2014-2015 APPIC (internship) interview thread

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Thanks!!! It helped. Got an interview today, so nicely worded too. 🙂 I'll be sending positive vibes your way.

Interview: MEDVAMC - Houston VA - Michael E. DeBakey
Method: Mass email
Dates: January 5, 9, 12, 16, 2015 (either morning or afternoon session)
Track: General
Out of curiosity, did the e-mail indicate it was for the general track applicants?

If so, has anyone heard anything re: neuro track?
 
Question for all you Yankees from this Southern girl...I'm actually quite stoked about the probability of moving far North for internship, but having never lived there, I have an interview conundrum for which I would like to plan ahead...massive snow and interview footwear. Do I just bring a big bag, wear in sneakers or boots and change into my dress shoes inside? What's the protocol?!? :penguin: Also (stupid question) people don't use an umbrella in the snow right? Just a hooded coat?
 
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Question for all you Yankees from this Southern girl...I'm actually quite stoked about the probability of moving far North for internship, but having never lived there, I have an interview conundrum for which I would like to plan ahead...massive snow and interview footwear. Do I just bring a big bag, wear in sneakers or boots and change into my dress shoes inside? What's the protocol?!? :penguin:

I would also love to know the protocol!
 
Question for all you Yankees from this Southern girl...I'm actually quite stoked about the probability of moving far North for internship, but having never lived there, I have an interview conundrum for which I would like to plan ahead...massive snow and interview footwear. Do I just bring a big bag, wear in sneakers or boots and change into my dress shoes inside? What's the protocol?!? :penguin: Also (stupid question) people don't use an umbrella in the snow right? Just a hooded coat?
Hahaha, this is an awesome question cause I was concerned with the same thing. I've lived in both Colorado and on the East Coast so I'm familiar with the perils of snow and dress wear. What I will do (and was seconded by my professor) is to wear snow boots and bring a bag with my dress shoes. People will be bringing bags and suitcases if they're taking a flight out later so I'm sure the sites will have places for us to store stuff. I can leave my boots with that stuff and my coat (invest in a warm coat! and good SNOW boots!) and switch out later. I used to do that at practicum when it snowed in Denver.
 
Hahaha, this is an awesome question cause I was concerned with the same thing. I've lived in both Colorado and on the East Coast so I'm familiar with the perils of snow and dress wear. What I will do (and was seconded by my professor) is to wear snow boots and bring a bag with my dress shoes. People will be bringing bags and suitcases if they're taking a flight out later so I'm sure the sites will have places for us to store stuff. I can leave my boots with that stuff and my coat (invest in a warm coat! and good SNOW boots!) and switch out later. I used to do that at practicum when it snowed in Denver.
Ok--amazing advice...Can you give some pointers as to what "good SNOW boots" are by brand, etc? I'm seriously stoked about living in the snow, I love colder climates, but I've never stayed in one long enough to buy snow boots 😵
 
Ok--amazing advice...Can you give some pointers as to what "good SNOW boots" are by brand, etc? I'm seriously stoked about living in the snow, I love colder climates, but I've never stayed in one long enough to buy snow boots 😵

And what constitutes a good coat?? 😀
 
And what constitutes a good coat?? 😀
Reply to both boots and coat:

Go to REI or some other sporting/camping store and spend a little extra on a good coat. I capitalized snow boots because anything that's sold in department stores or for fashion reasons is not a good idea. I've found 2 good pairs through Amazon, and I got a Patagonia coat or something like that from REI. The coat issue isn't as much of a big deal as the boots. You'll regret wearing the wrong boots in the snow. It might be a little overkill to buy this stuff just for a couple interviews, but you might live in these places in the future. And you can always use the boots during rainy weather in general.
 
Ladies, I received this tip last year and it was a life saver for me! If you have a large enough purse/bag, bring a pair of flats if you are wearing heals. Many times you will be taken on a tour of the site and/or walking far distances to meet with those who are interviewing you. Although my heels were pretty comfortable, I was not a happy camper at the end of the day (especially after walking up and down countless flights of stairs). As soon as my interview was over, I would duck into a bathroom and change into flats.

