Venting

[sprinkle0420]

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I just needed to let things out really quick about how I am feeling. I found out in August that I was pregnant, and although I was shcoked as it was unplanned, I fully embraced it. My boyfriend and I were so excited at the prospect of becoming parents, and then last thursday I had my big ultrasound at 18 weeks. Thats when things began to turn for the worst. After what seemed like an ultrasound that took forever, the doctor analyzed the pictures and said that I was pregnant with twins. He then said that he would schedule an appointment the next day with a specialist....I began to sense something was wrong. With the excitement over having twins, I didn't stop to think during the appointment that they never let me look at the ultrasound pictures at all, that I never even got to have one glance at the screen. That next day when I went to see the specialist, is when the bomb was dropped on me. I was told that my twins had an extremely rare birth defect....one that happens 1/48,000 cases of pregnancies. I was in total and utter shock. As he performed the ultrasound and showed me what was wrong with the babies, the tears streamed down my face uncontrollably. It was clear that these babies would never, ever have a normal life if born....if they even survived to birth. I just needed to get this off my chest...maybe it will make me stronger in the end, maybe more dedicated into trying to get into pharmacy school. I don't know, right now I feel so weak and depressed...I just hope it will pass. To those stressing about schools and grades, be thankful for your health and the health of the loved ones around you.

 

[Ghady]

I feel bad that one of us has to go through such a hard time and my heart goes out to you and ur bf. Take some time to think, remember I didnt say, take some time to be depressed. Take it as a task, as a challenge and get back to the oval office of ur head and figure out a plan. Be strong!!! Nobody has been able to solve any problem by crying. Ask questions, see what your options are, dont let family members or anybody tell u what to do, cos nobody is really wearing that shoe but you. AND YES YOU CAN MAKE IT THROUGH THIS RAIN!!!!! Pray that Providence assists u in making the best decision.

 

[alenadoma]

I just needed to let things out really quick about how I am feeling. I found out in August that I was pregnant, and although I was shcoked as it was unplanned, I fully embraced it. My boyfriend and I were so excited at the prospect of becoming parents, and then last thursday I had my big ultrasound at 18 weeks. Thats when things began to turn for the worst. After what seemed like an ultrasound that took forever, the doctor analyzed the pictures and said that I was pregnant with twins. He then said that he would schedule an appointment the next day with a specialist....I began to sense something was wrong. With the excitement over having twins, I didn't stop to think during the appointment that they never let me look at the ultrasound pictures at all, that I never even got to have one glance at the screen. That next day when I went to see the specialist, is when the bomb was dropped on me. I was told that my twins had an extremely rare birth defect....one that happens 1/48,000 cases of pregnancies. I was in total and utter shock. As he performed the ultrasound and showed me what was wrong with the babies, the tears streamed down my face uncontrollably. It was clear that these babies would never, ever have a normal life if born....if they even survived to birth. I just needed to get this off my chest...maybe it will make me stronger in the end, maybe more dedicated into trying to get into pharmacy school. I don't know, right now I feel so weak and depressed...I just hope it will pass. To those stressing about schools and grades, be thankful for your health and the health of the loved ones around you.

Oh goodness, that sounds horrible. I'm so sorry you have to go through that. Do your best to stay strong, as difficult as it may be and never underestimate the power of belief. I really think if you believe that things will turn out well, they will eventually.
Be strong!!

 

[confettiflyer]

Oh wow, I hope everything turns out for the best for you.

To turn this into a teachable moment, I have some questions that you don't have to answer at all.

1) What exactly did your physician see that caused him/her to contact a specialist? I wonder how much he knew or didn't know, and whether it was the right thing to clue you in on his thoughts or simply defer to the specialist.

2) What exactly is the birth defect?

Anyway, be strong and we all wish you the best. Remember, you don't have to answer the above questions at all, just check in and let us know how you're doing or if you need any assistance.

 

[sprinkle0420]

I really didn't want to say what the defect, but I will go ahead and say due to the anonymity of this site. Basically, they found that the twins are conjoined where their genitals would be. They do have separate legs and at this point, the specialist was able to determine that they share a single bladder. He could not even tell me the feasibility of separation at this point...he said that determining this may not even be possible until the babies were born and they can perform an MRI. Separation comes down to whether they share an intestinal tract...if this is the case, there is no hope for separation. If they can be separated, they will not have any genitalia since this is where the point of attachement is. He also found that one of the twins has a heart defect and fluid build-up in the lungs so this baby might not even survive to birth. I am really at odds with what to do in the situation, the odds of survival are not good, there is a good chance they could be born stillborn, and there is no promise of them being able to be separated. It was so surreal to learn that I have conjoined twins becuase it is so extremely rare. The doctor told me that 90% of individuals who find out they are having conjoined twins choose to terminate pregnancy due to the health risks involved and quality of life of babies once they are born. I have a difficult decision ahead of me.

 

[bluesickle]

I know what would be right for me but that may not necessarily be what is right for you. All I can say is, life is tough enough as a fully functional human being but I can't imagine a life as a conjoined twin. I don't think I would have the heart to stack the deck on my child before he or she is even born.

BTW, I was a fraternal twin and my parents went through absolute hell raising us.

 

[confettiflyer]

(you got PM sprinkle)

I don't think anyone here will be able to come up with an answer as to what to do, just pray that it will come to you over the next few days. I think this situation is so unique that any advice culled here won't resonate.

 

[UNMorBUST]

I hope everything turns out ok. You have my prayers.

 

[Transformer]

(you got PM sprinkle)

I don't think anyone here will be able to come up with an answer as to what to do, just pray that it will come to you over the next few days. I think this situation is so unique that any advice culled here won't resonate.

