to defer or not to defer...advice

[realitydenied]

hey guys im in need of some serious anonymous advice from some people who can relate.

here is my deal:
i was accepted to med school back in the fall and, until of late, had pretty much made up my mind that i was ready and pumped to get started. however, lately i have been having some second thoughts about my readiness to embark on my medical career. here are the reasons for my trepidaton:

1)i currently work in a research lab that i like and enjoy, at least a majority of time, the pay is decent enough and good insurance and i like where i live...i am working on a project that i started, alongside a postdoc, from the beginning. we have been working on the project for about 6 months and there have been a lot of setbacks and frustrations. after tons of tweeking, we are at the point where the project will really start to pick-up, leading to numerous publications , and be a lot of fun to work on for another year...or we are heading down a road of continual setbacks providing even more frustrations and would really suck...

2)i went to the dermatologist today and he wants me to try accutane to treat my acne, which after pretty much disappearing in college has now decided to flare up again which really sucks and has delivered a good, strong stomach punch to my self-confidence. since you have to be on accutane for like five months and have monthly blood samples taken and blah blah i wouldn't be able to begin until i am settled in my new city where i will be attending med school. i have never been on accutane and am a little worried about having to adjust to accutane, medschool, and a new environment all on my shaken confidence

3)i was also planning on getting lasik this summer before med school but my derm says that accutane would/could complicate the surgery(healing process) and to not get lasik within at least three months of being on the drug

4)my parents are getting divorced (dad left mom so completely one-sided) and my mom has been really depressed and ive had to be her support which has, in turn, taken its toll on my own mood. ive never been really depressed in my life but this has definitely proven to be dificult to deal with

5)worries about ridiculus amount of debt i will be taking on (50K+/year) and all the other generic stresses of medical school (these feelings will undoubtedly not change over the course of another year but they are confounding factors right now).

part of me is really excited about med school and the future and really wants to go ahead and get started, but another part of me thinks that another year of research and getting myself together may be in order...anyone have any thoughts, suggestions, similar experiences, advice, insights whatever...

thanks and sorry for the lengthy post,

RD

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[QuantumMechanic]

from your post it really sounds like that deferring may be a good option for you, especially since you have the "i want to finish my research project" excuse. there's no harm in holding off for a year with an acceptance in hand!

 

[Callogician]

Are there any cons to deferment which you neglected to mention?

If there is one thing that I can tell you about medical school, it's that age means absolutely nothing and that one year is a minor delay in the grand scheme of things.

 

[Mutt]

Defer.

There would be no question about it if I were in your position.

Pros:
Potential for productive research.
Have time to adjust to the potential changes in your physical presentation.
Help get Mom back on her feet.

Cons:

You'll be set back one year - will you know the difference between 46 and 45 years of age?


What else could deferment be but for circumstances like yours?

 

[realitydenied]

thanks for replies so far.

cons:
ready to get back into school and get started. i felt like i had made up my mind and, until today, had begun preparations for heading to med school next year. the research project has the possibility of being really great, but also may yield the same frustrating results experienced thus far...frustrations that i do not want to deal with for another year.
minor con: i moved to this city last summer and pretty much every good friend i have made over the course of the year has or will have moved by the end of this summer which kind of sucks

 

[Avalanche21]

How do you go about deferring? It's case by case, right? Someone has to approve your excuse? Thanks

 

[realitydenied]

Defer.

There would be no question about it if I were in your position.

Pros:
Potential for productive research.
Have time to adjust to the potential changes in your physical presentation.
Help get Mom back on her feet.

Cons:

You'll be set back one year - will you know the difference between 46 and 45 years of age?


What else could deferment be but for circumstances like yours?

its actually been about a year and a half since my parents first got seperated...the first 6 months i was living in the same city as my mom, but for the past year i have been in a different state. im not sure what i can do to help her get back on her feet that i havent already tried or will be able to do while not living in the same town. so that is not really a pro, but the other thoughts are helpful. thank you.

