Yay, I have a doctorate -- nobody cares

Started by DD214_DOC
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DD214_DOC

DD214_DOC

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So the day of graduation was great. How long does it take to actually matter?

I shall preface this by saying I am completely not a prick at all. I'm about the most laid-back person there is. I don't expect anyone who has known me as "HooahDOC" before to suddenly start calling me, "Dr. HooahDOC" -- I wouldn't want them to. However, it's a bit irritating that people who only know me through other people, despite knowing about the degree, still insist on using my first name. I always use Mr./Ms./Mrs. for people I'm not very familiar with. Is this long-lost etiquette or something? It seems the only people who really care are other physicians.

Maybe I'm just in the post-graduation honeymoon period and want a little recognition. Am I just being an ass? I don't think a little respect from complete strangers is too much to ask.
 
If they weren't introduced to you in a professional setting, why would they call you "Dr.?" I'd be really freaked out if I was at a party, met a friend's friend, and he called me "Dr. Al" while we were talking.
 
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Think back to how many stranger doctors you called "Dr. _____" when you met them in a non-professional setting.
 
respect is pretty much gone; it's kind of still here in the south. you can't really expect much anymore. to me, you should always respect them in a non-professional setting or professional setting unless told otherwise or you actually get to know them very well. even then, when introducing them, you should still say their name with the title...

maybe "freaked out" is the wrong phrase? I don't get why you would get freaked out by getting called a title it took you yrs of training for...if it's some house party, yeah...
 
You will get tired (or grow to hate) the title of "doctor" roughly a third of the way through intern year ... maybe halfway if you have a strong spirit :meanie:

Outside of clinics, I don't introduce myself as "doctor" and I don't expect other people to call me Dr. Lastname. I find it weird and awkward. Once at the optometrist office (as a new patient, had to fill out demographics), as soon as the receptionist found out my occupation was "physician", she started calling me "doctor last name" throughout the rest of the visit (and subsequent visits). I would have prefer that she stuck with "Mr. last name" but I wasn't going to correct her (or bring it to anyone's attention since sometimes bringing it up is worse than leaving it alone). Even the optometrist called me Dr. Last name.

I can understand the rationale - you want to be respectful (and for older generations and a lot of younger generation, it's also proper etiquette).

I also understand the hard work, long hours, sacrifices, and $$$ that you put into to earn that doctorate. And as time goes on, and you get more experience in the professional capacity, more and more people will refer you as "Doctor HooahDoc".
 
Why would you want people to call you Dr in a casual setting? The only time I use Mr/Mrs is when the individuals are clearly my elders (as a sign of respect). I would, honestly, never call a peer Mr/Mrs.

I used to have a next door neighbor who was crazy about the Dr/MD thing. He went to medical school in Mexico, and INSISTED on being called Dr. On everything he owned, he wrote XX, MD. Like no joke, everything. We'd borrow a basketball from him and it would say that. He'd also correct people with, "it's actually Dr XX," etc. Everyone resented him for it and thought he was a tool. People are going to call you Dr in your practice, hospital, etc.

Don't be "that guy" ...
 
JaggerPlate said:
Why would you want people to call you Dr in a casual setting? The only time I use Mr/Mrs is when the individuals are clearly my elders (as a sign of respect). I would, honestly, never call a peer Mr/Mrs.

I used to have a next door neighbor who was crazy about the Dr/MD thing. He went to medical school in Mexico, and INSISTED on being called Dr. On everything he owned, he wrote XX, MD. Like no joke, everything. We'd borrow a basketball from him and it would say that. He'd also correct people with, "it's actually Dr XX," etc. Everyone resented him for it and thought he was a tool. People are going to call you Dr in your practice, hospital, etc.

Don't be "that guy" ...
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Haha yeahh I agree I feel like if your meeting people in a social/casual setting its very tool-like to say hey im Dr. so and so, but I don't see any problem with the optomitrist visit, etc when you have to fill out your name and title, you earned it and I think its awesome. If I knew someone was a doctor in my practice I'd always say Dr. unless told otherwise, its the respectful thing to do IMO.
 
I can't think of a single resident or (in the vast majority of cases) attendings that I've spent time outside of the hospital that didn't prefer I call them Jack or Jill instead of Dr. Jack or Dr. Jill. In the hospital, yes, I will always refer to my attendings at Doctor. At the bar, we're all just trying to get drunk. Having someone get uptight because you left the Dr. title off their name is a buzzkill and screams insecurity.
 
