Question for DESI MEN

[swifteagle43]

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H

 

[Ambs]

What's up with leaving the desi girls out of this? We have opinions, too!

 

[swifteagle43]

What's up with leaving the desi girls out of this? We have opinions, too!

don't compare apples with oranges please. its hard enough being an apple that when oranges start talking and they don't identify themselves as oranges in the forums it confuses the hell out of you. Confused yet?

 

[Ambs]

don't compare apples with oranges please. its hard enough being an apple that when oranges start talking and they don't identify themselves as oranges in the forums it confuses the hell out of you. Confused yet?

🙄 🙄

 

[paki20]

Hey dudes


Have you guys thought about going the traditional way of going back to pakistan/india/bangladesh and finding someone there(daughter of a family-friend or neighbors) and then comming back to the states with your spouse? Or even going traditional way of mairrage in the U.S?

Now before you start blasting me I just have some concerns that i think we should think about:

-Did you think about how much more you could focus on your studies by avoiding girl maintainence in college?

-Do you think that they would be too different culturally from us?(common...they are pretty damn liberal and modern there too...i ain't marrying no damn village girl)

-What if you don't find the "right" person by the time you turn 25(i am still 20) and you want to start having a family life?

-Do you think that there will be a stigma amongst your friends if you got married the traditional way?

1. i personally avoid girls at all time..my parents have told me to focus on my studies...they told me i have to become a doctor or else they will disown me...they told me girls are evil....unfortunately i go to a college where there are a lot of desis so whenever a desi girl walks by i just close my eyes to avoid the temptation

2. yes they will be different culturally to American culture...but if you are into the desi culture as much as yours truly then they will be same culturally, no? plus the fobby accent is tooooo fruity 😉

3. don't go for ABCDs...they will leave you in a second for another richer, cooler, funnier, smarter, more handsome, taller guy..trust me when i tell you to go for the traditional girl mera bhai...they're GRRRRRREEEEAT (throws pointed finger in the air)....a traditional girl from the homeland will make a perfect wife: she'll be very very smart, very very pretty (look exactly like aishwariya rai), plus she'll make great desi food (hmmmm biryani...) every single day after you come back from a long days work, iron your clothes before you go for that long day of work, take care of your eight kids, clean the house, wash the dishes, do the laundry, etc. see you can't find these types of girls here..see if u marry a girl who has been raised here..u'll become the traditional house-wife mere yaar...think only overseas..thats why I plan on going to Pakistan (which literally means "Land of the Pure") where all the girls are pure (ahh sigh....). Once I get my M.D. (which for me stands for Medical Dullah*) I'll sooo be in demand...the aunties and uncles will practically be handing me their beautiful, smart, pure daughters when they find out I have an M.D. and a US passport.

4. my friends would fall to the ground on their knees and kiss my feet..i'd be their role-model...ahh that'll be the life...finally respected by society for being a doctor, respected by your wife for being such a great husband, respected by your friends for having the perfect wife, but being respected by your parents is a big iffy because even with a GPA of a 3.99 I still get beaten with a sandal.

if any hot desi girls out there want to chat with a cool, perfect desi guy like me 😎 can you wait a few more years until I get my M.D. please? thank u come again.

P.S. aishwarya rai rocks my world! 😍

 

[i77ac]

just out of curiosity, have you been accepted to med school yet?

 

[swifteagle43]

just out of curiosity, have you been accepted to med school yet?

Me? I am a just a sophomore in college. 🙂 Why? Are you going to judge me because I want ot be traditional?

 

[flash]

I'm judging you for this ridiculous thread.

 

[Blake]

Me? I am a just a sophomore in college. 🙂 Why? Are you going to judge me because I want ot be traditional?

Nah, it's just that already making plans to marry a MD sounds far away.

 

[firebody]

no offense, but i think you might be ugly......don't worry man, i'm ugly too. we all can't be brad pitt ya know.

