Interviews: The baby question

[LadyJubilee8_18]

I went to a TMDSAS meeting today at U of H and the host mentioned that medical schools often ask students (especially female students) weather or not they want to have kinds. If the answer to this question is “yes” they want to know how you will balance your familial obligations with your career. I understand that med schools would rather students who will not have families, so what is the right answer to this question. I am tempted to just give a joke answer like, “Well, being a med student will be convenient because I will already be working at a hospital! I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

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[getunconcsious]

I went to a TMDSAS meeting today at U of H and the host mentioned that medical schools often ask students (especially female students) weather or not they want to have kinds. If the answer to this question is “yes” they want to know how you will balance your familial obligations with your career. I understand that med schools would rather students who will not have families, so what is the right answer to this question. I am tempted to just give a joke answer like, “Well, being a med student will be convenient because I will already be working at a hospital! I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

People who want to have kids, a family, or a life at all don't belong in medicine! Dammit, why can't you leave this field to those of us that have no reason to get out of bed in the morning except to claw our way up the fascist hierarchy?!

Just kidding. I think the best way around it might be a vapid, vague answer like say that you don't know if you want to have kids yet, but that if you did, you'd pick a specialty and shape your career so as to accommodate both children and your career.

You might get the best advice from people that already had kids when they applied, I'm sure they really got grilled about this.

 

[blue2000]

I went to a TMDSAS meeting today at U of H and the host mentioned that medical schools often ask students (especially female students) weather or not they want to have kinds. If the answer to this question is “yes” they want to know how you will balance your familial obligations with your career. I understand that med schools would rather students who will not have families, so what is the right answer to this question. I am tempted to just give a joke answer like, “Well, being a med student will be convenient because I will already be working at a hospital! I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

Your assumption that med schools don't want their students to have families is fallacious. It's a question that is attempting to get if you've really thought about the demands and sacrificies that are necessary to become a doctor. If a school or interviewer gives you crap about having babies, I would think seriously about that school.

 

[Obedeli]

I went to a TMDSAS meeting today at U of H and the host mentioned that medical schools often ask students (especially female students) weather or not they want to have kinds. If the answer to this question is “yes” they want to know how you will balance your familial obligations with your career. I understand that med schools would rather students who will not have families, so what is the right answer to this question. I am tempted to just give a joke answer like, “Well, being a med student will be convenient because I will already be working at a hospital! I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

This is bullcrap and an ILLEGAL question! I don't know who you would contact but you can tell them politely this is none of their business. Seriously, that is SERIOUS BS!

 

[relema]

At one of my interviews my interviewer told me all about her kids and how she had them when she was in school and that she was very glad she had kids. So no I don't think that all schools look down on it.

 

[lorelei]

I haven't actually encountered this question, but would probably respond with something like "many of the physicians who have served as role models to me have families and have been able to use a combination of good time management, support systems, and paid help such as day care and housekeeping to maintain a satisfactory balance in which they can contribute admirably to both medicine and their families. I think being a doctor and being a parent will both be fulfilling, and judging from the success of my role models, I don't expect the two to be mutually exclusive."

What I would be tempted to say is "I'll manage it the same way men do." I think this question is a good one for potential physicians to think about, and quite possibly relevant in an interview, as long as it's aimed at both genders. Asking it primarily of women is pretty offensive - other than the fact that physically, I'm going to have to take some time off work to actually have the baby, there's no reason that the way I manage a family is going to be any different than the way thousands of male physicians have managed it.

 

[Laelia]

I think that if you answer this question in a thoughtful way, it can't hurt you. Each person has his/her own priorities. I mentioned in multiple secondaries my desire to have children and that I realize that that will require a lot of planning and some sacrifice and limiting of career options - I got interviews at the top schools, so I don't think this damaged me, and it may even have helped. I feel that forward-thinking shows that you are not being blindly naive, and that you have truly considered the implications of a career in medicine. Your answer to this question should be HONEST first and foremost... I figured that if a school didn't want me because of my family priorities, then I don't want to go there.

Hope this helped - good luck!!

