affirmative action thread

[2badr]

Originally posted by silvercholla
I have a clothing question... I was thinking of foregoing underwear and just "Sharon Stone" it. What do you guys think???

Kinda got off topic in this thread,eh?

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[DW]

Originally posted by chips
don't want to hog the thread but:

quick question--what's the verdict on lighting up a joint before the interview to relax?

a. yay
b. nay
c. far out
d. share the spliff with us fellow prospectees, mofo

none of the above man. if you REALLY want to relax before the interview, well, you've seen "Something about Mary", right? Just get to the admissions office a little early, find the nearest bathroom, and choke the bishop. I pretty sure I found this interviewing tip in a Princeton Review guide book somewhere............

 

[14931]

more advice?

and for those of u adhering to these advices , could u let us know how ur interviews went?

 

[LoveDoc]

funny my "let's create pre-allo board for urms was moved expeditiously" but this worthless thread which has nothing to do with pre-medicine.....remains?

SDN MODERATOR::::::WHY IS THIS THREAD STILL HERE?

 

[Cerberus]

Originally posted by LoveDoc
funny my "let's create pre-allo board for urms was moved expeditiously" but this worthless thread which has nothing to do with pre-medicine.....remains?

SDN MODERATOR::::::WHY IS THIS THREAD STILL HERE?

screw off

 

[Explosivo]

Originally posted by LoveDoc
funny my "let's create pre-allo board for urms was moved expeditiously" but this worthless thread which has nothing to do with pre-medicine.....remains?

SDN MODERATOR::::::WHY IS THIS THREAD STILL HERE?

Obviously one more parody we forgot, pre-meds without any sense of humor.

 

[DW]

Originally posted by LoveDoc
SDN MODERATOR::::::WHY IS THIS THREAD STILL HERE?

if you hate this thread so much, why are YOU still here?

trolly olly ohhh........

 

[SouthernGirl]

This thread is the funniest thing I've read in ages! And you know what they say about laughter being the best medicine.

If you don't like it, don't read it! But we need all the stress relief we can get.

 

[cabruen]

I have been asked some difficult questions during my interviews, and I need your advice on how to answer them.

1. What is your name?

2. What did you score on the MCAT?

3. What classes are you taking now?

4. What is the last job you have had?

5. What did you do last summer?

6. Where were you born?

7. When did you lose your virginity? To whom?

8. Do you think Scrubs is funny?


I think I know what I should say, but I am worried about what the interviewer would think. What is it that I should be telling the admissions committee.

 

[DW]

Originally posted by cabruen
I have been asked some difficult questions during my interviews, and I need your advice on how to answer them.

1. What is your name?

2. What did you score on the MCAT?

3. What classes are you taking now?

4. What is the last job you have had?

5. What did you do last summer?

6. Where were you born?

7. When did you lose your virginity? To whom?

8. Do you think Scrubs is funny?


I think I know what I should say, but I am worried about what the interviewer would think. What is it that I should be telling the admissions committee.

These are doozies man, how could you handle these ? I at least would have handled them like so, or asked for another interview, geez:

1. My first name is kinda dull, so I would give myself some exotic sounding moniker like "Enrique" or "Flavio". Med schools dont want any more Charles, Johns, Janes or Steves, its all about increasing diversity

2. Its perfectly acceptable practice to embellish your MCAT score by at least 5 points, I mean, its not like they're going to check or anything. Or, to break the ice with your interviewer, you could say something like "take your age, subtract around 20-30, and my score is around that number somewhere". Cant miss answer

3. Go ahead and tell them what classes you're taking. While you're at it, tell them how often you skip class too, and how all your classses are a joke right now and you plan on doing no work in them. Its med school, and they want to see you wont be bothered with some trivial undergraduate work

4. Again, be honest. If your job is too "boring" and not great interview fodder, pick up something part time like stripping, money laundry, or coke trafficking before the next session so you can talk about your experiences.

