a year in 3rd grade because they felt my english skills were not up to par.

My neighbor felt the need to go out of her way one day to tell me I would never become a doctor because I wasn't smart enough (Why she would feel the need to say this is beyond me, frankly bizarre)

I am now about to start one of the most competitive fellowships in medicine at a "top tier" program next year.

Let the haters hate and just keep pushing. No whining. No surrender. Just do it!

 

[lady1]

I hate when people say "Well I COULD do that" about anything. Of course you could, anyone could. Just like anyone COULD workout and get shredded to the gills. But going around saying "Yeah, I could look like Sylvester Stallone in Rocky 4, if I wanted to." doesn't make you any more jacked.

It was just a strange comment. I had bought her a gift that day and I never said that she couldn't do anything she wanted to do in life.
She even shook my shoulder saying (You really think you're all that, I can do medicine too, you know!) in a angry matter.
My brother told her that I wanted to do medicine.
She came from another country and I just think its jealousy, envy.
In her country dr's are admired.
Whatever anyway.. can't fix someones mind.

 

[lady1]

Don't let the haters get you down.

I was held back a year in 3rd grade because they felt my english skills were not up to par.

My neighbor felt the need to go out of her way to tell me I would never become a doctor because I wasn't smart enough (Why she would say this or even know my intelligence is bizarre)

I am now about to start one of the most competitive fellowships in medicine at a "top tier" program next year.

Let the haters hate and just keep pushing. No whining. No surrender. Just do it!

Yea..in high school I heard it also from a teacher that medicine is a hard life..I must say it influenced me, I was young and didn't have much examples of people studying.
Even the negative comments from family influenced meup untill now.
But I have a master degree now, am older and have regained my self confidence.
This time I don't listen to anyone anymore trying to bring me down.

I visited my parents today.
My brother was there, telling me that her wife had every right to do what she did. (see my last comment)
Even my father said that I should just get on with my life and don't chase dreams that can't be fulfilled.

I packed my bags, told them that I'm not coming around anymore.
Arrived at my own appartment, crying.

I just can't believe it.

 

[jhamaican]

Yea..in high school I heard it also from a teacher that medicine is a hard life..I must say it influenced me, I was young and didn't have much examples of people studying.
Even the negative comments from family influenced meup untill now.
But I have a master degree now, am older and have regained my self confidence.
This time I don't listen to anyone anymore trying to bring me down.

I visited my parents today.
My brother was there, telling me that her wife had every right to do what she did. (see my last comment)
Even my father said that I should just get on with my life and don't chase dreams that can't be fulfilled.

I packed my bags, told them that I'm not coming around anymore.
Arrived at my own appartment, crying.

I just can believe it.

particularly disappointing when it comes from your own family

The hope is for your children to reach the heights that you were unable to.

Same principle however. I hope you prove everyone wrong and succeed!

 

[lady1]

particularly disappointing when it comes from your own family

The hope is for your children to reach the heights that you were unable to.

Same principle however. I hope you prove everyone wrong and succeed!

Thank you.. no kids yet, I'm 26.
But yes I would do it much different 🙂

 

[thestudiousmeathead]

OP: Here's what you do.

Don't tell anyone when you apply, interview, or get accepted.
Graduate top of class, match plastics, buy helicopter once making attending cosmetic surgeon money.
Proceed to land your helicopter in doubting relatives' lawn, shout "gaze upon me now, peasants!" and fly away.

In all seriousness, as a non-trad/former college dropout that got in facing strong odds, if you want to do this you can. The choice is yours.

 

[Goro]

Yea..in high school I heard it also from a teacher that medicine is a hard life..I must say it influenced me, I was young and didn't have much examples of people studying.
Even the negative comments from family influenced meup untill now.
But I have a master degree now, am older and have regained my self confidence.
This time I don't listen to anyone anymore trying to bring me down.

I visited my parents today.
My brother was there, telling me that her wife had every right to do what she did. (see my last comment)
Even my father said that I should just get on with my life and don't chase dreams that can't be fulfilled.

I packed my bags, told them that I'm not coming around anymore.
Arrived at my own appartment, crying.

I just can't believe it.

Very sorry to hear this, but we're rooting for you here.
I'm estranged from my oldest sister, who refused to come to my wedding, and ignored the fact that the arrival of my two kids made her an imo (aunt). I haven't spoken to her in 20 years.

Now, my wife's best friend I consider to be my sister-in-law, and her daughter is "cousin" to my kids.

Family is really who you make it, and not just people you share genes with.

 

[lady1]

OP: Here's what you do.

Don't tell anyone when you apply, interview, or get accepted.
Graduate top of class, match plastics, buy helicopter once making attending cosmetic surgeon money.
Proceed to land your helicopter in doubting relatives' lawn, shout "gaze upon me now, peasants!" and fly away.

In all seriousness, as a non-trad/former college dropout that got in facing strong odds, if you want to do this you can. The choice is yours.

Haha, you're funny
Thanks for the kinds words 🙂

 

[lady1]

Very sorry to hear this, but we're rooting for you here.
I'm estranged from my oldest sister, who refused to come to my wedding, and ignored the fact that the arrival of my two kids made her an imo (aunt). I haven't spoken to her in 20 years.

Now, my wife's best friend I consider to be my sister-in-law, and her daughter is "cousin" to my kids.

Family is really who you make it, and not just people you share genes with.

I'm sorry to hear that..but I'm glad that you managed to find other people that care (more). 🙂

Yea..I had my doubts about my family for a while now..
Everytime I visited I never felt good about myself, would get stressed and they only appreciate the quiet, passive me.
I felt better meeting strangers. older people would speak highly of me..about how caring I am, how open, could make them feel at ease and understand a lot of things about the happiness and hardships of life.

I can't remember the last time family said something nice to me..but I do remember when they made me cry..(today)

 

[OrthoTraumaMD]

I'm sorry to hear that..but I'm glad that you managed to find other people that care (more). 🙂

Yea..I had my doubts about my family for a while now..
Everytime I visited I never felt good about myself, would get stressed and they only appreciate the quiet, passive me.
I felt better meeting strangers. older people would speak highly of me..about how caring I am, how open, could make them feel at ease and understand a lot of things about the happiness and hardships of life.

I can't remember the last time family said something nice to me..but I do remember when they made me cry..(today)

That sounds terrible. Drop them like it's hot if they are toxic. Your brother's wife sounds like an insecure b****!


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