Secondary Essay: Adversity Topic Ideas

[crathnam]

I know a lot of students haven't had a significant challenge in their life in the sense that they haven't stood up to social norms (by being gay, lesbian, etc.) or had a parent pass away; I fall into this category. I can't think of an outstanding challenge I have faced but when I do think about adversity, what I think of is the expectation of getting an arranged marriage.

In my culture, marrying within a specific "clan" or "group" of people is religiously important. I know many would say it's my life and I should make my own decision but it's more than that. A wife plays important roles in religious ceremonies; my parents explain it as being a link in my family's chain, that getting married is not only for me but for my ancestors. I am also a pretty religious person. So as my adversity, I was going to write about how I am faced with the challenge of finding a way to uphold my religious responsibility but also be happy/choose what I do with my life.

My only reservations about this topic is that it may be too personal/religiously related and may make adcoms feel uneasy/awkward. Does anyone have any opinions on this?

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[phunky]

I'd write an essay about adversity that you've overcome. Not one you're currently facing.

 

[crathnam]

I'd write an essay about adversity that you've overcome. Not one you're currently facing.

you're right. prompts specifically say to write about something I've overcome. What would you say about writing about something religious in general?

 

[phunky]

you're right. prompts specifically say to write about something I've overcome. What would you say about writing about something religious in general?

I'd say that's totally fine.

 

[ThisCouldBeYou]

Actually, can't you avoid the religious aspect and just write about being directed to marry someone from a specific clan/group? That certainly does address the adversity issue. Shakespeare did a great job and although there was a monk as one of the characters, the story never mentioned religion.

 

[crathnam]

Actually, can't you avoid the religious aspect and just write about being directed to marry someone from a specific clan/group? That certainly does address the adversity issue. Shakespeare did a great job and although there was a monk as one of the characters, the story never mentioned religion.

the only reason i mention the religious aspect is because that is the only motivation for the arranged marriage. If i leave that part out, it leaves my argument a little baseless. I wanted to talk about religious responsibility as a reason i would go along with an arranged marriage. Could you elaborate a little more on how i could still tailor this towards something i have overcome?

Also, another idea I had. In high school, I was called down in the middle of my dissection to the schools conference room(no windows, one door, pretty bleak looking). A man in a Hawaiian shirt shook my hand and told me that he was part of the secret service and had a few questions to ask me; there was another man in the room with him. For the next 2 hours, I was drilled with questions, that I believed were random. It was basically as if he wanted me to talk and see if I said anything that he could use against me. I was scared out of my mind, trembling the whole time because WHAT DID I DO?!? In the end, it turned out that they were questioning me about counterfeiting money and asking if I knew if 2 of my friends were doing it. No one was arrested and no one actually did anything illegal, it was just an investigation. The reason they thought my friend was part of it was because he was a manager at Taco Bell in a bad area so they taught him how to tell fake money from real money. He was teaching me about the magnetic strip in money in class and someone thought it was worth investigating after overhearing our conversation. The whole experience taught me how to be more confident in myself when I know I didn't do anything wrong even when faced against federal authority(the highest form of authority in the US). I learned other things too, like being cooperative helps and understanding when and when not to stand against authority (in the sense that I knew I was right but it was better in this case to not stand against them and get in more trouble just because I was giving them attitude). What do you guys think about this? I know it sounds like straight out of a movie (21 LOL) but it actually happened and it scared the living hell out of me.

 

[ThisCouldBeYou]

the only reason i mention the religious aspect is because that is the only motivation for the arranged marriage. If i leave that part out, it leaves my argument a little baseless. I wanted to talk about religious responsibility as a reason i would go along with an arranged marriage. Could you elaborate a little more on how i could still tailor this towards something i have overcome?

Also, another idea I had. In high school, I was called down in the middle of my dissection to the schools conference room(no windows, one door, pretty bleak looking). A man in a Hawaiian shirt shook my hand and told me that he was part of the secret service and had a few questions to ask me; there was another man in the room with him. For the next 2 hours, I was drilled with questions, that I believed were random. It was basically as if he wanted me to talk and see if I said anything that he could use against me. I was scared out of my mind, trembling the whole time because WHAT DID I DO?!? In the end, it turned out that they were questioning me about counterfeiting money and asking if I knew if 2 of my friends were doing it. No one was arrested and no one actually did anything illegal, it was just an investigation. The reason they thought my friend was part of it was because he was a manager at Taco Bell in a bad area so they taught him how to tell fake money from real money. He was teaching me about the magnetic strip in money in class and someone thought it was worth investigating after overhearing our conversation. The whole experience taught me how to be more confident in myself when I know I didn't do anything wrong even when faced against federal authority(the highest form of authority in the US). I learned other things too, like being cooperative helps and understanding when and when not to stand against authority (in the sense that I knew I was right but it was better in this case to not stand against them and get in more trouble just because I was giving them attitude). What do you guys think about this? I know it sounds like straight out of a movie (21 LOL) but it actually happened and it scared the living hell out of me.

You could write about doing things "for the family" even though in the old-fashioned US, in general, marriages aren't arranged. You sense a difference between your family values and how the country, as an independent democracy, operate.

