Don't make the same mistakes as me! (for non-trads)

Veterinary Science Graduate Certificate from UofI
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Just to toss in my two cents - as a non-trad it was hard to go back into school and be a student after spending years doing the teaching. Even harder for ME is to look at a case and take each piece apart to come up with a ruleout list and NOT just jump to the first conclusion that comes to mind. After being a Tech for so many years its hard to look at cases and go seriously through a list of potential ruleouts as opposed to look at a case and go "Oh, its this age/breed/signs its probably this disease/problem". But I'm getting better at it and am trying to retrain myself to think outside the box so to speak :)

The other thing is, and I think SOV touched on it, grades in vet school are a bell curve. You can study hard and get a B or a high B. But to get an A you have to do exponentially more work to GET that A - to the point that it becomes obsessive and time prohibitive. If I never wanted to see my friends, never wanted to get out of the house, and never wanted to spend time with my dogs I could do it. But for my own sanity I prefer to spend time outside of school with other people and my dogs :) And you know what? I'm STILL going to be a good vet.

And it is easy to get overwhelmed, but you start to just deal with it. Prioritize, schedule and make time to get everything done that needs to get done. Last week we had two exams and a quiz. This was following our killer exam from the week before, so essentially we crammed in info for our Anatomy exam early in the week, crammed in studying for the quiz on Wednesday and then officially crammed in all of what we could for the Physio exam on friday. Was it ideal? No. But I passed all three with high Bs/low As and was happy with my results. You get used to the volume overload and trying to get it all in!

And FWIW, I don't know how people have relationships in vet school. On weeks where I need to focus I barely talk to my family. I went through a divorce the year before I started vet school, and honestly? I don't think our relationship would have survived if we had have stayed together.
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I think it is nice that Penn allows retakes of classes that you do not pass.

At ISU failing a class means you have failed out of vet school. We have a lockstep curriculum so one fail means you cannot continue. You can petition to try again and matriculate with the next year's class by retaking the class the following year but there is no guarantee you will be allowed back.
I think it adds a definite level of stress to the program but at the same time we do have people fail out of the class each year so I guess the school sees it as a necessary evil? Not sure.

I too am doing better this semester as a non-trad. Less transitioning, (a little) less angst, less feeling like I was thrown into the deep end of a pool with sharks circling and I can't swim. I like the classes better do.
I do miss my fiance more this semester.

Good luck SOV and everyone else finishing up the last stretch of this year:luck:
 
Tobysgirl81 said:
Even harder for ME is to look at a case and take each piece apart to come up with a ruleout list and NOT just jump to the first conclusion that comes to mind. After being a Tech for so many years its hard to look at cases and go seriously through a list of potential ruleouts as opposed to look at a case and go "Oh, its this age/breed/signs its probably this disease/problem". But I'm getting better at it and am trying to retrain myself to think outside the box so to speak :)
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That's a good point, and I think explains a lot of why, according to some at least, adcomms may be leery of admitting experienced techs. I've seen it too with a lot of the great, extremely experienced techs I've worked with - dog comes in with ABC symptoms, and the tech is immediately muttering under her breath about how it clearly is XYZ and we should just start treating, and getting pissy about the vet ordering all these additional tests. Maybe 9 times out of 10 the tech is right and it is XYZ, but I'm beginning to appreciate how the doc really does have to look outside the box and not just jump to the first most obvious explanation. For any "obvious" explanation, there are likely about 10 plausible alternatives, and landing on the wrong one could seriously ruin everyone's day.


And FWIW, I don't know how people have relationships in vet school. On weeks where I need to focus I barely talk to my family. I went through a divorce the year before I started vet school, and honestly? I don't think our relationship would have survived if we had have stayed together
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Seriously. I am amazed how many of my classmates, most in their early-20's, are married/engaged/in serious relationship. I guess I'm a cynical old man (who ain't gettin' any anyway), but I don't get why people are so eager to get paired off so young, when you've got four years of a pressure cooker to get through.
 
