The "I'm not going to your vet school" letter

[pressmom]

Am I the only one who feels terrible writing these? I feel like Jade in ANTM when I'm saying "Thank you for believing in me." (props if you watch enough TV to get that reference) I've procrastinated on it enough so I'm writing it tonight. I want to make sure they replace me ASAP. It just feels weird when I (and so many other people) have worked hard to get in. I guess I just have to do what's right for me in the most polite way. Sigh.

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[msmrtrthnyllb]

It's the not the first one they'll get, and it's not the last.
They have a line of people they can still accept. No worries.

 

[kate_g]

So... I know exactly how you feel, and I initially felt some of the same agony myself, so I'm not making light of your feelings.

...But I really don't think the school cares that much. They expect it. That's the whole reason they bothered to make a waitlist. I doubt I'm *so* much more special than the next person on the list that it really makes any difference to them. And unless I mention it, probably four years from now nobody is even going to remember I applied, much less whether I sent a polite decline letter.

So, if they gave me a response card I'm checking "no" and putting it in the mail. If not, I'm sending a short, polite e-mail to the admissions coordinator just so they don't have to chase me down later to make sure.

My one exception is the school where I had a lot of contact with one faculty member on the admissions committee who arranged an extra tour for me, spoke with me several times on the phone, etc. I'm going to send him an e-mail letting him know about my decision and thanking him for his time, etc. But in that case I'm sending an e-mail to the students who took extra time to show me around, too.

 

[pressmom]

I know you guys are right. There is a very qualified person out there getting my seat and he/she will be happy to have it. Plus this happens all the time in the admissions process. But it's not about how it feels to them, it's about how it feels to me. I was lucky enough to get in my three top schools and the last few days of talking on the phone to them have been hard on me. (I even smoked a few cigarettes, Dad I hope you're not reading this.) I'm glad the decision has been made, but I'm not over it yet, I guess.

 

[QTkitty]

I felt really bad about writing those and basically did say "thank you for giving me this opportunity....bla bla bla...". Anyway, I totally got your Jade reference (I'm obsessed with ANTM), not to mention that her cycle was the merathon playing all day today on VH1

 

[ZoeyBay]

I watched the marathon! (well the last 3 episodes)

 

[sundoggie]

Hah!

I started to write the email three times yesterday and had to keep saving it instead of sending it. I just couldnt hit send because what if I'm making the wrong choice and how do I know where I will be happy or what if Penn didnt really mean it when they said I could go there..or ...or..or.

No...I'm not neurotic...not at all..

 

[JumptheMoon]

Hah!

I started to write the email three times yesterday and had to keep saving it instead of sending it. I just couldnt hit send because what if I'm making the wrong choice and how do I know where I will be happy or what if Penn didnt really mean it when they said I could go there..or ...or..or.

No...I'm not neurotic...not at all..

Aw Sundoggie, I hear you! I called Penn yesterday to make sure they'd received my deposit, which was a good thing because they hadn't! But the woman on the phone couldn't have been nicer. She said "Don't you worry about it! The most important thing is that we know you're accepting our offer; we won't give your seat away. I'll let you know when we get your deposit."

 

[sundoggie]

They are so nice there! I overnighted my deposit by Fedex because I am crazy like that. They got it this morning...so yay!

 

[JIKJen124]

I agonized over one of my letters - what to say, given how nice they were to me and how much they wanted to recruit me. In the end though, they know it's a competative process for schools to get the best candidates to come. Some they win, some they lose, it's all part of it.

 

[fromjersey]

Difficult.

 

[Capella]

Jersey, I'm beginning to sense you're a witty person…

 

[philomycus]

You could re-word this to:

This year I received 28 acceptances letters from veterinary schools all over the world. It was indeed an honor to be so enthusiastically welcomed by every school in the VMCAS. After many days of deliberating and soul searching, I regret to inform you that I will not be accepting your offer. The decision was a difficult one. I am in high regard of your school's reputation. Unfortunately, I can only attend one school. Best of luck in your endeavours to recruit students for your fall class.

SWEEEEEEETTT!

 

[fromjersey]

Jersey, I'm beginning to sense you're a witty person…

Oh, I think I am more of a SOUR GRAPE.

 

[Max Power]

they don't care. and even if they do, I doubt they care as much as us waitlisters waiting around while people pounder the wording of their letters declining a school.

haha sorry for sounding bitchy...tired of waiting!! And stalking the mailman

 

[fromjersey]

"Thank you for believing in me."

That sounds like the acceptance speech.

 

[philomycus]

Am I the only one who feels terrible writing these? I feel like Jade in ANTM when I'm saying "Thank you for believing in me." (props if you watch enough TV to get that reference) I've procrastinated on it enough so I'm writing it tonight. I want to make sure they replace me ASAP. It just feels weird when I (and so many other people) have worked hard to get in. I guess I just have to do what's right for me in the most polite way. Sigh.

Dude, chica, whatever. They don't care and won't care. They have probably 100 people waiting to take your seat. Just tell them you're not going. The end.


Let us alternate people have a fighting chance and don't worry that your dad saw the fact you might smoke.

 

[seaturtlegirl]

I too had a hard time writing these letters. I think this was because I worked my tail off to get in, and I never thought that I would be turning down ANY school. I was also scared of making the "wrong" choice...

That said, I was happy to know that it would be helping other highly deserving people get in off a waitlist. I know how lucky I was to have a choice, and I just thanked the schools for giving me the time of day! Besides, I know it could've just as easily been me waiting to hear about a waitlist...I'm rooting for ya', Philo!!!

 

[wivet2011]

Oh, I think I am more of a SOUR GRAPE. In my family, I am a rebel. Now, I have to study for the MCAT and apply to med-school. They are all cheering.

Obviously, vet school rejects have thick skins and other options. Otherwise, approximately 3000 applicants would be jumping off bridges every year. The Easter time headlines would read: The annual pilgrimage to the nearest high bridge has begun for those students who applied to veterinary school and didn't get in. It is unfortunate that without a place in this year's class that these students refused to live any more.

LOVE the headline I agree with Capella, ya seem witty...maybe a witty sour grape?

 

[seaturtlegirl]

I forgot to add: I think some schools do care. When I turned down LSU, I got an email from admissions asking why I chose not to attend.

 

[kate_g]

Dude, chica, whatever. They don't care and won't care. They have probably 100 people waiting to take your seat. Just tell them you're not going. The end.

Let us alternate people have a fighting chance and don't worry that your dad saw the fact you might smoke.

I know that rationalization isn't going to ease your anxiety, but it seems like quite a lot of schools are letting the responses pile up and won't make their waitlist offers until after the April 16 deadline passes. Less work for them, I guess, to send a batch of letters out all at once than to send a single one each time a decline notice comes in. So really as long as she doesn't ask for an extension beyond April 16, ceasing to agonize over her letters probably wouldn't hurry up your waiting at all... (And by the way too, I really do hope you get good news soon. Your squirrel is extremely cute. )

 

[fromjersey]

LOVE the headline I agree with Capella, ya seem witty...maybe a witty sour grape?

I am now inspired.

 

[Pennymare]

For vet schools, this is a part of every year's cycle---they're used to it. While I imagine they really want you and may want to know what influenced your decision, declining letters are nothing new to them.

Say thanks, decline, maybe throw in a reason, and send them your best wishes.

That was my email in a nutshell---it was literally 5-7 sentences at the very most. Almost every institution emailed me back with a very friendly note thanking me and wishing me good luck. If you get all grandiose about it, you will only be wasting everyone's time.

Oh, but I did enjoy Jersey's format

It's a new phase in your life. Seriously, c'est la vie.