Colbert said:
I can't think of a single resident or (in the vast majority of cases) attendings that I've spent time outside of the hospital that didn't prefer I call them Jack or Jill instead of Dr. Jack or Dr. Jill. In the hospital, yes, I will always refer to my attendings at Doctor. At the bar, we're all just trying to get drunk. Having someone get uptight because you left the Dr. title off their name is a buzzkill and screams insecurity.
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You're entirely missing the point. If you're at the bar with these people, then you obviously know them well enough to be on a first-name basis with them. It's really not any different from using "Mr/Ms/Mrs" for anyone else .. or do you not do that, either?
 
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I can't say I can relate at all. I'm doing this whole for myself. I worked hard in school and put in the hours just to get to medical school, but I've done it all for myself. I, not acquaintances at the bar, chose this path for me. I want to gain the skills that come with the title of "Doctor." People on the street don't need show deference - I'm just a normal guy who happened to want to be a physician. I'll be happy with a simple "thanks" post-treatment. I'd also appreciate it if they didn't sue me.

In my 22 short years of life, all I've seen is that you don't demand respect. That will never work. You gain it. Having a title? What is a title? Congressman, Doctor, Archbishop, Chef, Plumber - they all mean nothing to me and I'm sure many out there feel the same way. Show me why I should respect you. Show me that you can work hard and be responsible. After that, maybe.

Is there room for tradition? Of course. Just FYI, I always refer to those older than me as "Dr./Mr./Mrs./etc."
 
The only people I address as "Dr." are professors in the academic setting and physicians when they are working in the patient setting. Almost every doc I have worked with usually preferred to be on a first name basis in a casual/social setting. Unless there was a huge age difference or profound desire to be ultra respectful to much-senior colleagues.
 
HooahDOc said:
So the day of graduation was great. How long does it take to actually matter?

I shall preface this by saying I am completely not a prick at all. I'm about the most laid-back person there is. I don't expect anyone who has known me as "HooahDOC" before to suddenly start calling me, "Dr. HooahDOC" -- I wouldn't want them to. However, it's a bit irritating that people who only know me through other people, despite knowing about the degree, still insist on using my first name. I always use Mr./Ms./Mrs. for people I'm not very familiar with. Is this long-lost etiquette or something? It seems the only people who really care are other physicians.

Maybe I'm just in the post-graduation honeymoon period and want a little recognition. Am I just being an ass? I don't think a little respect from complete strangers is too much to ask.
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Would you be saying this if you would have graduated with a Doctorate in Dance Studies? I really doubt it. So if the reason you want to be called Dr. is physician related, whats wrong with keeping it in a physician/professional setting?
 
OP - You're probably going through a subtle form of stress relief...follow me here --

You've just been through what could arguably be one of the more difficult challenges (albeit on an academic/emotional/to some extent physical) in
your life to this point. As your moniker suggests a 'military' association, I'm assuming no combat/actual ops experience type challenges......

So now that you've got this achievement, of which you can be justly proud, you want people to know about it but can't figure out a way to do it and don't want to sound like a gushing schoolgirl in every conversation by saying,"Hey, did you know that I just graduated from medical school!".

It's ok. I introduced myself to my son's school nurse whom I had never met before when I had to drop off some meds s/p tooth extraction as,"Hi, I'm Dr. JustPlainBill"....it's amazing what difference that one word makes - 'Dr.'.....that certainly qualified for a douche-bag moment, but not starting intern year yet, it was cool in a childish way.

In a social setting, and to the admin-types, nurses and everyone else at the program I'm going to, I tell them to call me by my first name. Some of the older admins insist on calling me Dr. but I insist (repeatedly sometimes) that they call me by my first name.

One of my early upper levels told me something that I still recall about this whole topic - he said that when we were in the call room or amongst ourselves with no other ancillary staff or patients around, I was to call him by his first name. When we were around patients or anyone outside our team, it was 'Dr.'.....and that was more for inspiring patient/staff confidence than anything else. Now, I personally had respect for the man and his ability and demeanor and did not mind calling him Dr. in any setting.

I guess I'm saying that I weigh in on the approach of not insisting on being called Dr. In my mind, it makes the person seem egotistical.
 