 

[pakidoc]

tauba tauba... kya mentality hai! 😡 😡

 

[gbiz]

hilarious response, paki20 👍 👍 👍

My gf is an abcd, and im, well as my desi friend calls me jokingly, some white guy, so now you can think what you want of her too! 😉 whats great is he always makes fun of the desi chicks on campus for going out with with "some white guy" to me, but then says my relationship is different with no explanation.

 

[LadyBulldog]

3. don't go for ABCDs...they will leave you in a second for another richer, cooler, funnier, smarter, more handsome, taller guy..trust me when i tell you to go for the traditional girl mera bhai...they're GRRRRRREEEEAT (throws pointed finger in the air)....a traditional girl from the homeland will make a perfect wife: she'll be very very smart, very very pretty (look exactly like aishwariya rai), plus she'll make great desi food (hmmmm biryani...) every single day after you come back from a long days work, iron your clothes before you go for that long day of work, take care of your eight kids, clean the house, wash the dishes, do the laundry, etc. see you can't find these types of girls here..:

Bull. FOBs can actually be less "traditional" than ABDs (notably taking the C out) esp those that leave the motherland....... you're seriously missing out by avoiding the ABDs....

as fas as apples and oranges are concerned...... well, u've lost this female desi there. 🙂

 

[Premedtomed]

Bull. FOBs can actually be less "traditional" than ABDs (notably taking the C out) esp those that leave the motherland....... you're seriously missing out by avoiding the ABDs....

as fas as apples and oranges are concerned...... well, u've lost this female desi there. 🙂

sadly Miss you are a rarity 🙁

To my Desi folks take it easy yaar. be smart and stay focused
flirt with chicks but nothing serious

It is understandable No need to go after ABCDs
ABDs are very rare . I have had close enough experience
Trust me
Ladki kabhi na kabhi mil jayegi yaar

 

[tinkerbelle]

every single day after you come back from a long days work, iron your clothes before you go for that long day of work, take care of your eight kids, clean the house, wash the dishes, do the laundry, etc. see you can't find these types of girls here..

sounds like you want a slave, not a *wife*

you know, you could just hire a maid to do this type of stuff

 

[AzAm34]

After growing up in the American culture, I don't think I'd ever even consider being with a fresh of the boat Pakistani; they're just so weird 😉. The ideal woman in my mind is a mix of the two cultures, though for whatever reason I only really get to see people at either one extreme or the other.

But anyways, I'd probably carve both of my eyes out with a spoon before going back to the homeland to get married 🙂

 

[kings2]

wow, I feel bad for you guys.

 

[swifteagle43]

After growing up in the American culture, I don't think I'd ever even consider being with a fresh of the boat Pakistani; they're just so weird 😉. The ideal woman in my mind is a mix of the two cultures, though for whatever reason I only really get to see people at either one extreme or the other.

But anyways, I'd probably carve both of my eyes out with a spoon before going back to the homeland to get married 🙂

My friend they get MTV over there too and before you carve out both of your eyes have you seen the market? And this ideal woman that is the mix of two cultures- where can I find one of these? seriously man- i am looking pretty hard but all I see is a sea of white people with some chocolate here and there but dammit...there is no choice here....

no offense, but i think you might be ugly......don't worry man, i'm ugly too. we all can't be brad pitt ya know.

HAHAHAHA! no dude actually I am alright with the girls but the deal is that it is a time thing. I have had a couple of relationships but they consume the hell out of my time. In our culture they setup this mechanism so the people don't waste time with this stuff. I am thinking of using this mechanism to simplify my life....you obviously have not seen how HOT some of these traditional mairrage paki girls are. I knew this 1 girl that was older than me 1 year....omfg....she coulda been like on the cover of a magazine or something...but she went traditional for the same reasons.

 

[AzAm34]

My friend they get MTV over there too and before you carve out both of your eyes have you seen the market? And this ideal woman that is the mix of two cultures- where can I find one of these? seriously man- i am looking pretty hard but all I see is a sea of white people with some chocolate here and there but dammit...there is no choice here....

