Change of heart

[kindasorta]

---

Members don't see this ad.

Anyone had those on your #1 after sending the #1 email?

 

[Miss Alyssa]

Anyone had those on your #1 after sending the #1 email?

What caused your change of heart?

 

[grapefruitlove]

You can have a change of heart after a bad reply to a "you're my #1" email.

I know derm is competitive but I wasn't expecting such a response.... Would've rather had no response so my hopes wouldn't be shattered

 

[Miss Alyssa]

You can have a change of heart after a bad reply to a "you're my #1" email.

I know derm is competitive but I wasn't expecting such a response.... Would've rather had no response so my hopes wouldn't be shattered

yikes, what was the response?

I haven't sent my #1 an email

 

[grapefruitlove]

"we'll see how the match turns out." lovely. I'm debating re applying next year or just back up matching into medicine

 

[dozitgetchahi]

"we'll see how the match turns out." lovely. I'm debating re applying next year or just back up matching into medicine

Um, most of my email responses have been noncommittal along these lines. Not everyone gets the overenthusiastic 'we love you and you're ranked to match' emails. Some programs just don't do that.

 

[akhim]

"we'll see how the match turns out." lovely. I'm debating re applying next year or just back up matching into medicine

you can still rank derm high to see if you can get in or not

 

[grapefruitlove]

I'm definitely ranking derm first, just on the fence about putting medicine at the bottom. Vs not at all to try again next year

 

[smq123]

"we'll see how the match turns out." lovely. I'm debating re applying next year or just back up matching into medicine

My boyfriend went back for a 2nd look at a program he had applied to; the program director told him, point blank, that my boyfriend was not going to end up at that program, based on the likely rank list.

Guess where my boyfriend matched?

So don't lose hope. You don't know how the match is going to turn out.

 

[Miss Alyssa]

yah...

What's better/worse? getting a lack luster response and thus not getting your hopes up, or getting back a love letter, getting excited, then getting crushed on Match day.

I know its probably hard, but you have to *try* not to let their response change your rank list or your excitement level.

 

[kindasorta]

I didn't get a bad response. I got the typical "thanks, glad you liked us" nonsense. I just reconsidered my priorities and lifestyle issues, etc.

How gnarly would it be to pick a new #1? For the record, I wouldn't send out the #1 email to them. I feel like I've used that card already and would want to limit any negative karma.

 

[GoSpursGo]

It's obviously not NICE, but what can you do? PDs know how this thing works, and nothing is binding until the match happens--you would hardly be the first person to change their mind.

At this point I would just do nothing. You might still wind up at that program, in which case as far as anyone need be concerned it was "always" your number 1. If you wind up matching higher on your list, you can send them a short, simple email after the match explaining that circumstances changed and you wound up switching your match list at the last minute--or not, as it's entirely possible you might not have matched there anyways. In any case, it's doubtful they will lose much sleep over not getting one particular candidate

 

[NotAProgDirector]

I didn't get a bad response. I got the typical "thanks, glad you liked us" nonsense. I just reconsidered my priorities and lifestyle issues, etc.

How gnarly would it be to pick a new #1? For the record, I wouldn't send out the #1 email to them. I feel like I've used that card already and would want to limit any negative karma.

Why in the world would you do that? If you still want to go there, leave it your #1. If you don't get in there, the match will work just as hard at putting you into your #2 slot. You don't gain anything by changing the order, other than losing the chance of being at your original #1.

To everyone else on this thread, let's recap:

1. Your #1 emails mean nothing to me. I've been "lied" to too many times (or, "Circumstances changed and I had a change of heart", your choice).

2. Our emails to you mean nothing. I want my top and bottom matches (i.e. my highest and lowest ranked candidates) to be equally happy. Since I have no idea where that will be, I'm generic with everyone.

3. Changing anything based upon what was said, or not said, in post interview communication, is foolish. Even if I tell you that I hated your guts and would rather go empty than have you, and then not rank you at all, you do not get hurt, in any way, if you rank me #1. You'll just match somewhere lower on your list.

Honestly, this thread should be closed to stop the insanity.

 

[gutonc]

Why in the world would you do that? If you still want to go there, leave it your #1. If you don't get in there, the match will work just as hard at putting you into your #2 slot. You don't gain anything by changing the order, other than losing the chance of being at your original #1.

To everyone else on this thread, let's recap:

1. Your #1 emails mean nothing to me. I've been "lied" to too many times (or, "Circumstances changed and I had a change of heart", your choice).

2. Our emails to you mean nothing. I want my top and bottom matches (i.e. my highest and lowest ranked candidates) to be equally happy. Since I have no idea where that will be, I'm generic with everyone.

3. Changing anything based upon what was said, or not said, in post interview communication, is foolish. Even if I tell you that I hated your guts and would rather go empty than have you, and then not rank you at all, you do not get hurt, in any way, if you rank me #1. You'll just match somewhere lower on your list.

Honestly, this thread should be closed to stop the insanity.

This is the only part I disagree with. If we close this one, they'll just start another one. Better to keep the crazy people who don't understand the Match algorithm quarantined in one place.

 

[kindasorta]

Why in the world would you do that? If you still want to go there, leave it your #1. If you don't get in there, the match will work just as hard at putting you into your #2 slot. You don't gain anything by changing the order, other than losing the chance of being at your original #1.