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lunajett said:
but I don't get why people are so eager to get paired off so young, when you've got four years of a pressure cooker to get through.
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'Cause being young and in love is a beautiful thing! (says me who's mid-20s desperately trying to make a long distance thing work... crossing my fingers here... cause my world will be turned upside down if it ends)
 
Yep, I met my girlfriend when I was 12 and she was 11 (we are standing next to each other in my 7th grade, her 6th grade, Student Council photo) and started dating when I was 17 and she was 16. Nearly 5 years later, we're still here and going strong. I wouldn't have it any other way. I didn't plan it that way, but that's the way it happened. Will we make it through vet school? I have faith that we will. But I also have a healthy awareness that we might not. But we know each other well enough and communicate well enough that I am very confident we can work through any bumps in the road that may arise along the way. She is amazingly giving and supportive and patient, and her laid-back personality complements my high-strung one perfectly.

I'm sure everyone has their "reason" for whether or not they pair off before vet school, but in my opinion, if things are going well before vet school there's no reason to break things off just because you're going into vet school.
 
I don't think lunajett is saying people shouldn't be in relationships in vet school. I think he, like me, is surprised by how many people in their 20s are in long term relationships these days. It seems to be a generational thing, or perhaps a vet student thing, as in the recent past (no laughing please) the relationships of people in their 20s were much shorter on average it seems....

In fact, now that I think about it, most of the people in their 20s I knew in L.A. were definitely not in LT relationships, unless LT was measured in hours. Hmm, now that just might be an L.A. thing:D.

Anyway, no value judgment either way. More of a sociological observation.
 
i dont think i could last in a relationship if i wasnt with the person I want to marry. and i'm not a young girl who is eager to get paired off fast lol things just happen when they happen. but it all worked out for the best because my bf was able to get a new job in philly with me.
Being in school now with him actually has worked out better for us because he travels 50% of the time and is really busy with his new job. This way we both are too busy to get mad at one another for not spending enough time together. And when our schedules do line up, and we both have some time we can sacrifice, we take advantage of it more than we used to :D

If both people in the relationship aren't equally busy I bet it would be realllly hard to balance
 
StartingoverVet said:
I don't think lunajett is saying people shouldn't be in relationships in vet school.
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Oh, no, I didn't take it that way at all. I was just trying to explain, as a person in her early 20s (21), why I "chose" to pair off at a young age.
 
LOL. I met my SO while I was in 3rd grade, we started dating when I was a sophmore in highschool, and here we are today, with him almost 30 and the relationshiop is better than ever. It isn't how I would have chosen it - and I certaintly didn't plan it this way, but when it comes down to it, there's no one I'd rather be with and my stomach still flip flops when I'm about to see him. If we can make it through vet school with teh relationship intact - then I'll know it's true love forever right? LOL. (I'm 26 BTW).
 
As one of the "20's and married" people, I have to say that having my husband here makes school easier. We've been married almost three years, but have only been living together since we moved to vet school (I was three hours away at undergrad previously). Now I don't have to schedule entire weekends off so that I can spend time with him unlike before. For me, he reminds me that I need to relax at times, and is a pillar of support. I also don't have to worry about finances because he has a job and can support us both. I don't know how my classmates that have to worry about paying for food and rent every month do it.
 
1) It's really interesting to me to see how many here met their SO/BF/GF/Life Partner/husband/wife/etc when they were pretty young. My husband and I met when we were about ten. Didn't "date" until I was in undergrad, though, but I always feel like we're in the minority of people who are in relationships, having met so young. Glad to know we're not such freaks. :D;):laugh:

2) I'm totally scared about moving for vet school. I will go by myself, because we've been building a business over the past few years and are not in a position to move everything. Definitely more scared about this than any other aspect of vet school.
 
Just looked at my class composite and counted 13 people (including myself) whose serious relationships at the time of matriculating were ended at some point during vet school. :( Includes several divorces, and at least one re-marriage (already, to someone they met here). Depressing!

Speaking for myself, I feel like vet school/the specific location (aka the middle of nowhere) has taken away so much of who I am and I'm left with virtually nothing aside from my degree and a handful of incredible friendships. All else...*poof* gone. Sad to think about being 31 and having nothing aside from a specific degree. Would give it back if I could have my former life back!

