Failed first year. Getting back up is the hardest thing I have to do

[PL198]

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I have friends at DO schools and middle-tier MD schools who say the +13-15/2SD thing too.

I would have guessed an 83-85% average with SD of 5 is common at schools where passing is 70.

Yes but there are always outliers, that end up being committed when the stats are calculated, which tends to confound things. If someone goes through a traumatic event and gets 40 on an exam where avg is 80 and std dev is 8, their 40 wouldn't register in the calculations.

 

[dyspareunia]

Yes but there are always outliers, that end up being committed when the stats are calculated, which tends to confound things. If someone goes through a traumatic event and gets 40 on an exam where avg is 80 and std dev is 8, their 40 wouldn't register in the calculations.

Sure, but by definition an outlier is uncommon.

 

[Arkangeloid]

Yes but there are always outliers, that end up being committed when the stats are calculated, which tends to confound things. If someone goes through a traumatic event and gets 40 on an exam where avg is 80 and std dev is 8, their 40 wouldn't register in the calculations.

This happened once at our school so far. In Microbiology, as you might expect. Pointless class that does nothing but bring misery to med students, IMO.

 

[PL198]

Sure, but by definition an outlier is uncommon.

Yes, but in a group of 150 students there will probably be 2-4 like that. Uncommon statistically, but from a personal standpoint I wouldn't say it's uncommon. I don't think anyone is saying a significant amount of students fail(so like the stats definition), I think the sentiment is just that more people fail then the avg person thinks.

 

[colbgw02]

If I was a troll, wouldn't I have got bored about 600 posts ago?

Not if you were vying for KING TROLL OF THE UNIVERSE. Aim high, Arky. Aim high.

 

[DermViser]

Not if you were vying for KING TROLL OF THE UNIVERSE. Aim high, Arky. Aim high.

He's not vying for King Troll of the Universe, give him a break. As acerbic as even I can be, sometimes nuance is important.

I know being an attending in Purgatory can jade how we perceive things (no offense intended), but sometimes the medical world can be quite different from the student world.

 

[unexpected_medicine]

I know a person who failed a year and won the nobel peace prize and 3 gold medals and matched into plastic. I win.

huh did Al Gore go into medicine? BOOM

 

[DermViser]

I know a person who failed a year and won the nobel peace prize and 3 gold medals and matched into plastic. I win.

Uh, I'm not lying. Why you think this is somehow funny is beyond me.

 

[Priapism4tooLong]

Uh, I'm not lying. Why you think this is somehow funny is beyond me.

lol i don't think you are lying, it just seemed like there was a competition to see who knew the most successful "failure".

To be honest, i think if you pick it up after failing a year resident programs will see that. One of my close friends is doing his Surgery residency and he failed a year. He said they didn't ask him about it too much, besides a few places. But he came back and destroyed his steps.

 

[DermViser]

lol i don't think you are lying, it just seemed like there was a competition to see who knew the most successful "failure".

To be honest, i think if you pick it up after failing a year resident programs will see that. One of my close friends is doing his Surgery residency and he failed a year. He said they didn't ask him about it too much, besides a few places. But he came back and destroyed his steps.

Did he procrastinate too much at the beginning? Curious as to how he failed a year and then destroyed the Steps. Maybe he attended a top-tier medical school, where you're given some leeway?

 

[operaman]

This is a truth that will get you through many situations, including this one: nobody really cares that much about anyone else's situation. Your mom cares. Your SO may care. Your best friend may care. The rest, well, even if you tell them it will be the furthest thing from their minds within 30 minutes.

So with that said, tell or don't tell, it won't really matter. If you don't tell, odds are good nobody will even ask.

The most important thing you need to do is figure out WHY you didn't pass this year and make every effort to fix it asap. Your initial post suggests you either don't know what the problem is or are in denial about what needs to be done. Either way, talk to faculty and advisors you trust and make a plan for next year. Do NOT count on previous exposure to the material to save you because even if you make it past M1, there's still M2 and Step 1 on the horizon. If you don't make some big changes now, you'll just have to repeat again later and you don't want that.