To everyone else on this thread, let's recap:

1. Your #1 emails mean nothing to me. I've been "lied" to too many times (or, "Circumstances changed and I had a change of heart", your choice).

2. Our emails to you mean nothing. I want my top and bottom matches (i.e. my highest and lowest ranked candidates) to be equally happy. Since I have no idea where that will be, I'm generic with everyone.

3. Changing anything based upon what was said, or not said, in post interview communication, is foolish. Even if I tell you that I hated your guts and would rather go empty than have you, and then not rank you at all, you do not get hurt, in any way, if you rank me #1. You'll just match somewhere lower on your list.

Honestly, this thread should be closed to stop the insanity.

You're completely misunderstanding this thread. It's not about changing my #1 based on the email reply I got. I understand with clarity how the match works. It's about changing my #1 because I actually want to choose a different program as #1 for other reasons. The thread is about how that may be received. I'm gathering that PDs don't really care (if they even notice). And even if they do care, it's probably best to look out for good 'ole me rather than worrying about ruffling the feathers of a stranger.

 

[gutonc]

I think you misunderstood me. I have a new #1.

No...I think you misunderstood us.

Nobody cares. Not the program you pledged your undying love to last week. Not your new BFF. Not the third one you're going to kill yourself if you don't match to next week. Nobody. Make your list and move on. As aPD said...programs are lied to repeatedly. They get over it.

 

[kindasorta]

No...I think you misunderstood us.

Nobody cares. Not the program you pledged your undying love to last week. Not your new BFF. Not the third one you're going to kill yourself if you don't match to next week. Nobody. Make your list and move on. As aPD said...programs are lied to repeatedly. They get over it.

Fine and I'll take that heart. But I wasn't the one misunderstanding things here. A whole bunch of words were written about how stupid it would be to change my #1 based on email correspondence and how the match works.

This thread was never about that. At all.

 

[gutonc]

Fine and I'll take that heart. But I wasn't the one misunderstanding things here. A whole bunch of words were written about how stupid it would be to change my #1 based on email correspondence and how the match works.

This thread was never about that. At all.

Actually if you re-read what a lot of other people wrote, it was completely about that. Once you put it out here you no longer control it. And everybody else who followed on to your post were all "I didn't get a good response after my mash note to my #1 so now I'm not even going to rank it." Which is just straight up dumb.

I will grant you that aPD responded directly to you but I think (and I don't speak for him...he's a PD after all, I'm just a simple country oncologist) he was mostly responding to madness you spawned. As was I.

 

[kindasorta]

Actually if you re-read what a lot of other people wrote, it was completely about that. Once you put it out here you no longer control it. And everybody else who followed on to your post were all "I didn't get a good response after my mash note to my #1 so now I'm not even going to rank it." Which is just straight up dumb.

I will grant you that aPD responded directly to you but I think (and I don't speak for him...he's a PD after all, I'm just a simple country oncologist) he was mostly responding to madness you spawned. As was I.

i will accept this

 

[inmyslumber]

This was a quick resolution!

Agree with aPD completely. Wish the PD in my own department (Anesthesiology) was as sensible and/or knowledgeable.

-ims

 

[zappeuse]

what if you had a very positive reply but still changed your mind..

 

[shan564]

what if you had a very positive reply but still changed your mind..

Oh, that changes everything. You should offer to pay for the PD's psychotherapy after the trauma of not getting you in the Match. PTSD is no joke.

 

[medking]

what if you had a very positive reply but still changed your mind..

Lame, unless it changed due to "family issues" or something of that nature where you couldn't predict or know about beforehand.

 

[zappeuse]

oh, that changes everything. You should offer to pay for the pd's psychotherapy after the trauma of not getting you in the match. Ptsd is no joke.

 

[GoSpursGo]

what if you had a very positive reply but still changed your mind..

Again, what exactly are you going to do about it now? It's not nice, but you have to do what's best for you, and PDs know this. You will hardly be the first or last person to disappoint them.

 

[Random Anesthesiologist]

Why in the world would you do that? If you still want to go there, leave it your #1. If you don't get in there, the match will work just as hard at putting you into your #2 slot. You don't gain anything by changing the order, other than losing the chance of being at your original #1.

To everyone else on this thread, let's recap:

1. Your #1 emails mean nothing to me. I've been "lied" to too many times (or, "Circumstances changed and I had a change of heart", your choice).

2. Our emails to you mean nothing. I want my top and bottom matches (i.e. my highest and lowest ranked candidates) to be equally happy. Since I have no idea where that will be, I'm generic with everyone.

3. Changing anything based upon what was said, or not said, in post interview communication, is foolish. Even if I tell you that I hated your guts and would rather go empty than have you, and then not rank you at all, you do not get hurt, in any way, if you rank me #1. You'll just match somewhere lower on your list.

Honestly, this thread should be closed to stop the insanity.

This makes me sad. I sent a very sincere email to my #1 to indicate they were my #1, all other programs I was interested in matching were "very very highly ranked" or "very highly ranked". Rank list certified and I'm never looking at it again. Ok, I'm never changing it again

Even though I'm not applying to your specialty, there are a few of us out there with integrity.