Did your parents attend your white coat ceremony?

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Imogen

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I'm an incoming med student and I don't want my parents to attend my white coat ceremony. We don't get along that well, so I feel like it'll be awkward to have them there and the trip is also an expense that they really can't afford.

I was curious if any of you didn't have your parents at your ceremony either. I'd much rather just take my fiance.
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you can just not tell them about it and not go.
 
Oh I want to go myself. Plus, I think it's mandatory for the students to attend. And I actually didn't tell my parents about it. My mom went and called the freaking school and found out.
 
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you must somehow get rid of your helicopter parents ASAP because they will only hold you back.
 
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Imogen said:
Oh I want to go myself. Plus, I think it's mandatory for the students to attend. And I actually didn't tell my parents about it. My mom went and called the freaking school and found out.
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That's rough man. My school will be issuing out tickets, 2 for each student. So no ticket, no admission to the ceremony. Is your school like that?
 
Mine aren't coming-- it's too expensive for the hotels and they have work. I don't think it's that big of a deal.

I also don't think I'll invite anyone for Match Day (if I make it that far :scared:). It would be so embarrassing to burst into tears in front of my parents if I find out that I matched at the bottom of my list.
 
Mine went. There were plenty of people who didnt have anyone come. It's a pretty new ritual, only about 25 years old. Nowadays everyone and their mothers have a white coat ceremony (not just future doctors but people like chiropractors, pharmacists and occupational therapists have one.)
 
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Dmr6186 said:
That's rough man. My school will be issuing out tickets, 2 for each student. So no ticket, no admission to the ceremony. Is your school like that?
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No. I wish it were! Mine has tickets (that you pay for) but they're unlimited. As a result, I'm already trying to talk my parents down from inviting grandparents, aunts, etc.

I am so jealous of all of you with parents that aren't coming. Gonna try to convince my parents by telling them about people like you!
 
You don't get along, but maybe they're still proud of you and want to be there?

My dad went to my school in the pre white coat ceremony era, and he's going although he thinks it's kind of weird haha
 
My dad went to med school in the pre-white coat era too but he's super gung-ho about it. He knew more about it than me when he asked me about tickets! If they want to come, let them. It's like an hour out of your life that you have to desk with and they're grown ups by hey can decide what's too expensive and what's not.
 
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I get along great with my parents, and they're local. I still haven't/probably won't tell them about it.

We went out to eat and celebrated acceptance. IMO the whole white coat thing is a little silly, so we'll celebrate again at graduation :)
 
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Imogen said:
No. I wish it were! Mine has tickets (that you pay for) but they're unlimited. As a result, I'm already trying to talk my parents down from inviting grandparents, aunts, etc.
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They make people pay to attend? That seems unnecessary considering how far some families travel.
 
I think if they want to come and be proud of you and your achievements, then so be it. You really have to pick your battles in life. I think the one that goes "I don't get along super great with my parents so I don't want them to come to something that signifies the beginning of my path into this career" isn't one that you really want to fight, especially if they're being adamant about it.

They'll be there, you won't be allowed to sit next to them (as all students have to sit together) and you'll see them for probably an afternoon +/- evening after the event is over before they go home. Unless you have some serious issues with your parents where you REALLY DO NOT LIKE THEM and are OK completely disassociating with them (like never see them again, not part of the will, etc. etc.) I (personally) wouldn't go through these steps.

However, I have a good relationship with my parents, so maybe I just don't understand your frustration/feelings. My 2 cents.

They make people pay to attend? That seems unnecessary considering how far some families travel.
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Med schools will do anything for a buck. The cost of a family travelling doesn't pay for renting out a hotel. Pre-MS1 we had a white coat ceremony fee that ran in the hundreds of dollars per student. Entire thing lasted < 4 hours and involved everyone just coming up and getting white coated by people we didn't know, or family members (if alumni from the school/residency or local physicians).
 
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I get along great with my parents, but they aren't doctors, so they have no idea what a white coat ceremony is. They asked if I wanted them to come (from across the country) I said, nah, not worth it, they said ok.
Said the same thing about match day, although my sister came (we are very close)
And everyone came for graduation.
 
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Mission fail. Parents coming.

Here's to hoping no one gets drunk on wine coolers like at my graduation...
 
My parents went to mine, but that's because they live 40 min away. If I went to school out of state or more than a couple hours away, they wouldn't have bothered.
 
Imogen said:
Mission fail. Parents coming.

Here's to hoping no one gets drunk on wine coolers like at my graduation...
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I think getting drunk on wine coolers sounds like the BEST way to handle a 4+ hour graduation ceremony.