I think on some level you're probably right. The day after graduation didn't feel any different from the day before, and in this strange limbo period between finishing med school and starting intern year I'm searching for some sort of confirmation or validation that the past four years is actually over. I'm sure this will all become a moot point when I report for duty on June 06.

And for the record, I'm not the tool who insists everyone calls him doctor. I also don't introduce myself as such. I just thought it was a bit weird that people with whom I'm not very familiar, despite knowing about the title, still refused to use it.
 
Your original post was on 5/25/10. Didn't you just graduate three days earlier? Call me crazy, but your concerns may be just a bit premature!!
 
It's Dr. Evil, I didn't spend six years in Evil Medical School to be called "mister," thank you very much.
 
CK8652 said:
Would you be saying this if you would have graduated with a Doctorate in Dance Studies? I really doubt it. So if the reason you want to be called Dr. is physician related, whats wrong with keeping it in a physician/professional setting?
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For some weird reason, this would not surprise me.

I have never considered the 'stress relief' angle as the reason for the title-seeking douchebaggery that can happen post-graduation. I have only known one person (small n) who really wanted-demanded basically-to be called doctor in all settings. They graduated from a Carib Med School and failed each step >2 times, except Step 2 CS. I can't imagine the stress he felt when he was conferred that degree. He would find ways to interject him being a doctor into EVERY situation imaginable. 'Why yes waiter, the doctor would like another sushi roll. Bwahahahaha.' Tool.

I can absolutely understand you wanting the title as nothing more than a sign of respect for all the hard work you have put in. Unfortunately, this is one of those things that is very, very hard to do without looking like a complete ass.
 
MojoRisin said:
For some weird reason, this would not surprise me.

I have never considered the 'stress relief' angle as the reason for the title-seeking douchebaggery that can happen post-graduation. I have only known one person (small n) who really wanted-demanded basically-to be called doctor in all settings. They graduated from a Carib Med School and failed each step >2 times, except Step 2 CS. I can't imagine the stress he felt when he was conferred that degree. He would find ways to interject him being a doctor into EVERY situation imaginable. 'Why yes waiter, the doctor would like another sushi roll. Bwahahahaha.' Tool.

I can absolutely understand you wanting the title as nothing more than a sign of respect for all the hard work you have put in. Unfortunately, this is one of those things that is very, very hard to do without looking like a complete ass.
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Your patients will care! I've never been on a first name basis with a doc taking care of me. . .

Think of it like being a super hero. When you have your white coat on, you're Doctor Man... when you take it off you assume your secret Identity: Bob. 🙂
 
as an intern I use Dr. LastName for patients and parents that I just met (in the ED, acute care clinic, on the floor). A lot of times I go by Doctor Jon if that feels right... all the nurses and other staff I just go by jon (unless I'm calling the outside pharmacies or even the big pharmacy at the hospital or the lab then it's Dr. LastName - it gets things happening much quicker). With some of the parents that are my age that I've gotten to know well throughout this year I will sometimes go by Jon...

As far as socially outside of the hospital, we have some friends who have elementary school aged kids. They want their kids to call adults Mr. and Mrs. LastName. I have no problem with this and will likely do the same thingwiht my kids someday, but it's just REALLY wierd to have everyone else called Mr. and Mrs. and then I'm Dr. LastName.

The one thing I haven't done (mainly because it's a small area where I live and there's a lot of doctors in the area so it wouldn't work here), but at some point I'm going to take my pager with me when my wife and I go out to eat and say "I'm a doctor and I'm on call right now and need to get a table immediately" - just to see if it works! 😉
 
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I work in a large childrens hospital in Texas and we're on a first name basis with all of the docs in and out of the hospital. Our PICU medical director mandated that only first names be used in the PICU..no hierarchy. Titles are for the insecure. IMHO
 
"It's Doctor Linus, actually."

800px-6x07_DoctorLinus.jpg
 
PICUPNP said:
I work in a large childrens hospital in Texas and we're on a first name basis with all of the docs in and out of the hospital. Our PICU medical director mandated that only first names be used in the PICU..no hierarchy. Titles are for the insecure. IMHO
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Yet you have your title is in your screen name on an anonymous forum....🙄
 
csmittyB said:
Yet you have your title is in your screen name on an anonymous forum....🙄
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Haha dude this person has done nothing to disturb the thread. Granted many of us are a bit sensitive to the whole NP and PA as Doctors issue but I really think your attack is unwarranted. (I havn't read the persons old posts but this one seems fine.)