Well, for one I hate MTV, so that doesn't help 😉

I have seen the market, and yes, these types of women are few and far between. I just can't imagine being with someone born and raised in the desi culture. Despite the fact that they may share some similar TV channels with us, the cultures are still incredibly different. I guess it really depends on what you're looking for, what I prefer could be completely different than what you're looking for. To each his own I suppose, good luck 😉

 

[swifteagle43]

Well, for one I hate MTV, so that doesn't help 😉

I have seen the market, and yes, these types of women are few and far between. I just can't imagine being with someone born and raised in the desi culture. Despite the fact that they may share some similar TV channels with us, the cultures are still incredibly different. I guess it really depends on what you're looking for, what I prefer could be completely different than what you're looking for. To each his own I suppose, good luck 😉

Do you like Biryani? How about haleem? Do you like katahkut? Well my friend....i like these foods. More important than the culture is the level of education and a willingness to explore another culture. Women in south asian speak english, like american tv, and are willing to explore american culture. If you connect....all the better. right?

Don't get me wrong. If I could find a ABD girl that could cook and that I connected to and would require little maintainence I would run to her quicker than superman. The problem is that at the end of the day I can't find one at my school. There are literally 20 girls there and I am thinking....(15 are older than me....that leaves 5......)....do i even like these girls or am I forcing myself to talk to them because they are desi....

 

[Ambs]

I'm judging you for this ridiculous thread.

That's what I'm saying...

 

[Aero047]

she'll make great desi food (hmmmm biryani...) every single day after you come back from a long days work, iron your clothes before you go for that long day of work, take care of your eight kids, clean the house, wash the dishes, do the laundry, etc. see you can't find these types of girls here..see if u marry a girl who has been raised here..u'll become the traditional house-wife mere yaar...think only overseas..thats why I plan on going to Pakistan (which literally means "Land of the Pure") where all the girls are pure (ahh sigh....). Once I get my M.D. (which for me stands for Medical Dullah*) I'll sooo be in demand...the aunties and uncles will practically be handing me their beautiful, smart, pure daughters when they find out I have an M.D. and a US passport.

What kind of a mentality is that? That's the most shallow justification I've heard. "They're pretter"? "The girls are pure there"? YEAH RIGHT. You just care about the prestige that comes along with being a doctor.

I hope I don't end up with a guy who follows your point of view. 👎

 

[tinkerbelle]

I hope I don't end up with a guy who follows your point of view. 👎

Sometimes I wonder if there are any decent, non-psychotic indian guys out there.

 

[virilep]

Hey all (desi's and non), lemme first say, some of the things that people say on this thread are meant as realllllly sarcastic posts, or just plain stupid. But in a way, swifteagle, this is a serious post. I've had so many long conversations with my friends just chillin. I guess it's cuz it's a serious issue in our (first generation desi's) culture. I was born and raised in the states to a set of strict parents. My dad was in the US Army and he went to India and got married traditionally. They've cultured me a great deal and I'm pretty happy that I'm not an ABCD. I can't even tell you how much I hate that C part. Anyhow, I'll try to let ya know what I think, even though it's hard to tell ya what I feel in a post.

Hey dudes


Have you guys thought about going the traditional way of going back to pakistan/india/bangladesh and finding someone there(daughter of a family-friend or neighbors) and then comming back to the states with your spouse? Or even going traditional way of mairrage in the U.S?

I have thought about this. Especially cuz I went back last december and went to like 4 weddings and saw how nice they were. I also met some girls that were really cool. But I don't think they'd fit right in. I went for 2 of my cousin's weddings. Now the girls are here and I helped them out with stuff like registering for classes, learning how to drive, and just other simple stuff that I know just because I live here. But mind you, it's a very tough adjustment for them. I mean, leaving EVERYTHING they know and being put in a place where they can't see their parents. But they do have friends now, but it's definately different. Every relationship has its rocky conditions, but in my eyes, it has more when you don't get to work out the kinks beforehand.

