It never really hit me until I just recently got my first acceptance. A 5-6 hour time difference and 20 hour plane rides don't really seem to do relationships any good. I hope this won't be my only option, but talk about mixed feelings. Anybody else floating in this same boat?
Don't worry about it... med-school kills all the unimportant relationships anyway no matter what your proximity. Only the best of them survive. Are you in an Israeli school? 20 hours seems about right for it.
I haven't got any acceptances yet, but this is an issue that's the elephant in the room. And as I apply to med school, my sig other is applying to grad school all over the US and even to Oxford....I don't know what will happen, but if the Gods are kind and merciful, then it will all work out. I can tell you, though, that I do know of couples who've stuck it out successfully with patience, tenacity and huge phone bills! Also, where exactly are you going that there is a 20 hr flight and a 5-6 hr time difference? Is that even possible in the continental US??
Not to sound like the wet blanket but in situations like this for the relationship to work it's gonna require one person giving up a lot more than the other. It can happen but the odds are not in your favor.
Yea, I'm in a similar boat here. I'm applying all over the place while my sig other is in the direct med program (Rice/Baylor) and will be staying around here for the next 6 years. Next year will be intersting though, whereever i end up.
Sigh, sometimes relationships and following your dreams don't mix. My fiance and I made it through 9 months of being apart in Oregon/Alabama, and we'd only been dating 3 months before he left. I could have waited forever to be with him, but I'm glad I don't have to! However, now he is in law school and I am applying to the only med school in town... I hope I get in.
If worse comes to worse and you two break up, you can always use the doctor thing to reel someone new in....that would probably get you a golddigger but hell you can have some fun for a little while.
well. i am going through a very similar situation. my sig other went off to dental school last August while i just received an acceptance to med school on the opposite end of the country. i got rejected from the school in his town. it was the hardest thing in the world to tell him that i'm not coming over, but we're settling into the idea that we won't see each other much for the next 3 years. but we have been dating for 3 years before, so i'm staying optomistic. it's a hard situation. only time will tell. good luck. p.s: are you in Israel?
I've tried two long-distance relationships now, with school being the barrier in each. One of them, which lasted for 5 years, didn't work out once we turned long distance. The other lasted for about 2 months, we were together a year before that. There is really only one way that it can work without either of you having to give up too much to be worth it. You have to have trust. Lots of it. You will find this out shortly after being away from each other. I think if you love someone enough it is worth giving it a shot, and keep in mind that if you guys can make it through this kind of ordeal, then there probably isn't much that you won't be able to make it through.
my class has a bunch of long distance relationships... mine didn't end up working out, but honestly, i think it was for the better anyway. and i agree, the best relationships will survive. if yours doesn't last, it's all for the better. it's definitely better than breaking up a couple of years later when you're in residency and really won't be able ot meet anyone (also, don't look to your classmates for potentials... most of them come in with relationships and i think it would be a headache to get together with another med school student)
Thanks for the input everyone. I may have exagerated on the flight time a little. However, I am not in Israel, but am rather from Hawaii. One of those tiny rocks in the middle of the Pacific. Total travel time to the east coast is about 20 hours. Anyways, I think it will be just a matter of trying a long distance relationship out and seeing if it works. Interestingly, I would say about 30% of our 3 year relationship has been long distance. Outrageous phone bills, here I come again.
You should get cellphones with free long distance and free member to member minutes. Most companies do this--you can pay for a cheap plan and talk as much as you want. And if you get a phone that takes pictures, you can send each other pictures!
If you two are serious, she could go with you wherever you go (unless other factors wont' let that happen)
My high school bf and I broke up shortly after I left town for college. My boyfriend as of yesterday broke up w/me b/c he "needs to move out of town and needs to do it alone." But I had a feeling we'd break up if I left town for med school. I have a feeling the same thing will happen again in med school, then residency. I can't win.
The stress of not knowing where I was going to end up for medical school ended a relationship I had of 2.5 years. It blows, make sure you and your significant other want to live in the same place.
If you can't change your situation, change your attitude about the situation! I think that 1-2 yr relationships (and lots of them, but not all at once) are great! You get to enjoy the best two years of a relationship and then move on to the next as soon as circumstances bring you to part. Enjoy life for what it is RIGHT NOW, don't sweat what will be... if you're doing a good job of creating your future, you won't have to worry about whether or not you'll have someone at your side. Because you will-- and there's nothing that states it necessarily has to be the person you're with right this moment!