Just my $0.02. Plenty of people here are very very happy and, needless to say, had a VERY different vet school experience.

SOV, I wish you the best--you have an amazing attitude and I know you're going to rock that re-exam. :)
 
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alliecat44 said:
Speaking for myself, I feel like vet school/the specific location (aka the middle of nowhere) has taken away so much of who I am and I'm left with virtually nothing aside from my degree and a handful of incredible friendships. All else...*poof* gone. Sad to think about being 31 and having nothing aside from a specific degree. Would give it back if I could have my former life back!
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This is my biggest fear, and I think one of the reasons why I am so scared of my relationship ending. My bf it seems like is the only thing that really links me to my former life, and will continue to link me to my former life in the future. Obviously, that is not the reason why I stay with him, he really is the love of my life. But if I'm still with him upon graduation, I will have a place to go. A place that I'm familiar with and love, with lots of fond memories I can relive, and with people to reunite with. Any vet job that I'm comfortable at, which will pay the bills is fine with me.

If I'm not with him though, when I graduate, I'm pretty much going to be 29 with nothing but a degree, walking aimlessly without a concept of "home." I can't imagine myself being especially happy staying in CO, but where else to go? I have siblings and friends scattered throughout (and who knows how long they'll stay in any one place), but that's not really a good reason to move to a particular place. I'll probably go where my career takes me (just as I came here to following the best opportunities for me), but something about that makes me kind of sad.

I still want this DVM degree really badly, and will not give it up. But I've seriously considered giving up the opportunities I've worked hard to get myself here and trying to transfer to be closer to my bf. I've decided against it, but this fear of losing grounding is really stressing me out.
 
Minnerbelle said:
If I'm not with him though, when I graduate, I'm pretty much going to be 29 with nothing but a degree, walking aimlessly without a concept of "home." I can't imagine myself being especially happy staying in CO, but where else to go? I have siblings and friends scattered throughout (and who knows how long they'll stay in any one place), but that's not really a good reason to move to a particular place. I'll probably go where my career takes me (just as I came here to following the best opportunities for me), but something about that makes me kind of sad.

I still want this DVM degree really badly, and will not give it up. But I've seriously considered giving up the opportunities I've worked hard to get myself here and trying to transfer to be closer to my bf. I've decided against it, but this fear of losing grounding is really stressing me out.
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***Old preachy man warning alert***

I completely understand your fear, and it seems quite common. BUT, having moved around a bit in my time, I can honestly say that even the most anti-social of us (talking about me:D) finds ways to lay down roots where-ever we go given time. I miss something about every place I have lived, I miss some people from each of those spots, and still, in hindsight, I am usually (1 small exception) happy with the decisions I made. Things are never perfect, and humans always pine for the past, but the unknown future can be pretty good.

I kind of feel (preach starting) way too many people opt for the comfortable "known" and miss out on a lot of great experiences. Even our mis-steps at least allow us to appreciate the good times even more.

You may find some amazing position or people in Calif or Texas or maybe even Pa :)laugh:). Don't miss out on those chances by clinging to a freezing cold New England memory! (end preach).
 
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StartingoverVet said:
I kind of feel (preach starting) way too many people opt for the comfortable "known" and miss out on a lot of great experiences. Even our mis-steps at least allow us to appreciate the good times even more.

You may find some amazing position or people in Calif or Texas or maybe even Pa :)laugh:). Don't miss out on those chances by clinging to a freezing cold New England memory! (end preach).
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i'm sure the old man wisdom is probably very true :p, but i'm lazy and like to take the easy way out! i'm one of those people who don't fit in very well most places i go, but waaaay too lazy to work on that. hopefully though, if i didn't have a choice, i would find strength in myself to put in some effort. it's just that i've had this fear for a while now, and alliecat's experience just made it all that much more real for me.

funny you bring up cali and texas, 'cause i've been in both (albeit only one location within each) and HATED it. my track record has not been so good in the few places I've tried outside of freezing cold New England. cali weather was good though, and CO isn't bad at all! texas was just bad all around for me, as the 120F weather is far worse than the -10F.
 