Come to think of it, there are plenty of religions that "expect" the children to marry within their religion, but that isn't as strict as it once was. And it's not like you have a gf who isn't XX, it's just the concept you dislike. Does that mean you also dislike some of the other expectations and requirements as well? (like Jewish wives may not get a divorce unless their husband gives permission or like Mormon temple-goers are required to have a year of service and women wear skirts/dresses not pants or like Church of Scientology members are required to raise their children as Scientologist and donate XX% of their income.) Please note: these examples may not be at all accurate!

I like this topic as the challenge to write about. Sounds much more thoughtful and shows you've reflected on this for awhile. The other sounds not much different from having a cop stop you on a routine night.

 

[cupcakesandcadavers]

some advice i was given from someone who interviews at 3 top 30 medical schools is that a lot of people who are URMs are not actually underprivileged or any less off than anyone else. but their heritage is and that is what is played up.
sometimes the actually applicant is not as privileged and thats fine, but for those who are just as well off play off their background.
i know plenty of students are from URMs and their families are just as or better off than mine. yet, they still have an advantage.

on a side note, i find it really sad that people who go through true adversity have an "advantage". Why should i be fretting about not having a heart wrenching story to get me into medical school when i have two loving parents, both alive and well and i can afford to see them even when i go to college far away.
perspective

 

[crathnam]

You could write about doing things "for the family" even though in the old-fashioned US, in general, marriages aren't arranged. You sense a difference between your family values and how the country, as an independent democracy, operate.

Come to think of it, there are plenty of religions that "expect" the children to marry within their religion, but that isn't as strict as it once was. And it's not like you have a gf who isn't XX, it's just the concept you dislike. Does that mean you also dislike some of the other expectations and requirements as well? (like Jewish wives may not get a divorce unless their husband gives permission or like Mormon temple-goers are required to have a year of service and women wear skirts/dresses not pants or like Church of Scientology members are required to raise their children as Scientologist and donate XX% of their income.) Please note: these examples may not be at all accurate!

I like this topic as the challenge to write about. Sounds much more thoughtful and shows you've reflected on this for awhile. The other sounds not much different from having a cop stop you on a routine night.

It's not that I "dislike" the religious expectations, it's just that I don't want to go against what I believe in (both ways: my religion and my belief that I should choose what makes me happy). It's two things where I have to compromise one for the other. That's what I don't like about it[the situation not my religion]. The only question I have is, the prompts ask for obstacles I have overcome not am currently overcoming. Any ideas on how to tailor my essay to fit the prompt?

 

[crathnam]

some advice i was given from someone who interviews at 3 top 30 medical schools is that a lot of people who are URMs are not actually underprivileged or any less off than anyone else. but their heritage is and that is what is played up.
sometimes the actually applicant is not as privileged and thats fine, but for those who are just as well off play off their background.
i know plenty of students are from URMs and their families are just as or better off than mine. yet, they still have an advantage.

on a side note, i find it really sad that people who go through true adversity have an "advantage". Why should i be fretting about not having a heart wrenching story to get me into medical school when i have two loving parents, both alive and well and i can afford to see them even when i go to college far away.
perspective

That is a great point, thank you so much for sharing. And I agree with you completely. It's not my fault fate hasn't hit me hard yet.

 

[DokterMom]

It's not that I "dislike" the religious expectations, it's just that I don't want to go against what I believe in (both ways: my religion and my belief that I should choose what makes me happy). It's two things where I have to compromise one for the other. That's what I don't like about it[the situation not my religion]. The only question I have is, the prompts ask for obstacles I have overcome not am currently overcoming. Any ideas on how to tailor my essay to fit the prompt?

It sounds like your analysis is telling you why your situation doesn't fit the prompt. You are wrestling with a difficult dilemma - balancing your conflicting beliefs and finding a solution that respects your heritage and culture while also fitting your American life and belief system.

Once you find your solution, you may have a good story. But until then, you've got a 'diversity' story, not an 'adversity' story --

 

[crathnam]

It sounds like your analysis is telling you why your situation doesn't fit the prompt. You are wrestling with a difficult dilemma - balancing your conflicting beliefs and finding a solution that respects your heritage and culture while also fitting your American life and belief system.

Once you find your solution, you may have a good story. But until then, you've got a 'diversity' story, not an 'adversity' story --

that's a great way to sum up everything i said. thank you for that .

what i'm thinking so far is that my situation is one that i have had to deal with since i started to understand what culture is (probably 10 or 11). Although it wasn't marriage related at that time, there were other cultural aspects. Growing up was a journey of perseverance. As of now, i do understand and agree with getting an arranged marriage (which is the obstacle that i overcame by understanding that fulfilling my religious responsibility makes me happy and feel at ease) because it doesn't mean that i won't be happy with a future spouse. I was assuming that i would never be happy with anyone i am arranged with, which is a false assumption. So i talk about how i sought to find a balance and how, at the moment, i have come to accept it despite being born in the U.S. and growing up in a different culture than my parents. does that sound like a plausible idea for adversity?

 

[ThisCouldBeYou]

^crathnam, the way you've framed your situation here comes off really well. Go for it.

 

[crathnam]

^crathnam, the way you've framed your situation here comes off really well. Go for it.

thank you makes me feel a lot better writing this essay. you guys are awesome, thanks for all the help!