In order of likelihood, I would consider the following as possible causes:
1) Everyone else studies much more than you think and you really need to step it up
2) You got behind early on and were playing catch up the rest of the year and didn't quite make it
3) You have issues outside of school that need resolving
4) Your study skills are woefully in adequate and you need to figure out a better way
5) You may have an undiagnosed condition that interferes with your studying
6) Do you have test anxiety that prevents you from doing your best ?

Just some things for self reflection going forward. I hope you're able to turn it around. You can definitely match into just about anything, though more competitive specialties will require a stellar performance from here on out and a good explanation for why this year went awry.

 

[dyspareunia]

This is a truth that will get you through many situations, including this one: nobody really cares that much about anyone else's situation. Your mom cares. Your SO may care. Your best friend may care. The rest, well, even if you tell them it will be the furthest thing from their minds within 30 minutes.

So with that said, tell or don't tell, it won't really matter. If you don't tell, odds are good nobody will even ask.

The most important thing you need to do is figure out WHY you didn't pass this year and make every effort to fix it asap. Your initial post suggests you either don't know what the problem is or are in denial about what needs to be done. Either way, talk to faculty and advisors you trust and make a plan for next year. Do NOT count on previous exposure to the material to save you because even if you make it past M1, there's still M2 and Step 1 on the horizon. If you don't make some big changes now, you'll just have to repeat again later and you don't want that.

In order of likelihood, I would consider the following as possible causes:
1) Everyone else studies much more than you think and you really need to step it up
2) You got behind early on and were playing catch up the rest of the year and didn't quite make it
3) You have issues outside of school that need resolving
4) Your study skills are woefully in adequate and you need to figure out a better way
5) You may have an undiagnosed condition that interferes with your studying
6) Do you have test anxiety that prevents you from doing your best ?

Just some things for self reflection going forward. I hope you're able to turn it around. You can definitely match into just about anything, though more competitive specialties will require a stellar performance from here on out and a good explanation for why this year went awry.

I know you mean well, but the only thing med students care about more than their grades is the grades of their classmates. Hence the constant advice to "only worry about yourself and not everyone else".

 

[Brain Bucket]

I know you mean well, but the only thing med students care about more than their grades is the grades of their classmates. Hence the constant advice to "only worry about yourself and not everyone else".

Usually only true for the first couple of months. Now the only people who are looking at others' grades are those who are struggling.

 

[Arkangeloid]

Usually only true for the first couple of months. Now the only people who are looking at others' grades are those who are struggling.

I find it's the opposite at our school. The people at the bottom (like me) have given up looking at other people's grades. The people who are super neurotic about grades, and fight with the professor to get questions thrown out (while other's fight to keep them on the exam so it would boost their position) are the people in the 2nd and 1st quartiles fighting to stay at the top.

 

[Brain Bucket]

I find it's the opposite at our school. The people at the bottom (like me) have given up looking at other people's grades. The people who are super neurotic about grades, and fight with the professor to get questions thrown out (while other's fight to keep them on the exam so it would boost their position) are the people in the 2nd and 1st quartiles fighting to stay at the top.

Ah. The consistent top 3 scorers in my class are (according to me) pretty cool people. It's the ones who're usually ranked 4-10 who are pretty neurotic, but even they don't go around snooping at other people's grades.

 

[dyspareunia]

Usually only true for the first couple of months. Now the only people who are looking at others' grades are those who are struggling.

This isn't the case at my school. People are still very much interested in what other people are doing.

 

[Brain Bucket]

Wow. That's...sad.

 

[DermViser]

Ah. The consistent top 3 scorers in my class are (according to me) pretty cool people. It's the ones who're usually ranked 4-10 who are pretty neurotic, but even they don't go around snooping at other people's grades.