But anyway...like other people said, you really only have to hang around them for like 3 hours and you'll get free lunch and/or dinner out of it.
 
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In retrospect, as a soon to be 4th year, I can't think of anything more of an overly ceremonial premature ejaculatory event than the freshman white coat ceremony.

At the time I thought it was neato. Now I think, wow, if I had known all this had to be navigated successfully for me to be even half way useful to a gambling and/or impoverished public patient I would've skipped it out of embarrassment for the naive audacity of it.
 
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JourneyAgent said:
In retrospect, as a soon to be 4th year, I can't think of anything more of an overly ceremonial premature ejaculatory event than the freshman white coat ceremony.

At the time I thought it was neato. Now I think, wow, if I had known all this had to be navigated successfully for me to be even half way useful to a gambling and/or impoverished public patient I would've skipped it out of embarrassment for the naive audacity of it.
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Journey, did I tell you that I added you to my list of favorite SDN'ers?
 
Imogen said:
No. I wish it were! Mine has tickets (that you pay for) but they're unlimited. As a result, I'm already trying to talk my parents down from inviting grandparents, aunts, etc.

I am so jealous of all of you with parents that aren't coming. Gonna try to convince my parents by telling them about people like you!
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evilbooyaa said:
Med schools will do anything for a buck. The cost of a family travelling doesn't pay for renting out a hotel. Pre-MS1 we had a white coat ceremony fee that ran in the hundreds of dollars per student. Entire thing lasted < 4 hours and involved everyone just coming up and getting white coated by people we didn't know, or family members (if alumni from the school/residency or local physicians).
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Well that sucks.
 
JourneyAgent said:
In retrospect, as a soon to be 4th year, I can't think of anything more of an overly ceremonial premature ejaculatory event than the freshman white coat ceremony.

At the time I thought it was neato.
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I figure the ceremony is more for the parents than the students. I also think we lost something when the ceremony got moved from the start of MS-3 to orientation.

In my case, I was quite cynical about the ceremony. While everybody else was happy to finally start the journey in their short white coat, I felt like this was really just one more step in a very long process. So I had a "pre-med" white coat made at a costume shop. It was an extremely short white coat that was cut at the level of my shoulder blades, and it only had one button in front! I wore it to the white coat ceremony. When they called my name and handed me my regular short white coat on stage, I had to remove my ultra-short pre-med coat first.

Perhaps it was a little ballsy, messing with a ceremony in such a tradition-bound field like medicine, but the deans all got the joke without explanation and thought it was funny as hell. Apparently they secretly take the whole white coat ceremony about as seriously as I do.
 
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sazerac said:
I figure the ceremony is more for the parents than the students. I also think we lost something when the ceremony got moved from the start of MS-3 to orientation.

In my case, I was quite cynical about the ceremony. While everybody else was happy to finally start the journey in their short white coat, I felt like this was really just one more step in a very long process. So I had a "pre-med" white coat made at a costume shop. It was an extremely short white coat that was cut at the level of my shoulder blades, and it only had one button in front! I wore it to the white coat ceremony. When they called my name and handed me my regular short white coat on stage, I had to remove my ultra-short pre-med coat first.

Perhaps it was a little ballsy, messing with a ceremony in such a tradition-bound field like medicine, but the deans all got the joke without explanation and thought it was funny as hell. Apparently they secretly take the whole white coat ceremony about as seriously as I do.
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:laugh: Well played. I would have died laughing out loud.
 
JourneyAgent said:
In retrospect, as a soon to be 4th year, I can't think of anything more of an overly ceremonial premature ejaculatory event than the freshman white coat ceremony.

At the time I thought it was neato. Now I think, wow, if I had known all this had to be navigated successfully for me to be even half way useful to a gambling and/or impoverished public patient I would've skipped it out of embarrassment for the naive audacity of it.
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Agree with this. It isn't for everyone, but I thought it was cool to have a "LOL look they're gonna let me talk to patients, these stupid fools" moment before MS-1.

And yeah, if your parents are cross country or whatever then sure it's fine. My parents were ~4-5 hours away and wanted to come for it. I don't think your parents HAVE to come (as it may have originally sounded in my previous post), but if they want to, I'd be hard pressed to think of a reason for them not to.
 
KinesiologyNerd said:
You don't get along, but maybe they're still proud of you and want to be there?

My dad went to my school in the pre white coat ceremony era, and he's going although he thinks it's kind of weird haha
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Same with my dad, he's all like "a white-coat ceremony, you say? wth is that?" followed by "you haven't even done anything yet."

I agree, even though I'm looking forward to it.

Of course my mom is real excited and can't wait to get pictures from every location and angle known to man when the day comes. So that's good for her I guess :rolleyes:


Imogen said:
Mission fail. Parents coming.