 

[Brain]

I went to a TMDSAS meeting today at U of H and the host mentioned that medical schools often ask students (especially female students) weather or not they want to have kinds. If the answer to this question is “yes” they want to know how you will balance your familial obligations with your career. I understand that med schools would rather students who will not have families, so what is the right answer to this question. I am tempted to just give a joke answer like, “Well, being a med student will be convenient because I will already be working at a hospital! I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

I got that question at several TX schools and it really really pissed me off. I hate kids and don't want them but I should not be forced to explain why I don't in a professional school interview. Did anyone at this meeting mention that this is an inappropriate, if not illegal, question?

 

[prana_md]

This is bullcrap and an ILLEGAL question! I don't know who you would contact but you can tell them politely this is none of their business. Seriously, that is SERIOUS BS!

I second that. I researched this before interviews because I am almost 30 and I anticipated that this might come up. It is ABSOLUTELY ILLEGAL to ask!!! Thakfully, no one was awful enough to ask, but I decided to say that I'd been focused on school, and hadn't made a decision one way or another.

 

[getunconcsious]

Everyone who's saying it's an illegal question is right, but these are the TEXAS schools we're talking about here. They don't care and they'll ask you illegal questions all day, and there's nothing you can do about it except anticipate how you'll answer. One Texas school that I won't mention here pretty much told me that I wouldn't fit in there b/c I'm gay. The Texas schools WILL ask you inappropriate questions, and you'll just have to deal with it. No wonder it was a TMDSAS person that told you to go ahead and anticipate the question!

 

[Brain]

Is this question really illegal though? I know for a job interview it is. However, a med school interview is not a job interview. However, I do still think it is an inappropriate question.

 

[USCTex]

Whoops. I take my entire post back.

 

[thirdunity]

Since this question seems to get asked mostly of women, will these interviewers look down on me (being a woman) if I tell them that I DON'T want kids? Given that there are a lot of people out there who think having kids is my job, or something.

 

[Megalofyia]

Since this question seems to get asked mostly of women, will these interviewers look down on me (being a woman) if I tell them that I DON'T want kids? Given that there are a lot of people out there who think having kids is my job, or something.

Well they really shouldn't be asking you this question to start with in the first place. But *I* think what they are looking for is someone who's gonna be commited to medicine.. Not someone who's gonna get married in med school or shortly after and then leave medicine to raise a family.


Now that being said.. I never got asked this question.. and I made it very clear in my application that I like children. (Not my own though) I only interviewed at one Texas school and I didn't get asked it at that school but I also had some pretty cool interviewers at that school. Over all I still want to spit on that school but that's another issue.

The only school that asked me an illegal question was BU and really hindsight is 20/20 and I should have gone straight to the dean after it happened but I was too concerned with not offending anyone and hurting my chances. :-/

 

[jpro]

...meeting today at U of H...

UH baby
Sorry I really have nothing to add here.

 

[SmartAlek]

One of my classmates was asked this question and she was totally honest. She told the interviewer--who was a woman--that having a family was very important to her and that she planned to begin a family before the age of 30. (She was 21 at the time). The interviewer told her about her own daughter who had no children and was the top md/phd and that was because she could totally focus on her career and then asked my classmate how she planned to be an exceptional doctor. The girl replied that being a great doctor was important to her but so was being a great mother and that she would not compromise anything that would prevent her from being a great spouse and parent. They continued the interview, talking about various other things. Towards the end of the interview the interviewer told the girl that she really admired her for taking a stand for what she wanted to have. The interviewer then admitted that she was worried about her daughter because although she was successful, she was always alone and had nothing else outside of her career because she was in a different city than her mother.

From this I took away that you should not be ashamed of who you are and that you dont have to let go of your desires for the approval of adcoms.

 

[Obedeli]

I hate kids and don't want them but I should not be forced to explain why I don't in a professional school interview.