Oh, and don't forget an umbrella!
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉
 
Hi All - it seems like there are quite a few folks on here with kids. Out of curiosity, will you be mentioning that you have a child during interviews? If so, are you male or female? Most of my mentors/supervisors advised me to refrain from talking about my daughter. Is this the same feedback you've received?
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉
Based on conversations with friends/peers and my own status, you are not alone in that it is not the case that everyone's problems revolve around having too many flights to catch. Hang in there. :luck:
 
Not sure if this was posted yet (I saw someone posted the invite):

Site: Montefiore Medical Center
Date notified: 12/3/14 620PMEST
Decision: Rejection
Mass (stock) e-mail
Track: Adult (I applied to adult, but email was non-specific)
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉


If you still have that many sites to hear from, I would not stress too much. If it is any comfort you, I know a student who only had one interview last year and matched.
 
The TD of The Help Group (in Los Angeles) sent out a really sweet email about an hour ago just letting all applicants know that they are still reading applications, that they'll notify everyone on the same day, and that they will notify everyone by their deadline of 12/15. She also added, "We know how tough this process is for all of you, and we really appreciate your understanding and patience." While it wasn't an invitation (or a rejection!), it was still really nice to read 🙂
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉

I can completely relate to what you're saying. I have zero invites but haven't heard back from most of my sites. I'm trying to stay positive, and hope you do too. Being in this position does make me wonder if I too overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant.
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉
I'm definitely in the same boat as you. I have 6 rejections and 1 interview. Unfortunately, that interview is a site that I'm not super excited about (I applied there due to geographical reasons). I also thought that I would be very competitive. Six sites left to go and it's not looking very promising. 🙁
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉

Wow, reading your words makes me feel less alone in this. I too am fearing that I overestimated my competitiveness, and I am trying my best to stay hopeful about the 14 sites I haven't heard from. I think of the song from Rent, I know this is corny, "will I lose my dignity, will someone care?"
I still want to believe this will all work out, but am actively making peace with needing to take an extra year. Everyone around me constantly says "your being silly of course you'll get a great internship", but I am finding no comfort in their words. I just want to know where I stand...
 
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Hi All - it seems like there are quite a few folks on here with kids. Out of curiosity, will you be mentioning that you have a child during interviews? If so, are you male or female? Most of my mentors/supervisors advised me to refrain from talking about my daughter. Is this the same feedback you've received?
HI Clinical Gal:
Thanks so much for asking this question-such a hard one. I've gotten mostly the same advice as you and am going to go into it with the intention of not volunteering too much info about my motherhood role. Which is hilarious because it is most definitely my main role currently (my daughter is 18 months). However, I think it will feel a little off to me if I get specific questions about what I do on my off time and I don't mention her, since its not like I'm engaging in lots of recreational activities besides doing a local playground slide tour. Also, I kind of have another agenda of normalizing talking about parenthood during graduate school, but I doubt I'll have the courage to bring that up in an intense interview if I think it might be seen as a negative (which, very unfortunately, I think it sometimes is). So, I'll probably reference her if I get specific personal questions, but won't volunteer the info.

(I actually started commenting here again after a 4 year hiatus because I saw your post about interview attire, so awesome to see other mommas (and daddas) doing this too. I won't be wearing a traditional suit- still shopping for the right attire).
 
Question for all you Yankees from this Southern girl...I'm actually quite stoked about the probability of moving far North for internship, but having never lived there, I have an interview conundrum for which I would like to plan ahead...massive snow and interview footwear. Do I just bring a big bag, wear in sneakers or boots and change into my dress shoes inside? What's the protocol?!? :penguin: Also (stupid question) people don't use an umbrella in the snow right? Just a hooded coat?

You have two options: wear winter boots and change shoes indoors, or just wear dressy boots. I wore dressy booties that I already owned (since I attended grad school in a very cold climate). Also, I second the suggestion that you wear no heels or heels that you know will be comfortable.
 
