Walking Away....I'm Done.

Discover Your Odds of Getting into Medical School
This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Thank you.
E

envirocopy512

Full Member
10+ Year Member
Joined
Apr 21, 2011
Messages
39
Reaction score
0
Members do not see this ad.
I've become so hooked on the game of getting into school that I've never really sat down and considered other options. Lately though I've been thinking about walking away from this entire endeavor. After volunteering at a rehab hospital for 6 months, where I've gotten to shadow doctors and PTs regularly, I've reached the conclusion that I can't deal with patients. They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.

The gross stuff also bother me. I know, real mature, right? I can't deny it though, I would not want to deal with it all the time. The other day some lady shat herself while she was using her walker. I felt bad for her, but on some dark level, it also annoyed me a great deal. Maybe not her, but the situation.

I guess overall I'm seeing a side of humanity that I'm not sure I'm the best-equipped person to deal with. That's just me being honest. I find it all really depressing and uncomfortable to be around.

The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
 
good for you man. Seriously. I think sometimes it is more important to know what you do not want.
 
.
 
Last edited:
Man I don't know if I would particularly enjoy working in a rehab hospital either. I think maybe you should shadow some different specialties - ones outside that hospital.

Try to shadow some surgical specialties... watch and orthopod fix joints all day ... spend a day watching cardiologists correct heart rhythms in the cath lab ... radiology, pathology, psychiatry, family med, etc. There is such a wide variety within the field of medicine that I think you're doing yourself a disservice by giving up on your ambitions without having thoroughly explored all of the options.
 
envirocopy512 said:
The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
Click to expand...

I'm sure there are people who'll tell you to tough it out, but honestly, if you don't like medicine now, it's better to get out before, you know, you start learning how to practice medicine. There's no use trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.

Congratulations on skipping out on a couple hundred thousand dollars of debt, too. 👍
 
Good for you man.

inb4 some unfunny douche makes a joke about less competition now
 
It takes courage to be brutally honest with yourself. Bravo!
 
That's great you're realizing this now. I'm sure there are many medical students who now feel the same way you do after getting knee-deep into their rotations... and they of course have no way out (well, except for radiology/pathology I guess).

I've also realized there are some settings that wouldn't jive with me as a doctor. I used to think I wanted to go into EM, but after a year of volunteering in an ED... I just wouldn't be able to put up with many of the patients and the chaotic setting. However, there are other medical environments that fit me perfectly, like the ICU and the OR which are more controlled.

Best of luck to you
 
envirocopy512 said:
I've become so hooked on the game of getting into school that I've never really sat down and considered other options. Lately though I've been thinking about walking away from this entire endeavor. After volunteering at a rehab hospital for 6 months, where I've gotten to shadow doctors and PTs regularly, I've reached the conclusion that I can't deal with patients. They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.

The gross stuff also bother me. I know, real mature, right? I can't deny it though, I would not want to deal with it all the time. The other day some lady shat herself while she was using her walker. I felt bad for her, but on some dark level, it also annoyed me a great deal. Maybe not her, but the situation.

I guess overall I'm seeing a side of humanity that I'm not sure I'm the best-equipped person to deal with. That's just me being honest. I find it all really depressing and uncomfortable to be around.

The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
Click to expand...

You might want to shadow or volunteer somewhere other than a rehab hospital, just to be sure. Also, consider talking to a few docs about your concerns to see if they have any advice before you move on.
 
envirocopy512 said:
They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.
Click to expand...

Bingo!

Self-knowledge is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, gift we can have.
 
Most people figure this out when its too late to go back. Congratulations, you just gained a decade of your life back.
 
WDeagle said:
Most people figure this out when its too late to go back. Congratulations, you just gained a decade of your life back.
Click to expand...

True dat. If you can not do it, don't do it. I generally tell my friends to go to med school only if they can't see themselves doing anything else.
 
Zoom-Zoom said:
True dat. If you can not do it, don't do it. I generally tell my friends to go to med school only if they can't see themselves doing anything else.
Click to expand...