5. The correct answer to this question was "thinking about how wonderful it would be to go your med school, like i have every summer and every other waking moment of my life as well"

6. This is a trick question, be on your toes. You want to be able to name the exact ward, floor of the hospital you were born in, the names of the doctors and nurses during all stages of the delivery, what types of pre delivery medication your mother had received and her insurance carrier. if you cant manage these holes in your application, the adcoms wil be suspicious

7. If your interviewer is of the opposite sex, say you haven't lost it, but you'd be willing to entertain offers. again, cant miss answer

8. Yes, only cause its got that dude from "Office Space"

I think that covers it

 

[Cerberus]

Guys, I have a serious question and need your honest responses.
I am an international student with an undergraduate GPA of 1.28 and an MCAT of 2V, 4P, 1B N - I know this is a little low but English is not my first language. Do you think I have a shot at a US school? I have applied to Harvard, Yale, Stanford, and JHU. Should I retake the MCAT or just have my super wealthy father send all of these schools a truckload of money??

 

[cabruen]

Thanks DW. You are full of great advice!

One more small point, on most of the secondaries it asks about our criminal background. I assume that we only have to answer yes if we served over ten years in prison for something that is medically related correct? I mean I was sentenced to four life senetences for serial murder and rape, but since it has no impact on my ability to be a doctor, they won't care right? I mean it really isn't fair that they hold this against me. I am eligable for parole when I am 85, and am planning to apply as a non-trad. I have read on SDN that they look favorably on that.

Thanks for the advice.

 

[DW]

Originally posted by cabruen
Thanks DW. You are full of great advice!

One more small point, on most of the secondaries it asks about our criminal background. I assume that we only have to answer yes if we served over ten years in prison for something that is medically related correct? I mean I was sentenced to four life senetences for serial murder and rape, but since it has no impact on my ability to be a doctor, they won't care right? I mean it really isn't fair that they hold this against me. I am eligable for parole when I am 85, and am planning to apply as a non-trad. I have read on SDN that they look favorably on that.

Thanks for the advice.

ROFLMAO

 

[Curci]

Who is in Scrubs that was in Office Space? I really can't remember.

Is anyone else a little dissapointed with the second season so far? I CHEERED when I saw that they brought back the lawyer's a cappella group, but I didn't like the classic tv theme show songs as much as the kids' stuff. The Six Million Dollar Man thing was classic though.

Also, I feel really dorky because it's Saturday night and I've got nothing better to do than to prowl the SDN Forums. What's even more alarming is that this place is busier tonight than it usually is!

 

[DW]

Originally posted by Curci
Who is in Scrubs that was in Office Space? I really can't remember.

The guys who plays Dr. Cox was Bob Slidell, one of the "efficency" consultants, in Office Space

"So what would ya say.......YA DO HERE?"

 

[Explosivo]

Originally posted by Cerberus
Guys, I have a serious question and need your honest responses.
I am an international student with an undergraduate GPA of 1.28 and an MCAT of 2V, 4P, 1B N - I know this is a little low but English is not my first language. Do you think I have a shot at a US school? I have applied to Harvard, Yale, Stanford, and JHU. Should I retake the MCAT or just have my super wealthy father send all of these schools a truckload of money??

No problem. You have great chance with those stats!

In fact, my brother's, friend's, plumber's, proctologist's, nephew's, dog catcher's, cousin actually got into Harvard med with a 0.99 GPA and 1V 1P .5B A MCAT score. You should have no problem. In fact Harvard, Yale, Stanford, and JHU are all schools that look beyond the numbers.

Don't forget to bring your cockring to the interviews!!! It is essential if you want to get in. Remember, hunter green only!

Good Luck! Hope this helps!

 

[Explosivo]

Hey guys I have another question. I was at my interview and my interviewer asked if he could sexually molest me with his prosthetic hand.

Ordinarily I would not consider this an "inappropriate question" but this involves a prosthesis so i figure the rules change. I went ahead and said yes but I was wondering if I should write a letter to the adcom about it.

 

[cabruen]

Absolutely write the letter to the Adcom. In addition you need to alert the local and national newspapers (USA Today, NY Times, Washington Post, LA Times, etc.), the local television stations, the major network news departments (ABC, NBC, CBS), and cable news networks (CNN, MSNBC, Foxnews), your local congressman and senators, the president of AAMC, Bill Gates, Kofi Anan, George W. Bush, and the interviewers secretary.