Now I don't want to make a big issue of this but why is the word "hate" acceptable in its use for kids. Could you imagine if you said "I hate*insert ethnic group*" ? You would probably be escorted off of the site. Yet, the word "hate" is used indiscriminately against conservatives, christians, now.... kids. This offends me because I have two darling little girls and I can't believe someone can say they hate them without even meeting them or knowing them. And others don't even blink their eye reading that poison. If you met them, I sure you couldn't hate them. There are enough people out there that truly hate children and are willing to do aweful things to them. The last place hatred for kids should be found is in the medical profession.
Basically, I feel the same pains someone would feel thinking about their black or hispanic friends if someone said they hated them. Now don't tell me that some of your best friends are kids
I understand you truly don't "hate" kids. That is, you wouldn't be perfectly happy with killing them and wishing they weren't around (that is what I think "hate" means). I assume you just don't want or like kids. I do NOT think there is anything wrong with that. I just sit and read these message boards and I have noticed that there are groups that are acceptable to claim hatred for without anyone even batting an eye. Yet if you are against AA forget it, you are full of "hate." Hate is a strong word.

Back to the orginal thread...

 

[Stitch626]

Now I don't want to make a big issue of this but why is the word "hate" acceptable in its use for kids. Could you imagine if you said "I hate*insert ethnic group*" ? You would probably be escorted off of the site. Yet, the word "hate" is used indiscriminately against conservatives, christians, now.... kids. This offends me because I have two darling little girls and I can't believe someone can say they hate them without even meeting them or knowing them. And others don't even blink their eye reading that poison. If you met them, I sure you couldn't hate them. There are enough people out there that truly hate children and are willing to do aweful things to them. The last place hatred for kids should be found is in the medical profession.
Basically, I feel the same pains someone would feel thinking about their black or hispanic friends if someone said they hated them. Now don't tell me that some of your best friends are kids
I understand you truly don't "hate" kids. That is, you would be perfectly happy with killing them and wishing they weren't around (that is what I think "hate" means). I assume you just don't want or like kids. I do NOT think there is anything wrong with that. I just sit and read these message boards and I have noticed that there are groups that are acceptable to claim hatred for.

Back to the orginal thread...

Oh no...I see a flame war starting.

On another note, I'm not really understanding what the term "illegal question" connotes in this situation. More specifically, what defines an "illegal question" and what are the possible ramifications of asking an "illegal question"? Get sued by the ACLU? I'm just trying to clear this up because everyone throws this term around, yet there still seems to be much ambiguity surrounding the topic.

And stop the hating on Texas schools!

 

[LizzyM]

I think it is safe to say, without having the statistics to back it up, that most physicians are married at some point in their careers. Likewise, I think that most physicians become parents or step-parents at some point in their lives. I highly doubt that any medical school expects to select a crop of applicants that reject the future posibility of parenthood.

That said, I think that you should expect to be asked how you will balance career and "family life". Family life can be getting home from work in time to walk you dog. What the interviewer wants to know is how you will balance medicine and family. You can ignore the "do you plan to have children" question and answer with a response that shows that you have thought about the need (from a mental health standpoint) of being able to balance work and play/ workplace and homelife.

 

[getunconcsious]

And stop the hating on Texas schools!

I'm not hating on the TMDSAS schools per se, in fact I turned down an acceptance from out-of-state to go to a Texas school (The same one as you, in fact). I like the Texas schools, I'm just saying that they run their admissions process completely differentely. I interviewed at 4 TMDSAS schools and 3 AMCAS schools. All of the illegal/inappropriate/offensive/whatever you want to call them type questions came from the Texas schools. I just think they are a lot less careful about the kinds of questions they ask interviewees, and they tend to ask a lot more inappropriate questions. Texas has great schools, but you can't deny that they have a certain attitude that the other schools don't.

 

[LadyJubilee8_18]

Oh no...I see a flame war starting.

On another note, I'm not really understanding what the term "illegal question" connotes in this situation. More specifically, what defines an "illegal question" and what are the possible ramifications of asking an "illegal question"? Get sued by the ACLU? I'm just trying to clear this up because everyone throws this term around, yet there still seems to be much ambiguity surrounding the topic.

And stop the hating on Texas schools!

Someone is damn serious about their kids! I don’t know if this is an "illegal" question either....Why would the representative from the TMDSAS system make a point to tell us to think about this question? He was saying that women's more prominent role in medicine is severely changing the field because they need so much time off to have kids and to take care of the kids. He even blamed the "doctor shortage" thing on this issue (which I didn’t think was fair, but whatever). Maybe it's just a growing issue among the Texas schools and this year's applicants should worry about it, I donno.

