MCW Class of 2010, Part 3

[Ashers]

So some Yale grad submitted his resume and this video to a wall street firm. Now he's suing the firm for letting it get online. Apparently the firm thought it was funny... I wonder why, "Ignore the losers."

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[45408]

55 pages, and now you guys are running out of steam? Weak.

 

[Xandie]

That's my bestest friend Crystal... and no, I'm not giving out her number.

 

[indo]

That's my bestest friend Crystal... and no, I'm not giving out her number.

Who actually calls people nowadays? I've seen people exchange myspace addresses instead of phone numbers in bars. What the hell?

 

[indo]

55 pages, and now you guys are running out of steam? Weak.

They're not out of steam, they're out of serotonin. I saw a bunch of 2nd years running bucked nekkid through the streets just touching and hugging various objects. They were each carrying 10 gallons of water and were sweating profusely. I called the police and they asked "are they white kids?" I said yes and they told me to call back later.

 

[indo]

by the way, nekkid med students = not that good.

 

[indo]

So some Yale grad submitted his resume and this video to a wall street firm. Now he's suing the firm for letting it get online. Apparently the firm thought it was funny... I wonder why, "Ignore the losers."

I got to 40 seconds and I already hate that guy. So, this video tells me that they teach everything but social skills at Yale.

 

[Ashers]

I got to 40 seconds and I already hate that guy. So, this video tells me that they teach everything but social skills at Yale.

Fox news said he'd make the perfect investment banker because he's so egotistical and full of himself.

 

[45408]

by the way, nekkid med students = not that good.

hmmm, my wife doesn't seem to think it's too horrible.

 

[45408]

So some Yale grad submitted his resume and this video to a wall street firm. Now he's suing the firm for letting it get online. Apparently the firm thought it was funny... I wonder why, "Ignore the losers."

I heard about this when it came out, but I never watched it, nor can I bear to see much more than his little intro about success. NO ONE deserves an 11 page resume. Is he out of his mind? You could have three purple hearts, a Rhodes scholarship, an issue of Science and Nature dedicated to you, be Time magazine's Man of the Year, and you still don't need more than a page and a half or two, max. What did he include?

Age 2: Acquired the requisite hand-eye coordination responsible for cleaning my anal region with a composite material made largely of wood pulp.

......

Age 22: Achieved the status of world-renowned pompous douche bag.

 

[indo]

hmmm, my wife doesn't seem to think it's too horrible.

You're the exception that proves the rule. What the hell does that mean anyway?

 

[45408]

You're the exception that proves the rule. What the hell does that mean anyway?

Um, only if the rule says that there's always exceptions, I don't see how the exception would prove the rule.

 

[asunshine]

another question: did any of you think biochem in undergrad helped for med school?

i might take it next semester, but i can't seem to justify the time, money and gas mileage required...

 

[Agent Splat]

another question: did any of you think biochem in undergrad helped for med school?

i might take it next semester, but i can't seem to justify the time, money and gas mileage required...

it helped me, but mostly because it just gave me a glimpse of what I was in for and forced me to start memorizing tons of useless crap that will be useless after the final exam. Plus a lot of the weird enzyme names and such weren't so foreign. So i guess if anything it got me in the right mindset and was just a nice preview of what was to come. If it's not a huge deal to take it, I would. But don't feel you'll be screwed without it. I know plenty of people that didn't have it that are still with us today.

 

[Agent Splat]

great news!! I removed the one-way valve!!!!

 

[Xandie]

great news!! I removed the one-way valve!!!!

That sounds naughty... *giggle*

 

[45408]

another question: did any of you think biochem in undergrad helped for med school?

i might take it next semester, but i can't seem to justify the time, money and gas mileage required...

If it's a huge hassle, don't bother, but yes, I think it helped a pretty decent amount.

 

[Gimlet]

another question: did any of you think biochem in undergrad helped for med school?

i might take it next semester, but i can't seem to justify the time, money and gas mileage required...

I'm gonna go ahead and say DON'T. I didn't have a lick of biochem coming in and I did fine. Aside from biochemistry majors, people who took biochem in undergrad have to study just as hard to do well in biochem as people who haven't had any. Don't make yourself miserable for your last few months before signing your life away to med school.