I don't think this will hurt your chances of being accepted.

 

[Cerberus]

Originally posted by Explosivo
Hey guys I have another question. I was at my interview and my interviewer asked if he could sexually molest me with his prosthetic hand.

Ordinarily I would not consider this an "inappropriate question" but this involves a prosthesis so i figure the rules change. I went ahead and said yes but I was wondering if I should write a letter to the adcom about it.

There is nothing uncommon about this. In fact I recieved 6 rectal exams free of charge in the last interview cycle. I would reccomend you send your interviewer a thank you note and be sure to explain how thankful you are for him giving you "hands on" medical experience (remember the paper must be exactly 8 1/5"x11" papyrus paper - preferably from the time of Jesus - written in Cuneiform with ink made<300BC).

 

[Kry]

You guys raise alot of interesting points, and to think all these years I've been going at it all wrong.

 

[athena21]

okay,
so pardon me, but how can a guy wear a cockring without being suffocated sometimes, or it falling off at other times? i'm perplexed and don't get it!

 

[chips]

Originally posted by DW
none of the above man. if you REALLY want to relax before the interview, well, you've seen "Something about Mary", right? Just get to the admissions office a little early, find the nearest bathroom, and choke the bishop. I pretty sure I found this interviewing tip in a Princeton Review guide book somewhere............

well, seeing as too much hair gel is frowned upon on this forum, what do you suggest i do: bottle it up, label it hand lotion and leave it with the secretary, or stick it in the guy's coffee and tell him it's good for him?

 

[Random Access]

Originally posted by DW
The guys who plays Dr. Cox was Bob Slidell, one of the "efficency" consultants, in Office Space

"So what would ya say.......YA DO HERE?"

Damn it...I go out sake bombing, and I miss the thread about Office Space... I can pretty much quote it word for word now...

He took my stapler, and I'm going to set this forum on fire... (sounds much better when you hear me do it live...)

 

[cabruen]

I am a PGY2 at Hopkins in Dermatology after graduating AOA from WashU which I got into with a 42T from Yale undergrad, and I just wanted to make sure all of you premeds understand that no matter how difficult you think medical school is, it will be ten times worse.

 

[Explosivo]

Originally posted by cabruen
I am a PGY2 at Hopkins in Dermatology after graduating AOA from WashU which I got into with a 42T from Yale undergrad, and I just wanted to make sure all of you premeds understand that no matter how difficult you think medical school is, it will be ten times worse.

Thank God!. I was just waiting for someone to mock this one. I really hate it when people do this trying to discourage you. I don't think I've ever met any serious pre-med student that felt that med school and residency would be easy and glorious yet some people feel the strange need to discourage others b/c they themselves may be unhappy. It actually pisses me off. As i understand it there aren't enough physicians to go around not only in primary care but specialists as well. Do we really need to go around discouraging others from going into medicine?

Honestly, when is doing anything significant in life "easy" anyway?

 

[chips]

Originally posted by cabruen
8. Do you think Scrubs is funny?

scrubs is a show for imbeciles. (although i might have chuckled once or twice during the show. i doubt it though.)

by the way, it pays to spend that extra 15 bucks for a glamor shot (instead of a reg passport pic). i sent mine in--a matted black-and-white 2 X 4 of me lying supine on a toppled marble pillar--and my acceptance came two weeks letter with a hand-written note from the dean asking me if i played any water sports.

 

[mvervaine]

can everyone who's ever gotten into medical school or received a secondary from a school that screens PLEASE post your stats here--high school GPA, college name, college GPA, mcat score (post all if taken multiple times), extracurriculars, professors writing LOR, and (if you are good looking) your phone number.

i'm a premed (freshman in high school) and i just want to know what kind of grades i need to get into a good college and what kind of grades i need from that good college to get into med school.

THANKS!!!

and if you REALLY don't mind, can you post your secondary essays to these schools that screen?