 

[LadyJubilee8_18]

Someone is damn serious about their kids! I don’t know if this is an "illegal" question either....Why would the representative from the TMDSAS system make a point to tell us to think about this question? He was saying that women's more prominent role in medicine is severely changing the field because they need so much time off to have kids and to take care of the kids. He even blamed the "doctor shortage" thing on this issue (which I didn’t think was fair, but whatever). Maybe it's just a growing issue among the Texas schools and this year's applicants should worry about it, I donno.

 

[LadyJubilee8_18]

Sorry, my computer had a brain fart....didnt mean to post twice

 

[Brain]

Someone is damn serious about their kids! I don’t know if this is an "illegal" question either....Why would the representative from the TMDSAS system make a point to tell us to think about this question? He was saying that women's more prominent role in medicine is severely changing the field because they need so much time off to have kids and to take care of the kids. He even blamed the "doctor shortage" thing on this issue (which I didn’t think was fair, but whatever). Maybe it's just a growing issue among the Texas schools and this year's applicants should worry about it, I donno.

Yeah I'm going to ignore that comment as what I have to say in response is not very nice.

So they specifically said to think about this question? Interesting. It came up at UTMB and UTSW for me. We had a discussion in one of my classes last week about the increasing proportion of women in medicine. Yes, it is changing the field but in a good way. Women physicians offer more preventative care services, give more information to their patients, are more successful in extracting information from their patients, and patients are more satisfied with female physicians than male physicians. Here are a couple of the articles if anyone happens to be interested:

The Influence of Gender on Physician Practice Style
Bertakis KD, Helms J, Callahan EJ, etal
From: Medical Care
Volume/Edition: 33 (4)
Pages/Time: 407 - 416
Source/Year: 1995

Rece, Gender, and Partnership in the Patient-Physicial Relationship
Cooper-Patrick L, Gallo JJ, Gonzales JJ, etal
From: Journal of the American Medical Association
Volume/Edition: 282 (6)
Pages/Time: 583 - 589
Source/Year: 1999

I'd post them if I knew how to put pdf files up. And no, females aren't entirely to blame for the doctor shortage. It's true that many aren't willing to work the 80 hours a week that men are but I think to some extent more women entering fields such as medicine will to force men to take greater parental responsibilities. Personally, I don't think anyone should work 80+ hours a week regardless of family responsibilities.

 

[Obedeli]

Someone is damn serious about their kids! I don’t know if this is an "illegal" question either....Why would the representative from the TMDSAS system make a point to tell us to think about this question? He was saying that women's more prominent role in medicine is severely changing the field because they need so much time off to have kids and to take care of the kids. He even blamed the "doctor shortage" thing on this issue (which I didn’t think was fair, but whatever). Maybe it's just a growing issue among the Texas schools and this year's applicants should worry about it, I donno.

There is a process for complaining about illegal questions and the aamc does get involved and schools can get in trouble. I don't know much about it except from the residency side where questions like that can get ACGME on their butts real fast. I would look into it. The trouble is how anonymous is it. I mean, is it worth ruining your chances to prove you are right and they are wrong?! I don't know. I just have to say, yes I am serious about my kids (ummm shouldn't I be? ) , kids in general and the wanton use of the word "hate" but regardless, this type of question is completely inappropriate. Can you ask them if they plan to have kids while teaching your lectures?! I know plenty of successful female physicians with kids. This is complete BS!

 

[v-tach]

And no, females aren't entirely to blame for the doctor shortage. It's true that many aren't willing to work the 80 hours a week that men are but I think to some extent more women entering fields such as medicine will to force men to take greater parental responsibilities. Personally, I don't think anyone should work 80+ hours a week regardless of family responsibilities.

In addition, not all men are willing to work 80 hours a week either! Women aren't the only ones going for the "lifestyle" specialties. I think men as well as women want to be able to spend a reasonable amount of time with their families--and that's a good thing. Parenting is a team effort--the father needs to be involved too, and I think people are realizing that. As for the doctor shortage, I'm not really sure what's to blame--probably a combination of factors. It's not like there aren't enough people applying to med schools though!!!!!