alliecat44 said:
Speaking for myself, I feel like vet school/the specific location (aka the middle of nowhere) has taken away so much of who I am and I'm left with virtually nothing aside from my degree and a handful of incredible friendships. All else...*poof* gone. Sad to think about being 31 and having nothing aside from a specific degree. Would give it back if I could have my former life back!
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This is one of the reasons I decided to go OOS to Penn. Everyone says you should take the cheaper school because it is only 4 years. But I really think these same experiences you had would have happened to me if I chose my IS school in the middle of nowhere. To me, I'd rather be hundreds of thousands more in debt and try to maintain my somewhat normal life in the city during school.

I'm sorry all of this happened to you. Its amazing you were able to pull through with a degree during the hard emotional state after a breakup (i'm not sure i could have done that).
But heres to your future: awesome degree, handful of great friendships, and a new life ahead of you with new relationships and an amazing journey that you have yet to see!
 
alliecat44 said:
Just looked at my class composite and counted 13 people (including myself) whose serious relationships at the time of matriculating were ended at some point during vet school. :( Includes several divorces, and at least one re-marriage (already, to someone they met here). Depressing!

Speaking for myself, I feel like vet school/the specific location (aka the middle of nowhere) has taken away so much of who I am and I'm left with virtually nothing aside from my degree and a handful of incredible friendships. All else...*poof* gone. Sad to think about being 31 and having nothing aside from a specific degree. Would give it back if I could have my former life back!

SOV, I wish you the best--you have an amazing attitude and I know you're going to rock that re-exam. :)
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Honestly, even though my relationship has lasted (I'm definitely one of the younger people that is married in my class), I feel like what you're saying here is true. I used to have a life outside vet school. But now even when I talk to my husband, its mostly vet school related. I haven't been able to keep up with friends from high school and undergrad (there will always be a few people I keep in touch with). There are definitely a lot of people here who have ended serious relationships and started new ones, too, but I don't have a number.

I also second the other part of this quote. Good luck, SOV.
 
dyachei said:
But now even when I talk to my husband, its mostly vet school related. I haven't been able to keep up with friends from high school and undergrad (there will always be a few people I keep in touch with). .
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I have found that the further I go in vet school, the harder it is for me to make conversation with folks who aren't in vet school with me. It makes me feel super self-centered. I'm also having a harder and harder time recalling info -- I feel like my brain is just overflowing with these random facts, but I can't remember really basic stuff that I did last summer.

Oh well. I'm plugging through. Only around 6 weeks until summer!
 
twelvetigers said:
I can guarantee you that I didn't plan on meeting my husband when I was 17, but here we are. Eight years together today, actually.
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Hey TT, that's awesome! Hubs and I have been together since we were 16, got married at 20, and have been together 7.5 years (married for 3 of 'em)! Nice to see there are others out there like us. :)
 
Minnerbelle said:
If I'm not with him though, when I graduate, I'm pretty much going to be 29 with nothing but a degree, walking aimlessly without a concept of "home."
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It's amazing how much perspective colors things. To you, being "29 with nothing but a degree" is negative. To me, it sounds like you're right at the cusp of launching an amazingly satisfying life. 29 is YOUNG. You've got an incredibly hard-to-attain degree that, unlike a lot of degrees, can lead you into a wide variety of jobs/interests.

You're obviously a nice person, you've got tons of time in life, and you are equipped to do a wide variety of really interesting, meaningful activities.

You'll be fine. Once you get out of school and start getting some longer-term ties to places and people, you'll feel more solid. :)
 
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LetItSnow said:
It's amazing how much perspective colors things. To you, being "29 with nothing but a degree" is negative. To me, it sounds like you're right at the cusp of launching an amazingly satisfying life. 29 is YOUNG. You've got an incredibly hard-to-attain degree that, unlike a lot of degrees, can lead you into a wide variety of jobs/interests.

You're obviously a nice person, you've got tons of time in life, and you are equipped to do a wide variety of really interesting, meaningful activities.

