What's the Most Clueless Question Someone's Asked In Class?

[Mad Jack]

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Not the most clueless thing ever, but the carrot thing reminded me of this.

Disclaimer: you can't un-know this, high 'ick' factor.

Just saw an incarcerated patient with a prolapsed stoma (i.e. colostomy), who also had parastomal herpes.
Student: that rash sure looked like herpes, didn't it?
Chief: That's because it is herpes.
Student: But I thought that was sexually transmitted!
Me: It is.
Student: That's weird. So how did the patient get it there?
Awkward silence.
Student: I don't get it.
Student #2: Dude, that IS how he got it!
Student #1: (takes a minute, horrified look on face) But that means...OMG, I had no idea people do that!
Chief: I've never seen it [parastomal herpes] outside of the prisoner population, but I'm sure it happens.
Colorectal Attending: Yep, I've seen a few married women with parastomal warts....(launches into conversation about various things he's seen associated with stomas, to students' horror).

That's getting shelved in my top 10 most horrifying things I've ever read. Better to know about it now than later, I guess...

 

[shaq93]

But you can break a penis, and it's a lot more common than you'd think. The break is actually known as a penile fracture, despite the penis lacking a bone, and your professor is actually wrong and made you look foolish for nothing. Knew this girl that did it to a guy on accident once, she thought her period had started early in the middle of sex. Guy started to realize things hurt, and sure enough, broken penis. She ended up with the unfortunate nickname of "Cockbreaker" for the rest of her life.

Edit: Should have read the rest of the thread before responding.

lol at cockbreaker

 

[FIREitUP]

Clever girl.... lol



We use the K-pen here. Like an Epi-pen, but with Kayexalate. We inject it into anyone that runs into the hospital screaming "I'm HYPERKALEMIC! HEEEEELP ME!"

But, tbt, I had my dumb moment involving Gilbert's. We get a question in path and the answer is hyperbilirubinemia blah blah and the professor explains saying "This is classic Gilbert in that french pronunciation. So, myself, never having heard it pronounced this way and not recognizing that it was Gilberts, raise my hand and ask "Okay, I understand this Gilbert Syndrome. How is that different from Gilbert?"
Professor thinks he's having a stroke. Class doesn't even know what the hell I'm asking. Actually, some thought I was being an dingus because he was pronouncing it that way. I was...being serious. He doesn't even respond. 15 seconds later - LIGHT BULB. I was embarrassed. I went to his office after and explained. Light bulb went off in his head and he chuckled. I've told this story so many times. Never gets old.

your fault for not listening to Goljan, you had it coming bro

 

[Kaustikos]

your fault for not listening to Goljan, you had it coming bro

Or, ya know, the fact that it's almost a 50/50 split on people who pronounce it either way.

Also, Goljan? Things I forgot for 500, Alex.

 

[Apoplexy__]

We use the K-pen here. Like an Epi-pen, but with Kayexalate. We inject it into anyone that runs into the hospital screaming "I'm HYPERKALEMIC! HEEEEELP ME!"

This made me laugh so hard...

 

[Cardinals]

About a month into anatomy someone asked what anterior meant

 

[deleted480308]

I'm so glad no one posted some of my screwups here

 

[FIREitUP]

Or, ya know, the fact that it's almost a 50/50 split on people who pronounce it either way.

Also, Goljan? Things I forgot for 500, Alex.

Goljan had a whole shpeal on how its pronounced (i.e., 50% of people pronounce it incorrectly).

 

[Kaustikos]

Goljan had a whole shpeal on how its pronounced (i.e., 50% of people pronounce it incorrectly).

I believe you. I'm just saying; Step 1 **** is right along with OB/GYN in terms of things I willfully remove from my brain after exams.

 

[wjs010]

How...wha...how?!
I feel slightly dumber having just read that question. Maybe it's cause I'm cramming for boards and this stuff is fresh in my head...but it seems like very basic knowledge. I expect a fresh nursing school graduate would know the difference too.

I'm honestly shocked.

Isn't that a beta blocker? Lol. How can one get those mixed up

 

[farnk20]

My school has a program for M1s to essentially shadow someone first week of school. Needless to say, it's a gold mine for interactions like these:

Friday afternoon on Medicine:
M1: "Any fun plans for the weekend? Bet you can't wait to be out of here!"
Resident: "...yeah, that's not how this works. You do know we work weekends too, right?"
M1: *look of abject horror*

 

[emraldragon]

My school has a program for M1s to essentially shadow someone first week of school. Needless to say, it's a gold mine for interactions like these:

Friday afternoon on Medicine:
M1: "Any fun plans for the weekend? Bet you can't wait to be out of here!"
Resident: "...yeah, that's not how this works. You do know we work weekends too, right?"
M1: *look of abject horror*

 

[Kaustikos]

My school has a program for M1s to essentially shadow someone first week of school. Needless to say, it's a gold mine for interactions like these:

Friday afternoon on Medicine:
M1: "Any fun plans for the weekend? Bet you can't wait to be out of here!"
Resident: "...yeah, that's not how this works. You do know we work weekends too, right?"
M1: *look of abject horror*

Is it bad that I prefer weekdays off because I can actually get **** done? Without having to worry if the bank closes early or they don't do weekend appointments?

 

[BlueLabel]

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