It's not snooping if the grades are posted. They're right freakin' there.

 

[Anastomoses]

Ah. The consistent top 3 scorers in my class are (according to me) pretty cool people. It's the ones who're usually ranked 4-10 who are pretty neurotic, but even they don't go around snooping at other people's grades.

I can be a little eerie. There was a classmate in first semester of M1. Very pretty tall lithe girl whose talent for memorization perhaps came out best in anatomy. I developed a small neurosis about her and would particularly check her scores post-exams. I liked how it made me feel - made me work harder. Unfortunately she wasn't particularly gifted in any other classes so I lost interest.

 

[Brain Bucket]

It's not snooping if the grades are posted. They're right freakin' there.

Eh, not exactly. It varies by course now. They used to just post a list with the name and score in order of rank (anatomy). Some students complained, and now we've been assigned numbers (randomized). The internal exam grades are still posted as a list (but with assigned numbers), but the NBMEs aren't. Those only go out with the median, mean, highest, and lowest scores.

I can be a little eerie. There was a classmate in first semester of M1. Very pretty tall lithe girl whose talent for memorization perhaps came out best in anatomy. I developed a small neurosis about her and would particularly check her scores post-exams. I liked how it made me feel - made me work harder. Unfortunately she wasn't particularly gifted in any other classes so I lost interest.

I don't particularly care about my classmates' scores. I do, however, really care about my percentile on the shelves. I use that to motivate myself.

 

[Arkangeloid]

I can be a little eerie. There was a classmate in first semester of M1. Very pretty tall lithe girl whose talent for memorization perhaps came out best in anatomy. I developed a small neurosis about her and would particularly check her scores post-exams. I liked how it made me feel - made me work harder. Unfortunately she wasn't particularly gifted in any other classes so I lost interest.

Sounds like you were jelly. 🙂

 

[DermViser]

I can be a little eerie. There was a classmate in first semester of M1. Very pretty tall lithe girl whose talent for memorization perhaps came out best in anatomy. I developed a small neurosis about her and would particularly check her scores post-exams. I liked how it made me feel - made me work harder. Unfortunately she wasn't particularly gifted in any other classes so I lost interest.

God, you're such a weirdo.

 

[Arkangeloid]

Not gonna lie though, it kinda makes me feel a bit crappy when I see cute girls or buff dudes beasting ish. I start to wonder: why did God put me here when he can make people who are better than me at everything?

 

[Brain Bucket]

Not gonna lie though, it kinda makes me feel a bit crappy when I see cute girls or buff dudes beasting ish. I start to wonder: why did God put me here when he can make people who are better than me at everything?

 

[Siggy]

Eh, not exactly. It varies by course now. They used to just post a list with the name and score in order of rank (anatomy). Some students complained, and now we've been assigned numbers (randomized).

To be fair, posting names and grades like that without a wavier does constitute a FERPA violation.

 

[Anastomoses]

Sounds like you were jelly. 🙂

Actually jealousy is a slightly normal emotion. This is different...kind of creepier than jealousy. I like finding girls I perceive as absolute perfection in beauty, intelligence, grace...and both befriending them and slurping their souls. Very difficult to find the type, though. I tried with this one but she wasn't up to the mark.

I'm still pretty good friends with the two I found in grade school and high school.

God, you're such a weirdo.

Sure. But which part?

 

[Anastomoses]

Not gonna lie though, it kinda makes me feel a bit crappy when I see cute girls or buff dudes beasting ish. I start to wonder: why did God put me here when he can make people who are better than me at everything?

You do realize that you have problems with relativity, right? I think I mentioned this story before - my cousin and I were shopping for his shoes and at register there was a...clerk whose appearance was painfully bad despite having a polite demeanor and well, she's a shoe store clerk in her mid-thirties. Without exchanging any comments, my cousin says [what translates to] "God blesses some with everything and others he sucker-punches in the groin". Are things really so bad for you? You're tall, healthy, have your loved ones. Have an attractive assortion of mail order bride waiting in India. You have most things on a platter. If you have even 1000$ in your bank acct you're among the richest 10% on the planet. Are you going to start correcting your psychological fallacies anytime soon?