 

[Random Access]

Originally posted by mvervaine
can everyone who's ever gotten into medical school or received a secondary from a school that screens PLEASE post your stats here--high school GPA, college name, college GPA, mcat score (post all if taken multiple times), extracurriculars, professors writing LOR, and (if you are good looking) your phone number.

i'm a premed (freshman in high school) and i just want to know what kind of grades i need to get into a good college and what kind of grades i need from that good college to get into med school.

THANKS!!!

and if you REALLY don't mind, can you post your secondary essays to these schools that screen?

Don't forget SAT score! You'll never get into med school if you keep forgetting simple things like that!

 

[Sweet Tea]

MCAT, schemcat. If you didn't rock the PSAT, you have no chance of becoming a doctor. End of story.

 

[Random Access]

Originally posted by chips
i sent mine in--a matted black-and-white 2 X 4 of me lying supine on a toppled marble pillar--and my acceptance came two weeks letter with a hand-written note from the dean asking me if i played any water sports.

The dean sounds like the politician in that Sex and the City episode from early in the 3rd season...

 

[silvercholla]

Originally posted by Random Access
The dean sounds like the politician in that Sex and the City episode from early in the 3rd season...

eeewww the pee pee guy!!!!

But anyway I took the MCAT's like 4,000,003 times, I got like 40+ on all but the 4,000,001 time (got a 39). Should I retake and then suppress the score in case it really sucks... REALLY THIS IS A SERIOUS DILEMMA

 

[agent]

Originally posted by DW
I would give myself some exotic sounding moniker like "Enrique" or "Flavio". Med schools dont want any more Charles, Johns, Janes or Steves, its all about increasing diversity

*tears running down my face*

 

[Woots32]

Holy sh1t, I never read this thread because I thought it was actually about affirmative action!

 

[Woots32]

but really, I have a serious question that I need help w/ -

At one of my 73 interviews, a 106-year old doctor asked me why I wanted to go into medicine, and I responded, "Because it will be much easier to abuse prescription drugs if i have my own pad."

Was that inappropriate?

 

[Sweet Tea]

Originally posted by Woots32
but really, I have a serious question that I need help w/ -

At one of my 73 interviews, a 106-year old doctor asked me why I wanted to go into medicine, and I responded, "Because it will be much easier to abuse prescription drugs if i have my own pad."

Was that inappropriate?

Not at all-- in fact, he'd probably accept you on the spot b/c of your refreshing honesty.

 

[14931]

could someone pls post their secondary stats?

 

[Woots32]

which secondary? Actually, they're all pretty much the same, since i wrote one essay and cut and pasted it. Though I think I should have been more careful. On my Northwestern one there was a line about how wonderful a town Iowa City is... do you think that may be why I didn't hear from them w/in 24 hours of their first interview invite?

 

[pathdr2b]

You know DW, you could also change your name to:


Shanika-Shakwan Bonita Silverstein.

That way the adcoms will think you're a transexual, black hispanic that practices Judaism!

 

[agent]

Originally posted by pathdr2b
You know DW, you could also change your name to:


Shanika-Shakwan Bonita Silverstein.

That way the adcoms will think you're a transexual, black hispanic that practices Judaism!

awesome!

 

[DW]

Originally posted by Woots32
but really, I have a serious question that I need help w/ -

At one of my 73 interviews, a 106-year old doctor asked me why I wanted to go into medicine, and I responded, "Because it will be much easier to abuse prescription drugs if i have my own pad."

Was that inappropriate?

not inappropriate at all. as a matter of fact, at my GW interview with the dean of admissions, he asked me about my clinical exposure. I preceded to explain to him my thorough previous experience with intravenous drug delivery during my days as a heroin addict, and how the sterile techniques I learned as a smack fiend would not only help get my fellow classmates high during the doldrums of medical school, but prevent iatrogenic injury and infection on the wards. He was very impressed, I could tell

 

[Woots32]

Originally posted by DW
not inappropriate at all. as a matter of fact, at my GW interview with the dean of admissions, he asked me about my clinical exposure. I preceded to explain to him my thorough previous experience with intravenous drug delivery during my days as a heroin addict, and how the sterile techniques I learned as a smack fiend would not only help get my fellow classmates high during the doldrums of medical school, but prevent iatrogenic injury and infection on the wards. He was very impressed, I could tell

Hate to be a pessimist, but you have terribly misread how you did at your interview. How could you have missed an obvious opportunity to relate your personal drug history to larger social issues, such as free needle programs and the legalization of medicinal marajuana? I would be shocked if he didn't immediately get on the phone and call all of the other adcomms of the schools that you replied to and informed them of your total lack of humanitarianism.