 

[kyidmnmaiv]

2)i went to the dermatologist today and he wants me to try accutane to treat my acne, which after pretty much disappearing in college has now decided to flare up again which really sucks and has delivered a good, strong stomach punch to my self-confidence. since you have to be on accutane for like five months and have monthly blood samples taken and blah blah i wouldn't be able to begin until i am settled in my new city where i will be attending med school. i have never been on accutane and am a little worried about having to adjust to accutane, medschool, and a new environment all on my shaken confidence

I've been on accutane for two weeks, which is awesome because there is now a light at the end of the tunnel after years of bad skin. What sucks about accutane (for me) is that it leaves me totally drained. I have no energy and I still have a week and a half of school left. I'm an undergrad taking 19 hours; I couldn't imagine being on this drug in med school with 20+ hours. Yes, the blood tests are annoying, but they really don't take much time. If you're considering being on accutane while in med school, you need to seriously consider the toll it will take on your body.

I don't want to freak you out or anything, just something to be aware of. GL.

 

[dr.z]

Take a break and defer. One year isn't going to make a huge difference in a long run.

 

[MDMAMA]

I would think about calling the school and talking with an advisor. I know that the first year is stressful, but when it's over, you are well on your way to your degree. Talking with the school will help you understand what their policies and procedures are and what advantages or disadvantages they see. They are likely to help you become acquainted with support and medical services available to students. I would defer if I were having doubts about whether or not medicine is what I wanted to do. However, there will always be physical and emotional reasons to postpone med school.

 

[zek]

How do you go about deferring? It's case by case, right? Someone has to approve your excuse? Thanks

I believe it varies from school to school. As far as I know some are kind of strict about deferrals and some will just pretty much automatically grant them.

 

[realitydenied]

i appreciate everyones input so far. i am going to sleep on it and see how i feel tomorrow.

 

[realitydenied]

didn't get much sleep last night, but pretty sure im going to defer

 

[mshheaddoc]

I believe it varies from school to school. As far as I know some are kind of strict about deferrals and some will just pretty much automatically grant them.

If you are even thinking about defering call now. I have seen a few people on here whose deferment requests were denied. Some require paperwork which is submitted to a committee, others you just write a letter and you're done with it.

While I sympathize with your plight, I also think that if your school is strict with deferment you won't have a chance. There is nothing that would "warrant" a deferment unless your mother had a serious mental condition. The worries you have are justified but they are what others have "been there and done that".

I don't mean to be rude or "mean" but I'm just taking the otherside to play devil's advocate. So please contact your school ASAP because we don't want you stuck in a situation you obviously won't be happy in.

 

[ND2005]

Isn't it kind of late to submit a deferral request?

Just to throw in a random anecdote, Accutane wasn't a big deal for me. I didn't notice any changes in energy level or any significant health issues. I was like 15 at the time though (had an aggressive dermatologist who was one of the first to push accutane). I just had to get the blood drawn a few times to make sure my liver didn't shut down -- that only takes like 20 or 30 minutes (and would actually probably take less in med school, since you'd have easy hospital/clinic access).

 

[WannaDoc]

If you could get approved to defer, I think I would do that.

If the same thing happened to me mom, I would be worrying about her quite a bit and you don't want that worry to affect your grades. Also, my sister and brother both went through the accutane experience. My brother didn't have too bad a time, but my sister was a different story. She now has BEAUTIFUL skin, but it doesn't always clear up in 5-6 months. I know she did two 5 month spans. The depression/fatigue the other poster was talking about definately can affect you. My sister had always been the most bubbly, fun, hardworking person, but on accutane she wasn't interesting in her friends, had a hard time staying awake after classes to get work done, and could cry very easily. After stopping, she was back to the person she was before, but it is a hard road for some.

I also have a friend that deferred to work on research. She loved it and wouldn't change that she took the year off. Earned some money and did things she didn't think she'd have time to do during med school.

These are my thoughts... you just don't want anything to interfer with how well you'd perform once in medical school.

 

[WannaDoc]

Sorry one more thing. Her skin/lips would also become so dry from the accutane, that no amount of chap skin or lotion solved it for her. During school, she would actually put chap stick on her face to try and cover the peeling skin... so if self-esteem/confidence could get you down, that may be something else.

Don't want to scare you, but I think it's important to consider what COULD happen while on accutane, the side effects can greatly affect your life.

And again... there is an up side... she now has beautiful skin... wish mine was as nice

 

[78222]

I deferred and it was a really great idea.