You'll be fine. Once you get out of school and start getting some longer-term ties to places and people, you'll feel more solid. :)
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You know, that is a really nice way of putting it - you just made me feel a whole lot better about my situation too. Thanks :)
 
I'll graduate at 29 and I still would like to pursue a residency, I think. So... pfft. I think that's fine. I understand what you mean about feeling like you don't really have a place to call 'home,' but really, home is what you make of it.

If your relationship doesn't last through vet school... well, I dunno. I would drop the standard line ("it wasn't meant to last anyway") but I don't really think that's true. Vet (med, dent, pharm, whatever) school has to be pretty hard on a relationship. But it can work out, too... I mean, it's not destined for failure, either.

I dunno.

Pelagia, I 'met' my husband when I was 14 or 15 but didn't think much of him until the end of my junior year of high school. There was a period of time where I wondered what I might be missing out on by committing so fully to my first real relationship. But... well, I got over it. We've been married for four years, and we're happy. We've made it this far without any unsurmountable hurdles. So... yeah. Nothing wrong with starting young if you're certain.

And yeah, the above paragraph may sound immature... whatever. I'll come back to this thread in 4 years and let the future SDN generation know if a seemingly perfect relationship can weather vet school. Until then, I'll probably just stick with the rosy outlook, if that's okay with y'all.
 
twelvetigers said:
If your relationship doesn't last through vet school... well, I dunno. I would drop the standard line ("it wasn't meant to last anyway") but I don't really think that's true. Vet (med, dent, pharm, whatever) school has to be pretty hard on a relationship. But it can work out, too... I mean, it's not destined for failure, either.
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yeah, that's my worry. I feel like if it weren't for vet school, and I continued going the research route, we would be well on our way to getting happily married. We're going pretty strong as of now, but he's def brought up that he doesn't like the long distance thing. dunno if he can hang on for 3 more years. Finding out that he's the right person, but wrong time and place would be really sad.

twelvetigers said:
I'll come back to this thread in 4 years and let the future SDN generation know if a seemingly perfect relationship can weather vet school. Until then, I'll probably just stick with the rosy outlook, if that's okay with y'all.
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somehow of all people, i don't doubt that you'll remember to come back and post in 4 years. Seriously rosy it away! Doubt and uncertainty can in itself be what starts problems that lead to major relationship probs, so no need to bring that in if you don't have to!
 
Minnerbelle said:
yeah, that's my worry. I feel like if it weren't for vet school, and I continued going the research route, we would be well on our way to getting happily married. We're going pretty strong as of now, but he's def brought up that he doesn't like the long distance thing. dunno if he can hang on for 3 more years. Finding out that he's the right person, but wrong time and place would be really sad.


somehow of all people, i don't doubt that you'll remember to come back and post in 4 years. Seriously rosy it away! Doubt and uncertainty can in itself be what starts problems that lead to major relationship probs, so no need to bring that in if you don't have to!
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Agreed. Attitude/perception can go a long way.
 
Minnerbelle said:
Seriously rosy it away! Doubt and uncertainty can in itself be what starts problems that lead to major relationship probs, so no need to bring that in if you don't have to!
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So true. What you focus on is what you tend to get more of - good or bad. Not saying that outlook on life is everything --- but it certainly plays a role!

TT, no worries - you're going to be supervet/superwoman combined into one. You always seem to have a positive outlook and I doubt that will change just because of a tough curriculum :)
 
I agree with others that perspective is everything, but just to put *my own* situation in perspective...I am extremely open-minded, adaptable, have lived abroad, love experiencing new things. That said, I was making plans with my SO on where we would live, when we would get married, how many children to have and when, where to apply for internship/residency program based on his job prospects and my own career, where we wanted to grow old together, and all the little million decisions you make together when you are a couple and planning on spending the rest of your life together.

Now, I am completely untethered and alone. None of my decisions matter to anyone. You might say that is freeing (and I would have, too, at 22), but to be this age and be completely alone--and looking for yet another roommate for only a year, living with people five years younger than me and like a college student--it's pretty depressing. Just saying.

When the ONLY thing you have in life that is AT ALL fulfilling is your degree--and when that degree cost you $250K--it makes you feel pretty empty.