 

[FloridaMadame]

It doesn't matter whether the question of having children and being a mother/doctor, is illegal or not. I don't think any applicant is going to tell their interviewer that their question is unacceptable. Instead, female applicants should really just be prepared to answer truthfully. I was all set to offer up my explanation of how I could function efficiently as a mom and Dr., but out of more than a dozen+ interviews, I was never asked the question. But, then again, I did NOT interview in the Lone Star State.

 

[prana_md]

http://www.essayedge.com/medical/admissions/interview.shtml

Personal/Illegal Questions:

* Has anyone close to you been seriously ill or died?
* Have you ever been ill or injured?
* What is your relationship with your family like?
* What is more important to you than anything else?
* Are you married/do you have children?
* Do you plan to have children in the future?
* How will you juggle a medical career with a family?
* How important is family to you?
* How do you plan to pay for medical school?

Yeah, I know that each of us would be hard pressed to stand up to our interviewer and tell them they're asking an offensive, sexist, almost certainly illegal question. But if we bring it up on SDN, and get the word out that these questions are unacceptable (unless you have kids and want to talk about them, then more power to ya) then maybe we can rein in interviewers and keep them talking about medicine, not our fertility.

 

[docdaname]

I want to preface by saying that I think that women make just as good of doctors as men and I see no reason to stick to traditional gender roles. That said, how is this question Illegal? what law does it violate? Second, I think it is a very apropriate question. True, men have kids as doctors, my dad is a doctor and had 2 children when he started med school (3 when he was done). However, traditionally, women have stayed home to take care of their children (while others opt for daycare). Im not saying women should do this, but it is very appropriate to know if someone who has children is going to want to stay home with them. Becuase after all, whats the point of training a physician if they wont practice? I beleive that this question is asking if you have thought about hte possibilities of your future.

 

[prana_md]

I've completely resigned myself to the fact that this argument is going to split off into two camps: the "why train doctors if they won't practice" camp and the "WTF, that's so offensive" camp.

That said, I'm going to try to come up with a question for a male interviewee that's just as inapprorpriate.
"So ... after all that sitting on your butt studying, can you still get it up? Or do you need, ahem, pharmaceutical help?"

I want to tell you what law it violates, but I gave my "how-to-interview" book to someone else (that's where I originally read it). &%$@. Civil Rights Act? Something basic like that?

 

[f_w]

I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

While I think that this question is entirely inappropriate, I don't think it is actually illegal. In a job interview it would be, but for admission to a typically private educational institution, they can ask you whatever they please (whether you are a virgin, like anal sex, anything goes).

Why don't you try this for an answer:

'Oh, I have realized that you can only have one: kids OR career. I have decided on career, so I had my tubes tied (and I mean tied, not some sissy clip which could fail, I am talking real thread, cut and bipolar cautery). As a physician, you just can't be trusted with ovaries and a functioning uterus.'

Look for the reaction on the interviewers face.

An inappropriate question deserves an inappropriate answer. If you don't want to hire/admit women, just don't interview them. Don't start asking very personal questions that might touch off a lot of blissfully suppressed conflicts. (There is a reason they outlawed this crap for job interviews, it should be off-limits for medschool application as well.)

 

[winstonm]

One of my interview invitations for an Ontario school had this included in the email:

12. Under the Ontario Human Rights Code you are entitled to equal opportunities without regard to:

- race or colour
- national or ethnic origin
- religion
- age
- family or marital status
- sex (including pregnancy or childbirth)
- pardoned convictions
- disability
- sexual orientation

Interviewers have been advised they may not directly question you on any of the above and that you have been advised you may refuse (WITHOUT PREJUDICE) to answer any such question.

 

[prana_md]

That's awsome, winstonm!