Now before you start blasting me I just have some concerns that i think we should think about:

-Did you think about how much more you could focus on your studies by avoiding girl maintainence in college?

Yeah, I did think about that. As far as my parents are concerned, they wanted me to focus on the studies and it kinda rubbed off on me and I felt the same way after a while. but it's all about balancing out the lifestyle that you want. I know plenty of people that dated and still did kick-ass on their GPA and MCAT. It's all about how you operate. Some people feed of the relationship and have a healthier lifestyle, and some people, sadly, get a full bucket of drama.

-Do you think that they would be too different culturally from us?(common...they are pretty damn liberal and modern there too...i ain't marrying no damn village girl)

Well, times are definately changing there. People are starting to date and get out more often. Especially in Bombay. I met some girls that I got into some pretty good conversations with, but they were hardly about anything serious, just cuz I didn't want to give them the impression that I wanted more out of them. But this question really depends on how you are as a person. if you're a clubber and drinker and smoker, not literally, but u know, then you might not be able to mix with a girl from there. Most of them don't get exposed to that sorta stuff, atleast that I know of.

-What if you don't find the "right" person by the time you turn 25(i am still 20) and you want to start having a family life?

Well, if all goes well, you'll be out of med school when you're 25. I'm 22 and I'll get done with my MD at 26. What if you don't find the right person? There are so many people that aren't married and are 30. Even though I don't plan on being one, things can happen. My plan, is that if I don't find someone by the time I take my boards, I'll tell my parents that they can look for me officially (they're unofficially looking now, even though I tell them not to). But it's kinda crazy cuz every marriage I go to, people and especially aunties ask me about stuff and try to introduce me to people. So in a way it's nice because you're not looked at as a kid anymore. So yeah, I mean, that's my failsafe plan. It's not like they're gonna say "you're marrying this girl" because I plan to date the girl beforehand anyhow. Even though it might be improper on Indian standards in India, I think it's necessary for our generation.

-Do you think that there will be a stigma amongst your friends(white) if you got married the traditional way?

Yeah, I definately think there is. Many of them have heard of "arranged marraige" and have a negative connotation behind it. It's just the way it is. But in all honesty the definition has greatly changed in our generation. I don't think we can call it arranged, but more of an introduced marraige. Kind of like how sometimes non-desi parents introduce their children to other children. I've done a lot of thinking on this and I figured that everything will fall into place. I don't think you should stress out about it. We're all destined to meet that one person. Just make sure you keep your head up, and you won't miss her. gluck.

PS. to Paki20, I'm assuming you were sarcastic, but if you weren't... damn. I feel sorry for ya.

 

[IndyZX]

Sometimes I wonder if there are any decent, non-psychotic indian guys out there.

right here.

 

[DieselPetrolGrl]

sounds like you want a slave, not a *wife*

you know, you could just hire a maid to do this type of stuff

maid for $40/hr
prostitute for $100/hr

tinky is right
i love her smarts
Go tinky!!

 

[DieselPetrolGrl]

Sometimes I wonder if there are any decent, non-psychotic indian guys out there.

almost none


there may be some like 1% but they dont have the JITT effect* at all




JITT = see lounge for definition

 

[LadyBulldog]

Sometimes I wonder if there are any decent, non-psychotic indian guys out there.

If u find one, I'll fight ya for him..... 🙂

 

[virilep]

If u find one, I'll fight ya for him..... 🙂

That's another thing, a lot of desi girls think they are no decent guys in the world.... that sucks that we get judged by some of the worst specimens ;-) haha. but in all honesty, there are some of us that are decent.

 

[paki20]

What kind of a mentality is that? That's the most shallow justification I've heard. "They're pretter"? "The girls are pure there"? YEAH RIGHT. You just care about the prestige that comes along with being a doctor.

