secondaries...how far should i go?

[sdnstud]

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most secondaries have word limits. if i go into detail on one thing, i can't cover everything i want to say. if i write in concise, to the point language, i can say more but in less depth. below is an example:

"I am impressed by the student body?s commitment to serving the community. Einstein Community Health Outreach (ECHO), dedicated to providing to the economic disadvantaged is truly inspiring as I understand the importance of medical care for the underprivileged, especially after coming from that background myself. I hope to bring my experience and talents to ECHO and contribute to its future endeavors.

this is the concise form. after writing this, i feel that i hvae expressed MY INTEREST in ECHO, instead of WHY i am interested in ECHO. Alternatively, I can go into details, telling a story of how being uninsured most of my childhood has affect me and how my personal experience inspired me to join ECHO. If i do this however, this will take up the whole essay and i can't say much else.

what do you think guys? focus on one thing...or get your point across?

 

[Caesarsgrl]

Well I'm not sure but if it would make you feel better while staying concise you can mention.... "My interest for echo stems from personal childhood experiences in a medically underprivelaged community..." I don't know if that helps. You don't have to go over your whole story just state the point of it so they know and then if they decide to interview you you can explain the experience that led to your interest then.

nice start in theexample though 👍

 

[derf]

most secondaries have word limits. if i go into detail on one thing, i can't cover everything i want to say. if i write in concise, to the point language, i can say more but in less depth. below is an example:

"I am impressed by the student body?s commitment to serving the community. Einstein Community Health Outreach (ECHO), dedicated to providing to the economic disadvantaged is truly inspiring as I understand the importance of medical care for the underprivileged, especially after coming from that background myself. I hope to bring my experience and talents to ECHO and contribute to its future endeavors.

this is the concise form. after writing this, i feel that i hvae expressed MY INTEREST in ECHO, instead of WHY i am interested in ECHO. Alternatively, I can go into details, telling a story of how being uninsured most of my childhood has affect me and how my personal experience inspired me to join ECHO. If i do this however, this will take up the whole essay and i can't say much else.

what do you think guys? focus on one thing...or get your point across?

I always try to throw at least two things in there, such as curriculum and clinical training, etc. If its really limited in space, I would say something explicit and really quickly mention something implicit like location. But always try to talk about two things, at least. oh, also, I wouldn't talk about the student body and other stuff like that, but rather what the school can offer you. you gotta butter them up with their 'uncompromised' educational philosophy, 'unparalled' clinical training, etc