Not that I should have to justify the way I feel, but it's a bit insulting to hear other people say that it's basically my fault for not having my "chin up" and being open-minded or whatever. Things suck.

If someone had told me that I could go to vet school but would lose EVERYTHING else in my life--including relationshps with my family--I would never have made the trade. It is NOT worth it.
/end depressing rant

There are certainly plenty of other people in my class whose relationships have survived vet school and it's definitely not impossible.
 
alliecat44 said:
Not that I should have to justify the way I feel, but it's a bit insulting to hear other people say that it's basically my fault for not having my "chin up" and being open-minded or whatever. Things suck.

If someone had told me that I could go to vet school but would lose EVERYTHING else in my life--including relationshps with my family--I would never have made the trade. It is NOT worth it.
/end depressing rant
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Wow, you certainly have the right to feel that way, and I don't see how anyone (including me) could justifiably say it is your fault. You are certainly going to be in the majority for feeling sh**ty that a relationship you had invested so much in ended.

As for whether vet school is worth it or not.... I would agree that for you now, it does not seem worth it, but maybe, just maybe, your answer will change with some time and distance...

Right now you are at the end of a lot of negatives without reaping any of the positives yet. I've gotta think that balance is going to change for the better for you and I hope it does.
 
Alliecat-i would have felt the same way as you, i guess it is the type of personality we have. I get my energy from being around other people and when that is gone I get depressed. I really had trouble making the adjustment of graduating from undergrad and working because I lost all of my best friends when they went to other states. But at this time, the 3 people I did still have was my boyfriend and my parents. I can't imagine going through that feeling completely alone. I guess for the time being just focus on work and try to be as social as possible. Things will eventually get better :)

I also found that joining diff organizations volunteering (non vet stuff! lol), clubs (DC has many non-competitive kickball teams), or class (an art class? photography?) helps to meet people and real friends as opposed to going to bars lol. Maybe there is something around you like that...if you have any free time :confused:

nyanko-i understand what you're saying. but I think in this case it depends on the type of personality that we have (what you mentioned in your second post) more than how many places you've lived. I've moved a lot and been exposed to midwest vs. city life and I love experiencing new places (i actually tend to get sick of a place if I stay there too long lol)
 
It sounded to me like allicat was responding more to the pre-vet people who were saying she was negative than to the couple people who just responded...

I don't think it's all about attitude, life sucks ass sometimes and it's better to just experience that than trying to force yourself into something cheerful when it's not there. Vet school is going to take something from you, whether it is relationships or sanity or confidence or just a ridiculous amount of your time. It's one thing to be looking forward to vet school and think it won't take something from you but it will. And doing it without your parents sucks, and doing it without the person you thought you'd be spending your life with sucks. No amount of positive attitude is going to fix that.
 
bunnity said:
It sounded to me like allicat was responding more to the pre-vet people who were saying she was negative than to the couple people who just responded...

I don't think it's all about attitude, life sucks ass sometimes and it's better to just experience that than trying to force yourself into something cheerful when it's not there. Vet school is going to take something from you, whether it is relationships or sanity or confidence or just a ridiculous amount of your time. It's one thing to be looking forward to vet school and think it won't take something from you but it will. And doing it without your parents sucks, and doing it without the person you thought you'd be spending your life with sucks. No amount of positive attitude is going to fix that.
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dang bunnity, keepin' it REAL! I'm not sure I entirely agree, but I am definitely the kind of person that will let change in my life totally derail me if I let it. When those moments come, I really have to focus on the positive or I will fall apart.
 
bunnity said:
It's one thing to be looking forward to vet school and think it won't take something from you but it will. And doing it without your parents sucks, and doing it without the person you thought you'd be spending your life with sucks. No amount of positive attitude is going to fix that.
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Agreed, there are some times you just need to hunker down and ride out the storm... and stay away from sharp objects and tall ledges. Telling a depressed person "chin up!" probably won't help much, but the turth is in almost all cases, things eventually WILL get better. But it's hard not to worry about allie, when at what *should* be close to one of the high points of her life, she's in a dark pit not seeing things getting any better.

