Really hating this right now

[Sabriel415]

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I've been in a funk for months. I took a trip abroad for spring break to get away from things and it made me realize that I really, really HATE being in vet school. Part of it is because I am exhausted all of the time, I did very poorly on a few exams because there is no time to eat, sleep, study, and study everything all at the same time, the culture in the teaching hospital is **** with 4th years crying almost daily, and not to mention I'll be $200K in debt when I am done. I am at the point where I am thinking "why am I spending so much money to be miserable the rest of my life?" ALSO not to mention the PSLF and PAYE loan repayment programs are in huge trouble with the current administration, which I was relying on. I thought I could accept the debt and all that comes with being a vet, but now I am not so sure. Hard work does not scare me and I've done my fair share, but I will never be the type of vet who can be on-call 365 days a year with no time off and no time to pee or eat while being paid crap to be treated like crap by an old practice owner who doesn't want to do it anymore and ungrateful clients. I value traveling and exploring the world and life is too short to wait until I am retired to do it, and it just doesn't seem like vet med is compatible with that life value and I am not finding many career options that would allow me to do that and still pay loan bills.

I feel like all I want to do is get away from everything and go back to South America, perfect my Spanish, see all the countries, be with my significant other who is long distance, and never think about vet med again and go own a hostel or something.

I'm in my 2nd year and will be taking a year off for a dual degree masters program next fall, so I am currently trying to decide if I need time away from vet school or if I made the wrong career choice.

Has anyone else been in this position where they truly *hate* being in vet school, and how did you figure out what was best for you? What did you do to change your view on life? I feel like I am on a very negative spiral and it is not getting better even with counseling. I am very stuck and need help!

 

[Trilt]

Vet school can really freaking suck. I don't know that I hated it, but I definitely had swathes of exceedingly negative funks.

I dealt with it by not caring about grades and spending a lot of time doing the "fun" stuff... shadowing, wetlabs, etc. Hobbies. Travel. Beer. Actually a whole lot of beer and cooking.

During clinics I tracked zoo even though I planned on doing GP/exotics partially because it got me out of the miserable teaching hospital more, and it was the best thing I could have done for my mental health. The people who spend months in a row in that overwhelming house of paperwork and egos without strangling someone amaze me.

I work in GP now and definitely don't work 365 days a year with no time off. I've taken weekend trips almost every month for the last little while, visiting family or SDNers or spending time with my partner. I'm generally much much happier than I was in school. So there was a light at the end of the tunnel for me, at least.

 

[Lab Vet]

Take heart, OP. I didn't hate vet school, but it definitely was not 'fun' for me. I had to work incredibly hard to do well. Practically every waking moment of my life, with the exception of sleep and occasional time off with friends/family, was devoted to learning/performing well in veterinary school. I enrolled in veterinary school later in life- vet med is a second career for me. I'm glad I did it (graduating in May), and would do it again. That being said, I make a point of telling folks (for the sake of sharing solidarity with other folks who may feel the same) that vet school was a struggle, I didn't love every moment, and questioned my satisfaction/sacrifice ratio many times while in school. When I was deep in the pit of self-doubt, I actively recalled my mission and motivation for pursuing vet med in the first place. This is ultimately what drove my motivation to finish. I also reached out to faculty, friends, and family who made time to truly listen to what I had to say, and not judge me for my negativity. These people were life savers, and made all the difference in the world. I wish I could tell you that it gets better. For some folks, it might. In my opinion, the struggles don't go away- they just change. Fourth year brought about one of the greatest career and personal upsets of my life. Had it not been for the support of key individuals, I don't know how I would have gotten back on the horse and resumed the fight. Human beings are resilient creatures. A faculty member from my previous life once told me (I'll never forget this piece of advice)- "you'd be amazed what you can recover from." He was right.

I exited my PhD with a MS degree after EIGHT years of investment. That is a huge burden of academic inertia to let go. It took me years to sort out whether or not I was unhappy, or simply not cut out for the life of an academic scientist. It was an incredibly difficult decision to walk away (many tears were shed), but I'm glad that I did. It was the right call, and I have no regrets. Think hard about vet school- be honest about what you like about it, and what you don't. Remember that it's temporary, and that vet school does not equal the practice of veterinary medicine (in whatever role you choose). That being said, if you're truly unhappy, don't be ashamed of your desire to bail. You only have one life- you are beholden to yourself for happiness, and no one else. Lean on your friends, faculty, and family for support. These people want to help you, and have your best interests at heart. Decide for yourself what makes you happy, and move in that direction. Every individual has a different solution to the satisfaction/sacrifice ratio- decide yours, and make decisions in accordance with those values.

Veterinary school is a very difficult slog- more so for some, than others. You're not alone in your struggle.

 

[CalliopeDVM]

Oh, second year is the worst! I cried multiple times in second year, as did just about everyone else in my class. Take heart -- just about everyone feels that way, and it does get better as you move into 3rd and 4th year and everything really begins to fall together. There certainly were times I hated vet school, and there were lots of times I didn't like it at all......OK, I don't think I ever liked it, but it was something I had to do to become a vet. It was hard, both from the work/time/stress of school, and from the waiting for my goal of being a vet.

Clinical medicine is not at all like vet school, and the great thing about it is that there are so many different ways to be a vet -- different types of clinics, locations, and actual tasks/responsibilities. If you don't want to be on call, you don't need to take a job with on call requirements. If you don't want to work in a multi-vet clinic, there are small solo vet clinics who want to expand a little. If you don't want to work for a boss who's been out for 40 years, there are owners who've been out for 6 or 8 years.