That's a weird thing that's brought out all the time, and it's complete horse****. 99% of doctors could have done something else. It's ok to have multiple passions and choose one.

On the other hand, in this case, considering he simply dislikes working with patients, medicine is probably not for him, so it makes sense.
 
Well that is the point of clinical work, shadowing and everything else the admissions process puts you through. To help people decide if medicine is for them before it is too late. I hope you find a career field you truely enjoy!
 
Good luck, hopefully you find something meaningful. The rest of us will carry on without you.
 
senorsquishie said:
Well that is the point of clinical work, shadowing and everything else the admissions process puts you through. To help people decide if medicine is for them before it is too late. I hope you find a career field you truely enjoy!
Click to expand...

Yea, that's part of the reason why it's considered a 'requirement' by admission committees. Many people tend to use it as kind of a thing you have to do and just 'check it off', and probably for many it's just that but if you absolutely hate patients, it's going to be a very very long training period for you and you've automatically narrowed your choices down to VERY few specialties. So the process worked in this case -- the OP decided that medicine wasn't for him and saved himself some problems down the road.
 
envirocopy512 said:
I've become so hooked on the game of getting into school that I've never really sat down and considered other options. Lately though I've been thinking about walking away from this entire endeavor. After volunteering at a rehab hospital for 6 months, where I've gotten to shadow doctors and PTs regularly, I've reached the conclusion that I can't deal with patients. They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.

The gross stuff also bother me. I know, real mature, right? I can't deny it though, I would not want to deal with it all the time. The other day some lady shat herself while she was using her walker. I felt bad for her, but on some dark level, it also annoyed me a great deal. Maybe not her, but the situation.

I guess overall I'm seeing a side of humanity that I'm not sure I'm the best-equipped person to deal with. That's just me being honest. I find it all really depressing and uncomfortable to be around.

The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
Click to expand...

damn funny thing bro, i just decided too today that i no longer want to become a physician. wut are the freakin chances lol.

i think the real good thing about quitting pre-med is that even it was a bad decision we can always resume it later. this is a big world, alot of things to do.
 
There have certainly been days when I've wondered, "Am I really doing the right thing?" Some patients are hard to deal with. $280,000 in loans (not even taking interest into account) is pretty hard to swallow. 7+ years of training is a long time. You would have to be crazy not to have second thoughts.

But then I think about the patients I did like. Or the patients I didn't like at first, but softened once I did something as insignificant as bring them a blanket. People in the hospital feel terrible; I don't expect them to always be cheery. I think about a surgery I got to observe, and how as I watched the surgeons literally fix someone I was overcome by this feeling that I HAVE TO DO THIS, because there's just nothing else like it. Or the fact that at least I'll have job security, and that I'll be able to pay those loans back eventually. Then I think about whether I really want to do anything else, and I just keep feeling like anything else would bore me. Easier maybe, and certainly less gross, but it just wouldn't be right for me. I've worked a quiet office job and did nothing but count down the hours until I could leave, but even as a useless volunteer in the ER the hours flew by because I was absorbed and actually cared about what I was doing.

If you've never felt that way about medicine, then there's nothing wrong with that, and it's a good think you've realized it now.
 
That's the point of it all. You look for what you think you'll enjoy. Have you looked into optometry or pharmacy? Still in science, working with people, and you don't get much of the bull****.
 
I mean, I know they sing about the importance of poo in Scrubs, but not everything in medicine is riddled with bodily functions. Have you tried shadowing a less gross specialty? And you know, adult VA patients do not necessarily represent all patients in medicine. What about pediatrics? A know a big reason many people choose peds is because they can't stand adult patients.

I guess the biggest issue is that if you're already forcing yourself to see medicine through the lens of specialties, you're probably right in backing out now. I think for a premed, we need to be able to see the entire field as opportunity and figure out specifics later. So, oh well. Now you can move onto something that will probably fulfill you more, give you less grief, and actually provide you with a decent salary for your time! Good job and good luck!
 
