Personal statement help

This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.

Phenylethylamin

New Member
10+ Year Member
Joined
May 18, 2013
Messages
9
Reaction score
0
Points
0
  1. Pre-Pharmacy
Advertisement - Members don't see this ad
I'm beginning to write a draft of my personal statement and I'm not sue what exactly to include. The whole thing is just vague to me for some reason. For example, are these following qualifies good to include?

- Grew up in a third world country. (middle east) Came here 5 years ago, and managed to learn the language and excel at school within that time frame.
- Interested in chemical behavior of vitamins/minerals/sports supplementation. I do extensive reading and research on that type of stuff—I'm a personal trainer and a bodybuilder.
- Skills/foundation in science: completed genetics, biochemistry, molecular biology (all with A's) Definitely fascinated by biochem and genetics!
- Skills in math: always had the highest grade in my math classes. Tutored math all my life. Also I took calculus II out of interest (got an A)
- Ability to interact with people: Again I'm a personal trainer, that's kind of what I do! I also volunteered at a physical therapy center for 6 months where I did a lot of interaction with patients.
- I also am gaining skill in a retail pharmacy as I'm volunteering right now.


I know I need a strong ‘reason' why I chose pharmacy and honestly I have no clue, other than ‘I like chemicals, want to help people and want good $'!!. So for now, I'm avoiding that part, and just focusing solely on what makes me a strong candidate.
 
I'm beginning to write a draft of my personal statement and I'm not sue what exactly to include. The whole thing is just vague to me for some reason. For example, are these following qualifies good to include?

- Grew up in a third world country. (middle east) Came here 5 years ago, and managed to learn the language and excel at school within that time frame.
- Interested in chemical behavior of vitamins/minerals/sports supplementation. I do extensive reading and research on that type of stuff—I’m a personal trainer and a bodybuilder.
- Skills/foundation in science: completed genetics, biochemistry, molecular biology (all with A’s) Definitely fascinated by biochem and genetics!
- Skills in math: always had the highest grade in my math classes. Tutored math all my life. Also I took calculus II out of interest (got an A)
- Ability to interact with people: Again I’m a personal trainer, that’s kind of what I do! I also volunteered at a physical therapy center for 6 months where I did a lot of interaction with patients.
- I also am gaining skill in a retail pharmacy as I'm volunteering right now.


I know I need a strong ‘reason’ why I chose pharmacy and honestly I have no clue, other than ‘I like chemicals, want to help people and want good $’!!. So for now, I'm avoiding that part, and just focusing solely on what makes me a strong candidate.


Cannot be an answer that other's give you.....it should come from your heart.
 
Avoid mentioning any grades on your PS. Maybe you can come up with an example of something that happened in your volunteering experience that made you want to pursue pharmacy. Talk about your background a little bit, what you like to do (what you are interested in) and what you would like to accomplish as a pharmacist. GL!
 
I'm beginning to write a draft of my personal statement and I'm not sue what exactly to include. The whole thing is just vague to me for some reason. For example, are these following qualifies good to include?

- Grew up in a third world country. (middle east) Came here 5 years ago, and managed to learn the language and excel at school within that time frame.
- Interested in chemical behavior of vitamins/minerals/sports supplementation. I do extensive reading and research on that type of stuff—I'm a personal trainer and a bodybuilder.
- Skills/foundation in science: completed genetics, biochemistry, molecular biology (all with A's) Definitely fascinated by biochem and genetics!
- Skills in math: always had the highest grade in my math classes. Tutored math all my life. Also I took calculus II out of interest (got an A)
- Ability to interact with people: Again I'm a personal trainer, that's kind of what I do! I also volunteered at a physical therapy center for 6 months where I did a lot of interaction with patients.
- I also am gaining skill in a retail pharmacy as I'm volunteering right now.


I know I need a strong ‘reason' why I chose pharmacy and honestly I have no clue, other than ‘I like chemicals, want to help people and want good $'!!. So for now, I'm avoiding that part, and just focusing solely on what makes me a strong candidate.

Definitely include that you are from a different country though I wouldn't dwell on it (unless you really want it to be the focus of your entire PS). As I mentioned to you in a PM, you want to sell yourself to whoever is reading your PS. You need to do this without sounding like you are full of yourself and without boring the hell out of them. A good place to start is by looking at everything you may have entered into PharmCAS (ECs, awards, scholarships, etc). You want to focus on how your life experiences will make you a better pharmacist (better patient interactions, good leadership skills, diversity factors, etc, etc).

Things to think about:

#1 - Adcoms don't care about your dead <insert random relative here> so go into details about these experiences at your own peril. Unless it has something to do directly with pharmacy, I would avoid taking the pity route. They hear it way to often. In my PS I included that my mother had cancer but I didn't focus the paper on that. Instead I talked about how my helping her manage her several dozen medications gave me a greater respect for what pharmacists do on a daily basis.

#2 - Adcoms must read your PS as part of their job, but if you hand them some dry, boring document they may not get through the entire thing before it goes into the wastebasket. Make it readable (flow well, proper spelling & grammar, etc) and engaging. Your opening paragraph is the most important and sets the tone for the entire rest of your paper. If your first couple of sentences are insipid trite it doesn't matter how good the rest of your PS is, they won't be able to stop thinking about how terrible your opening statement was.

#3 - Your PS must flow well. That means there should be connections from each preceding paragraph to the next, throughout the entire document. You know all those papers you've written throughout undergrad? Well all the same rules for those papers apply to your PS. Intro -> Paragraph #1 -> Paragraph #2 -> Paragraph #3 -> Conclusion, and they should all be 'linked', meaning the last sentence of your Intro should introduce Paragraph #1 and similarly Paragraph #3 should end leading the reader to your Conclusion. Your conclusion should 'resolve' your paper and refer back to what you introduced in your Intro.
Ex: Intro: Being really excited about chemistry led me to the field of pharmacy; Conclusion: While I started out with a simple background in chemistry my strong interests in this area eventually led me to the doorsteps of a field I can see pursuing a lifelong career in.​

#4 - You need people to read your work. You aren't a writer, so you should be looking to get as many people viewing your PS as possible. Likely your school has a writing center, take advantage of these expert eyes. They will likely inform you of what a horrible pile of crap you've written. Heed their advice, especially that of structure and formatting. The layout of your paper is nearly as important as the content. Not utilizing proper formatting is like putting a million dollar painting in a dollar store discount frame. It just doesn't look good. Have family read it and ask for honest opinions. There is even a place here on the SDN forums where people will proofread your PS for you and provide feedback. Spend some time (multiple hours) on your PS and do it over a period of time (don't wait until the last minute).

#5 - Don't be afraid to start over from scratch. After I wrote the first draft of my PS I was excited to be 'done.' Unfortunately, after I read through it later I realized it was garbage. I ended up rewriting the entire thing. I mined my first draft though for some good starter ideas. Maybe you'll be able to bang out a stellar PS in a single fell swoop, or maybe it will take you a few rewrites. Try to build on the foundation of each iteration.
 
Top Bottom