If you still have that many sites to hear from, I would not stress too much. If it is any comfort you, I know a student who only had one interview last year and matched.

I also have a friend who had only one interview and matched to that site. It does happen. Just put forth your best effort at every stage of the process.
 
Wow, reading your words makes me feel less alone in this. I too am fearing that I overestimated my competitiveness, and I am trying my best to stay hopeful about the 14 sites I haven't heard from. I think of the song from Rent, I know this is corny, "will I lose my dignity, will someone care?"
I still want to believe this will all work out, but am actively making peace with needing to take an extra year. Everyone around me constantly says "your being silly of course you'll get a great internship", but I am finding no comfort in their words. I just want to know where I stand...

Haha love Rent. Just yesterday I was dancing around my kitchen blasting "Hold On" by Wilson Phillips. I highly recommend it. :nod:
 
Hahaha, this is an awesome question cause I was concerned with the same thing. I've lived in both Colorado and on the East Coast so I'm familiar with the perils of snow and dress wear. What I will do (and was seconded by my professor) is to wear snow boots and bring a bag with my dress shoes. People will be bringing bags and suitcases if they're taking a flight out later so I'm sure the sites will have places for us to store stuff. I can leave my boots with that stuff and my coat (invest in a warm coat! and good SNOW boots!) and switch out later. I used to do that at practicum when it snowed in Denver.
Thanks for the advice! I am clueless when it comes to handling snowy (or even very cold) weather. I am going to borrow snow boots from a friend, fortunately, and I just bought a nice (very cute but professional? 🙂 ) coat. And my boyfriend definitely made fun of me the one time it snowed when I lived in NOLA, and I asked if I could use an umbrella... (I'm still unclear as to why this isn't done, actually - if you have snow on you, then you go inside, it melts, and then you're all wet! No?? 🤔)
 
Hi All - it seems like there are quite a few folks on here with kids. Out of curiosity, will you be mentioning that you have a child during interviews? If so, are you male or female? Most of my mentors/supervisors advised me to refrain from talking about my daughter. Is this the same feedback you've received?

I am a father, and I plan to talk about my child during interviews...I even wrote about my child in my essays (and so far I have three interviews 🙂). To me this is a large part of my identity, so to not talk about it seems strange. But I could see how some sites may not be open to this...but if that's the case, I probably wouldn't want to be at that site. Also, being a male may give me some privileges on this topic that females may not have. I guess you just have to assess the vibe you get from a specific site and whether or not its a safe thing to bring up. Advice from my supervisors/mentors was to definitely talk about this aspect of my identity throughout applications/interviews.
 
Hi All - it seems like there are quite a few folks on here with kids. Out of curiosity, will you be mentioning that you have a child during interviews? If so, are you male or female? Most of my mentors/supervisors advised me to refrain from talking about my daughter. Is this the same feedback you've received?

Answering from a place of privilege here: I'm male and have a 3 year old boy, another on the way, and a recently PhD'd spouse. I mentioned being a spouse and father in my essays, and one of my recommenders (oddly) did as well. I'm going to be open about my child, but I'm not going to mention the one on the way. I worry that some sites may look askance at someone in the first-year newborn haze. At the same time, I'm going to take into account "family friendliness" like flexible or customizable hours when I rank sites. I understand that there is more pressure on women in this situation because its seems gatekeepers assume you just CAN'T WAIT to start the position and take maternity leave... It's a weird nation we live in.
 
Hi SNDers, looking for some support because I am feeling alone out here. Things have gotten off to a horrible start for me. So far, I have 5 rejections and NO invites. Others have also heard back from several sites I applied to that I haven't heard anything from...which I think probably means rejections from there too. I still have 15 sites that I haven't heard from yet in total (including the handful that seem they are likely rejections), so I know this isn't the end of the line, but I feel desperately afraid that I way underestimated this process and way overestimated my competitiveness as an applicant. Just wondering if there is anyone is in the same boat as me, or if most people's problems revolve around having too may flights to catch. 😉

until 9:46am this morning, i was feeling like you. I had 4 rejections officially but i had written off 6 of the 9 sites i had left. I had been second guessing myself ;i still am.Several sdners reached out to tell me that it is still early in the game but it is really hard accepting that things are out of our hands at this point. I'll tell you what i did that helped me to calm down. I started making plans for what i could do to strengthen my application next year. This is what worked for me because i can't deal with uncertainty and it gave me a healthy way to cope(in my mind).

