Being forced to work more due to a divorce

[addoncase]

Thanks for examples you have outlined for couples with one salary stream.

Are you doing counseling? Preferably with someone that specializes in EFT? Does the messed up stuff only come out during arguments or is there a baseline level of contempt that is present in regular interactions? Does she want a better relationship or does she have both feet out the door and only interacts in order to keep you emotionally distant?

A lot of couples have repetitive conflict where both sides act in a rote way and each person's negative thoughts feeds off their partners responses. In couples that go on to develop intimate and functional relationships, both sides commit to viewing "the cycle" as the enemy rather than each other. Even if this relationship doesn't work out, it's worth figuring out what you bring into the cycle so you can recognize what makes you fall into it and how to avoid suffering and inflicting the damage being in the cycle causes in future relationships.

I bolded the responses. It’s not every waking minute the arguments but when they occurred she more directs me to go do this and that to improve the relationship. She insists the problems are all me and that I am the ONLY one that has to improve things but to be fair I don’t think relationship problems are only due to one persons interpersonal or personality problems or whatever you want to call it.

She does after a while admit that maybe she needs to also come to counseling or whatever it is we end up decided to do

It was much worse and frequent before but now that I have basically given her the life that’s as close as possible to what she wants that I can feasibly achieve it’s improved.

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[Arcan57]

Thanks for examples you have outlined for couples with one salary stream.


I bolded the responses. It’s not every waking minute the arguments but when they occurred she more directs me to go do this and that to improve the relationship. She insists the problems are all me and that I am the ONLY one that has to improve things but to be fair I don’t think relationship problems are only due to one persons interpersonal or personality problems or whatever you want to call it.

She does after a while admit that maybe she needs to also come to counseling or whatever it is we end up decided to do

It was much worse and frequent before but now that I have basically given her the life that’s as close as possible to what she wants that I can feasibly achieve it’s improved.

Are you communicating what you need in the relationship? It can be easy to fall into the trap of "if I can just make her happy, we'll both be happy". Or "she should know what I need and the fact that I'm not getting it means she's deliberately choosing to deny me". Both of these ideas lead to you feeling miserable and unfulfilled, and if you're miserable and unfulfilled in the relationship it's going to suck to be around you.

 

[RustedFox]

This is Borderline PD. Has to be.

 

[Porfirio]

 

[hundreddaysoff]

A lot of couples have repetitive conflict where both sides act in a rote way and each person's negative thoughts feeds off their partners responses. In couples that go on to develop intimate and functional relationships, both sides commit to viewing "the cycle" as the enemy rather than each other. Even if this relationship doesn't work out, it's worth figuring out what you bring into the cycle so you can recognize what makes you fall into it and how to avoid suffering and inflicting the damage being in the cycle causes in future relationships.

Quoted for truth. This was precisely the reason my wife and I were unhappy for several years.

FWIW, things that improved the situation were

(1) both of us learning what her real needs were and meeting them (hard because she didn't know herself what her actual needs were at first, vs desires or just effects of neuroses or other maladaptive stuff), and

(2) my wife experimenting with a lesser-known therapeutic modality called Parts Therapy or Parts Work on herself.

Parts Work, in my troglodyte understanding, assumes that we're all crazy to an extent because we all have multiple or alternate personae or "parts" that sometimes drive our decisions, and many of us are unaware when this happens. Parts Work helped my wife develop some useful narratives about what her crazy parts are and how to sense them and handle them when they act up. She has practiced this a lot and makes her much better at ignoring my nonsense when I get emotional. We are also now much better at disengaging from little disagreements instead of starting cyclical dogfights. (Nothing good has ever come from us arguing about the argument...)

 

[RustedFox]

Quoted for truth. This was precisely the reason my wife and I were unhappy for several years.

FWIW, things that improved the situation were

(1) both of us learning what her real needs were and meeting them (hard because she didn't know herself what her actual needs were at first, vs desires or just effects of neuroses or other maladaptive stuff), and

(2) my wife experimenting with a lesser-known therapeutic modality called Parts Therapy or Parts Work on herself.

