Dating a College Student While in Med School?

[AZRobbins]

Hi there,

My current girlfriend is 2 years behind me in school, so she will still be an undergrad for my first 2 years of med school. How common is it for med students to date college students?

I'm aware that most of my peers will be older than me, given that I'm not taking time off, so I'm not sure how common this experience is. Do many med students have long distance S.O.s?

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[deleted103644]

All seriousness, plenty of people do this, but don’t necessarily expect it to last.

Think the attrition rate for long distance college relationships in med school is about 50% per year for the first two years, trailing off in clinical.

 

[stickgirl390]

I don’t think most of your med school peers will be older than you. There will be a lot, but most of them will still be your age.

 

[puahate]

At least you have a gf

 

[altblue]

I think you could make it work if you put in the effort. When I was a freshman I was in LDR with a girl at a different college. We later broke it off because we weren't compatible, but not because of the distance.

Med school is a heavier committment for sure, more challenging to balance an LDR in, but it's been done successfully

 

[yobo9345]

Smithie? I think its different for us. You won't be the first to accomplish an LDR, theres so few of us anyway that when you find a good one, its often best to fight for it. If your gf has reasonable expectations you can make it work.

 

[Dream of the Endless]

I have 3 real-life experiences to share with you that all occurred in the past few years to people aged 21-24. Should you choose to read them I want you to know that at the end of the day if you want to make a relationship work... it's going to take work. Tremendous amounts of maintenance especially for long distance stacked with the new stress from medical school. Everything comes down to her expectations as well as how bad you want it and how willing you are to put forth the effort/time to do it. Conversations about how you two will mediate the distance and your long-term plans (marriage?) would make your lives simpler. Does she understand what you are about to get yourself in to? I mean does she REALLY understand? But if you trust her, I agree with Yobo.

1. Best case scenario. A friend at a medical school in South FL went long distance for x1 year and her boyfriend eventually moved down there to be with her after completing undergrad. Dated for x1 year prior to this occurring. Found out he made trips almost every weekend to see her.

2. Two friends made it into medical schools in different states and agreed to continue dating. They broke it off after completing the first year. When asked by my fiancee she said the distance and the mental burden of school put him towards the back of her mind. Their relationship was x3 years prior.

3. A friend of a friend dated a man for just shy of x2.5 years. He went off to a dental school that is only x2-3 hours north of where she lived. Within the first semester, they were arguing even more than normal. He breaks up with her midway through that semester. Later find out he cheated. Granted, the relationship was already shaky in my humble opinion.

 

[MDProspect]

I recently ended my 8-year relationship. I managed to do the long distance for 1.5 years, which lasted much longer than most of the long-distance relationships of my peers. My first year, I'd travel home every few weeks, but this year, I only came back for the winter break after being away since the beginning of the school year. My biggest issue with dating a non-med student was that they did not understand what it is like to be in medical school. You will have good days and a myriad of bad days. It does not help when you try to vent to your partner, but they downplay your frustrations or try to relate to you instead of just listening. I was not the only one who had this experience. Also, several of my classmates had to end their relationships because their SOs could not understand why their partners were studying during the weekends and breaks. 12-15 hour study sessions are a common occurrence that seem bizarre to the layperson. The relationships that are still going strong are those where the non-med student partner moved in with the student, those that were already married, or with children, and the relationships where both partners are locals.

 

[Hawkenthesky]

Hi there,

My current girlfriend is 2 years behind me in school, so she will still be an undergrad for my first 2 years of med school. How common is it for med students to date college students?

I'm aware that most of my peers will be older than me, given that I'm not taking time off, so I'm not sure how common this experience is. Do many med students have long distance S.O.s?

I actually had 2 friends who did similar things and several years later they’re both happily engaged to their S.O.s, so I’m sure it’s pretty common!

 

[narla_hotep]

I did this for a year while I was in med school and my bf was finishing up college. Aside from the usual difficulties of long distance relationships, the college/med school aspect of it worked out fine!

 

[Seihai]

It’s fairly common I mean I did that while I was in med school

Mate. This thread is almost a full year old. The OP of this thread stopped posting on SDN in May.

 

[Schwifty]

It’s fairly common I mean I did that while I was in med school

This is the 3rd dating thread you have commented on, stop bring up all these old dating threads

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

Closing zombie thread before it eats our brains.