 

[f_w]

Ontario, as Ontario Canada I presume.
(In the US there is even a medical center that openly tells you that unless you are 7th day adventist, you might as well not apply to one of their residency programs. )

 

[leechy]

I got asked a lot of illegal questions (see prana's quoted list for examples) on my interview trail. Unfortunately, as inappropriate as these questions are, they do get asked, often in friendly and well-meaning ways (though the interviewer's ulterior motives may not be so friendly or well-meaning). I am not at all sure that these questions are illegal at private educational institutions. The other issue is that even if they are illegal, it's easier said than done to stand up to your interviewer on the spot and give them the kind of answer they deserve, unless you decide at that moment that you no longer care about getting admitted to that school. In that case, then by all means, speak your mind. But otherwise, you're caught - giving an honest answer might be injurious to your admissions chances, as would declining to answer.

Even reporting a bad interviewer after the fact is a hard decision, because the administration may view you as a whiner who might cause them trouble down the road. As with so many other things in life, sometimes you just suck it up and deal with the system. If/when I am someday in a position of power on an ad com, I will definitely try to make sure these questions don't get asked anymore.

 

[f_w]

As for the 'so, you wanna have kids' question, I think it is entirely appropriate to answer with a straightfaced lie: 'No, not during medical school'. That avoids the follow-up question on how you intend to balance it etc.

Feel free to lie. During an interview there is no way the interviewer could proove you wrong.

Some more answers

* Has anyone close to you been seriously ill or died?

No

* Have you ever been ill or injured?

No

* What is your relationship with your family like?

Very good. Thanks for asking.

* What is more important to you than anything else?

My health.

* Are you married/do you have children?

No/Yes No/Yes (doesn't matter what you answer)

* Do you plan to have children in the future?

Yes (its the future, a long time until then)

* Do you plan to have children while in school?

No (heck, if it happens it was not 'planned')

* How will you juggle a medical career with a family?

My husband is independently wealthy and I will have a full time live-in nanny.

* How important is family to you?

Important.

* How do you plan to pay for medical school

With money, last time I checked the bursars office didn't take sea-shells.
Or: I have a brother who does well and will pay for anything I can't cover with loans.

 

[PineappleGirl]

I went to a TMDSAS meeting today at U of H and the host mentioned that medical schools often ask students (especially female students) weather or not they want to have kinds. If the answer to this question is “yes” they want to know how you will balance your familial obligations with your career. I understand that med schools would rather students who will not have families, so what is the right answer to this question. I am tempted to just give a joke answer like, “Well, being a med student will be convenient because I will already be working at a hospital! I will just go to work the day I am due, pop into the OBGYN office around lunch break and you know, squeeze the baby out, have a little OJ and get back to work!” J/K. But seriously, how did you all answer this question?

I am truly amazed that this question is seriously asked to women students in interviews. Perhaps I'm just naive, but I'm quite shocked by this. Personally, I have very little desire to have children and would prefer to devote my time to my career. I suppose if my husband was absolutely set on having children, I might be persuaded, but I really don't like kids, especially babies. Do you think a woman would be perceived negatively for saying they did not want to have children? When I say I don't want to have kids to some of my female friends (especially those who are married with kids) they look at me like I am crazy. I thought we had moved past the times when a woman's primary purpose in life was be a mother.

 

[f_w]

Personally, I have very little desire to have children and would prefer to devote my time to my career. I suppose if my husband was absolutely set on having children, I might be persuaded, but I really don't like kids, especially babies.

Are you 29 yet ?

On your 30th b-day, the posterior lobe of the pituitary starts to emit 'babyphysin'. It will create that unstoppable urge to have a baby NOW. (If you are lucky, you are married at that point and have a partner to go along with it. If you are unlucky, you will start looking at this point, and similar to the effects of alcohol, 'babyphysin' will cloud your judgement regarding the quality of the mating material.)

When I say I don't want to have kids to some of my female friends (especially those who are married with kids) they look at me like I am crazy.

Don't worry, it's them who are crazy. Your friends are already beyond repair. You can't argue the merits of having kids and when to have them with someone who already has them. The HCG surge during early pregnancy atrophies the neuron that contains the thought 'maybe it is a good idea to finish my education first'. The concept of waiting/timing kids gets entirely lost on most people who have them.

 

[PineappleGirl]

Personally, I have very little desire to have children and would prefer to devote my time to my career. I suppose if my husband was absolutely set on having children, I might be persuaded, but I really don't like kids, especially babies.