Parts Work, in my troglodyte understanding, assumes that we're all crazy to an extent because we all have multiple or alternate personae or "parts" that sometimes drive our decisions, and many of us are unaware when this happens. Parts Work helped my wife develop some useful narratives about what her crazy parts are and how to sense them and handle them when they act up. She has practiced this a lot and makes her much better at ignoring my nonsense when I get emotional. We are also now much better at disengaging from little disagreements instead of starting cyclical dogfights. (Nothing good has ever come from us arguing about the argument...)

"I'm a woman. I don't know what I want." '

I kid, but at the same time there's an element of truth to it. My wife is neurotic AF as well and was miserable as a result of it for several years.

Problem? She set her own completely arbitrary, unrealistic goals and then was upset when they couldn't be accomplished, thus viewing herself as a failure.

Problem 2? This was plain as day to me, but when I attempted to explain this, I was "just trying to put her down" (I'm not)

Problem 3? I "couldn't tell" that she was upset, primarily because she kept quiet about it. Really, girls - we don't hear 100% of the things you don't say. Use your words.

Oh, nevermind. Women are all crazy. At least a 4 on the scale, as indicated in the diagram above.

 

[CoolDoc1729]

View attachment 380371

This made me laugh because one of my in laws is named Tiffany and she is in fact crazy AF. However she would be at the sad upper left on your graph 🤣

 

[emergentmd]

Heed warnings. Date atleast 2 years before marriage. Act yourself and change only if you want to not to keep the other one happy. If you are meant to be together, changes will happen organically b/c you put the other person first. If the relationship does not make you happy, then it will get worse when you are married.

Don't rush, you have time.

Reading some of the marriages should be a huge warning to take it slowly and heed red flags.

I have had 3 real relationships in my life and never had a crazy GF/Wife. I would put all 3 in the 8+ hot and in the 2 standard deviation on the low end of the crazy scale. Yes, all women have some craziness. Even my 1st two relationships of 2+ yrs ( I don't count anything under 1 yr as real), they were all normal/happy girls with little drama and we almost never fought. Even then, they just were not the one.

 

[Splenda88]

The truth of the matter is that the woman you marry needs to love you a little more than you love her. Meaning she understands (or realizes) she won't get a better deal if she leaves you.

 

[sloh]

The truth of the matter is that the woman you marry needs to love you a little more than you love her. Meaning she understands (or realizes) she won't get a better deal if she leaves you.

Also why SAHD arrangements never work. Man is emasculated, woman feels like a man. Higher depression, anxiety, insomnia for both. Higher erectile dysfunction for the male. Dead bedrooms.

 

[Arcan57]

The truth of the matter is that the woman you marry needs to love you a little more than you love her. Meaning she understands (or realizes) she won't get a better deal if she leaves you.

So it seems like you’re confusing security with control. The person that loves least controls most but your level of commitment isn’t inversely proportional to her likelihood of leaving. If you want a woman to love you so much that they’re blind to your faults, it can happen but it’s unlikely to sustain over a lifetime. Probably better to pick someone who values the relationship and can communicate what they need effectively.

 

[Splenda88]

So it seems like you’re confusing security with control. The person that loves least controls most but your level of commitment isn’t inversely proportional to her likelihood of leaving. If you want a woman to love you so much that they’re blind to your faults, it can happen but it’s unlikely to sustain over a lifetime. Probably better to pick someone who values the relationship and can communicate what they need effectively.

Actually it's security. You can call it control, but I view it as security.

No relationship (or any human relation) is a 50/50 regardless of what people say. There will ALWAYS be one entity that has more to lose. It's just how it is.

Relationships are hard. I am not saying people should be blind to people's faults.

 

[RustedFox]

Actually it's security. You can call it control, but I view it as security.

No relationship (or any human relation) is a 50/50 regardless of what people say. There will ALWAYS be one entity that has more to lose. It's just how it is.

