Tuition Question

[dentaldamnnn]

Hi,

I recently expressed my concerns to my family about student debt and how I was preparing myself to give up my dream schools (when/if I do get in) for ones that will be less of a financial burden for me later in life. My family reached out to me (sister & dad who are both doctors) and they said they’d be willing to split and pay my whole tuition price as an investment in my career and that I should be free to choose whatever school I wanted and not hold myself back because of price. They said all they want in return is for me to put their investment to good use and make something of myself.

Should I accept this? Or is this too much? I know it’s a blessing but I hate handouts and I feel like it’ll be something that’s being held over my head and brought up over and over again in arguments like “I paid x y z for you!!”. What if I fail out? Is the debt as bad as people say it is or is it manageable? Or should I accept it knowing it might make me feel guilty?

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[voxveritatisetlucis]

Accept it but pay it back without interest (especially your sister’s) once you are a dentist. Maybe they will refuse to take it but I would at least offer.

 

[nefavec]

Accept it and commit with them and especially with yourself that you’ll put their investment to good use. Showing them your efforts to succeed will be the best way to repay them.

Don’t fail out now by doubting the possibilities of your future accomplishments.

Count this as a major privilege that most dental students don’t receive, and make it count! And then whatever happens, take ownership of your choices. Just my 2¢.

 

[PerioDont]

Accept it but still don’t go to a crazy expensive school.

Pass the gift forward in your future to someone else

 

[bracketbuster68]

What makes some schools your dream? Name? Location? Opportunities? Something else?

 

[pubhealthdent]

Accept it but consider paying back all or a reasonable portion in the future

 

[Mr.Smile12]

That's kind, but you need to be upfront on how much it costs. Dental school is WAY pricier than medical school.

I'd take every effort to find scholarships (HPSP and NHSC for starters) so you could attend your dream school and not even worry about financial contributions, which may need to be taken into account in any financial aid package BTW.

 

[dentaldamnnn]

Accept it but pay it back without interest (especially your sister’s) once you are a dentist. Maybe they will refuse to take it but I would at least offer.

Accept it and commit with them and especially with yourself that you’ll put their investment to good use. Showing them your efforts to succeed will be the best way to repay them.

Don’t fail out now by doubting the possibilities of your future accomplishments.

Count this as a major privilege that most dental students don’t receive, and make it count! And then whatever happens, take ownership of your choices. Just my 2¢.

That's kind, but you need to be upfront on how much it costs. Dental school is WAY pricier than medical school.

I'd take every effort to find scholarships (HPSP and NHSC for starters) so you could attend your dream school and not even worry about financial contributions, which may need to be taken into account in any financial aid package BTW.

Accept it but consider paying back all or a reasonable portion in the future

What makes some schools your dream? Name? Location? Opportunities? Something else?

Accept it but still don’t go to a crazy expensive school.

Pass the gift forward in your future to someone else

Thank you everyone!!

 

[dentaldamnnn]

That's kind, but you need to be upfront on how much it costs. Dental school is WAY pricier than medical school.

I'd take every effort to find scholarships (HPSP and NHSC for starters) so you could attend your dream school and not even worry about financial contributions, which may need to be taken into account in any financial aid package BTW.

Hey Mr. Smile do you mind looking at my most recent post, I trust your opinions so much!

 

[2TH MVR]

What makes some schools your dream? Name? Location? Opportunities? Something else?

Exactly.

Why a dream school? Everyone graduates with a DDS/DMD and equal opportunity in the real world.
Do yourself and your generous family a favor and attend a cheaper dental school (if this is an option). Unless your family is filthy rich ..... just being "doctors" doesn't make them rich. Giving you this money will involve some financial stress for your family.

 

[dentaldamnnn]

Exactly.

Why a dream school? Everyone graduates with a DDS/DMD and equal opportunity in the real world.
Do yourself and your generous family a favor and attend a cheaper dental school (if this is an option). Unless your family is filthy rich ..... just being "doctors" doesn't make them rich. Giving you this money will involve some financial stress for your family.

a dream school to me is somewhere where i can be close to family, i suffer from mental illness so being within an hour away from somebody that can take care of me and i can potentially live with will improve my chances of success and stability while i try to keep myself on track, i have family in nyc and la, (most expensive schools). i wouldn't use the word filthy rich, we're by no means Kardashian level but my two sisters and dad are robotic neurosurgeons, my parents have paid for my siblings medical education fully so its not an issue for them, i'm mainly asking this question based on my own guilt since i've made it a point my whole life to pay for my entire lifestyle/car etc myself.

my parents are notorious for holding things over my head and making it seem like i wouldn't be anywhere without. them...

my question was mainly "can i handle the debt myself or should i suck it up and take the free ride"

but yeah

 

[voxveritatisetlucis]

MGMA reports that their salary survey revealed neurological surgery as the highest-paid position in the medical industry. They earn $875,626 per year. Not even orthopedic surgeons make more than neurosurgeons

For people who need further context. Even 75,000 (assuming they split the cost) is pretty much a drop in the bucket in this case. I would feel worse about it if they are pcp. I wouldn’t feel too bad and just take but maybe still ask to pay it back later (they will probably say no)

 

[charlestweed]

...... dad are robotic neurosurgeons, my parents have paid for my siblings medical education fully so its not an issue for them....

