Why it sucks to have poor parents

[Psycho Doctor]

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I dont know what the point of being a parent is, but it certainly isnt so you have another opportunity to spend money. The point of having money is to spend it on yourself, not give it to somebody else.

it's also to spend it on those you love...not as an obligation but it should be someothing parwents or even children want to do for their families.

and i don't believe parents owe their kids an education...just the tools to get one.

 

[LizzyM]

Going back to the OP -

You need to get over your fear of debt. There is good debt (morgage, educational loans) and bad debt (credit card spending for entertainment, vacations, non-essential consumer goods).

You mention being in this country for a few years. Perhaps you came from an economy where borrowing was not customary and where one pays cash for all transactions.

You are going to have to borrow in order to pay tuition and living expenses while in medical school. This is expected. Few people have the means to support themselves with their own $ while in medical school (the only ones I know who have done that were former professional athletes).

Medical students have high lifetime earning potential because, once finished with residency, most doctors make very good salaries. You may also have an opportunity to get loan forgiveness in exchange for working in underserved areas (either urban or rural).

Don't be afraid of good debt. It got many of us where we are today and it is a way to build wealth in America.

 

[PineappleGirl]

If any of you are in a position where you legitimately do not talk or have contact with a parent, I would suggest you pass that information on to your financial aid office. Some med schools do not allow it. As such, I had my father this time write a letter, and get it notarized, as to his financial status and why he doesn't file taxes. If you are really in a bind, the college will see it. If you're not, the college will see through anything you try to tell them. Atleast in my case, this worked.

👍 👍
This is good advice. I did something similar for undergrad, writing letters to the financial aid office and informing them that I had virtually no contact with my father, that my father refused to sumbit financial information and would make no contribution to my education. I never thought of getting the letter notarized. That's a nice touch. In my case, some schools were understanding about this. Other schools it was just like, no, our policy is we have to see both parents, we don't care what the circumstances are, you get no money. It totally depends on the school.

 

[drwlo]

Like someone said on this thread if you're over 21 you are considered independent and your parents income no longer matters to the financial aid application process. Also some schools have grants/scholarship for those who agree to practice in-state or in underpriviliged areas.

Most of the schools I applied to count your parents income regardless of your age. There was a man at one of my interviews in his 40s and they still wanted his parents info.

 

[UTKB]

Karina, you will appreciate your medical degree so much more if you pay for it yourself. Knowing you have all that debt will keep you from dropping out if times get tough, and will keep you motivated to get a good job out of school. Self-sufficiency is a good trait to teach your kids too. My parents wanted to help me through undergrad,but even though they had the money (according to financial aid office), they couldn't because they were obligated to paying back past debts. I didn't even want them to buy me any pants because I knew they couldn't really afford it, they'd just charge it. I was on my own, paid for college with loans, worked, and I have $40K debt. But I sure worked hard when I was there, didn't waste time. I am so proud of myself, and honored to be admitted to medskool. I will be even more proud paying and working for it on my own. I'm sure I won't appreciate it as deeply if I don't pay and really feel (financially) what it takes to earn it. A little debt won't kill you, and when you pay it off, you will feel so empowered and strong.

 

[plickfu]

I can't believe you people are still bitching about the fact that your parents don't plan on supporting you through your 30's.
Get over it.
Then, get a job.

 

[Perrin]

I'm sitting on about 42K debt for undergrad. Knowing that I'm paying with my money was motivation to go to class everyday and try to do well. I know that 200K debt after med school is going to motivate me to try my best so that I can one day pay it off. I can't imagine dropping out of med school with ~150K debt and trying to pay it off with only a BS degree.

 

[LSU-Tech]

Riiiight. So if your parents were willing to help you out a bit you'd turn it down just to show how independent you are? I doubt it. And what's the point of being a parent and having money if you can't help your kids out? I have every intention of helping my kids pay for college and grad school and whatever else they feel like doing.

I don’t think it’s the fact that her parents are helping her that pisses everyone off. Like I said in my previous post, “It’s great that they help her out, as any loving parent who could afford it would”. However, they have cut her off since she is now an adult. She is now complaining because she has to deal with the same problems every other American has to deal with, when they go to med school. I realize life has not been a bed of roses for this girl. However, she said her father makes $80,000 a year. That’s not exactly living in poverty and I’m sure they would come though if see was in med school and starving to death. It sounds to me like they want to see what see is capable of doing on her on. They are not being mean to her, they are doing the biggest favor they have ever done for her; giving her a crash course in life. I’m sure all of us have experienced some sort of hardship at one point. This is called the trials and tribulations of life. Would I let my parents pay for med school, IF THEY COULD AFFORD TO PUT $200,000 TOWARDS MY EDUCATION? (Absolutely) Do I think I would appreciate it and try as hard if I didn’t have the constant uncertainty of not completing med school, with $100,000 in debt and halfway though. NO! I think loans a good incentive to bust your gluteus and get though med school.

