Patient allergies that make us laugh (or cry)

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HomeSkool

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Please don't put epi or cortisol or "[pick an opioid] makes me nauseated" or any of those other stupid ones we've all heard before.

I'll start:

Ambien
- "It makes me really sleepy...no, like, really, really sleepy." (Yeah? Well, it knocks me the hell out!)

Methohexital
- "It makes me have seizures." (Patient got methohexital for ECT.)

Morphine
- "It gives me temporary lower-body paralysis." (It was Duramorph in a spinal for c-section.)

Oxygen
- "The nasal cannula dries my nose out."

Oxygen
- "They put my grandpa on that right before he died."

Anesthesia
- "It makes me black out and have pseudoseizures."

Your turn, SDN. Make me happy.
 
any of the environmental allergies
 

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Timeout before pediatric colonoscopy for obese child (indication for scope: constipation).....

Nurse: Pt X has an allergy to green leafy vegetables
Me: Man, i wonder why he's constipated?
 
I was hoping that one would show up. I get that one a lot

Also usual old person: “Versed makes me crazy” No shyte Sherlock

It makes me crazy when that shows up in the chart; or the patient adamantly tells me that he cannot have epi no matter what........

You ded?
 
"Allergies" to steroids and epi. Plus all the allergies that are just expected side effects, AKA the mark of Stupid. (Btw, this is basically the only country in the world where one would expect warning labels for obvious things, such as "HOT" on an electric iron or coffee cup. Here are some of them.)

And my favorite: "I am allergic to scopolamine patches. Last time I had one, I ended up in the ER." What happened? "I was having hallucinations." How long did you keep the patch on? "5 days."
 
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Timeout before pediatric colonoscopy for obese child (indication for scope: constipation).....

Nurse: Pt X has an allergy to green leafy vegetables
Me: Man, i wonder why he's constipated?
Got eem......hilarious
 
She may be allergic to nickel indeed.


Im sure she was...but why not just say that instead of cheap jewelry? Cause only 24K works for that sensitive skin....
 
What, you don't have a dust injection port on your anesthesia machines? You must be using last year's model.

I make sure to switch out the HEPA filter in the machine when the dust level on the monitor gets too high
 
“I am allergic to morphine, codeine, oxycodone, OxyContin, hydrocodone. The only thing that works, I think starts with D. Diieee- something, I don’t really remember. And I get itchy too, so usually they get me Benadryl with it.” “It works best when you push the drugs together and follow a flush.”
 
Patient listed succinylcholine as an allergy. I though, "OK. I'll bite". I asked the patient, "Why are you allergic to succinylcholine? Do you have a cholinesterase deficiency?" Patient replied, "What? No. It makes me stop breathing." I thought maybe she didn't know what I was referring to so I asked, "For how long?" She replied, "Oh not long. Just a few minutes." Sorry I asked.
 
“I am allergic to morphine, codeine, oxycodone, OxyContin, hydrocodone. The only thing that works, I think starts with D. Diieee- something, I don’t really remember. And I get itchy too, so usually they get me Benadryl with it.” “It works best when you push the drugs together and follow a flush.”

standard
 
“I am allergic to morphine, codeine, oxycodone, OxyContin, hydrocodone. The only thing that works, I think starts with D. Diieee- something, I don’t really remember. And I get itchy too, so usually they get me Benadryl with it.” “It works best when you push the drugs together and follow a flush.”

Said most opiate addicted patients on my ED rotation in intern year. Weren't even shy to tell you exactly what they wanted.
 
Said most opiate addicted patients on my ED rotation in intern year. Weren't even shy to tell you exactly what they wanted.
Would it be unethical to shoot one of them with saline/equally innocuous solution telling them it wasn't and send them on their way?
 
Had an elderly patient tell me that she was allergic to volatile Anesthetics because of anaphylaxis to “parabens”. Was adamant and it didn’t help that her husband was a retired physician who agreed with her. Previously had volatile Anesthetics and was nauseated. Attributed nausea to parabens in volatile...
 
Fluorescent light.

I did have a patient that was frequently short on his opioids at the end of each month- by about 20%. He took measures to secure them in a combination safe that only he had the combination to, but they continued to be short. I was skeptical but prescribed some naltrexone tabs to mix in with the opioid tablets but told him to take the naltrexone "only in case of an overdose". He found his son in his room that afternoon curled up in a ball with massive nausea, vomiting, and abdominal cramps. Turns out his son had secretly recorded the combination to the safe using a hidden camera and had been pilfering the drugs.
 
Fluorescent light.

I did have a patient that was frequently short on his opioids at the end of each month- by about 20%. He took measures to secure them in a combination safe that only he had the combination to, but they continued to be short. I was skeptical but prescribed some naltrexone tabs to mix in with the opioid tablets but told him to take the naltrexone "only in case of an overdose". He found his son in his room that afternoon curled up in a ball with massive nausea, vomiting, and abdominal cramps. Turns out his son had secretly recorded the combination to the safe using a hidden camera and had been pilfering the drugs.

Wow.
 
Had an elderly patient tell me that she was allergic to volatile Anesthetics because of anaphylaxis to “parabens”. Was adamant and it didn’t help that her husband was a retired physician who agreed with her. Previously had volatile Anesthetics and was nauseated. Attributed nausea to parabens in volatile...

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing
 
Patient listed succinylcholine as an allergy. I though, "OK. I'll bite". I asked the patient, "Why are you allergic to succinylcholine? Do you have a cholinesterase deficiency?" Patient replied, "What? No. It makes me stop breathing." I thought maybe she didn't know what I was referring to so I asked, "For how long?" She replied, "Oh not long. Just a few minutes." Sorry I asked.
The real question is: did she get a dose of sux awake and realized it stopped her breathing or what idiot told her that she was allergic to sux after that particular previous surgery? You know...considering we don’t typically give sux to awake patients.
 
The real question is: did she get a dose of sux awake and realized it stopped her breathing or what idiot told her that she was allergic to sux after that particular previous surgery? You know...considering we don’t typically give sux to awake patients.

Probably a medicine team. I've seen med/peds teams write all kinds of crap about anesthesia that they don't understand in their notes.
 
Said most opiate addicted patients on my ED rotation in intern year. Weren't even shy to tell you exactly what they wanted.

I had a patient tell me she was allergic to acetaminophen. . . . . and that she wasn't taking the Percocet she was being prescribed every month.

Well I guess I'll have to call your pain doc. She still pisses me off. Lied about being pregnant. Some people.
 
MD-CTS blamed an iatrogenic dissection as a reaction to the anesthesia as one of the differential to cover his behind
 
Probably a medicine team. I've seen med/peds teams write all kinds of crap about anesthesia that they don't understand in their notes.

We once had a patient getting a skin graft and the circulator pulled undiluted epi for the wet gauze. Pts bp went to 250 for a solid 2-3 min (despite a ton of esmolol and cardene) and they ended up having an NSTEMI. The intern on cards wrote in their note that the 15mg of ephedrine administered earlier in the case was the cause.
 
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