Premed Pickup Lines

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swifteagle43

swifteagle43

Lover- not a fighter
15+ Year Member
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Alright guys-here is a challenge:

Come up with pick up lines premed majors could use in picking up girls.

I will start:

"Want to play doctor?"
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Ja, in der Vaterland we use 3 fingers.
 
"I know exactly where all the most important parts are."
 
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let me stimulate your pudendal nerves.
 
Febrifuge said:
"I know exactly where all the most important parts are."
Click to expand...

nice...you can improve with an opener

"do you need help with anatomy?"

and then follow up with

Febrifuge said:
"I know exactly where all the most important parts are."
Click to expand...

I am really impressed
 
it must be in your genes.....take them off

🙁 i suck at this
 
swifteagle43 said:
Alright guys-here is a challenge:

Come up with pick up lines premed majors could use in picking up girls.

I will start:

"Want to play doctor?"
Click to expand...



"you have nice paravertebrals".......it worked one time...what can i say, i'm a lower back man
 
you: did the tox screen come back negative?
her: yes, it was negative.
you: go get some charcoal.
her: but the tox screen came back negative.
you: i know...i just wanted the charcoal so I could light a fire in your heart.

😳

*dodges tomatoes*
 
Hahahahahahhaha How would you EVER pull that off? You are hitting on your patients? :laugh: :laugh:


I got another one:
"I can write you a perspcription for happiness Its called (your name)."
Then write your name and number on a peice of paper and give it to her!
 
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Damnit Jim! said:
you: did the tox screen come back negative?
her: yes, it was negative.
you: go get some charcoal.
her: but the tox screen came back negative.
you: i know...i just wanted the charcoal so I could light a fire in your heart.

😳

*dodges tomatoes*
Click to expand...

Damnit Jim! *throws tomato*
 
I know a good calculus one (for all those premeds who took Calc)

"Hey baby. I wish I was your derivative so I could be tangent to all your curves."
 
swifteagle43 said:
Hahahahahahhaha How would you EVER pull that off? You are hitting on your patients? :laugh: :laugh:
Click to expand...

Not a patient. Maybe fellow premed or nurse when you're both examining a patient. 👍

I don't think it would be too hard. I've always wanted to try something corny like that.
 
maybe on a peds rotation:


My love for you is just like that last kid's explosive diarrhea....I just can't hold it in any longer.

boo!
 
Damnit Jim! said:
maybe on a peds rotation:


My love for you is just like that last kid's explosive diarrhea....I just can't hold it in any longer.

boo!
Click to expand...

I like the fact that you booed yourself! LOL that is awful joke man! Thats like being a psychiatrist and saying "I know why you are here. You are crazy about me right?"

just awful


but funny
 
Can I be the proton to your carbocation?
 
I think we can all get work now in the porn industry for writing scripts.
 
Now now, I just need to feel all the breasts I can so that I know what to feel for on my TUBEs.
 
:laugh: I was just thinking of making a thread like this.

Hey, baby, you want to do some genetic recombination?

Wanna see the new tongue depressor they came out with?

Here's the best one - just walk into a bar and say, "Hey, ladies! I'm pre-med!"
 
I heard it from one of my friends

What is your spin number? Actually some one replied to him by saying +1/2
 
Sorry, proton to you alkene...

or

Why don't we make like the charge of bromine in a alkane peroxide and meet half way (radical).
 
PhotoMD said:
Well seeing as protons and carbocations don't interact... Oh lord I am lame...
Click to expand...


Haha...it was bothering me too. I guess it would be "Can I be the nucleophile to your carbocation?"

Or you could try offer an SN1....do the Backsided attack!

Dorky....
 
logos said:
Haha...it was bothering me too. I guess it would be "Can I be the nucleophile to your carbocation?"

Or you could try offer an SN1....do the Backsided attack!

Dorky....
Click to expand...

actually, that's an Sn2 (bimolecular nucleophilic substitution).

Yes, I spent several years as an organic chemist.
 
What will I ever do? I lost my practice dummy the night before my MCATs?!
 
as a microbiologist i told a dude once to say:

baby u make my micrococcus experience exponential growth

too bad m.luteus only comes micro and not mega

and my favourite of all time is : molecular biologists do it with hot probes!!
 
wow u guys really got creative with those orgo ones they certainly make me swoon. (or NOT?) i like the calculus one tho 🙂 lets integrate so i can measure the area under all your curves. mathematicians do it discretely and continuously
 
You look dehydrated, want to exchange fluids?
 
"I'm drunk and you're still ugly"
 
Arsenic810 said:
"Now you my love are a candidate for plastic surgery." *SLAP!* 😱
Click to expand...

"I want to be a plastic surgeon. Can you please show me what a perfect body looks like?"
 
swifteagle43 said:
"I want to be a plastic surgeon. Can you please show me what a perfect body looks like?"
Click to expand...

Girls response: "Going into plastic surgery will be the only way you'll ever get your hands on anything this hot!" *tosses hair and turns around* 😡
 
haha how about this one: (haha not really for pre-med, but it is what we are working toward 😀 )

"I am a M3 😉 Still single, getting ready to do some rotation with you. Ladies??? "

HAHA can't wait until I can try this one out, hopefully I don't have to get that desperate :laugh:
 
DrHopeless said:
haha how about this one: (haha not really for pre-med, but it is what we are working toward 😀 )

"I am a M3 😉 Still single, getting ready to do some rotation with you. Ladies??? "

HAHA can't wait until I can try this one out, hopefully I don't have to get that desperate :laugh:
Click to expand...


LOL :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Thats a good one
 
acidhouse303 said:
as a microbiologist i told a dude once to say:

baby u make my micrococcus experience exponential growth

too bad m.luteus only comes micro and not mega

and my favourite of all time is : molecular biologists do it with hot probes!!
Click to expand...
yes, well, polymer scientists do it in chains.
 
I know only corny pickup lines:

Premed:"Did you know that there are 206 bones inside of your body?"
Girl:"Really?"
Premed:"Yeah, and I could show you how to get one more."
(Girl slaps desperate premed)
 
Stand a little closer, baby, and I'll bring palpitations to your liver.
 
1) i never used any "medical" pickup lines on girls before I got into med school.

2) basically everything i've read on here so far might get a chuckle.... but nothing more

3) the only thing I do now revolving around medicine absolutely requires both people to be drunk and for there to be some sexual chemistry between to the two people. If you're flirty and toucy feely with a a girl, just reach up and squeeze her boob, touch your lips to her ears and say "it's ok baby, i'm gonna be a doctor" it's worked for me so far.

but like i said, this wouldn't work if unless there was already a good amount of sexual energy building between the two people.
 
Not pre-med, exactly, but something a nerdy pre-med might say. Or a nerd in general! 😉

"I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? 'Cause
you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to."
 
UCLAstudent said:
Not pre-med, exactly, but something a nerdy pre-med might say. Or a nerd in general! 😉

"I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? 'Cause
you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to."
Click to expand...


HECK, YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!
 
a lawyerly premed:

"I bet you $20 you are gonna turn me down" 😀
 
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