 

[Caia]

I truly hated vet school. There were a number of times where I was very close to walking away from it all. Sometimes depression was a component, sometimes it wasn't. I even really hated it up until the end of third year when you're supposed to enjoy more clinical relevance. February of 3rd year I almost walked out.

What stopped me from walking during those years?
1: My prospects if I left. What I wanted most was to find a job that had decent pay (75+k) that I could live with and start enjoying my life with my husband and our animals. Nothing, not even a community/technical college program could graduate me before or even at the same time as my DVM degree (I have a Bachelor's of Science that means nothing unless I go to grad school). That was honestly what made me change my mind -- that the escape in the short term wouldn't be there, never mind the long term.

2: Spending time in a clinic in my field of interest that I enjoyed working at. It helped me remind myself that I do enjoy vet med, I just really hate the process. I also focused on learning things more for what I want to do and did less memorizing of all the extraneous details that I felt clogged everything up. My grades were not as good, but I had my sanity and a practical, working knowledge.

I have really enjoyed fourth year (but I have not had to worry about students crying everyday so there is that) because it has had relevance to me. I'm starting to itch now at the end because I really want to make my own decisions about things, but that comes with the end of any program.

So ultimately, I think taking some time to consider what you would do if you left vet school tomorrow may be helpful as well as finding a way to connect with an area that you're interested in. That is what kept me alive.

My PM box is open if you ever want to vent.

 

[racccjlm]

It's important to distinguish between your current feelings for school, and your feelings for the profession (they can be seemingly impossible to separate when severely sleep deprived/exhausted). School is temporary, the career is long-term. What motivated you to join the profession? What experience do you have shadowing/working in vet clinics? As mentioned above, there are certainly avenues can pursue that are not 24/7/365. Are there veterinarians you know and trust (outside of school) that you can talk to candidly?

 

[meningealworm]

Spring semester of 2nd year was the worst one for me. It was a lot of classroom time and was a tough slog to get through. I'm someone who *has* loved vet school for the most part, and I hated that semester. I can't comment on the specifics of your vet hospital and program, but for me, everything got much, much better after that semester. Classroom information started to become more cohesive and relevant, and I loved being on the clinic floor. I guess my only advice would be to keep your eye on the end goal and try to remember why you wanted it in the first place. If your goals have changed, you're better off recognizing that earlier rather than later, and don't be afraid to shift your course if it's what you really want.

 

[Ashgirl]

I've been in a funk for months. I took a trip abroad for spring break to get away from things and it made me realize that I really, really HATE being in vet school. Part of it is because I am exhausted all of the time, I did very poorly on a few exams because there is no time to eat, sleep, study, and study everything all at the same time, the culture in the teaching hospital is **** with 4th years crying almost daily, and not to mention I'll be $200K in debt when I am done. I am at the point where I am thinking "why am I spending so much money to be miserable the rest of my life?" ALSO not to mention the PSLF and PAYE loan repayment programs are in huge trouble with the current administration, which I was relying on. I thought I could accept the debt and all that comes with being a vet, but now I am not so sure. Hard work does not scare me and I've done my fair share, but I will never be the type of vet who can be on-call 365 days a year with no time off and no time to pee or eat while being paid crap to be treated like crap by an old practice owner who doesn't want to do it anymore and ungrateful clients. I value traveling and exploring the world and life is too short to wait until I am retired to do it, and it just doesn't seem like vet med is compatible with that life value and I am not finding many career options that would allow me to do that and still pay loan bills.

I feel like all I want to do is get away from everything and go back to South America, perfect my Spanish, see all the countries, be with my significant other who is long distance, and never think about vet med again and go own a hostel or something.

I'm in my 2nd year and will be taking a year off for a dual degree masters program next fall, so I am currently trying to decide if I need time away from vet school or if I made the wrong career choice.

Has anyone else been in this position where they truly *hate* being in vet school, and how did you figure out what was best for you? What did you do to change your view on life? I feel like I am on a very negative spiral and it is not getting better even with counseling. I am very stuck and need help!

I've been where you have been. And you should know that it is okay to hate vet school. It is possible for you to hate every moment of vet school but still love being a vet. Why? Because vet school, as told above, is not you being a veterinarian. It's a middle man, and sometimes a craptastic one at that. This situation you are in is temporary ( but I know it doesn't feel that way).

Second year is extremely tough. The novelty of vet school has worn off, but you quite haven't gotten to the meat of medicine. You are surrounded by lists of endless facts you have to memorize, and there is no light at the end of the tunnel that you see.

When I really hated vet school I felt guilty. Did this mean if I hated this that I am not cut out for this career? Honestly, I figured out that I would be okay during off-campus externships and clinical experiences. I finally saw the light, and I knew that there was something better waiting for me. Can you go somewhere this summer and see if it sparks your interest in vet med again?

 

[Armyhealth]

How about army vet? Full scholarship, for three years. 2200+ per month while in school. Very rarely are you ever on call unless there is an emergency with a military working dog. Get to travel, doubt boredom will be an issue.

 

[Bismarck]

How about army vet? Full scholarship, for three years. 2200+ per month while in school.

Yep, that's true. Tough to get though, and OP is past the point of applying for this scholarship. Was very happy with this arrangement while in school.

Very rarely are you ever on call unless there is an emergency with a military working dog.

This isn't true for anyone who is deployed or situated in a forward area like I am. I am the sole veterinarian on call for everything including pets in my AO for the entirety of this current assignment.I have taken some interesting cases that would be referrals CONUS FWIW, so it's not all bad for learning.

Get to travel, doubt boredom will be an issue.

Depending on where you end up, frequent TDYs for audits could burn you out, especially if Public Health/Food Safety is not your interest and you have a family you are away from.