Here's to hoping no one gets drunk on wine coolers like at my graduation...
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Just don't get too drunk, a guy I read about a year or so ago got his acceptance rescinded after getting drunk and using racial slurs in front of the dean. Not saying that'd be you, but it's happened before
 
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HoboCommander said:
you can just not tell them about it and not go.
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this is what I did. my parents live about 800 miles away and I didnt want them to spend all the time and money to come to what I knew would be a 1-2 hour ceremony.
 
lol well I feel like an idiot. My parents are flying cross-country because they're so excited. :(
 
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schwasted589 said:
lol well I feel like an idiot. My parents are flying cross-country because they're so excited. :(
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No worries man. I had my parents there but they live 30 minutes away. If your parents want to fly out many parents will be there. It's a cool ceremony I think.
 
Pasmal said:
Just don't get too drunk, a guy I read about a year or so ago got his acceptance rescinded after getting drunk and using racial slurs in front of the dean. Not saying that'd be you, but it's happened before
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Now that would be entertaining. :laugh:
 
I'm in the same situation. I live at home and my little sister snooping through my mail found a letter about the white coat ceremony and the freshman family day,then told everybody now they all think they are going, I just politely told them " no you're not going." I have a horrible relationship with most people in my family and they have been more of a hindrance than a support system. I really hate the school is making a big deal out of it, why can't we just matriculate and be done with it.
 
EMDO2018 said:
I'm in the same situation. I live at home and my little sister snooping through my mail found a letter about the white coat ceremony and the freshman family day,then told everybody now they all think they are going, I just politely told them " no you're not going." I have a horrible relationship with most people in my family and they have been more of a hindrance than a support system. I really hate the school is making a big deal out of it, why can't we just matriculate and be done with it.
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There are a lot of things that you will do in medical school that you will hate. Is the white coat ceremony "cheesy", probably. But you'll see at the end of 4 years how much power a physician has when it comes to patients. I'd just take it as a chance to be humble. Medicine is more than just studying out of books during MS-1/MS-2. It's MS-3 when things really fall into place.
 
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Yes, but we live 45 minutes away from the school. If I went out of state, it would be highly likely they'd fly out just to see me doing my thang at the white coat ceremony.
 
white coat ceremony was fun, but we got free wine at the reception, so that altered the equation considerably.
 
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EMDO2018 said:
I'm in the same situation. I live at home and my little sister snooping through my mail found a letter about the white coat ceremony and the freshman family day,then told everybody now they all think they are going, I just politely told them " no you're not going." I have a horrible relationship with most people in my family and they have been more of a hindrance than a support system. I really hate the school is making a big deal out of it, why can't we just matriculate and be done with it.
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I was in a similar situation. My mom went. My dad didn't go because my mom was going to be there. Fortunately it's only one day of awkwardness. And then the real fun begins (that was semi-sarcastic).
 
My dad wanted to fly out, but it turns out it's not open to anyone but students and faculty! Darn.

The whole thing really is weird though.
 
If your family wants to go, you shouldn't discourage them. Hopefully by now you've grown out of feeling awkward when your family is around your friends because you've realized every other family is the same way (maybe to different extents, but the same none the less). Your parents are just proud and want to celebrate your accomplishments. Even though it may not seem like a big deal to you, it may be to them. If you ever become a parent one day, you'll understand.
 
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sinombre said:
I agree, I've just always assumed that white coat ceremonies were for the family and friends of new students more than the faculty or students themselves.
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No, it's to make sure the students understand they're now cooler than everyone else (except people with longer coats). Or something.
 
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jonnythan said:
No, it's to make sure the students understand they're now cooler than everyone else (except people with longer coats). Or something.
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Except it makes you feel like a superdork; nothing is more humiliating than putting on the white coat without knowing anything about medicine. I found it taunting.
 
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Anastomoses said:
Except it makes you feel like a superdork; nothing is more humiliating than putting on the white coat without knowing anything about medicine. I found it taunting.
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When I told the guys at work I had gotten accepted to medical school, one of them produced a stethoscope from his desk drawer and hung it up in my cubicle. I have no idea wtf he had a stethoscope to begin with, but I looked at it and felt way more useless than cool lol
 
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just let your parents go if they are wanting to...there is no real benefit to you in denying them a chance, they'll be in town for two days and then leave
 
Thanks OP for starting this thread. I was kind of bummed cause I thought everyone's parents except mine would be there - it would cost too much (time and money wise) for them to attend. I thought the ceremony was little silly at first but then got a little confused because so many people in my class made it seem like a very important event. To each his own, I guess.
 
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