Now i don't know your situation;you may not want to start thinking about your plan right now or you may not have luxury of having the opportunity to try again next year but my whole point is that; at this point things are out of our hands so try and find a healthy coping mechanism while you wait.

I am at this point attempting to hope for the best and plan for the worst.Hang in there
 
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Wow, reading your words makes me feel less alone in this. I too am fearing that I overestimated my competitiveness, and I am trying my best to stay hopeful about the 14 sites I haven't heard from. I think of the song from Rent, I know this is corny, "will I lose my dignity, will someone care?"
I still want to believe this will all work out, but am actively making peace with needing to take an extra year. Everyone around me constantly says "your being silly of course you'll get a great internship", but I am finding no comfort in their words. I just want to know where I stand...


To the people who tell you that you are being silly and of course you will get a great internship - they should know that sentiments like that, though well-intentioned, are not helpful. It's the same as someone who goes through anything difficult in life, and people say "don't worry, everything will turn out okay." The truth of the matter is, a LOT of well-qualified applicants will not get internships this year, sadly. It could be any of us - even someone who has 11 interviews. Sometimes, things happen in life that are simply not okay. As a society, people have difficulty confronting that. They want to sweep the difficult human emotions under the rug, getting them out of sight. They are still there, but are ignored. This is not healthy.

But you're right - it is good to have a community like this to see that you/we are not alone. We can put the circumstances and their associated emotions out there, talk about them, and see that there is a lot of ambiguity and disappointment floating around at the moment. A lack of responses is extremely difficult, because you can't plan anything. You don't know if you can start thinking about moving somewhere to start a new thing, or figure out what to do with your year until it's time to apply again. But none of us will really know that until February. Regardless of what each of us has heard or not heard, it's good to work on preparing for interviews and do all that we can do, by putting forth our best efforts at each stage of this process.
 
Wow, reading your words makes me feel less alone in this. I too am fearing that I overestimated my competitiveness, and I am trying my best to stay hopeful about the 14 sites I haven't heard from. I think of the song from Rent, I know this is corny, "will I lose my dignity, will someone care?"
I still want to believe this will all work out, but am actively making peace with needing to take an extra year. Everyone around me constantly says "your being silly of course you'll get a great internship", but I am finding no comfort in their words. I just want to know where I stand...

Will you wake tomorrow from this nightmaaare?

Anyway, I had a lot of rejections because I applied to about 20 sites and got 7 interviews. So I remember that feeling. But you have a lot of sites left to hear from! If you end up with no interviews and all rejections, then you can start to panic.
 
Question for all you Yankees from this Southern girl...I'm actually quite stoked about the probability of moving far North for internship, but having never lived there, I have an interview conundrum for which I would like to plan ahead...massive snow and interview footwear. Do I just bring a big bag, wear in sneakers or boots and change into my dress shoes inside? What's the protocol?!? :penguin: Also (stupid question) people don't use an umbrella in the snow right? Just a hooded coat?

Also, just since I don't think anyone covered this yet - no, you don't use an umbrella in the snow. 🙂
 
HI Clinical Gal:
Thanks so much for asking this question-such a hard one. I've gotten mostly the same advice as you and am going to go into it with the intention of not volunteering too much info about my motherhood role. Which is hilarious because it is most definitely my main role currently (my daughter is 18 months). However, I think it will feel a little off to me if I get specific questions about what I do on my off time and I don't mention her, since its not like I'm engaging in lots of recreational activities besides doing a local playground slide tour. Also, I kind of have another agenda of normalizing talking about parenthood during graduate school, but I doubt I'll have the courage to bring that up in an intense interview if I think it might be seen as a negative (which, very unfortunately, I think it sometimes is). So, I'll probably reference her if I get specific personal questions, but won't volunteer the info.