 

[ursulamajor]

An $80K income is not poor. Get over that misconception quick.

Waxing and cell phones are luxuries, not necessities. So, for that matter, is having a car at many schools. A bicycle works well, keeps you in shape, and doesn't require insurance or gasoline.

I would suggest reading up on how to create and follow a budget before you go off on your own. Suze Orman, much as I find her annoying, probably has some suggestions for you.

I like the suggestion someone made of taking a year off to work and live independently before you go to med school. Not only should you be able to save some money, but it will give you some time to grow up and learn to manage money successfully.

 

[Psycho Doctor]

I can't believe you people are still bitching about the fact that your parents don't plan on supporting you through your 30's.
Get over it.
Then, get a job.

i can't believe people are bitching about not being able to continue "waxing" i really thought it had to be a joke

 

[on_the_fence]

I would suggest reading up on how to create and follow a budget before you go off on your own. Suze Orman, much as I find her annoying, probably has some suggestions for you.

I just bought The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, & Broke by Suze. She basically says that debt for education is a good kind of debt, whereas debt acquired due to eyebrow waxing and a cell phone is bad debt. 🙂

She is definitely a good resource!

I had never thought about loans being an incentive to stay in medical school, but I completley understand the reasoning ... it would be rather difficult to pay off med school loans with just a BS.

 

[Psycho Doctor]

I just bought The Money Book for the Young, Fabulous, & Broke by Suze. She basically says that debt for education is a good kind of debt, whereas debt acquired due to eyebrow waxing and a cell phone is bad debt. 🙂

She is definitely a good resource!

I had never thought about loans being an incentive to stay in medical school, but I completley understand the reasoning ... it would be rather difficult to pay off med school loans with just a BS.

uh i didn't need to read a book to know that 😛 It's common sense which i hope all med-school bound have figured out by now

 

[jrae]

My dad and mom agreed when they got married that he would pay for all kids' college education. They divorced. I stopped talking to him when I was 14. He filed bankruptcy and burnt his house to the ground after the bank officially declared it theirs-- all to avoid paying my mom child support. I didn't talk to him for several years and when it came time to apply for financial aid in college, I told my college that I was not in contact with him. If any of you are in a position where you legitimately do not talk or have contact with a parent, I would suggest you pass that information on to your financial aid office. Some med schools do not allow it. As such, I had my father this time write a letter, and get it notarized, as to his financial status and why he doesn't file taxes. If you are really in a bind, the college will see it. If you're not, the college will see through anything you try to tell them. Atleast in my case, this worked.

That's one sad dad....mine attepted to terminate his parental rights when I was 2 to avoid paying child support to....personally I don't think it's right for them to consider parental income beyond costodial parents.

As for waxing, you can always do it at home for a fraction of the price.

 

[Karina]

I was trying to make a point with the waxing! Next time I'll remember that everything you write online has literal meaning and that it is hard to be sarcastic and common conversational wit! Geeeeezzz....!

Anyways, I think it is all being taken out of context. I have not once complained about my parents. I love them to death and I can't wait until I start making money, so they DON'T HAVE TO WORK ANYMORE and I get to take care of THEM! Nothing will bring me more satisfaction.

I am just a little bit scared about the massive amount of money I'll be borrowing. I know I'm not the only one. I know some people have it worse (go back to original post!), but I am entitled to feel this way...aren't I? It's something I have never done before...and it's normal to be a little bit scared...I'm only human. It doesn't make me any less of an adult, I think. I'm ready for it...and I know I'll be fine. Isn't everyone here going like "Dang! that's a $h*t load of money!" right now???? And aren't we all gonna just do it?!
I have been in work force for a while and I know how to budget, I know how hard it is to make money...and I'm very good with it...I worked wonders to put myself through school working part time jobs! I can handle this!

I wonder if the fact that I'm hispanic....and a recent immigrant has anything to do with this. I don't like debt...but I want to be a doctor and there is no other way around it...so what can I do? Give up my dream? I don't think so...

I think we should close this thread...before someone else brings up the waxing thing again 😛

 

[tinkerbelle]

I was trying to make a point with the waxing! Next time I'll remember that everything you write online has literal meaning and that it is hard to be sarcastic and common conversational wit! Geeeeezzz....!