Are you 29 yet ?

On your 30th b-day, the posterior lobe of the pituitary starts to emit 'babyphysin'. It will create that unstoppable urge to have a baby NOW. (If you are lucky, you are married at that point and have a partner to go along with it. If you are unlucky, you will start looking at this point, and similar to the effects of alcohol, 'babyphysin' will cloud your judgement regarding the quality of the mating material.)

LOL. No, I'm only 25.
Is there some kind of drug I can take to stop the powerful effects of babyphysin? I've already planned my whole life around not having kids.

 

[f_w]

Is there some kind of drug I can take to stop the powerful effects of babyphysin? I've already planned my whole life around not having kids.

You can buy temporary protection by going for a neurosurgery or ortho residency. The food and sleep deprivation will carry you over that critical period from the 30th b-day to age 35. At that point, your fertility will have decreased sufficiently that the risk becomes manageable.

I have seen some of the brightest women around me go completely gaga once they reached 30. One of them, a friend of my wife, is 32, board certified in emergency medicine, pulls 300k a year and on top of that is very good looking. But guess what, she dates these 23 year old up-to-no-good biker guys and tries to trap them into marriage. It is insane, the goverment should do something about it.

 

[Brain]

I am truly amazed that this question is seriously asked to women students in interviews. Perhaps I'm just naive, but I'm quite shocked by this. Personally, I have very little desire to have children and would prefer to devote my time to my career. I suppose if my husband was absolutely set on having children, I might be persuaded, but I really don't like kids, especially babies. Do you think a woman would be perceived negatively for saying they did not want to have children? When I say I don't want to have kids to some of my female friends (especially those who are married with kids) they look at me like I am crazy. I thought we had moved past the times when a woman's primary purpose in life was be a mother.

At one of my interviews, the lady was totally cool with my saying I don't want to have kids. She said "My sister says the exact same thing. It's not like we don't have a ton of kids out there already." Another interviewer asked me to elaborate on why. I was pissed because this is just not something I'm comfortable talking about at a professional school interview.

 

[f_w]

I guess the answer 'because I hate the little bastards' won't get you brownie-points during a medschool interview.

Don't you know, it is your god-given duty to reproduce !!

Looks like you gals can't win. If you say 'Yes', they will follow with the 'so how are you going to balance this with our very demanding curriculum'. If you say 'No' they look at you as this cold uncaring career obsessed robot.

I am so glad I am a guy.

 

[rugirlie]

The only school that asked me an illegal question was BU and really hindsight is 20/20 and I should have gone straight to the dean after it happened but I was too concerned with not offending anyone and hurting my chances. :-/

I'm surprised you didn't say anything asap. When I interviewed at BU, before the interviews started, Dean Weitzburg (sp?) made a big deal of saying how this was your only chance for the school to get to know you and because of that, if you were unahppy with your interview, you should go to him immediately and he would arrange another interview for you with someone different by the end of the day so that your chances for admission weren't hindered. Did he not tell you this? I would think if he did, you wouldn't hesitate. That sucks Mega.

 

[PineappleGirl]

At one of my interviews, the lady was totally cool with my saying I don't want to have kids. She said "My sister says the exact same thing. It's not like we don't have a ton of kids out there already." Another interviewer asked me to elaborate on why. I was pissed because this is just not something I'm comfortable talking about at a professional school interview.

Yeah, we certainly have plenty of kids already. If I were persuaded to raise a family, I would consider adoption first and foremost. You're totally justified in being upset about being asked to talk about why you don't want to have children. I also would not be comfortable discussing my reasons for not wanting to have children in a med school interview.

 

[PineappleGirl]

Looks like you gals can't win. If you say 'Yes', they will follow with the 'so how are you going to balance this with our very demanding curriculum'. If you say 'No' they look at you as this cold uncaring career obsessed robot.

I am so glad I am a guy.

Consider yourself lucky, seriously.

 

[LadyJubilee8_18]

My sister will vouch for the babyphysin thing. She got a masters degree at Yale and is now pregnant even though her boyfriend at the time was a total loser! They aren’t together anymore, but she is so happy to be pregnant, she doesn’t even care. And she is just 28!