(I actually started commenting here again after a 4 year hiatus because I saw your post about interview attire, so awesome to see other mommas (and daddas) doing this too. I won't be wearing a traditional suit- still shopping for the right attire).

I'd be wary of any site where you wouldn't feel comfortable disclosing you are a parent; it is (or will be) an integrated part of your life as a psychologist and you want to know, beginning with the interview, that this is a family-friendly site. Do you want to work for a year in a place where your peers and supervisors will be disapproving or suspicious of parenthood? Experience with parenthood can actually be a strength and it is good to think ahead about questions you might find challenging as well as ways to bring up the fact that you are a parent.
Obviously some sites may have realistic concerns if they have varying hours, on call, etc: just be able to explain how you would handle those demands. Trying to hide the fact would be stressful and just be weird if the site had reason to know about it already. For example, I have seen reference letters that speak admiring of how a student has managed pregnancy/birth/parenthood through graduate school. So if you respond to the "Tell us something about you that is not in your c.v." kind of question without referencing such a major life role, that could definitely seem off.
 
Thank you so much CApsych, CounsPsychPhD2b, and Bag of Owls. Your posts are so validating to my experience. Thank you for helping me think through what and how much to disclose. CApsych - yes yes yes! I echo each and every one of your sentiments. I want to be brave enough to mention my baby because she is SUCH a huge part of my identity at this point. While I know that she has made me a far more effective clinician (e.g. more patient, a better time manager, more compassionate), clinical psychology can still be a pretty old fashioned field.

Dads that commented: I very much appreciate you recognizing your male privilege in this conversation. Thank you for your perspective and willingness to discuss this topic, too. I agree that 'family friendliness' will be a factor when ranking sites, but I want to be the one to make the decision to rank a site low and not them make that decision about me just because they know I have a baby, which makes the decision to disclose a difficult one.
 
Out of curiosity, did the e-mail indicate it was for the general track applicants?

If so, has anyone heard anything re: neuro track?

It was directed to "Dear Internship Applicant" and forwarded from the director of training by the admin clerk for scheduling. Not sure if that helps. Just keep in mind, that no news is good news. I heard nothing yesterday, and 3 rejections on Monday. Wishing you some luck for tomorrow. :luck:
 
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I would probably hold off on asking for feedback until the Match is over. Sites are SUPER busy right now. I also wouldn't reply to rejections, I think sites are assuming that you received it so no need to confirm.

If we are replying to ask for feedback because we have future interest, would sites still have our application materials after the match so that they could look and see why they didn't offer an interview?
 
Thank you so much CApsych, CounsPsychPhD2b, and Bag of Owls. Your posts are so validating to my experience. Thank you for helping me think through what and how much to disclose. CApsych - yes yes yes! I echo each and every one of your sentiments. I want to be brave enough to mention my baby because she is SUCH a huge part of my identity at this point. While I know that she has made me a far more effective clinician (e.g. more patient, a better time manager, more compassionate), clinical psychology can still be a pretty old fashioned field.

Dads that commented: I very much appreciate you recognizing your male privilege in this conversation. Thank you for your perspective and willingness to discuss this topic, too. I agree that 'family friendliness' will be a factor when ranking sites, but I want to be the one to make the decision to rank a site low and not them make that decision about me just because they know I have a baby, which makes the decision to disclose a difficult one.
Thanks so much for starting this conversation! And just to clarify in response to some of the other posters, I don't have any intention of trying to hide the fact that I have a child during internship (walking into work with yogurt massaged into my hair usually tips people off) but I'd rather people not have this information potentially affect their assessment of me during the interview process. Of course it shouldn't, but I also feel that the field can be old fashioned at times, like when I interviewed 9 months pregnant and some of the interviewers blushed when I mentioned my pregnancy.
 
