Living situation advice

[DrDreams]

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hello everyone,

i just wanted some advice about living about 17 miles away from medical school. i have a family and kids. I just cant find a 4 bedroom near school for the same price, and im finding 3 bedrooms but they are too tiny for a family of 6. We have 4 kids 3,2,1,0
some facts about school, its on a block system so we have an exam once in 30 days. We are usually at school mon-fri 8-5

Here are the facts about the 4 bedroom:
-flexible land lord
-in the boonies (we arent white so sadly we do have to consider the fact of possible racism)
-hospital 17 miles away
-school 17 miles away
-larger house
-dishwasher
-900 a month rent, low security deposit
-land lord waits for my loan disbursement and i just pay a semester at a time
- commute is entirely highway
- if we get approved for rental housing assistance she will accept it
-20 to 23 min drive
- 2 bedrooms are on one side of the mobile home 2 on the other which means id be separated from the family while studying which means peace and quiet.
-very peaceful home
-no street lamps, outside is super dark, only 13 homes around and the backside of the house is a mountain.

3 bedroom facts
- 10 minutes from school
-975 rent
-975 security deposit
-will not accept rental housing assistance
- no dishwasher
-huge deck
-10 minutes from school
- all bedrooms are connected to the main living room
- awesome deck

If we lived close we would have to live in a 3 bedroom, the rent for a 4 bedroom is 900 and 1000 for a 3 bedroom near by. But the 3 bedroom is significantly smaller but it is located near everything.

I am really torn in this decision and any advice would be great.
I forgot to add, we will be living completely off loans. I am not sure if that will change anything.

 

[Awesome Sauceome]

I cant help but think about Jim Gaffigan. He was living with like 4 or 5 kids in a two bedroom apartment in Manhattan. He likes it because of the convenience of being close to the things that he does often.

Take a coin, flip it but dont look at how it lands. In that split second of flipping and waiting for it to land, what does your gut say (as in you dont care whether its heads or tails, you know what you want). Its crazy how well this can work sometimes. When in doubt follow your gut.

 

[DODaze2017]

We have students that live closer to an hour away. 20 min is easily doable.

 

[abolt18]

personally I hate to commute. So we opted to have a little smaller apartment and no garage in exchange for being 5 minutes from my hospital. It's all about you priorities. For me it's all about spending less time commuting and more time with my family (and cost obviously makes a difference). Then again I try to never study at home and keep school and home separate so a short commute is even better this way

 

[Jagon]

Question to OP and others : is it even possible to support a family with 4 kids on loans only? It's seems completely impossible without being on welfare (which no med student should be on lol)

 

[DrDreams]

Thanks for your input guys. I find studying at home and taking short breaks with my family important. But also I absolutely hate feeling cramped. Going back tonight to make my final decision. The thought of being close and being able to just study at school is nice. I think going home to eat is also something that is important but I will keep you guys posted.

 

[hallowmann]

Question to OP and others : is it even possible to support a family with 4 kids on loans only? It's seems completely impossible without being on welfare (which no med student should be on lol)

Not really sure why you think that. The entire point of welfare is to help people and families when they don't have the means to support themselves. That includes med students. If anything, a med student on welfare is valuable, because in a few short years they'll be paying a ton to the government, supporting the program that supported them in their time of need. I would also think it would give that med student a unique perspective on a system that many of their patients will be forced to use.

To be clear, I'm not in that situation. I have been lucky (and I really mean lucky here, not smart, hardworking, etc.) enough not to need that sort of outside assistance, but I certainly know people who do need it and are forced to use it for their family and specifically for their children.

 

[DocVapor]

Larger house and the longer drive every day. Use the drive as a wind up in the morning, and a wind down in the afternoon. Your family will be happier with more room, and that means there won't be as much stress put on you when you get home.

 

[DrDreams]

Not really sure why you think that. The entire point of welfare is to help people and families when they don't have the means to support themselves. That includes med students. If anything, a med student on welfare is valuable, because in a few short years they'll be paying a ton to the government, supporting the program that supported them in their time of need. I would also think it would give that med student a unique perspective on a system that many of their patients will be forced to use.

To be clear, I'm not in that situation. I have been lucky (and I really mean lucky here, not smart, hardworking, etc.) enough not to need that sort of outside assistance, but I certainly know people who do need it and are forced to use it for their family and specifically for their children.

I completely agree with you. In fact 3 physicians have advised me to get on it if I can because I'll be paying a lot more than what I'll be receiving.

I am fortunate to be where I am. No one in my family is a college graduate. I am the first college grad and soon hopefully the first doctor. I'm going to do whatever I can to ensure my family lives comfortably because they will be put through a tough time through my journey as it is.

Larger house and the longer drive every day. Use the drive as a wind up in the morning, and a wind down in the afternoon. Your family will be happier with more room, and that means there won't be as much stress put on you when you get home.

Thank you. I didn't think of it that way. But the winding down will definitely help. 🙂

 

[abolt18]

I completely agree with you. In fact 3 physicians have advised me to get on it if I can because I'll be paying a lot more than what I'll be receiving.

I am fortunate to be where I am. No one in my family is a college graduate. I am the first college grad and soon hopefully the first doctor. I'm going to do whatever I can to ensure my family lives comfortably because they will be put through a tough time through my journey as it is.




Thank you. I didn't think of it that way. But the winding down will definitely help. 🙂

It appears Jagon has no actual comprehension of what welfare is for. Whatever benefits you may receive in med school will be repaid in full within a short time of beginning practice. If you can get Medicaid, foodstamps, WIC, rent assistance, utilities assistance, do it! Good luck and may you're budgeting be strong!

 

[MLT2MT2DO]

You'll live 20 minutes away from where you go to school....this is an issue?

 

[AMEHigh]

Question to OP and others : is it even possible to support a family with 4 kids on loans only? It's seems completely impossible without being on welfare (which no med student should be on lol)

Why shouldn't a med student receive government assistance if needed? Not everyone is lucky enough to have mommy and daddy to fall back on if they need assistance. Yes it's possible to raise several kids on loans depending on the financial factors.

OP, the commutes aren't that different so I'd go with the house/area that I love more. I had a 35 min commute on public transport during med school in order to live in a more desirable area and I have no regrets. I'm looking at the same decision for residency and I'm going with the longer commute to love my home.

 

[NonTradJp]

For me I would say 45 minutes drive away would be max for commute.

I do wonder how different are the two areas. Safety and access to groceries and such may make an impact on your family's well being. I would take the longer distance if it's not more than 45 minutes away and still have reasonable access to things your family need and is safe.

With kids, school is a joint endeavor. Make sure your family is comfortable first IMO.

 

[Promethean]

The longer commute sounds reasonable. I say this as someone who likes to walk to work/school, if at all possible. I was leaning toward closer, of course, until I read your situation. More space, less rent, and a more reasonable landlord? Why is there even still a question? That is totally worth driving an extra 15 minutes each way.

 

[DrDreams]

Guys,

I ended up getting the closer place. The thing is that I am in the mountains, so to have a place thats 17 miles out and have steep inclines and declines to get to school was something that was unappealing. God forbid something happen in the winter id have to come home and then go back to the city to get to the hospital. Not only that it is pitch black at night, no streetlamps whatsoever. Finally i found out it was a high crime area.

I ended up going with the 3 bedroom, 7 minutes from school, landlord negotiated the rent and was super super super flexible. my parents loved it, my wife loved it. Overall this was a good trip. I think not having to worry about my family has been the greatest burden lifted off my shoulders. Being close to the hospital etc. the best part is that my kids can go to a good school district. 🙂

Thank you guys so much for all of your input and help 🙂