If you're looking to take something that will help you in med school, my advice is to take a fun class that will get you started on a hobby that you can use to distract yourself from medschool stuff when you get the chance. Like golf or yoga or dance or something. Hell, if snake charming will help you cope with life in med school, go for it.

 

[indo]

That's my bestest friend Crystal... and no, I'm not giving out her number.

Is she a stripper? Cuz, Crystal is a stripper's stage name and she has her busoms on the innernets. Also, tell her I say wussup and that I'm going to be a doctor.

 

[asunshine]

I'm gonna go ahead and say DON'T. I didn't have a lick of biochem coming in and I did fine. Aside from biochemistry majors, people who took biochem in undergrad have to study just as hard to do well in biochem as people who haven't had any. Don't make yourself miserable for your last few months before signing your life away to med school.

If you're looking to take something that will help you in med school, my advice is to take a fun class that will get you started on a hobby that you can use to distract yourself from medschool stuff when you get the chance. Like golf or yoga or dance or something. Hell, if snake charming will help you cope with life in med school, go for it.

Thanks for the responses. I bought a review book; I might just work through that a little. It's a 30-min commute to the nearest college otherwise.

You mean SDN isn't a hobby?

 

[Gimlet]

Thanks for the responses. I bought a review book; I might just work through that a little. It's a 30-min commute to the nearest college otherwise.

You mean SDN isn't a hobby?

Oh, they don't have SDN 401: Advanced Pre-med Forum Trolling at your college? That's the most useful class you'll ever take!

ps: Put the book in a desk and fugheddaboudit until school starts. Trust me, you will thank me when you get here. The biochem professors recommend that you study over the summer, and it's the hugest load of BS they will feed you (besides "don't worry about the details, just understand the general concept.")

 

[Agent Splat]

Oh, they don't have SDN 401: Advanced Pre-med Forum Trolling at your college? That's the most useful class you'll ever take!

ps: Put the book in a desk and fugheddaboudit until school starts. Trust me, you will thank me when you get here. The biochem professors recommend that you study over the summer, and it's the hugest load of BS they will feed you (besides "don't worry about the details, just understand the general concept.")

no, you need to open that book right away and follow these instructions: http://page394.ytmnd.com/

 

[45408]

Oh, they don't have SDN 401: Advanced Pre-med Forum Trolling at your college? That's the most useful class you'll ever take!

ps: Put the book in a desk and fugheddaboudit until school starts. Trust me, you will thank me when you get here. The biochem professors recommend that you study over the summer, and it's the hugest load of BS they will feed you (besides "don't worry about the details, just understand the general concept.")

I rofled when I saw that handout, and just stuck it back in the orientation packet.

 

[DoctorFunk]

Why the long faces, kiddies? T'ain't no tests a-happenin, and the snow isn't a-flyin' just yet. For you cheeseheads out there, the Packers even won.

It's a celebration, b!tches! Enjoy yourselves!

 

[asunshine]

Yeah, that sounded pretty gunnerish of me, didn't it.

On to another question: how good and how often are the free lunches? I want answers.

 

[Ashers]

Yeah, that sounded pretty gunnerish of me, didn't it.

On to another question: how good and how often are the free lunches? I want answers.

First 2 weeks they happen every day, and they're generally pizza or subs. Then at least once a week throughout the year you can get free pizza. Subs are more expensive, so they're harder to come by. I haven't gotten tired of subs yet -- pizza though, I'm pretty tired of it. A lot of the lunches are limited to the organizations' members.

 

[Gimlet]

Yeah, that sounded pretty gunnerish of me, didn't it.

On to another question: how good and how often are the free lunches? I want answers.

How good: Not very good. You will loathe Little Ceasar's pizza after the first week. Once in a while you score some nice Chinese or Mexican food.

How often: Very often...you can go the whole first month of school without ever having to pay for lunch, and probably the rest of the year you'll only have to bring lunch once or twice a week if you really want to be a lunch *****. I got sick of them after a couple weeks, and now I only go if the topic REALLY interests me.

Just make sure you don't dine and dash! It sucks when people do that.

 

[Gimlet]

First 2 weeks they happen every day, and they're generally pizza or subs. Then at least once a week throughout the year you can get free pizza. Subs are more expensive, so they're harder to come by. I haven't gotten tired of subs yet -- pizza though, I'm pretty tired of it. A lot of the lunches are limited to the organizations' members.