Relationships are hard. I am not saying people should be blind to people's faults.

Related: There's no such thing as "unconditional love".
That's Disney nonsense.
Would you stay with your spouse if they became an unrepentant addict?
No? Didn't think so.
That's a condition.

 

[Splenda88]

Also why SAHD arrangements never work. Man is emasculated, woman feels like a man. Higher depression, anxiety, insomnia for both. Higher erectile dysfunction for the male. Dead bedrooms.

Stay-At-Home Dads More Likely To Divorce?

A new study has found that stay-at-home dads are more likely to divorce than those that are salaried. However, some say the divorce study is flawed.

www.mollybkenny.com

A man would be crazy to think his relationship would stand up to setbacks when he let his wife go into the workforce while he stays at home to be a SAHD.

 

[sloh]

Stay-At-Home Dads More Likely To Divorce?

A new study has found that stay-at-home dads are more likely to divorce than those that are salaried. However, some say the divorce study is flawed.

www.mollybkenny.com

A man would be crazy to think his relationship would stand up to setbacks when he let his wife go into the workforce while he stays at home to be a SAHD.

Evolutionary psychology never fails

 

[Splenda88]

Related: There's no such thing as "unconditional love".
That's Disney nonsense.
Would you stay with your spouse if they became an unrepentant addict?
No? Didn't think so.
That's a condition.

But the media pushes these nonsense and people buy them.

 

[RustedFox]

But the media pushes these nonsense and people buy them.

My wife actually hit me with the "unconditional love" line once. I said exactly what I posted above; "unconditional love" is Disney nonsense.

She protested.
I said to her: "You said to me, very clearly, that if I ever use any THC, that you're GONE."
Welp. That's a condition, honey.
[surprised pikachu face]

I agree. I'm rather anti-THC, and feel that it should be reserved for rather rigid medical criteria.
Not this: "I have anxiety, so I have my medical marijuana card" nonsense.
Get a grip, people.

 

[sloh]

My wife actually hit me with the "unconditional love" line once. I said exactly what I posted above; "unconditional love" is Disney nonsense.

She protested.
I said to her: "You said to me, very clearly, that if I ever use any THC, that you're GONE."
Welp. That's a condition, honey.
[surprised pikachu face]

I agree. I'm rather anti-THC, and feel that it should be reserved for rather rigid medical criteria.
Not this: "I have anxiety, so I have my medical marijuana card" nonsense.
Get a grip, people.

Heard a saying recently: “no man has ever been guilted into an erection.”

Unconditional love my a**

 

[BoardingDoc]

Also why SAHD arrangements never work. Man is emasculated, woman feels like a man. Higher depression, anxiety, insomnia for both. Higher erectile dysfunction for the male. Dead bedrooms.

Certainly not as common as SAHM, but I personally know a quite happily married couple where the wife has a high powered tech job and the husband is a quite content SAHD. They both seem very happy with this arrangement and while I'm not personally privy to the details of their sex life, I have no reason to believe it's suffering as you suggest.

 

[sloh]

Certainly not as common as SAHM, but I personally know a quite happily married couple where the wife has a high powered tech job and the husband is a quite content SAHD. They both seem very happy with this arrangement and while I'm not personally privy to the details of their sex life, I have no reason to believe it's suffering as you suggest.

“Do marriages go better when husbands are higher-status than wives?

This answer is the same as all the others: no for education, yes for income.

…which shows a “cliff” between the wife earning very slightly less than her husband, and very slightly more. Some of these marriages either ended in divorce, or never happened in the first place. The study claims that 23% of the decline in marriage comes from women being less able to find higher-earning men and unable to tolerate lower-earning ones, though I can’t begin to evaluate whether that’s true. Here is a funny article about how it’s hard to study this effect, because when wives earn more than their husbands, both partners lie about their incomes to deny this.”

References in actual article:

Hypergamy: Much More Than You Wanted To Know

...

www.astralcodexten.com

 

[Arcan57]

Actually it's security. You can call it control, but I view it as security.