Allie, I know you just have to work through this on your own, but reading your posts I couldn't help but think... as miserable and filled with regret as you are now, I would gladly make a very large bet that in a couple years (maybe less!) you will be absolutely rocking your life. As others have said, 31 is YOUNG. Yeah, you'll be in debt, but not insurmountably so given you should be making good money. Yeah, you'll be single and basically starting over - scary, but also a fantastic blank slate to make whatever you want out of. It's that old cliche, the world is your oyster. You can't see that now, but from someone 12 years older in much the same boat (except another 3 years of this madness to get through!), believe me, it is. You'll do great and have an awesome life, and millions of people would kill to be in your shoes. I nope you don't take this as devaluing your feelings; like I said you have to own that and work through it. Just my old man wisdom I'm spewing from my rocking chair.
 
I already in the position of trying to evaluate whether vet school is worth the relationships I have (SO, family). And the answer is, I'm not sure.

If my familia relationships start to disenegrate in vet school, what will I chose? I'm hoping never to have to make that choice, in part because I'm so hyper aware of it, that I can take measures to prevent that from happening. I'm putting in a lot of time upfront. I'm making sacrifices now and during school to give those relationships a better shot of surviving. If that means I don't do as well in school - so be it. I would rather be in the bottom half of my class, but with an intact support system of relationships around me, then to lose them.

That's not to say that there won't be a semester that the relationships suffer more than others, but I won't deliberately make choices that will result in even more stress to the relationships than what will already be there as a result of school. For example - summers. What I may WANT to do is spend the summer on the other side of the country doing a completly awesome internship. The other option may be a local internship that isn't quite as cool, but means I get to see the SO, parents, and siblings on a regular basis throughout the summer. I get to chose the local option.

No way of actually knowing how any of this is going to turn out until I'm in school, but it shall be interesting.

PS - I have the "wandering" gene too. Every ~3 years I feel the need for a change whether it be jobs, schools, or location. :) So far I've been able to accomodate this. :) I like seeing new places. I don't especially like travelling - but like going places for a "purpose" (job/internship/pick up something/going to an event).
 
alliecat44 said:
If someone had told me that I could go to vet school but would lose EVERYTHING else in my life--including relationshps with my family--I would never have made the trade. It is NOT worth it.
Click to expand...

God bless ya, alliecat. Definitely rough, rough, rough.

You never know, it's possible your relationship may have ended even if you'd not gone to vet school, and then where would you be? Because life does stink sometimes, you could be in the same boat, having lost SO, family, everything, and you WOULDN'T have your veterinary degree.

I hope and pray that you triumph over these hard times and you, too, come back in a few years with a big, happy smile on your face. You WILL triumph, I just know it.
 
I would like to add this being a 39 year old gal....lost relationships etc, etc...but as some wise women and men older than me when I mention changing course making lots of sacrifices to go to vet school have said repeatedly.... you are going to get older regardless and there are no guarantees in the future regarding relationships. You could be 50 years old and these relationships have ended for whatever reason but not be a veterinarian or you could be 50 years old and these relationships ended and be a veterinarian. Getting the degree and becoming a veterinarian - you have control over this destiny. As for the other things - you have very limited if any control over what happens. So don't relinquish control of your destiny to the things which cannot control. :)
 
Final update on my first year.....

I did my anatomy re-exam after 6 weeks of studying during the summer. It was STILL hard for me... But, I just found out (after coming back from overseas) that I passed it and now I am officially a second year! Took a little longer but here I am.

I also did best academically in the 4th quarter, back to grades that I am more used to.

In hindsight, I can safely say I was not ready for vet school on many levels at the beginning of the year. I had to re-learn how to cram and learn HOW to work hard efficiently. I had to deal with the fact that I was not excelling at something for one of the few times in my (long) life and I had to learn how to deal with my personal married life from a completely different perspective (not confident, not relaxed, and not having the time to commit to it), and to realize that I was the cause of a lot of the trouble.
Also, being one of the students with the least amount of background in the course material, and being one of the students with the one of the least amounts of vet related experience was also difficult.

