Okay, for hydrolysis, it's a 2-step process.
The first step is the attack of the nucleophile (in this case OH) to the carbonyl, kicking one of the C=O bonds to the oxygen (creating a negatively charged oxygen). This step is reversible, as the lone pair can just kick out the nucleophile, and we're back to the beginning. In this step, you can argue for the polarity of the bond, and which groups activate the Carbonyl C the greatest. But ... it's reversible, so it does not carry much weight in the overall reaction as the second step...
The second step, is a lone pair on the negatively charged oxygen will regain the double bond, thereby kicking out the leaving group. This is the RATE DETERMINING STEP. This is why the LEAVING group is important in hydrolysis.
This was the point I was trying to get across. He's paying attention to the first step, while I was paying attention to the second step. I wanted for him to see it, but I guess he stopped replying.
To answer your question about the amide being less reactive than a ketone during hydrolysis, have you ever seen a methyl group leaving after being attacked by a hydroxyl ion? You won't because after nucleophilic attack with the hydroxyl group, when the negative charged oxygen wants to regain the double bond, it will kick out the hydroxyl group rather than the methyl group. Why? Because hydroxyl ions are MORE stable conjugated bases than the CH3-.