Besides, you probably shouldn't start provoking things like this before you've started school.
 
csmittyB said:
Yet you have your title is in your screen name on an anonymous forum....🙄
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Am I on Allnurses again by mistake...oh my😱

Only a screen name rookie! I go by my first name whether it be with parents, pediatricians ,or other. The OP was whining about how nobody is bowing down now that he has Dr in front of his name. We are all humans on the same level but not the same education. The days of nurses giving up their chair or getting coffee for the docs are long gone. Good Luck in medical school! I sincerely wish you the best👍
 
TeamZissou said:
Haha dude this person has done nothing to disturb the thread. Granted many of us are a bit sensitive to the whole NP and PA as Doctors issue but I really think your attack is unwarranted. (I havn't read the persons old posts but this one seems fine.)
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Pointing out the irony of a the comment
titles are for the insecure
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when the poster has their title in their screen name is an attack😕 I didn't bash the poster b/c they are an NP. I would have made the same comment if it was xxxxxMD/DO/PhD.


Besides, you probably shouldn't start provoking things like this before you've started school.
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Your right. I'm just a lowly "pre-med". Its not like I've spent the past 2 years working as tech in a hospital alongside MD, DO's, RNs, NPs, LVNs, etc.....:idea: oh wait, I have been doing that. Do those qualifications allow me to start "provoking" (not that I did) things?

Not that it matters, but I fully respect all my coworkers including NPs.
 
PICUPNP said:
Am I on Allnurses again by mistake...oh my😱

Only a screen name rookie! I go by my first name whether it be with parents, pediatricians ,or other. The OP was whining about how nobody is bowing down now that he has Dr in front of his name. We are all humans on the same level but not the same education. The days of nurses giving up their chair or getting coffee for the docs are long gone. Good Luck in medical school! I sincerely wish you the best👍
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I hope it didn't offend you, it was just innocent teasing. If you had MD/DO/PhD in your name I would have said the same thing. I wasn't meant as an attack against you as an NP.
 
csmittyB said:
Pointing out the irony of a the comment when the poster has their title in their screen name is an attack😕 I didn't bash the poster b/c they are an NP. I would have made the same comment if it was xxxxxMD/DO/PhD.

Your right. I'm just a lowly "pre-med". Its not like I've spent the past 2 years working as tech in a hospital alongside MD, DO's, RNs, NPs, LVNs, etc.....:idea: oh wait, I have been doing that. Do those qualifications allow me to start "provoking" (not that I did) things?

Not that it matters, but I fully respect all my coworkers including NPs.
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I wish you would have just given the explanation in the first place.

And I don't care what you did prior to med school. When you walk in the door with your classmates you're all on even footing again. (and in response to another thread) Yes, that means you're just the same as the kid who got the 22 MCAT and got in.

That being said I don't give credence to anyone's statements until they earn it, regardless of what point they are at in their career. Just imagine some of your classmates who you wouldn't want treating your family (or your dog), they can sit on here and write anything they want...
 
PICUPNP said:
The days of nurses giving up their chair or getting coffee for the docs are long gone. Good Luck in medical school! I sincerely wish you the best👍
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He makes a humorous observation and all of a sudden he thinks nurses should be subservient to doctors? And you top it off with insincere well wishes. Nice.

csmittyB said:
I hope it didn't offend you, it was just innocent teasing. If you had MD/DO/PhD in your name I would have said the same thing. I wasn't meant as an attack against you as an NP.
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Have some self-respect. She made a ridiculous jump in logic. Stand up for yourself.
 
HooahDOc said:
It's awesome to see how a post originally meant to discuss the dying use of honorifics has degenerated into a discussion about my assumed, "insecurity" and desire to be "bowed down" to.


👍
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Welcome to SDN, where everything devolves into DO vs MD, or Dr vs Some other field that wants to be called Dr
 
HooahDOc said:
It's awesome to see how a post originally meant to discuss the dying use of honorifics has degenerated into a discussion about my assumed, "insecurity" and desire to be "bowed down" to.