No relationship (or any human relation) is a 50/50 regardless of what people say. There will ALWAYS be one entity that has more to lose. It's just how it is.

Relationships are hard. I am not saying people should be blind to people's faults.

You can view it as security, and I can understand that mindset. What I disagree with is that having less to lose has a significant long term protective effect on maintaining a happy relationship for the withholding spouse.

People that are dependent on their spouse are less likely to knowingly end the relationship, but that doesn’t mean they are any more likely to be faithful or loving towards their partner than if they weren’t dependent.

I’m not sure how you parse out making sure your spouse loves you more than you do them without wandering into some purposefully cruel territory. Either you’re both committed to the marriage or your not. If not, the marriage is going to fail unless you find a partner that is completely willing to subjugate themselves just for the title. Which is kinda abhorrent to me, but I can see why it would be appealing for some.

 

[Splenda88]

“Do marriages go better when husbands are higher-status than wives?

This answer is the same as all the others: no for education, yes for income.

…which shows a “cliff” between the wife earning very slightly less than her husband, and very slightly more. Some of these marriages either ended in divorce, or never happened in the first place. The study claims that 23% of the decline in marriage comes from women being less able to find higher-earning men and unable to tolerate lower-earning ones, though I can’t begin to evaluate whether that’s true. Here is a funny article about how it’s hard to study this effect, because when wives earn more than their husbands, both partners lie about their incomes to deny this.”

References in actual article:

Hypergamy: Much More Than You Wanted To Know

...

www.astralcodexten.com

This is evident to everyone who has not been living in a cave.

 

[BoardingDoc]

“Do marriages go better when husbands are higher-status than wives?

This answer is the same as all the others: no for education, yes for income.

…which shows a “cliff” between the wife earning very slightly less than her husband, and very slightly more. Some of these marriages either ended in divorce, or never happened in the first place. The study claims that 23% of the decline in marriage comes from women being less able to find higher-earning men and unable to tolerate lower-earning ones, though I can’t begin to evaluate whether that’s true. Here is a funny article about how it’s hard to study this effect, because when wives earn more than their husbands, both partners lie about their incomes to deny this.”

References in actual article:

Hypergamy: Much More Than You Wanted To Know

...

www.astralcodexten.com

I'm confused by your response. I'm not saying that there are or aren't social pressures related to being a stay at home dad with a wife who has a high powered job. I was simply responding to your absolute statement that that scenario never works (and apparently ends with an emasculated man and a dead sex life) with an anecdote to the contrary.

I feel like there are a lot of people posting on this topic who are arguing certain points very forcefully, but in a way which suggests that they are doing so less because of overwhelming evidence and more because of personal bitterness regarding the issue.

 

[Splenda88]

You can view it as security, and I can understand that mindset. What I disagree with is that having less to lose has a significant long term protective effect on maintaining a happy relationship for the withholding spouse.

People that are dependent on their spouse are less likely to knowingly end the relationship, but that doesn’t mean they are any more likely to be faithful or loving towards their partner than if they weren’t dependent.

I’m not sure how you parse out making sure your spouse loves you more than you do them without wandering into some purposefully cruel territory. Either you’re both committed to the marriage or your not. If not, the marriage is going to fail unless you find a partner that is completely willing to subjugate themselves just for the title. Which is kinda abhorrent to me, but I can see why it would be appealing for some.

I disagree. Love is conditional.

 

[Splenda88]

I'm confused by your response. I'm not saying that there are or aren't social pressures related to being a stay at home dad with a wife who has a high powered job. I was simply responding to your absolute statement that that scenario never works (and apparently ends with an emasculated man and a dead sex life) with an anecdote to the contrary.

I feel like there are a lot of people posting on this topic who are arguing certain points very forcefully, but in a way which suggests that they are doing so less because of overwhelming evidence and more because of personal bitterness regarding the issue.

You are a physician so you know NOTHING is absolute. People talk in generalities.