How do you know it’s not an issue for your parents? Did they tell you? They may not tell you because they love you.

I don’t know how much your parents make. With my current income, which is easily more than 2x as much as the national average for an orthodontist, I will have to work full time for at least 3-4 additional years in order for me come up with $800-900k in cash. That means that I will have to delay my retirement at least 3-4 years. That’s what I plan to do for my 17 yo son, who will attend college this fall, in case he gets accepted to an expensive dental school and an expensive dental specialty program afterward. Right now, he’s a premed and dentistry is his backup plan.

I think your parents will be very proud of you, if you tell them that you plan to take out some loans and you only accept a small portion of their financial help (ie rent and food money). If you love your parents and want them to retire early, pick a cheapest school. Find several students to share an apartment with to save money. Facing life challenges help teach you a lot of things in life. You will become a more responsible person and a harder worker.

 

[voxveritatisetlucis]

How do you know it’s not an issue for your parents? Did they tell you? They may not tell you because they love you.

I don’t know how much your parents make. With my current income, which is easily more than 2x as much as the national average for an orthodontist, I will have to work full time for at least 3-4 additional years in order to for me come up with $800-900k in cash. That’s mean that I will have to delay my retirement at least 3-4 years. That’s what I plan to do for my 17 yo son, who will attend college this fall, in case he gets accepted to an expensive dental school and an expensive dental specialty program afterward. Right now, he’s a premed and dentistry is his backup plan.

I think your parents will be very proud of you, if you tell them that you plan to take out some loans and you only accept a small portion of their financial help (ie rent and food money). If you love your parents and want them to retire early, pick a cheapest school. Find several students to share an apartment with to save money. Facing life challenges help teach you a lot of things in life. You will become more responsible person and harder worker.

True but neurosurgeons literally make that in one year. That is including academics who are paid lower. Median for private practice nsgy is probably like 1.2 million or something. That’s like an average joe buying an 8 yo used vehicle.

 

[charlestweed]

True but neurosurgeons literally make that in one year. That is including academics who are paid lower. Median for private practice nsgy is probably like 1.2 million or something. That’s like an average joe buying an 8 yo used vehicle.

Not all the income will go into the saving account. You have to pay taxes. You have to put money aside for retirement (401k, real estate investments etc)....so you can maintain the same lifestyle when you stop working. You have to pay for home mortgages + HOA + other maintenance fees. And people with high income tend to have bigger homes, nicer cars and bigger loans.....and their kids attend expensive private middle schools and HS.

Currently, I don't have any debt. After the 401k, paying taxes, living expenses, helping my parents etc, less than 1/2 of my gross income go toward the saving account.

 

[somefuturedoc]

a dream school to me is somewhere where i can be close to family, i suffer from mental illness so being within an hour away from somebody that can take care of me and i can potentially live with will improve my chances of success and stability while i try to keep myself on track, i have family in nyc and la, (most expensive schools). i wouldn't use the word filthy rich, we're by no means Kardashian level but my two sisters and dad are robotic neurosurgeons, my parents have paid for my siblings medical education fully so its not an issue for them, i'm mainly asking this question based on my own guilt since i've made it a point my whole life to pay for my entire lifestyle/car etc myself.

my parents are notorious for holding things over my head and making it seem like i wouldn't be anywhere without. them...

my question was mainly "can i handle the debt myself or should i suck it up and take the free ride"

but yeah

If they’re offering, I would do it. Especially if they already paid for your siblings. If you feel guilty then make an agreement about how you’ll pay them back.

 

[2TH MVR]

a dream school to me is somewhere where i can be close to family, i suffer from mental illness so being within an hour away from somebody that can take care of me and i can potentially live with will improve my chances of success and stability while i try to keep myself on track, i have family in nyc and la, (most expensive schools). i wouldn't use the word filthy rich, we're by no means Kardashian level but my two sisters and dad are robotic neurosurgeons, my parents have paid for my siblings medical education fully so its not an issue for them, i'm mainly asking this question based on my own guilt since i've made it a point my whole life to pay for my entire lifestyle/car etc myself.

my parents are notorious for holding things over my head and making it seem like i wouldn't be anywhere without. them...

my question was mainly "can i handle the debt myself or should i suck it up and take the free ride"

but yeah

I understand now. I would take the generous offer from your family. Take advantage of living close to your family for emotional support.

Good luck with your future.