I attended a webinar hosted by the APLS Student Committee (related to the APA) and Dr. Jay Singh answered questions about discussing pregnancy, potential future pregnancy, and already existing children on internship interviews. The webinar hosts sent me a text file with a transcript of the webinar and I've included a portion of it below:

Casey LaDuke: Okay. And Jay, I know that you are aware that this post-doc is several
years. Are you planning on starting a family?
Dr. Jay Singh: Family is incredibly important to me, there's no question about that.
What I would say is that I have no immediate plans, when it comes to
having a family. It's something where at some point in the future, I
would actually love to be a father. It's always been a lifelong dream of
mine. When I'm lucky enough to be blessed with a child, then I suppose
I'll confront that when it comes to it, but it's certainly something where
what I do know is that my passion for this job, my passion for this field,
and my dream, which has now been realized, completing graduate
school, and being able to begin this journey. And of every place I could
be, this is the place that I want to be, and I would be dedicated and loyal
to this position.
Casey LaDuke: And I know this isn't obviously going to apply directly to you, but if that
same question were posed to you as it will be most likely as to a woman,
how would you think that the best way to respond to be?
Dr. Jay Singh: Sure. I think the key thing -- It's always best with some of these
questions, on a superficial level, they seem inappropriate, that they just
shouldn't be asked. Like Casey said, it may be asked. Usually, it's not
asked in an official interview capacity, it'll be asked at dinner that night.
It'll be asked by the wife of one of the faculty members. This is what I
hear most often. The key thing is to get underneath that initial question,
and figure out what are they really asking?
So, if I am a woman, and they ask me am I planning on starting a family in
the next few years, what they're asking is, are we going to lose you? Are
we going to have gone through this process to gain someone as amazing
as you, and then all of a sudden you're gone, and you're just not coming
back? And the key thing to do is to be able to reassure them that that
won't be the case. Now, I promise you. I remember my mother, for
example. She was a nurse in the army, down at Walter Reed National
Medical Center in Washington, D.C. And I remember that she had my
sister and kept working, and then she had me, and she stopped working.
And she's never regretted it once, she absolutely loves it. She's a
volunteer firefighter, and she does tai chi like three times a week. We
have more weapons in our house than we know what to do with, for
some reason, we've got like ten bo staffs, I don't know. But the thing is,
this was never part of her plan. However, this ended up happening. And
I know many men who, they're stay at home dads. It happens the same
way. Maybe not as often, but it does certainly happen.
So the key thing is to assure them of using words like loyalty is very
strong, and being dedicated. These are very good words to be able to
use in this kind of a response. Let's say that you're planning on having
kiddos in the next year. There's no problem with that. Is it something to
be incredibly open about and saying, actually no, we're trying right now,
and hopefully within the next few months we'll find out something. I
honestly would not say that. I would say something vague, like I said,
which is family is very important to me. No one will ever fault you for
that. Family is very important to me, and the way that I feel about it, is
that when I am blessed with a kiddo then I'm going to be a very lucky
man.
I have no plans in the immediate future to have kids, but when that time
comes, what I can promise you is I am going to be just as dedicated, just
as loyal, and for most of you out there applying for these things, this is
your dream. This is your passion. This is what you have worked for, for
some of you, since you were eight years old. Like when I was eight years
old. And you knew that this was what you wanted to do. And in those
situations, just give them that simple reassurance, in a very calm, cool,
collected way. It kind of gets past this issue. So always remember that
for some of these questions that do seem very inappropriate, even
though the words being used do semantically say something, there's
oftentimes a meaning underneath it. They are looking for a specific kind
of answer, a kind of reassurance, and that's what you want to provide
them.
Meghann: This is a bunch of follow-up questions about that, for people who already
have a family, either a spouse or a child, or are going to be visibly
pregnant during interviews.
Dr. Jay Singh: Sure, of course. Okay. So let's take those one at a time, okay? So first,
let's say that you have a spouse, and no kids. Sometimes, people will ask,
I got asked on interviews whether I was married or not. I'm not. In these
sorts of situations, usually what I would say is, no, I haven't found the
right one yet, but I'm looking. Something like that, right, very simple, for
a single guy, or a single young lady. Versus, let's say that I am somebody
who has a spouse, right? What I would do is basically bring them up in
conversation, when it comes to something that would be a commonality.
So for example, somebody says oh, like in Tampa, for example. In Tampa,
somebody really loves hockey. Let's say your husband's name is Jeff. Jeff
loves hockey, too. Oh, my husband Jeff, he's a huge fan of the
Washington Capitols. I'm looking forward to actually taking him to some
Lightning games, he'll probably be going to all of them. I don't know,
maybe you guys can go together sometime. Something like this.
What you want to establish is some sort of commonality there, as
opposed to kind of leaving it as kind of dead weight and random facts,
you want to bring it up in a positive context, in a positive situation. We
have to be spin doctors. None of us are salespeople, but we do have to
sell ourselves in this situation, or at least sell the best side of ourselves.
So, if you have a spouse and you already have kids is the next one, right?
So this is something where, okay, remember. That's what's being asked
at the top. Do you have any kids already? What's being asked
underneath that is, are you too busy? Are you not going to be able to be
as productive as somebody maybe who's single and doesn't have kids?
That is what they're trying to get at. And so again, reassurances. You
may even bring up your record. Oh, you know, they're kids, right, I mean,
there's no question that they're a handful. What I think is that I've been
really pleased over the past several years, and I hope that my CV shows
it, that I've been very productive when it comes to publishing, being able
to contribute professionally by being an ad hoc reviewer on several
journals.
And when it comes to clinical work, I am there at nine o'clock, I'm there
until five. And unless there's a family emergency, which happens
exceptionally rarely, I would say that I can keep work at work, and home
at home. And I think with relative ease, I can do that. That would be my
response to that. And let's say that you're then visibly pregnant during
the time. Then what I would say is, laying out a specific plan. People are
afraid of what they don't know. And if you go into a situation like this, it's
something that likely is going to be asked. In some capacity, maybe they
won't bring it outright, but some capacity. And what will end up
happening is, if you already have a plan in place, in terms of, my plan is
I'm due in January, and I'm planning on taking three months off. And
during that time period, I'm really looking forward to, in addition to
spending time with my little boy, is going to be catching up on reading. I
think this is something where I'm looking forward to mastering some new
things. Maybe I'm going to be reading some of the articles of other
colleagues who are in the department at the time. And because of that,
when I'm reading these pieces, I can be better equipped than ever.
Because when I come back, I'm not only able to hit the ground running,
but I have a whole bunch of new research ideas, that are things that I can
contribute.
 
