Hey, I too am in the same boat with the state vs. private and i have settled on Rochester over Upstate (which on top of being cheaper offered me an alumni scholarship for 4,000 a year...talk about waking up one morning and changing your mind...ugh). Some things to consider for the NY state schools...the state gov't just approved another $2000 increase in state tuition this year (as they did last year) and will most likely do this again for the next two years...essentially meaning that instead of the $11,000 price tag on two years ago, we'll be paying 18-19,000...they won't tell you that though...the admissions people at upstate tried to make is seem like it wouldn't happen...but it has already.
I called Rochester last week and told them my situation...i TOLD them that i thought i'd get the same education either place and i needed some proof that what they had would be worth the extra money (taking into account the rankings)...once i did that i felt much better about things because i have been sitting up for the last three weeks at night bouncing the money vs. ranking wild card around in my brain...and by telling Rochester (who gave me almost nothing in scholarship but lots of loans) how i really felt it was up to them to show me. I spent about 8 hours there on Friday talking to deans, students, doctors and it was enough to convince me that the debt is worth it for ME. The number of resources is incredible, they just added tons of new research space and are recruiting heavily for quality PhD's and MD's to fill the space. The Children's hospital just got $14,000,000 from some rich guy and they are building a new pediatric ICU on top of the new three floor wing (so it would be the fourth floor). Most importantly, the students i spoke to who complained about the costs, said that even though it is a lot to spend, they see their money come back into their programs every day.
Some people, including an advisory dean, did tell me that if I would be as happy at a state school...go for it. For me, I knew that the desire for the state school was 100% financially driven and that i would succeed only where I was most happy. Four years ago, I chose SUNY over Cornell not based on money but on where i felt most comfortable and even though some said i'd have a harder time getting into med school, i got into a bunch...but that was becasue i was happy and this goes to show you, that if you really want to be in LI, and you really aren't so sure about PBL, go to Stony Brook, and you'll get wherever you want to go in the long run.
I found this quote by Freud and it is something i have been clinging to for a few weeks, "When making a decision of minor importance, I have always found it advantageous to consider all the pros and cons. In vital matters, however, such as the choice of a mate or a profession, the decision should come from the unconscious, from somewhere within ourselves. In the important decisions of personal life, we should be governed, I think, by the deep inner needs of our nature"
Although I've done the math and I know i'll be paying out my ears for a long time, and maybe the list of pros for Upstate is just as long as the list at Rochester, i wasn't able to shake my desire to go to Rochester, and i'm sure that either choice would have been the right one...
that's all for my ramblings...hope you find peace with a decision soon. BingGirl