Feeling homesick?

[serimeri]

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I'm moving away for residency from my parents and my little siblings. It's been a rollercoaster these past few years as we've been through a lot with the loss of loved ones and health issues. As happy as I am to start this next chapter, a part of me just wants things to be a standstill and hit the "pause" button permanently so I can watch them grow up. I'm starting Psych residency in a busy place and its 2 hours time difference from where we are at, so I 'm hoping it will be busy enough that I won't notice it. But does anyone have any tips on how to cope with nostalgia and how to get over these feelings of obligation, being away form ones loved ones?

Literally stayed home for college and most of med school. My fondest memories are being able to tuck my little brother at night after a night at the library and catching up after work with my mom over a hot meal. I guess this is part of life, but I really feel jealous of some of my PA and NP friends who don't have to deal with another 4 years of training.

Any tips or suggestions from those who've been through it before? I think I'm just being a bit emotional with my impending move and I just hate moving in general.

 

[shopsteward]

Not sure how you know you hate moving if you've never really done it.

It's going to be all in your attitude: you are going on an awfully big adventure and need to view it as such.

Your family back home will love to have letters, postcards and skypes from you.

 

[j4pac]

Invest in technology. It's not the same as being there with the person, but it's much better than before.

Surround yourself with good people and non-medical related activities. Depression is HIGHLY underdiagnosed amongst medical professionals. Find a balance in life and it will help. And never be afraid to get help if you need it. Too many residents wait until it is too late to try to get help...don't be too proud.

Good luck!

 

[so721]

Invest in technology. It's not the same as being there with the person, but it's much better than before.

Surround yourself with good people and non-medical related activities. Depression is HIGHLY underdiagnosed amongst medical professionals. Find a balance in life and it will help. And never be afraid to get help if you need it. Too many residents wait until it is too late to try to get help...don't be too proud.

Good luck!

The reason people wait to get help is because its difficult to remain annonymous when doing so....your program may find out and use it against you.

But I agree try & do skype whenever you can.

 

[ThoracicGuy]

The reason people wait to get help is because its difficult to remain annonymous when doing so....your program may find out and use it against you.

But I agree try & do skype whenever you can.

If you see someone outside of your residency hospital, then it would be pretty easy to stay anonymous. Seeing someone in the hospital should be anonymous as well, though you would have a higher risk there.

 

[brotherman]

All depends on your attitude towards the change, as well as your support system in your residency program. Definitely encourage to hang out with residents from your program whenever possible, believe me it makes all the difference in making the 4 years bearable.

 

[22031 Alum]

People who are used to the "professional" world sometimes take moving around for granted. But many many people live their whole lives not too far from where they grew up. Think of this as a huge opportunity, first to strike out on your own for the first time, and second to learn about (and maybe love) a new place. Making time for activities separate from work AND from family will help. Spending all your free time Skyping, and all your free weekends at home, doesn't count.

 

[serimeri]

I actually did move for med school but had a lot of breaks and my med school was only 5 hours from home.

It just seems so final, moving away for 4 years, with the occasional breaks. I'm going to miss out on being there to watch my little brother grow up.

But I need to get out of my shell too and try and hang out with my peers a little more, to counteract that nostalgia. Plus, my dad telling me that how he wished I had matched nearby doesn't help matters much. I really feel fortunate to be a part of a group who is very mature and luckily have cute kids as well so I don't miss my brother that much.

 

[deleted497653]

I too moved for residency several states away and to a place that had a much different climate and culture from where I had done medical school and where my family was. Try to be positive and as others said, view it as an adventure. You may like the new place to your surprise. Time will tell. Try to focus on the positive, you have a job and a new opportunity. You cannot change where you matched so just go with it.

4 years is a long time but not that long in the grand scheme. By the way, your family probably doesn't understand that the match is hard to predict. I always say, it is hard for people outside of medicine to really understand what we go through as far as the rigor of med school, the match and the whole other nine yards.

Just travel home on your vacation days. It will be expensive/time consuming but worth it (and sometimes a great stress relief).