I'm tired of those tiny, soggy, crappy Subway subs with no toppings or condiments on them. Someone brought in Jimmy John's once last year, and that was awesome.

Technically, if a group is using Student Assembly money for their lunch it HAS to be open to everyone, not just members. I'm not sure how some groups get away with it, but I guess if they collect dues they might be paying for the lunches themselves.

 

[Ashers]

I'm tired of those tiny, soggy, crappy Subway subs with no toppings or condiments on them. Someone brought in Jimmy John's once last year, and that was awesome.

Technically, if a group is using Student Assembly money for their lunch it HAS to be open to everyone, not just members. I'm not sure how some groups get away with it, but I guess if they collect dues they might be paying for the lunches themselves.

Oh ok. Maybe I'm just hallucinating, or dreamed it. subs are still better than pizza, but yeah, I only go to lunches that sound interesting to me. APAMSA (Asian Pacific American Medical Student Association) are usually good because they have Chinese food. They also have leftovers I get to help my friends eat.

 

[DoctorFunk]

Yeah, that sounded pretty gunnerish of me, didn't it.

On to another question: how good and how often are the free lunches? I want answers.

Andy already mentioned the monotony that is the Little Caesar's pizza lunches. I feel it is my duty then to warn you of the dangers of Papa John's pizza, which will be prominently featured at many a free lunch next year as well.

Beware Papa John's pizza. The corrosive nature of the pizza sauce will undoubtedly cause great harm not only to the mucous lining of your stomach, but also your poor gingiva. Eat more than two pieces and you will feel like you swallowed flaming razor blades that unleashed pure hydrochloric acid into your stomach upon digestion.

But those first two pieces are pretty good.

 

[Ashers]

Andy already mentioned the monotony that is the Little Caesar's pizza lunches. I feel it is my duty then to warn you of the dangers of Papa John's pizza, which will be prominently featured at many a free lunch next year as well.

Beware Papa John's pizza. The corrosive nature of the pizza sauce will undoubtedly cause great harm not only to the mucous lining of your stomach, but also your poor gingiva. Eat more than two pieces and you will feel like you swallowed flaming razor blades that unleashed pure hydrochloric acid into your stomach upon digestion.

But those first two pieces are pretty good.

You're forgetting if you're lucky (or unlucky) enough to get one of the garlic butter packages like I was yesterday at the Surgery lunch. That'll just leave you sick if you manage to eat 2 pieces of pizza with the crusts dipped in the garlic butter.

 

[DoctorFunk]

You're forgetting if you're lucky (or unlucky) enough to get one of the garlic butter packages like I was yesterday at the Surgery lunch. That'll just leave you sick if you manage to eat 2 pieces of pizza with the crusts dipped in the garlic butter.

Ugh. So many horrid memories of those garlic butter packages from undergrad. I swear, Papa John's singlehandedly ruined several finals for me due to their late-night delivery and GI-unfriendly hijinks.

Excuse me, I feel like I need to go eat a quart of white rice and drink a liter of water for my past Papa John's sins.

 

[Ashers]

Ugh. So many horrid memories of those garlic butter packages from undergrad. I swear, Papa John's singlehandedly ruined several finals for me due to their late-night delivery and GI-unfriendly hijinks.

Excuse me, I feel like I need to go eat a quart of white rice and drink a liter of water for my past Papa John's sins.

You are a ninja... Ninjas are Japanese... Japanese eat sticky white rice... you are absolved for you Papa John's sins.

 

[Agent Splat]

what the hell? I've never had a problem with Papa John's, and especially not the garlic butter. That's the best stuff EVER.

 

[DoctorFunk]

what the hell? I've never had a problem with Papa John's, and especially not the garlic butter. That's the best stuff EVER.

Then you are clearly a ghost trapped on the Earth in spirit form with no idea that he doesn't have a real earthly body.

I guess you could be an android too.

 

[45408]

what the hell? I've never had a problem with Papa John's, and especially not the garlic butter. That's the best stuff EVER.

you and me both. I think it's good stuff. Obviously, we've got GI tracts of Teflon.

 

[DoctorFunk]

Time to board the good ship HMS MCW Succubus for another Touchy Feely Tuesday.