I am just a little bit scared about the massive amount of money I'll be borrowing. I know I'm not the only one. I know some people have it worse (go back to original post!), but I am entitled to feel this way...aren't I?

Yeah, I understand what you're saying. I'm hesitant to borrow so much money as well. When I first figured out how much in debt i'd be, I complained to my mom non-stop 😛 She offered to give me some money just to shut me up I'd be nice if i just happened to find 200 k on the street. It would solve all my problems....

 

[chocolate-e]

Hey people, be nice! 🙂

To the OP: I can definitely sympathize with being scared by the massive amount of debt looming! It's not that I think somebody else should be paying for it; it's just that I wish I could pay for it myself upfront. And I really, really wish I could pay for the everyday stuff (clothes, gas, toothpaste, etc.) with something other than loan money. I'm kind of hoping to find a part-time job during the 1st two years, but I don't know whether that will really be feasible or not.

 

[tinkerbelle]

I'm kind of hoping to find a part-time job during the 1st two years, but I don't know whether that will really be feasible or not.

I was hoping to do that too. I'm trying to decide whether the few bucks I make is worth losing study time/relaxing time. It'd be nice to have spending money though.

 

[Karina]

I was thinking about that too. I just got a license that allows me to write car/homeowners/umbrellas/personal articles/blah blah insurance in Florida. I can do bank stuff also. I work for a rather large insurance company and my boss has hinted that I could just work a few hours during the week(end)...appointments only...she'll pay me hourly plus the commission I'll be making...sounds tempting...but I dunno. I still have to think about it.

 

[crys20]

You could always give it a try. It would probably be more feasible 1st year than 2nd year. But no one I know works...But I'm sure it probably could be done on a real low hour per week basis.

 

[tinkerbelle]

I wonder if the fact that I'm hispanic....and a recent immigrant has anything to do with this.

Gosh. I assumed you were Russian from your screenname 😛

 

[Karina]

Gosh. I assumed you were Russian from your screenname 😛

Hah! I'm actually Dominican. And my mom's name is Olga...I think there's a thing for Russian names in my family 😛 My mom got mine from reading Ana Karenina by L. Tosltoi 🙂

 

[tinkerbelle]

I was thinking about that too. I just got a license that allows me to write car/homeowners/umbrellas/personal articles/blah blah insurance in Florida. I can do bank stuff also. I work for a rather large insurance company and my boss has hinted that I could just work a few hours during the week(end)...appointments only...she'll pay me hourly plus the commission I'll be making...sounds tempting...but I dunno. I still have to think about it.

See, that sounds like a good and flexible job. You could always start it, and then cut back or stop if you think it's too much. Where will you be going to med school? You could always ask current students what the work load is like.

 

[tinkerbelle]

Hah! I'm actually Dominican. And my mom's name is Olga...I think there's a thing for Russian names in my family 😛 My mom got mine from reading Ana Karenina by L. Tosltoi 🙂

That's awesome 😀 My name is actually Russian... and people are sooooo confused because I look more Spanish or Middle Eastern.

 

[Karina]

See, that sounds like a good and flexible job. You could always start it, and then cut back or stop if you think it's too much. Where will you be going to med school? You could always ask current students what the work load is like.

I think the workload is going to be a lot wherever I go! 😛 But I've worked during undergrad. I'll be going to Nova Southeastern University this fall...which means I could stay in Florida. I am waitlisted at NJMS and AECOM. So I don't know if I should keep holding on to those two...I think I'm just gonna go to NSU and stay in warm, sunny, Florida 🙂
Where will you be going?

 

[Karina]

That's awesome 😀 My name is actually Russian... and people are sooooo confused because I look more Spanish or Middle Eastern.

What's your name if you don't mind me asking? People don't get confused by me...I look dominican from miles away 😛

 

[tinkerbelle]

What's your name if you don't mind me asking? People don't get confused by me...I look dominican from miles away 😛

Well, I won't post it on here, but I'll PM it to you 🙂

 

[tinkerbelle]

I think the workload is going to be a lot wherever I go! 😛 But I've worked during undergrad. I'll be going to Nova Southeastern University this fall...which means I could stay in Florida. I am waitlisted at NJMS and AECOM. So I don't know if I should keep holding on to those two...I think I'm just gonna go to NSU and stay in warm, sunny, Florida 🙂
Where will you be going?

True. But sometimes I think you'll have less time for a job if you go to a school that has class from 9-5 and then expects you to study afterwards. Florida sounds nice.... lucky you 🙂 I'm still holding on to a few acceptances, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to UMaryland. We only have class/lab from 8-noon, so it seems like i can work without getting too stressed out.