Like everyone else said, good for you. You're clearly ahead of the curve in terms of realistic expectations.

Personally I'm kind of attracted to some of the stuff you mentioned. I think we are a bit to quick to say that life is great and wonderful. Life and humanity is at times pretty ****ty, and you can see it in medicine and war pretty clearly. Call me masochistic, but it gets me off, philosophically, to be there and associate with it, and maybe improve it, like it brings me closer to some kind of truth.

Best of luck to you. I hope you find a field that brings you happiness.
 
With every career you're going to have to deal with people, yes, even rude ones. I agree with whoever said to shadow other specialties. As for the lady shatting on herself, isn't that what the nurses are for? LOL
 
Well...while it's unfortunate that you didn't get to see how great medicine really is, it's good that you realized that this isn't the field for you.

Good luck! 👍
 
zaq said:
Definitely worth knowing now instead of year 3 of medical school.
Click to expand...

this.

i haven't read the thread past the quoted post, but this is the exact reason why schools want you to have significant clinical exposure to know what you're getting yourself into. i know of a student who only realized this after he started clinical rotations... meaning he was already half-way through his third year of school. his med school debt + ivy undergrad debt meant he had no choice but to go through with getting his degree. he was hoping to either go into psych or a non-traditional career using his MD.
:luck:
 
From what I've seen working as a medical assistant (1 yr) and my clinic work abroad, one of the main things that I've learned is that medicine is a tough field. There is a lot of bs to deal with, patients can be extremely difficult, and plenty of days can just be plain crappy. That being said, I can't think of a better job for me. Medicine isn't all smiles an rainbows... some days it's angry patients and defecation. If you are passionate about the job, however, I think that it becomes worthwhile.
 
shaggy alfresco said:
That's a weird thing that's brought out all the time, and it's complete horse****. 99% of doctors could have done something else. It's ok to have multiple passions and choose one.

On the other hand, in this case, considering he simply dislikes working with patients, medicine is probably not for him, so it makes sense.
Click to expand...

You're confusing the ability to do anything else with wanting to do anything else. The poster was saying that just because you can do something doesn't mean you should...true both for setting off nuclear weapons and going to medical school. Clearly someone who can succeed in medicine is capable of succeeding in many other fields, and if that person would be happier in a non-medical field then that's the career they should pick.
 
envirocopy512 said:
I've become so hooked on the game of getting into school that I've never really sat down and considered other options. Lately though I've been thinking about walking away from this entire endeavor. After volunteering at a rehab hospital for 6 months, where I've gotten to shadow doctors and PTs regularly, I've reached the conclusion that I can't deal with patients. They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.

The gross stuff also bother me. I know, real mature, right? I can't deny it though, I would not want to deal with it all the time. The other day some lady shat herself while she was using her walker. I felt bad for her, but on some dark level, it also annoyed me a great deal. Maybe not her, but the situation.

I guess overall I'm seeing a side of humanity that I'm not sure I'm the best-equipped person to deal with. That's just me being honest. I find it all really depressing and uncomfortable to be around.

The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
Click to expand...



You just saved yourself from a cartload of horse****.
 
ChineseFoodMD said:
With every career you're going to have to deal with people, yes, even rude ones. I agree with whoever said to shadow other specialties. As for the lady shatting on herself, isn't that what the nurses are for? LOL
Click to expand...

That's actually really true; patients are just people, and just as there are a lot of rude patients there are a lot of rude people. If you can't deal with them, you're going to make your life unnecessarily difficult.
 
envirocopy512 said:
I've become so hooked on the game of getting into school that I've never really sat down and considered other options. Lately though I've been thinking about walking away from this entire endeavor. After volunteering at a rehab hospital for 6 months, where I've gotten to shadow doctors and PTs regularly, I've reached the conclusion that I can't deal with patients. They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.