I hope I don't end up with a guy who follows your point of view. 👎

LOL ok guys I was OBVIOUSLY joking..im not that big of a loser (ex. closing my eyes when a desi girl walks by LOL)....but sadly thats how some DESI guys do think and i was just tryin to give an example of an extreme.

but seriously and ironically Pakistani girls are definitly not pure. man they're worse than here. if they find out that you have a US passport and your an M.D. they're just going to marry you because of that...and once they get citizenship they would leave you...that happens so many times...so man be careful if you do go back to the homeland to find a wife. yes there are good choices there but you do have to be careful. there are some girls here as the above post mentioned that are ABD who are more traditional than girls in the homeland...just have to find the right one. having said all that, some desi girls here are very liberal and do act a bit sl*tty, they won't take **** from you at all, so don't expect them to cook food for you or anythin. some girls from overseas have the "can't live without you" mentality from all the love bull-**** escapist bollywood movies they've seen but girls here have the "can't live with you" mentality so be prepared for that my friend.

personally im going for the traditional wife whether she is a ABD or FOB...and let it be known to all the desi girls out there..i will treat my future wife like a RANI...a QUEEN..if she wants to work she can, but after a long hard days of work I'll come home and cook the food for her, and feed it to her with my own hands, we'll go out holding hands under the moonlight, won't let her EVER be sad, plus i'll suck it up and be man and watch all the shahrukh khan movies she wants to watch, and even after all that...I'll consider myself to be the luckiest man alive 😍

 

[Aero047]

right here.

heyy you're not so badd 😉

 

[Aero047]

LOL ok guys I was OBVIOUSLY joking..im not that big of a loser (ex. closing my eyes when a desi girl walks by LOL)....but sadly thats how some DESI guys do think and i was just tryin to give an example of an extreme.

but seriously and ironically Pakistani girls are definitly not pure. man they're worse than here. if they find out that you have a US passport and your an M.D. they're just going to marry you because of that...and once they get citizenship they would leave you...that happens so many times...so man be careful if you do go back to the homeland to find a wife. yes there are good choices there but you do have to be careful. there are some girls here as the above post mentioned that are ABD who are more traditional than girls in the homeland...just have to find the right one. having said all that, some desi girls here are very liberal and do act a bit sl*tty, they won't take **** from you at all, so don't expect them to cook food for you or anythin. some girls from overseas have the "can't live without you" mentality from all the love bull-**** escapist bollywood movies they've seen but girls here have the "can't live with you" mentality so be prepared for that my friend.

personally im going for the traditional wife whether she is a ABD or FOB...and let it be known to all the desi girls out there..i will treat my future wife like a RANI...a QUEEN..if she wants to work she can, but after a long hard days of work I'll come home and cook the food for her, and feed it to her with my own hands, we'll go out holding hands under the moonlight, won't let her EVER be sad, plus i'll suck it up and be man and watch all the shahrukh khan movies she wants to watch, and even after all that...I'll consider myself to be the luckiest man alive 😍

You're right. The girls in Pakistan are SLUTS, worse than the girls here. But they will marry any guy with an American passport just to have citizenship rights. Then they'll dump the guy. It really is sad. There are also girls here who are arrogant, and don't want to help around the house. That's ******ed. The man and woman have to work together to make things work.

 

[virilep]

good redemption paki20

 

[lilpakichic]

1. i personally avoid girls at all time..my parents have told me to focus on my studies...they told me i have to become a doctor or else they will disown me...they told me girls are evil....unfortunately i go to a college where there are a lot of desis so whenever a desi girl walks by i just close my eyes to avoid the temptation

2. yes they will be different culturally to American culture...but if you are into the desi culture as much as yours truly then they will be same culturally, no? plus the fobby accent is tooooo fruity 😉