 

[DermViser]

Actually jealousy is a slightly normal emotion. This is different...kind of creepier than jealousy. I like finding girls I perceive as absolute perfection in beauty, intelligence, grace...and both befriending them and slurping their souls.

Add this to the list of Anastomoses goldmine quotes.

 

[DermViser]

Not gonna lie though, it kinda makes me feel a bit crappy when I see cute girls or buff dudes beasting ish. I start to wonder: why did God put me here when he can make people who are better than me at everything?

The way you are perceiving and interpreting things around you is a little off. You think it's reality but it's really not. You shouldn't be defining yourself based on other people (esp. since you're wrong in how you interpret their lives).

 

[Arkangeloid]

You do realize that you have problems with relativity, right? I think I mentioned this story before - my cousin and I were shopping for his shoes and at register there was a...clerk whose appearance was painfully bad despite having a polite demeanor and well, she's a shoe store clerk in her mid-thirties. Without exchanging any comments, my cousin says [what translates to] "God blesses some with everything and others he sucker-punches in the groin". Are things really so bad for you? You're tall, healthy, have your loved ones. Have an attractive assortion of mail order bride waiting in India. You have most things on a platter. If you have even 1000$ in your bank acct you're among the richest 10% on the planet. Are you going to start correcting your psychological fallacies anytime soon?

Goddamnit, you're right lol. Thanks.

I'm astonished that you haven't given up on me by now. I think DermViser was right about you. 🙂

 

[DermViser]

Goddamnit, you're right lol. Thanks. I'm astonished that you haven't given up on me by now. I think DermViser was right about you. 🙂

Sometimes I think @Anastomoses should punch you. Might knock some sense into you everytime you revert back.

 

[Plecopotamus]

How do I tell my friends that I failed? I don't want to be labeled by my classmates and professors as the girl who was forced to repeat first year. I think my close friends would understand but what do I do if I run into other friends from my previous class when I am back on campus for first year work?

How do I tell my new classmates that I am forced to repeat first year?

I am grateful for the opportunity to repeat, but I am worried I am going to be a loner for the next 4 years because most kids in medical school will not want to associate with the kid who failed a year. I screwed up. I never had any trouble academically in my life, and this is severely hurting my self image.

While I would not say it is the most common thing to do, there are certainly people who take a year off before coming back to repeat the year b/c they have this concern of stigma.

I don't know where your school is in its academic year, but if you're not done with the year, is it possible to tell your classmates you're withdrawing for personal reasons right now rather than telling them you are being compelled to repeat?

 

[dyspareunia]

Wow. That's...sad.

Why? Until residency interviews come around we are really only competing with our classmates. Everyone in my class stands between me and AOA, just like everyone on the interview trail stands between me and a job.

I don't think it's sad to want to know what your competition is doing.

Maybe I feel this way because I don't buy into the whole need for classmates to succeed thing. Nobody can help me on exams and certainly nobody can help me on step 1. Be friendly, helpful, and kind to your classmates, but don't forget for even a second that they could be what prevents you from reaching certain goals.

 

[ChEMD]

Why? Until residency interviews come around we are really only competing with our classmates. Everyone in my class stands between me and AOA, just like everyone on the interview trail stands between me and a job.

I don't think it's sad to want to know what your competition is doing.

Wanting to know where you stand in the class is one thing. Actively trying to find out how individual people in your class are doing in order to know how you stack up is a whole different thing (not saying that you necessarily do that).

 

[dyspareunia]

Wanting to know where you stand in the class is one thing. Actively trying to find out how individual people in your class are doing in order to know how you stack up is a whole different thing (not saying that you necessarily do that).

I agree. I was saying that people are still curious and still talk amongst themselves about other people's grades.