Still, I made it through, and have some small amount of confidence to carry through to next year, and there were others who came from a similar background to me who did not struggle as much so don't fret too much over my personal troubles.

I still stand by these "take-home" messages:
*Don't rush to apply if you can financially hold off a year. It really helps to have as much background educationally, and vet experience-wise as you can.
*Even if you struggle (as I did), that doesn't mean you can't hack it. I kicked some butt once I found my rhythm at the end of the year and felt confident doing it.
*The biggest enemy of a lot of people (myself included) at vet school is themselves. Both personally and academically. Do some inward reflection when times are tough, we create a lot of our own drama! I note particularly that some people can't stop blaming others for their problems. We all have a lot of cr*p to deal with, it is how you handle it that ultimately matters.
*Seek help when times are tough. Other students, administration, professionals, friends or family. Whatever. At worst, there is someone whose job is to help, and there is usually someone who cares.
 
StartingoverVet said:
Final update on my first year.....

I did my anatomy re-exam after 6 weeks of studying during the summer. It was STILL hard for me... But, I just found out (after coming back from overseas) that I passed it and now I am officially a second year! Took a little longer but here I am.

I also did best academically in the 4th quarter, back to grades that I am more used to.

In hindsight, I can safely say I was not ready for vet school on many levels at the beginning of the year. I had to re-learn how to cram and learn HOW to work hard efficiently. I had to deal with the fact that I was not excelling at something for one of the few times in my (long) life and I had to learn how to deal with my personal married life from a completely different perspective (not confident, not relaxed, and not having the time to commit to it), and to realize that I was the cause of a lot of the trouble.
Also, being one of the students with the least amount of background in the course material, and being one of the students with the one of the least amounts of vet related experience was also difficult.

Still, I made it through, and have some small amount of confidence to carry through to next year, and there were others who came from a similar background to me who did not struggle as much so don't fret too much over my personal troubles.

I still stand by these "take-home" messages:
*Don't rush to apply if you can financially hold off a year. It really helps to have as much background educationally, and vet experience-wise as you can.
*Even if you struggle (as I did), that doesn't mean you can't hack it. I kicked some butt once I found my rhythm at the end of the year and felt confident doing it.
*The biggest enemy of a lot of people (myself included) at vet school is themselves. Both personally and academically. Do some inward reflection when times are tough, we create a lot of our own drama! I note particularly that some people can't stop blaming others for their problems. We all have a lot of cr*p to deal with, it is how you handle it that ultimately matters.
*Seek help when times are tough. Other students, administration, professionals, friends or family. Whatever. At worst, there is someone whose job is to help, and there is usually someone who cares.
Click to expand...
Yay SOV! Excited to meet you in the August!:D
 
Congratulations SOV! This is fantastic news!

StartingoverVet said:
Also, being one of the students with the least amount of background in the course material, and being one of the students with the one of the least amounts of vet related experience was also difficult.
Click to expand...

I expect to myself be in a similar position as this in my class, and have been finding myself starting to obsessively worry about it, even though there is really nothing I can do to change it at this point! It is wonderful to hear of your ultimate success, and I really appreciate your very meaningful thoughts and suggestions. I am thinking I should go back and re-read this whole thread!

I am sure you will have continued success as a second year student!
 
StartingoverVet said:
Also, being one of the students with the least amount of background in the course material, and being one of the students with the one of the least amounts of vet related experience was also difficult.
Click to expand...

This one nags at me the most. I have a lot more experience now than I did when I applied, but I'm still daunted by how much my classmates are bringing.

Thanks for the post, SOV. I sorta feel like it's a post that I'll need to go re-read right around week ... oh, 3 or 4?
 
Congrats SOV!

Also want to say that this is a pretty fantastic thread. Depressingly honest, but I feel like I am *this* much more mentally prepared for vet school to start (in one month?! Holy crap...) than I was before I read it. At the very least, I know I'm about to get my world turned upside-down.
 
A huge accomplishment SOV! Congratulations...and enjoy your summer! Best of luck in year 2.
 
Great news, SOV!!! :claps: Way to go!
 
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