3. don't go for ABCDs...they will leave you in a second for another richer, cooler, funnier, smarter, more handsome, taller guy..trust me when i tell you to go for the traditional girl mera bhai...they're GRRRRRREEEEAT (throws pointed finger in the air)....a traditional girl from the homeland will make a perfect wife: she'll be very very smart, very very pretty (look exactly like aishwariya rai), plus she'll make great desi food (hmmmm biryani...) every single day after you come back from a long days work, iron your clothes before you go for that long day of work, take care of your eight kids, clean the house, wash the dishes, do the laundry, etc. see you can't find these types of girls here..see if u marry a girl who has been raised here..u'll become the traditional house-wife mere yaar...think only overseas..thats why I plan on going to Pakistan (which literally means "Land of the Pure") where all the girls are pure (ahh sigh....). Once I get my M.D. (which for me stands for Medical Dullah*) I'll sooo be in demand...the aunties and uncles will practically be handing me their beautiful, smart, pure daughters when they find out I have an M.D. and a US passport.

4. my friends would fall to the ground on their knees and kiss my feet..i'd be their role-model...ahh that'll be the life...finally respected by society for being a doctor, respected by your wife for being such a great husband, respected by your friends for having the perfect wife, but being respected by your parents is a big iffy because even with a GPA of a 3.99 I still get beaten with a sandal.

if any hot desi girls out there want to chat with a cool, perfect desi guy like me 😎 can you wait a few more years until I get my M.D. please? thank u come again.

P.S. aishwarya rai rocks my world! 😍

Yea mister MD you evidently have not visited the motherland lately..... PURE? YEA RIGHT! The girls over there are just as bad or as good as the girls over here sweetheart, hate to burst your bubble. 😛

 

[lilpakichic]

LOL ok guys I was OBVIOUSLY joking..im not that big of a loser (ex. closing my eyes when a desi girl walks by LOL)....but sadly thats how some DESI guys do think and i was just tryin to give an example of an extreme.

but seriously and ironically Pakistani girls are definitly not pure. man they're worse than here. if they find out that you have a US passport and your an M.D. they're just going to marry you because of that...and once they get citizenship they would leave you...that happens so many times...so man be careful if you do go back to the homeland to find a wife. yes there are good choices there but you do have to be careful. there are some girls here as the above post mentioned that are ABD who are more traditional than girls in the homeland...just have to find the right one. having said all that, some desi girls here are very liberal and do act a bit sl*tty, they won't take **** from you at all, so don't expect them to cook food for you or anythin. some girls from overseas have the "can't live without you" mentality from all the love bull-**** escapist bollywood movies they've seen but girls here have the "can't live with you" mentality so be prepared for that my friend.

personally im going for the traditional wife whether she is a ABD or FOB...and let it be known to all the desi girls out there..i will treat my future wife like a RANI...a QUEEN..if she wants to work she can, but after a long hard days of work I'll come home and cook the food for her, and feed it to her with my own hands, we'll go out holding hands under the moonlight, won't let her EVER be sad, plus i'll suck it up and be man and watch all the shahrukh khan movies she wants to watch, and even after all that...I'll consider myself to be the luckiest man alive 😍

aww not so bad at all

 

[LadyBulldog]

personally im going for the traditional wife whether she is a ABD or FOB...and let it be known to all the desi girls out there..i will treat my future wife like a RANI...a QUEEN..if she wants to work she can, but after a long hard days of work I'll come home and cook the food for her, and feed it to her with my own hands, we'll go out holding hands under the moonlight, won't let her EVER be sad, plus i'll suck it up and be man and watch all the shahrukh khan movies she wants to watch, and even after all that...I'll consider myself to be the luckiest man alive 😍

Stud!


ahh, shah rukh, 😍

 

[QofQuimica]

Yeah, I definately think there is. Many of them have heard of "arranged marraige" and have a negative connotation behind it. It's just the way it is. But in all honesty the definition has greatly changed in our generation.