 

[cabruen]

I got this email from Harvard today, and I am having a hard time figuring out what it means. Please help.

"We have reviewed your application, and as the Dean of Admissions I just wanted to drop you a personal note to tell you that it is the most pathetic awful application I have seen in my 30 years at this post. I have personally emailed all of the admissions committees of every US, Canadian, and Caribean allopathic and DO school putting them on notice how wretched you are. YOu are not only not going to be a doctor, we are petitioning your undergraduate and high school to revoke your degrees. Every hospital in a town with over 100 people have instituted a 100 yard restaining order to prevent you from even approaching them. Should you even use medical terms or watch a medical television show, we will personally fine you $100.

Best of luck on your future pursuits."

Do you think I have a shot there?

 

[Sweet Tea]

cabruen--

obviously there was something wrong with the dean's voice recognition system to send you such an ambiguous email. regardless, a personal contact from the dean is always a great sign. even though it's not yet october 15th, i think you can be assured of an acceptance from harvard very soon.

 

[chips]

Originally posted by cabruen
I got this email from Harvard today, and I am having a hard time figuring out what it means. Please help.

"We have reviewed your application, and as the Dean of Admissions I just wanted to drop you a personal note to tell you that it is the most pathetic awful application I have seen in my 30 years at this post. I have personally emailed all of the admissions committees of every US, Canadian, and Caribean allopathic and DO school putting them on notice how wretched you are. YOu are not only not going to be a doctor, we are petitioning your undergraduate and high school to revoke your degrees. Every hospital in a town with over 100 people have instituted a 100 yard restaining order to prevent you from even approaching them. Should you even use medical terms or watch a medical television show, we will personally fine you $100.

Best of luck on your future pursuits."

Do you think I have a shot there?

oh, don't be too hard on yourself, cabruen. along with the 'we regret to inform you yada yada yada' that came on my harvard rejection i got a post script from the dean who said:

"We could have easily filled our entire class with people who have 40+ MCAT scores so if you think this is all a numbers game, well, you are absolutely right. Happy DO hunting."

 

[chips]

argh. someone just pmed me and pointed out that i am contradicting myself. if it makes you feel any better, i have multiple personality disorder. personality one, Bull-Horned Thunder-Thighs (clan not named) got into Hvard EDP. personality two, Mariposa (non-descript caucasian from above-avg background), received a rejection letter earlier this morning. happy?

to pm-er: ever considered a career in internal affairs?

 

[mvervaine]

OH MY GAWD OH MY GAWD OH MY GAWD
itsoctober8sevendaysincountinguntiloctober15that'soneweek!!!!
AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
eventhoughihaven'thadaSINGLEinterviewi'mstillscaredtodeath!!!
isanyoneelseinthesameboat?pleaseshareyouremotions!!!

 

[::Seabass::]

I can't believe it has taken me this long to find this thread. I'm LMAO in my little personaly space at work called a cubicle.

 

[::Seabass::]

so I have two huge scabs on each of knees from a recent bike crash. I was thinking of going out and buying a new suit that has a skirt bottom so when I am sitting there being interviewed, the guy will be so distracted imagining the way I got those scabs, he won't even be able to concentrate on me. what do you think? is this a good way to get into Harvard if he thinks he might be the next lucky guy I go down on my knees for?

 

[DW]

Originally posted by seaworthc
is this a good way to get into Harvard if he thinks he might be the next lucky guy I go down on my knees for?

i think wearing kneepads would be much more suggestive and effective IMHO. Good luck

 

[::Seabass::]

thanks DW

when do you think the alcoholic lurking in the lounge is going to find this thread and ruin it?