Site name: Texas State University Counseling Center (UCC)
-Date notified: 12/3/2014 at 7.30 pm EST.
-Invite or rejection: Invitation.
-Track (please specify even for general tracks): General track.
-How notified (mass email, personal email, phone): A mass email that was personalized only because they addressed it to me directly.
-Interview dates offered: On-site interviews: December 16th, January 6th, and January 7th. Phone interviews: December 17th, January 8th, and January 9th.
 
Just noticed that I had a voicemail (my phone died and I it was on the charger in the other room)

University of Maryland College Counseling Center: interview invite
personal phone call 🙂

Awesome! My well wishes to you worked :luck: and likewise, since your well wishes yesterday or the day before to me secured me an interview after a 3-in-a-row rejection strike. Keeping the positivity up! Good luck everyone :soexcited:
 
Awesome! My well wishes to you worked :luck: and likewise, since your well wishes yesterday or the day before to me secured me an interview after a 3-in-a-row rejection strike. Keeping the positivity up! Good luck everyone :soexcited:

thanks so much! They did work! 😀
 
I'm teaching an undergrad psych class right now, and a student email me yesterday to ask if she can interview me about my clinical experienced. It was titled "Interview." My stomach dropped haha.

I had something similar happen. I got an invitation to a party and the subject was "invitation." My heart started pounding immediately and I could hardly swallow I was so excited. Then I realized it was just a lame party invitation.
 
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