 

[sloh]

I'm confused by your response. I'm not saying that there are or aren't social pressures related to being a stay at home dad with a wife who has a high powered job. I was simply responding to your absolute statement that that scenario never works (and apparently ends with an emasculated man and a dead sex life) with an anecdote to the contrary.

I feel like there are a lot of people posting on this topic who are arguing certain points very forcefully, but in a way which suggests that they are doing so less because of overwhelming evidence and more because of personal bitterness regarding the issue.

Can you point to evidence that suggests the contrary besides personal anecdotes? Bc most of the evidence suggests these marriages lead to quite a bit of strife compared to the reverse scenario.

Wives Who Make More Than Their Husbands Should Take Note

When wives make more than their husbands, the husbands are more likely to cheat, and the couples are more likely to face divorce. Two divorce experts weigh in on why.

www.kiplinger.com

 

[sloh]

I'm confused by your response. I'm not saying that there are or aren't social pressures related to being a stay at home dad with a wife who has a high powered job. I was simply responding to your absolute statement that that scenario never works (and apparently ends with an emasculated man and a dead sex life) with an anecdote to the contrary.

I feel like there are a lot of people posting on this topic who are arguing certain points very forcefully, but in a way which suggests that they are doing so less because of overwhelming evidence and more because of personal bitterness regarding the issue.

Also across the income spectrum with the exception of the very right tail, women are pulling ahead of men. As a society it’s really in our best interest that women outearning their husbands or SAHD arrangements work out just as well, if not better than the traditional arrangement—couples would be happier and more content. I’d say personal bitterness would factor more into guys who can’t keep up with women when hearing their hetero relationships leave much to be desired.

 

[BoardingDoc]

You are a physician so you should know NOTHING is absolute. People talk in generalities.

That was sort of the point I'm trying to make. I simply chose this post to respond to but numerous people in this thread have been portraying their side of the argument as the absolute truth. If you're using absolute terminology is it unreasonable for people to take you at face value? Why would I assume a more moderate stance based on the language presented? I'm not trying to argue semantics, I'm trying to point out the way a lot of people sound in this thread. Much of it comes across as needlessly polarizing.

 

[BoardingDoc]

Can you point to evidence that suggests the contrary besides personal anecdotes? Bc most of the evidence suggests these marriages lead to quite a bit of strife compared to the reverse scenario.

Wives Who Make More Than Their Husbands Should Take Note

When wives make more than their husbands, the husbands are more likely to cheat, and the couples are more likely to face divorce. Two divorce experts weigh in on why.

www.kiplinger.com

No I can't. I apologize if my example suggested that I thought that this scenario is generally well accepted/successful. I was simply contradicting an absolute as I felt it to be more of an inflammatory statement than one which furthered a constructive argument.

 

[sloh]

No I can't. I apologize if my example suggested that I thought that this scenario is generally well accepted/successful. I was simply contradicting an absolute as I felt it to be more of an inflammatory statement than one which furthered a constructive argument.

Fair enough. I will concede there are exceptions to what the evidence suggests but it doesn’t seem to be the norm. I apologize for the absolute statement.

 

[Arcan57]

I disagree. Love is conditional.

Sure, love is conditional. I’m not arguing that. I’m arguing that people that are completely dependent on their spouse are still able/willing to blow up their relationships for all sorts of issues. I’m also trying to clarify that always making sure that your spouse “loves” you more than you love them isn’t a great protective strategy long term and if followed as an absolute will lead to some super f@$&ed up behavior.

 

[Splenda88]

Sure, love is conditional. I’m not arguing that. I’m arguing that people that are completely dependent on their spouse are still able/willing to blow up their relationships for all sorts of issues. I’m also trying to clarify that always making sure that your spouse “loves” you more than you love them isn’t a great protective strategy long term and if followed as an absolute will lead to some super f@$&ed up behavior.

That is true. But given the same circumstances, who do you think is more likely to bail out for any sort of issues? The one who is dependent on the spouse or the one whose spouse is a SAHD?

 

[emergentmd]

SAHM is hard. SAHD is almost impossible.