I don't think that is true at all. There are both advantages and disadvantages to the Indian system compared with the American one; it's not like all of our marriages go so happily ever after and last until death do us part in this country, even though the spouses are so madly in love when they get married. 🙄 And I'd sure love to finally bring home a guy that I knew my parents liked. Just once! 😛

I'm not Indian, but I work with several, and the ones who are married all had arranged marriages. But like you said, it's not like they were forced to marry some girl against their will. Their families introduced them to several girls, and they (and the girls) had every right to turn any or all prospective spouses down for any reason. My best friend's parents wanted him to marry a girl they introduced him to last year when he went home to visit, and she wanted to marry him too, but he didn't want to marry her, so he didn't. But eventually, when his parents find the right girl, then he will marry her. (He's FOB.) I did introduce him to one ABCD, but it didn't go well, even though she was really cute. She doesn't even like Indian food, and she hates science. I asked his parents once to find a guy for me, and they thought that was hysterical, but I was only half kidding. 😛

 

[priyanka]

sounds like you want a slave, not a *wife*

you know, you could just hire a maid to do this type of stuff

tinkkkiieeeeeeeeeee 👍 😍 😍 😍 🙂

 

[LUBDUBB]

Hey dudes


Have you guys thought about going the traditional way of going back to pakistan/india/bangladesh and finding someone there(daughter of a family-friend or neighbors) and then comming back to the states with your spouse? Or even going traditional way of mairrage in the U.S?

Now before you start blasting me I just have some concerns that i think we should think about:

-Did you think about how much more you could focus on your studies by avoiding girl maintainence in college?

-Do you think that they would be too different culturally from us?(common...they are pretty damn liberal and modern there too...i ain't marrying no damn village girl)

-What if you don't find the "right" person by the time you turn 25(i am still 20) and you want to start having a family life?

-Do you think that there will be a stigma amongst your friends(white) if you got married the traditional way?

Dude, you need to go somewhere and get laid. 👍

 

[DieselPetrolGrl]

That's another thing, a lot of desi girls think they are no decent guys in the world.... that sucks that we get judged by some of the worst specimens ;-) haha. but in all honesty, there are some of us that are decent.

but no JITT!

you might be decent but none of you have the whole package

 

[swifteagle43]

but no JITT!

you might be decent but none of you have the whole package

Maybe its not the jitt effect you are looking for. Have you ever thought about dating white guys?

 

[Old_Mil]

I have climbed the mountain and received enlightenment.

...Most Indian guys who grow up in the US turn out to be either culturally Indian and conservative, or culturally American and conservative. I really don't know any who - at least in how they lead their personal lives - would be classified as liberal.

...Most Indian girls who grow up in the US turn out to be either culturally Indian and conservative, or culturally American and liberal.

If you're culturally Indian and conservative, you don't have much of a problem as - whether you're a male or female - you can seek out a future spouse amongst your contemporaries here or in the old country. The girls who end up culturally American and liberal usually end up finding some frozen-in-a-cryogenic-chamber-since-the-60's hippie "arteeeeest" with long hair to run around with. However, if you're a culturally American but conservative Indian guy you're going to be incompatible both with the girls you grew up with here and the ones from the old country and might as well not waste your time dating Indian girls.

 

[bidster]

I have climbed the mountain and received enlightenment.

...Most Indian guys who grow up in the US turn out to be either culturally Indian and conservative, or culturally American and conservative. I really don't know any who - at least in how they lead their personal lives - would be classified as liberal.

...Most Indian girls who grow up in the US turn out to be either culturally Indian and conservative, or culturally American and liberal.

😕 I'm pretty sure I disagree with those constrained classifications, but can you specify what you count as "liberal" and "conservative" behavior anyway?

 

[junebuguf]

Being an Indian-American guy or ABCD or whatever is tough man....Indian girls here are way more high maintenance than they ever admit ..or maybe thats just the type-A, OCD pre-med girls I've met. That said, I would never get married to an *Indian* Indian girl. I know of a couple of people who married that way and got dumped after like 6 months. And white girls are just too different....the older I get, the sexier hinglish sounds.