 

[Ashers]

Curse Papa Johns and their delicious garlic butter sauce and Kaplan and Qreview and spending money.

 

[asunshine]

you can go the whole first month of school without ever having to pay for lunch,

sweet

Beware Papa John's pizza. The corrosive nature of the pizza sauce will undoubtedly cause great harm not only to the mucous lining of your stomach, but also your poor gingiva. Eat more than two pieces and you will feel like you swallowed flaming razor blades that unleashed pure hydrochloric acid into your stomach upon digestion.

But those first two pieces are pretty good.

 

[DoctorFunk]

That was rough! By the way, I take all of the negative statements I made about Papa John's this morning back. Compared to the Kaplan presentation today about Step 1 study materials and the random questions they presented to try to frighten us all back into the womb, I've decided that the free Papa John's pizza they provided was more than palatable.

 

[Agent Splat]

That was rough! By the way, I take all of the negative statements I made about Papa John's this morning back. Compared to the Kaplan presentation today about Step 1 study materials and the random questions they presented to try to frighten us all back into the womb, I've decided that the free Papa John's pizza they provided was more than palatable.

still don't understand why everyone's freaking out about boards. It's not even required. i know a guy that landed a top surgical residency in the southern province of Kumbooba and he never took it.

 

[DoctorFunk]

still don't understand why everyone's freaking out about boards. It's not even required. i know a guy that landed a top surgical residency in the southern province of Kumbooba and he never took it.

Yeah, but I heard they require a SAT score of 750(!) to get the coveted derm residency in the southern province of Kumbooba. I never took the SAT, and doubt I could attain such a high score, so I'm hoping I can compensate by passing the Step 1 exam. Cross your fingers for me guys!

 

[Agent Splat]

Yeah, but I heard they require a SAT score of 750(!) to get the coveted derm residency in the southern province of Kumbooba. I never took the SAT, and doubt I could attain such a high score, so I'm hoping I can compensate by passing the Step 1 exam. Cross your fingers for me guys!

apparently you can also get in with a good letter of recommendation from one of the local warlords.

 

[Ashers]

Yeah, but I heard they require a SAT score of 750(!) to get the coveted derm residency in the southern province of Kumbooba. I never took the SAT, and doubt I could attain such a high score, so I'm hoping I can compensate by passing the Step 1 exam. Cross your fingers for me guys!

Is that a 750 with the new writing sample since the SATs have been changed? Or is that just verbal and math? Would it have to be increased to a 900 with the writing if it's not included? What if I took the old SATs, will they still count? SATIIs? Oh man, how am I ever going to do this? What are my chances, guys?

 

[DoctorFunk]

What are my chances, guys?

Come in. Please, sit down. I'm afraid I have some bad news for you.

*sigh*

There's no easy way to say this. Your chances are -3%. I'm so sorry.

 

[Ashers]

Come in. Please, sit down. I'm afraid I have some bad news for you.

*sigh*

There's no easy way to say this. Your chances are -3%. I'm so sorry.

:'( I can't believe this is happening to me!

So now I'm just wasting my time studying virology. I knew I should've gone for the PhD in immunology.

 

[samenewme]

I have now seen the Prowler's wife. Apparently she is real, and also totally gorgeous, which begs the question of why he was asking for links to a MySpace profile of cleavage.

...or maybe she's NOT real and I've just been studying too long and imagined her. She does seem to be gone now.

 

[indo]

Is prowler in the library now?

 

[DoctorFunk]

I have now seen the Prowler's wife. Apparently she is real, and also totally gorgeous, which begs the question of why he was asking for links to a MySpace profile of cleavage.

...or maybe she's NOT real and I've just been studying too long and imagined her. She does seem to be gone now.

Oops...actually that was me in my Halloween costume. Sorry for the confusion, and for the hauntingly short glimpse you got of my very long, very gorgeous legs.

 

[DoctorFunk]

:'( I can't believe this is happening to me!

So now I'm just wasting my time studying virology. I knew I should've gone for the PhD in immunology.

Look at it this way. You could always finish off the MD, skip the boards and residency, and spend the rest of your career writing poetry and short stories about the doctor-patient relationship that you never really experienced. Then you could take the show on the road and lecture at all of the Ivy League med schools.