I was originally pointing out that med students do care how other med students are doing.

 

[Brain Bucket]

Why? Until residency interviews come around we are really only competing with our classmates. Everyone in my class stands between me and AOA, just like everyone on the interview trail stands between me and a job.

I don't think it's sad to want to know what your competition is doing.

Maybe I feel this way because I don't buy into the whole need for classmates to succeed thing. Nobody can help me on exams and certainly nobody can help me on step 1. Be friendly, helpful, and kind to your classmates, but don't forget for even a second that they could be what prevents you from reaching certain goals.

It's sad because we spend so much of our time under so much stress, why add to it voluntarily when there is no real benefit?

I don't agree about the competition bit. You really aren't competing with each other (except for AOA) Everyone knows what's required for each of the residencies, all this (mentality) does is propagate misinformation and inflate neuroses. It would be far better for us, if we, as a class, pooled resources and helped each other, but I expect that's asking for too much. Once I'm a physician I'd much rather have a network of peers who I trust (to a degree) and who might have my back, than the alternative.

 

[Anastomoses]

I don't agree about the competition bit. You really aren't competing with each other (except for AOA) Everyone knows what's required for each of the residencies, all this (mentality) does is propagate misinformation and inflate neuroses. It would be far better for us, if we, as a class, pooled resources and helped each other, but I expect that's asking for too much. Once I'm a physician I'd much rather have a network of peers who I trust (to a degree) and who might have my back, than the alternative.

Agree with this. The network built in med school is very cool if you can get it. There are sincere people and a couple who have grown to love me and I them, despite not expecting it.

All things being equal, I'd rather have a class of people who all score 245+ on Steps than to be the only one with high marks/scores.

 

[DermViser]

Why? Until residency interviews come around we are really only competing with our classmates. Everyone in my class stands between me and AOA, just like everyone on the interview trail stands between me and a job.

I don't think it's sad to want to know what your competition is doing.

Maybe I feel this way because I don't buy into the whole need for classmates to succeed thing. Nobody can help me on exams and certainly nobody can help me on step 1. Be friendly, helpful, and kind to your classmates, but don't forget for even a second that they could be what prevents you from reaching certain goals.

Keep up this attitude, and I can't wait to see how you perform on the wards on MS-3. You will be "that guy". Your thinking is very warped if this is your attitude and will destroy you.

 

[DermViser]

Agree with this. The network built in med school is very cool if you can get it. There are sincere people and a couple who have grown to love me and I them, despite not expecting it.

All things being equal, I'd rather have a class of people who all score 245+ on Steps than to be the only one with high marks/scores.

This is mathematically impossible for every single person in the class to be one standard deviation above the mean on a standardized exam.

 

[NontradCA]

What if Ark was MedPR. @touchpause13

 

[failed29]

Thanks for the advice y'all! I have to start up with my new class on Aug 4th. In the meantime, I will try to think positively!

 

[dyspareunia]

Keep up this attitude, and I can't wait to see how you perform on the wards on MS-3. You will be "that guy". Your thinking is very warped if this is your attitude and will destroy you.

I don't see why it's wrong to approach med school as an individual not dependent on his peers. Preclinicals aren't designed to foster teamwork (outside of TBL/PBL).

When the team setting is presented I do very well (peer evals and facilitator evals), but when it's time to perform on an exam I can't and don't rely on anyone but myself.

I also don't see why people think if someone approaches preclinicals a certain way then they are doomed to approach clerkships exactly the same way. Adapting to your surroundings must not be something you're familiar with?

 

[WillburCobb]

What if Ark was MedPR. @touchpause13

He'd be doing a HELL of a job hiding his personality if that were the case. None the less I'm sure he's here somewhere.

 

[dyspareunia]

It's sad because we spend so much of our time under so much stress, why add to it voluntarily when there is no real benefit?