The gross stuff also bother me. I know, real mature, right? I can't deny it though, I would not want to deal with it all the time. The other day some lady shat herself while she was using her walker. I felt bad for her, but on some dark level, it also annoyed me a great deal. Maybe not her, but the situation.

I guess overall I'm seeing a side of humanity that I'm not sure I'm the best-equipped person to deal with. That's just me being honest. I find it all really depressing and uncomfortable to be around.

The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
Click to expand...

Your criticisms about medicine are fair. You have to be able to stomach gross stuff and deal with difficult situations. That is the field.

As for your criticism about the patients:
They're not all bad, but so many of them are rude, uncooperative, defensive, and/or completely indifferent about their health.
Click to expand...
Dealing with rude, uncooperative, defensive people who are indifferent... that falls under the category of people skills. EVERY job that pays well (100k+) and deals with people involves stomaching annoying people. That's not unique to medicine.

I'm glad I had the chance to work for a handful of years. My expectations for the field of medicine are very low. Decent pay. Interesting pathology and science. Really annoying uncooperative rude people. That's life. You can learn to be positive and grateful despite all these factors.
 
Last edited:
MCAT guy said:
I'm glad I had the chance to work for a handful of years. My expectations for the field of medicine are very low. Decent pay. Interesting pathology and science. Really annoying uncooperative rude people. That's life. You can learn to be positive and grateful despite all these factors.
Click to expand...


Same here! I was wondering whether or not I was the only one. I have no delusions that my patients are going to think I'm great or that I'm going to like most of them. I am not even banking on the money because things can always get worse.

This way, I can still do what I like and when I get that "thank you, doctor," I can be pleasantly surprised. It's just icing.

(I actually told one of my physicians thank you at the end of our visit and he was visibly surprised. I thought that was telling.)
 
Any ideas on what else you may want to do? Quiet office job, presumably?
 
envirocopy512 said:
I guess overall I'm seeing a side of humanity that I'm not sure I'm the best-equipped person to deal with. That's just me being honest. I find it all really depressing and uncomfortable to be around.

The most telling thing is that I'm always RELIEVED to go to work at my quiet office job after my time in the hospital.

I'm glad I figured this out sooner than later.
Click to expand...

There are a lot of other premeds who would benefit from the same epiphany, but will probably push through this crappy (no pun intended) journey hoping it's not as what you describe but then finding out it is EXACTLY as you assume.
 
ColumMcCann said:
There are a lot of other premeds who would benefit from the same epiphany, but will probably push through this crappy (no pun intended) journey hoping it's not as what you describe but then finding out it is EXACTLY as you assume.
Click to expand...

I don't think getting annoyed with an old lady pooping is a good reason to stop pursuing medicine. I don't think anyone likes poop. But if that was just his breaking point of sorts, then that's great that he was honest with himself, but like I said, that's not really a good representation of what you do on a daily basis as a physician.
 
I'll echo everyone else's congratulations and well wishes. Figuring out what you want to do with life is not always easy. However, it's worth noting that I share your distaste for dealing with patients. There are certainly ways to get around that including pursuing a specialty that doesn't involve much direct patient care and going private practice and just firing all the patients who suck. The gross stuff, though, is pretty much omnipresent.
 
And this is why clinical experience is so important!
I'm glad you were able to make this decision early own.
Good luck in the future. I hope you find whatever your true passion is.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

FuturePediatricNeurosurge
Interviews/Essays: Walking the line between savior complex and genuine desire to serve the underserved
Replies
12
Views
2K
FuturePediatricNeurosurge
FuturePediatricNeurosurge
B
Not Sure If I'm Rushing Things
Replies
0
Views
459
BeGladNonTrad
B
D
  • Locked
What if I'm just a normal dude?
Replies
37
Views
3K
GoSpursGo
GoSpursGo
premedbarista
should I disclose that I'm transgender on my app? nervous :(
Replies
15
Views
2K
LeaveNoTrace
L
H
  • Locked
Pandemic wiped away clinical opportunities
Replies
36
Views
3K
gyngyn
gyngyn
Top