I know of women doc with SAHD and it is just a social nightmare. She always can pull the breadwinner card. But worse of all, SAHD doesn't fit into the SAHM social groups AND it is hard for him to fit into working dad groups.

We have a SAHD/Women Doc and it always comes up. It is exponentially harder being a SAHD.

 

[Splenda88]

SAHM is hard. SAHD is almost impossible.

I know of women doc with SAHD and it is just a social nightmare. She always can pull the breadwinner card. But worse of all, SAHD doesn't fit into the SAHM social groups AND it is hard for him to fit into working dad groups.

We have a SAHD/Women Doc and it always comes up. It is exponentially harder being a SAHD.

Why would a man sign up to be a SAHD? It goes against nature.

 

[emergentmd]

Why would a man sign up to be a SAHD? It goes against nature

I doubt any would sign up for this but if MD mom makes 500K and dad made 100K AND if they decide its better for one to stay home, then he drew the short end of the economic stick.

 

[Splenda88]

I doubt any would sign up for this but if MD mom makes 500K and dad made 100K AND if they decide its better for one to stay home, then he drew the short end of the economic stick.

I would work even in this scenario.

 

[DarkHorizon]

Marriage is hard. I am married rather happily with kids but I wouldn’t get married if I didn’t want children. My wife is pretty amazing and there’s no way I’d be to keep with what I do if she didn’t take care of day to day affairs at home and take care of our kids. She’s pretty low key, can’t imagine being married to a woman who wants extravagant lifestyle.

 

[Splenda88]

Marriage is hard. I am married rather happily with kids but I wouldn’t get married if I didn’t want children. My wife is pretty amazing and there’s no way I’d be to keep with what I do if she didn’t take care of day to day affairs at home and take care of our kids. She’s pretty low key, can’t imagine being married to a woman who wants extravagant lifestyle.

You are lucky.

The most important financial decision one makes in his/her life is marriage. You better damn be sure the person you choose won't bail out easily.

 

[Birdstrike]

I doubt any would sign up for this but if MD mom makes 500K and dad made 100K AND if they decide its better for one to stay home, then he drew the short end of the economic stick.

I have a SAHD in my family and that’s the exact scenario that lead him to it. She’s an anesthesiologist. He has 1/10th the earning potential. They decided she’d continue working and he’d handle the child care, cooking, house, etc.

It seems to be working out well enough, although he seems quite embarrassed and have low self-esteem about the role.

 

[dozitgetchahi]

There's a lot of magical thinking going on here about the realities of returning to the workforce, career trajectory, and retirement planning after staying home with the kids for several years.

How many of you would be champing at the bit to offer a job to a physician 7 years out of clinical practice? How about a nurse who hasn't touched a patient in 6 years, an accountant who hasn't dealt with the 2018 tax code, or a programmer who last committed code in 2015? Even if that person gets a job, they've given up years of promotions, raises, and just general career growth and opportunities.

There's a lot to complain about alimony--and there are some real horror stories out there (even in this thread)--but the concept of alimony for a stay-at-home parent of several years shouldn't be controversial.

It should not last for the rest of that person’s life and it should not be usurious.

I like the way Ohio does it. 3 years, that’s it, and it’s capped. Gives the other spouse time to retrain in something. People are entirely capable of retraining, and you shouldn’t get a lifelong free pass to extort a huge amount of money from someone else each month just because you were once married to them. We don’t tell people who get laid off from a dying industry to go sit on the couch for the next 20-30 years while Uncle Sugar pays their way (well, actually we do sometimes, but that’s not OK either).

In Florida, there are women in their 70s and 80s who have been getting huge monthly checks from ex husbands they divorced 40-50 years ago. Part of the reason the law was changed there was that a bunch of these men were getting to retirement age, and were getting angry that they couldn’t retire because they had to keep paying these huge amounts every month on a divorce that happened during the Carter administration. In my opinion, that is morally wrong.