I don't agree about the competition bit. You really aren't competing with each other (except for AOA) Everyone knows what's required for each of the residencies, all this (mentality) does is propagate misinformation and inflate neuroses. It would be far better for us, if we, as a class, pooled resources and helped each other, but I expect that's asking for too much. Once I'm a physician I'd much rather have a network of peers who I trust (to a degree) and who might have my back, than the alternative.

I would much rather have a network of trusted peers as well. Preclinical years are nothing like being a physician though. You can call and ask for advice from a physician colleague. I can't text my friends during an exam and ask them for their opinion.

 

[DermViser]

I don't see why it's wrong to approach med school as an individual not dependent on his peers. Preclinicals aren't designed to foster teamwork (outside of TBL/PBL).

When the team setting is presented I do very well (peer evals and facilitator evals), but when it's time to perform on an exam I can't and don't rely on anyone but myself.

I also don't see why people think if someone approaches preclinicals a certain way then they are doomed to approach clerkships exactly the same way. Adapting to your surroundings must not be something you're familiar with?

Like I said, you'll see soon enough how MS-3 is very much different from MS-1/MS-2. Your gunnerism in believing you're competing against everyone else in your class will backfire.

 

[DrEnderW]

Your gunnerism in believing you're competing against everyone else in your class will backfire.

"Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will." - Yoda

First thing that came to my mind...

 

[evilbooyaa]

Goddamnit, you're right lol. Thanks.

I'm astonished that you haven't given up on me by now. I think DermViser was right about you. 🙂

I think Anasto needs to have pity sex with Ark. It'll be faster for you guys in boosting his self-esteem than words ever will.

As to the OP - I would focus more on figuring out WHY you failed, not what your classmates are going to think about it. Based off your responses in this thread, you either have not figured out what you need to change to not fail again (if not MS1 again, then MS2 and the rest of medical school), or you don't want to disclose the particulars about what you're going to change (this option is fine, the former is NOT).

People who have to repeat the year aren't generally "surprised" by it. If a year of underwhelming performance in medical school doesn't get your butt into gear, then you need to seek out help (tutors, other academic support) so that you stop your bad habits (or figure out what other issues you have that are stopping you from passing).

I would start with these 6 options from operaman

In order of likelihood, I would consider the following as possible causes:
1) Everyone else studies much more than you think and you really need to step it up
2) You got behind early on and were playing catch up the rest of the year and didn't quite make it
3) You have issues outside of school that need resolving
4) Your study skills are woefully in adequate and you need to figure out a better way
5) You may have an undiagnosed condition that interferes with your studying
6) Do you have test anxiety that prevents you from doing your best ?

 

[Brain Bucket]

Thanks for the advice y'all! I have to start up with my new class on Aug 4th. In the meantime, I will try to think positively!

Yeah, sorry about the tangent. Take operaman's advice, and you'll be golden.

 

[operaman]

Unless you are going into primary care/ED/Path/Rads, remember that your classmates will ultimately be the people who refer patients to you. After 8 weeks of M1 I already knew some classmates I would never ever refer a patient to; after 3rd year that list has only grown, along with the list of people I WOULD refer to. My guess is that everyone here can say the same.

Now, all you have to do is duck into a physicians lounge in any hospital in America and you'll hear at least one person whining about not getting enough referrals. Many things can be causing this, but my guess is the attitude component of it may have started/been present even back in medical school. Some might say they plan to be more collegial after med school, but I have trouble believing that. Other would argue they don't plan to practice near their med school, but word of mouth can be powerful and travel where you never expected.

Competition is great, but do try and lift up your classmates as well whenever you can even if it's not a scheduled/evaluated team activity. Share your resources and help those who struggle. It will only help in the long run.

 

[dyspareunia]

Like I said, you'll see soon enough how MS-3 is very much different from MS-1/MS-2. Your gunnerism in believing you're competing against everyone else in your class will backfire.

I know MS3 is very different, which is why I don't plan to approach it the same way I have approached MS1. I'll let you know in a year and some change how my first clerkship is going 🙂