👍
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As I probably aided and abetted this degeneration of topic, I apologize for that and will try to wrest it back to it's original purpose as stated above ---

Dr. HooahDOc - I personally feel it's a general problem overtaking our society. In my era, adults were addressed as Mr./Mrs./Dr./Rev Whatever by children. No matter how long you had known them, no matter how many times they had been over to the house for dinner, period. End of Discussion. Children were seen and not heard and they were a reflection of their parents. Misbehavior was dealt with swiftly and severely as misbehaving children were seen as a sign of bad parenting. Now, I'm sure that led to all manner of abuse, but overall, a 'look' from Mom (to say nothing of Dad) was all it took to bring most people into line.....

Segue to as recently as the late 90's - I jumped dead in the middle of someone's action when a 13 year old called my elderly father by his first name in order to get his attention to initiate a conversation and spoke to him as an equal. Sorry - that's not in my lexicon of acceptable behavior. Her parents did not offer comment nor did they take issue with my behavior which tells me that they agreed with it.

It's happening all over - witness 'whale tails' being cool, young men modeling prison behavior as cool (pants around hips to show off underwear) and a general lack of decency in society.

Times have changed - All you can do is model the behavior you find acceptable, raise your progeny to your standards and you may find yourself saying,"We're not like other people. Things that are ok for them are not ok for us. We're held to a higher standard' and let it go at that.

Sorry for rambling- had an incident yesterday that opened this can of worms and produced teachable moments for the family.
 
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I'm just an allopath who got lost on the way to my forum. M2 in August.

OP, I'm a couple years behind you, but I can see what you're saying. For me, it would kind of matter who it is and by what means / through who I'm known -- but any kind of recognition of the past four years of my life would be, you know, nice.

Have met a couple people who actually like being addressed as "doc", which I always thought was kinda nice -- a cross between friendly/laid back (like you, OP) and at least acknowledging what you are.
 
TeamZissou said:
I wish you would have just given the explanation in the first place.
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The fact that I never mentioned NPs in my post should have clued people in that I wasn't trying to pick a fight with a NP. Others took my comment as an opportunity to attack NPs.

TeamZissou said:
And I don't care what you did prior to med school. When you walk in the door with your classmates you're all on even footing again. (and in response to another thread) Yes, that means you're just the same as the kid who got the 22 MCAT and got in.
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I don't dispute that, but it is completely irrelevant. You said that I shouldn't provoke things until starting med school; like walking through those hallowed doors suddenly confers something beyond being a medical student. I mentioned what I do to show that I may have a little more perspective than the average pre-med.

TeamZissou said:
That being said I don't give credence to anyone's statements until they earn it, regardless of what point they are at in their career. Just imagine some of your classmates who you wouldn't want treating your family (or your dog), they can sit on here and write anything they want...
Click to expand...

Makes sense.
 
csmittyB said:
The fact that I never mentioned NPs in my post should have clued people in that I wasn't trying to pick a fight with a NP. Others took my comment as an opportunity to attack NPs.


I don't dispute that, but it is completely irrelevant. You said that I shouldn't provoke things until starting med school; like walking through those hallowed doors suddenly confers something beyond being a medical student. I mentioned what I do to show that I may have a little more perspective than the average pre-med.



Makes sense.
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You were just pointing out how ironic it is that someone who said titles are for the insecure has a title in their name. Some people on here are just so smart they can't understand this. It goes down hill from there. The nurse starts calling people rookie, because they forgot they were new at one time too. Bet a rookie doctor would smoke a rookie nurse any day though 🙂
 
csmittyB said:
The fact that I never mentioned NPs in my post should have clued people in that I wasn't trying to pick a fight with a NP. Others took my comment as an opportunity to attack NPs.
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Yup that's unfortunate. It's really not a big deal, I enjoy sarcasm but just didn't know you were using it😉



csmittyB said:
I don't dispute that, but it is completely irrelevant. You said that I shouldn't provoke things until starting med school; like walking through those hallowed doors suddenly confers something beyond being a medical student. I mentioned what I do to show that I may have a little more perspective than the average pre-med.
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Eh, I don't mean to have this be directed only at you. In general don't think "walking through those hallowed doors" makes any difference. There are still idiots who are MS-IV's and there are idiots who are attendings. (ex: Surfer in the Anesthesiology forum) But I will tell you know that when you take your first few big tests those can be eye openers and quite humbling, if not then good for you (or anyone else who does it).
 
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