I cannot imagine what you are currently going through. I will never know. As confettiflyer stated, I don't think anyone can give you a right or wrong answer since this personal decision is ethically related. I also pray an answer comes to you in the near future.

I wish you the best

you are in my prayers.

 

[Chase Pharm]

My heart goes out to you and your family...Just pray to God for guidance and he will help you. Please keep us posted and let us know how you are doing. Things will work out for you.

God bless you

 

[PurpleMD]

I could only imagine what you are going through. But as others have said, don't give up!!! Sometimes when God gives a situation that we can not handle that is the time to seek him. My prayer will be with you and your family as you are going through this time.

 

[PharmD321]

I just needed to let things out really quick about how I am feeling. I found out in August that I was pregnant, and although I was shcoked as it was unplanned, I fully embraced it. My boyfriend and I were so excited at the prospect of becoming parents, and then last thursday I had my big ultrasound at 18 weeks. Thats when things began to turn for the worst. After what seemed like an ultrasound that took forever, the doctor analyzed the pictures and said that I was pregnant with twins. He then said that he would schedule an appointment the next day with a specialist....I began to sense something was wrong. With the excitement over having twins, I didn't stop to think during the appointment that they never let me look at the ultrasound pictures at all, that I never even got to have one glance at the screen. That next day when I went to see the specialist, is when the bomb was dropped on me. I was told that my twins had an extremely rare birth defect....one that happens 1/48,000 cases of pregnancies. I was in total and utter shock. As he performed the ultrasound and showed me what was wrong with the babies, the tears streamed down my face uncontrollably. It was clear that these babies would never, ever have a normal life if born....if they even survived to birth. I just needed to get this off my chest...maybe it will make me stronger in the end, maybe more dedicated into trying to get into pharmacy school. I don't know, right now I feel so weak and depressed...I just hope it will pass. To those stressing about schools and grades, be thankful for your health and the health of the loved ones around you.

My church and I prayed for you and everyone else in the same situation!

Depression is an obstacle that only you can pass. Pray and you will be fine!!

 

[Storm90]

I just needed to let things out really quick about how I am feeling. I found out in August that I was pregnant, and although I was shcoked as it was unplanned, I fully embraced it. My boyfriend and I were so excited at the prospect of becoming parents, and then last thursday I had my big ultrasound at 18 weeks. Thats when things began to turn for the worst. After what seemed like an ultrasound that took forever, the doctor analyzed the pictures and said that I was pregnant with twins. He then said that he would schedule an appointment the next day with a specialist....I began to sense something was wrong. With the excitement over having twins, I didn't stop to think during the appointment that they never let me look at the ultrasound pictures at all, that I never even got to have one glance at the screen. That next day when I went to see the specialist, is when the bomb was dropped on me. I was told that my twins had an extremely rare birth defect....one that happens 1/48,000 cases of pregnancies. I was in total and utter shock. As he performed the ultrasound and showed me what was wrong with the babies, the tears streamed down my face uncontrollably. It was clear that these babies would never, ever have a normal life if born....if they even survived to birth. I just needed to get this off my chest...maybe it will make me stronger in the end, maybe more dedicated into trying to get into pharmacy school. I don't know, right now I feel so weak and depressed...I just hope it will pass. To those stressing about schools and grades, be thankful for your health and the health of the loved ones around you.

You have a very difficult decision ahead of you and I can only offer my prayers to help you through it. No one can tell you what to do, and I'm sorry you have to go through this. May you find strength in this trying time. :'(

 

[monsterbrain]

I really didn't want to say what the defect, but I will go ahead and say due to the anonymity of this site. Basically, they found that the twins are conjoined where their genitals would be. They do have separate legs and at this point, the specialist was able to determine that they share a single bladder. He could not even tell me the feasibility of separation at this point...he said that determining this may not even be possible until the babies were born and they can perform an MRI. Separation comes down to whether they share an intestinal tract...if this is the case, there is no hope for separation. If they can be separated, they will not have any genitalia since this is where the point of attachement is. He also found that one of the twins has a heart defect and fluid build-up in the lungs so this baby might not even survive to birth. I am really at odds with what to do in the situation, the odds of survival are not good, there is a good chance they could be born stillborn, and there is no promise of them being able to be separated. It was so surreal to learn that I have conjoined twins becuase it is so extremely rare. The doctor told me that 90% of individuals who find out they are having conjoined twins choose to terminate pregnancy due to the health risks involved and quality of life of babies once they are born. I have a difficult decision ahead of me.

This is just an impossible situation that only you can really feel and understand (because those babies are inside of you). I found out when I was eight months pregnant that my baby had a rare birth defect. The doctors told me there was no hope; either she would die before being born, right after, or be a vegetable. I remember everyone saying "Everything will be alright," almost like they didn't want me to feel sad. Well, sprinkle, you just go ahead and be as sad as you need to be. When making your decision, just keep in mind that sometimes doctors give you the worst case scenario. My daughter has had many surgeries, sees multiple specialists, and has had lots of therapies, but she is not even slightly ******ed. But that's not meant to take away from what you are going through (sometimes things don't turn out for the best). However, your doctors truly may not know what they are dealing with until those babies are born. Please PM me if you think talking to me will help. Big hugs to you!

 

[UES Girl]

Sprinkle, I just wanted to say, my heart goes out to you and I will keep you in my prayers. You have a very hard decision to make and I wish you the strength you need in such difficult time !

 

[atticus27]

My sincere and deepest sympathies to you and your family.