 

[sloh]

Evolution doesn’t just happen below the neck. There’s a reason why flipped gender roles result in ice skating uphill. Our male ancestors who did not take on the burden of provider simply didn’t reproduce.

 

[emergentmd]

Even if the wife is supper supportive and think its manly to be a SAHD, the isolation eventually gets to you. As a SAHD, you start to lose all of your friend groups. Imagine going out with your guy friends and what do they talk about? Its sports, work, hot chicks. They surely do not talk about kids.

Its starts to feel like solitary confinement.

 

[sloh]

Even if the wife is supper supportive and think its manly to be a SAHD, the isolation eventually gets to you. As a SAHD, you start to lose all of your friend groups. Imagine going out with your guy friends and what do they talk about? Its sports, work, hot chicks. They surely do not talk about kids.

Its starts to feel like solitary confinement.

“I’d like a 911 some day.” —imagine asking your wife for permission for that lol.

“But I did the dishes, changed diapers, and took the kids to school!”

Castrated.

 

[GassYous]

“I’d like a 911 some day.” —imagine asking your wife for permission for that lol.

“But I did the dishes, changed diapers, and took the kids to school!”

Castrated.

There's a dr on reddit who is finishing training and his wife wants to buy a 170k range rover even before he's finished. No kids yet. That's even before the 1.6 million house she wants.

www.reddit.com/r/whitecoatinvestor/comments/18ff4o1/how_to_deal_with_spouse_who_has_gotten_more/

 

[Splenda88]

“I’d like a 911 some day.” —imagine asking your wife for permission for that lol.

“But I did the dishes, changed diapers, and took the kids to school!”

Castrated.

My friend ordered one that cost 160k and he told me he will likely get it in 2025.

I thought you just could go in a porch dealership and buy one.

Are they not producing enough 911?

 

[Arcan57]

My friend ordered one that cost 160k and he told me he will likely get it in 2025.

I thought you just could go in a porch dealership and buy one.

Are they not producing enough 911?

Imagine how ****ed you’d have to be to have to discuss it with your wife before buying a $160k toy.

 

[Porfirio]

My SAHM wife would have to ask me to buy a $160k toy. Just like I would have to ask her to buy a $160k toy.

I guess that’s why I will never have to worry about divorce over financial reasons.

 

[gruemd]

Imagine how ****ed you’d have to be to have to discuss it with your wife before buying a $160k toy.

lol, thank you for the perfect response. I'm all for equality and much of this thread has been, uh, alright I guess but the past couple pages are headed for real red pill territory. Married my wife in college when I barely had pre-med aspirations, she's a SAHM by choice, and sure I'd like to build my own airplane but that'll cost me 300k someday and I can't imagine telling her "Oh yeah well I earn the money so my rules."

 

[HemorrhagicShock]

lol, thank you for the perfect response. I'm all for equality and much of this thread has been, uh, alright I guess but the past couple pages are headed for real red pill territory. Married my wife in college when I barely had pre-med aspirations, she's a SAHM by choice, and sure I'd like to build my own airplane but that'll cost me 300k someday and I can't imagine telling her "Oh yeah well I earn the money so my rules."

I think you calling some of this stuff out as "red pill" is a cop-out for what is a very obvious, data-driven, and lived reality for a lot of men. Not just in the US but worldwide.

Yes, I don't want to devolve this into yet another online forum red-pill discussion, but it's never surprising that the tenets of that philosophy continue to come up naturally.

 

[sloh]

My friend ordered one that cost 160k and he told me he will likely get it in 2025.

I thought you just could go in a porch dealership and buy one.

Are they not producing enough 911?

Porsche limits allocations of 911 (especially turbo S) for all their dealerships. In fact, dealerships generally want to see a track record of the customer buying/leasing previous Porsche's before granting them an allocation. Once the customer is granted an allocation the wait for a 911 turbo S is about 1 year at least. They are awesome cars but exclusivity does drive branding and desire. Also, if dealership sees you buying and flipping the 911 turbo S it's not uncommon they will ban you from future allocations.