 

[Old_Mil]

😕 I'm pretty sure I disagree with those constrained classifications, but can you specify what you count as "liberal" and "conservative" behavior anyway?

It's easier to define such things empirically, and even in doing so it's difficult to come up with a comprehensive list.

When it comes to relationships someone who leads a "conservative" personal life will to one degree or another...

- see dating as a process leading to marriage.
- the idea of "we" will play a large factor in how such a person views relationships.
- what each person can give to a relationship will factor into their decision making.
- believes in monogamous dating relationships.
- believe in healthy parameters for sexual activity.
- believe that the preferred method to raise children is in a two parent home with a father and mother.

...while someone who leads a "liberal" personal life.

- see dating as a recreational activity through which to have fun, not necessarily pursue a serious relationship leading to marriage.
- "I" and "You" will be the primary ideas behind such a person's view of relationships.
- what I can get out of a relationship will factor into this person's decision making.
- believe in serial monogamy or pursue polygamous dating relationships.
- view sex as a recreational activity and reject to one extent or another most or all restrictions on such activity.
- reject the idea that there is a preferred method by which children can be raised and be perfectly comfortable with - if not actively pursue - single parenthood.

This is in no way a comprehensive list, and not every comment above applies to everyone in each group. Also, perhaps there are better terms than "liberal" and "conservative" given the highly politicized nature of these two terms these days but it gives you a general idea what I'm talking about.

 

[junebuguf]

That list isn't merely stereotyping, its downright wrong. As someone who considers himself to be pretty liberal and also knows other Indians who would be considered liberal, let me take some of the points your categorize as liberal in turn:

'- see dating as a recreational activity through which to have fun, not necessarily pursue a serious relationship leading to marriage.'

I don't see it as a recreational activity...maybe back when I was 20, but not now at 25. What you hope to gain from dating depends on your age not personal ideology. The older you get, the more meaningful those relationships neccessarily become. Most of my Indian friends think accordingly.

' "I" and "You" will be the primary ideas behind such a person's view of relationships.' & 'what I can get out of a relationship will factor into this person's decision making.'

These are just plain selfish and can often be found in the immature. As you mature, you realize that relationships are really about sacrifice. This is universal across liberal and conservative ideologies, and assigning solely to one is rhetoric masquerading as social commentary.


'- believe in serial monogamy or pursue polygamous dating relationships.
- view sex as a recreational activity and reject to one extent or another most or all restrictions on such activity.'

This is reckless behavior. I don't know of anyone who rejects all restrictions on sex. And virtually everyone I know would only be in a monogamous relationship.

'reject the idea that there is a preferred method by which children can be raised and be perfectly comfortable with - if not actively pursue - single parenthood.'

I know of no one who actually wants to be a single parent. I do know of a lot of people who believe that there is more than one way to raise a child.

I can't comment on your opinion on what contrues a conservative, but perhaps someone here can shoot that down as well. In conclusion, your list is positively asinine.

 

[tinkerbelle]

right here.

*tink now keeps and eye out for Indy *

 

[junebuguf]

I just read your earilier post and realize now what a waste of time it was to be arguing with someone who doles out such gems as 'The girls who end up culturally American and liberal usually end up finding some frozen-in-a-cryogenic-chamber-since-the-60's hippie "arteeeeest" with long hair to run around with' and quotes bad country songs in his signature.

 

[tinkerbelle]

almost none
there may be some like 1% but they dont have the JITT effect* at all
JITT = see lounge for definition

Hi Diesel 🙂 What's up? Hmm... ok, I'm off to check the lounge for the term JITT

tinkkkiieeeeeeeeeee

Priiiii. You left yesterday when i wasn't paying attention. I barely got to talk to you 🙁 If I ever win the lottery, i'm planning a trip to cali so we can chill out together 😍

 

[IndyZX]

i think i may be the only indian dude here who has never worried that much about this stuff. i figure it will all work out at some point. im not in a relationship now, but i know that i have plenty to offer, so whats the rush?