Having a Baby during Medical School

[Semper-fi]

I've done quite a bit of research on when's the best time to have a baby in your medical training and the most common responses are; first and second year; not during third year; fourth year; not during intern year; after intern year; after residency.

I'm going to be an incoming student (Class of 2023, woohoo!) and would like to deliver during summer between first and second year because of all the flexibility offered during this time in my training. Any thoughts, comments, questions, concerns, tips? I want to make sure I make as informed of a decision as I can.

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[wanderingorion]

My wife had our son at the tail-end of my first year. I think it's the best time, as your schedule is much more flexible during 2nd year compared to 3rd.
But, given I'm am the male in this case, Idk if my experience will be useful for you. But having our little boy in med school has been the best decision we made.

 

[Semper-fi]

My wife had our son at the tail-end of my first year. I think it's the best time, as your schedule is much more flexible during 2nd year compared to 3rd.
But, given I'm am the male in this case, Idk if my experience will be useful for you. But having our little boy in med school has been the best decision we made.

Good to know! Children are a blessing and i’m Glad that as a parent you feel like you made a good choice at the right time

 

[M&L]

i asked this question before, - and one of the medical students who has kids told me that she believes that the best time is second year after the Step 1, or between 3rd and 4th year. She said that 3rd year is also doable, because a lot of schools can actually move stuff for you in this case. But she told me no matter what i do to not have a baby before step 1, so that i can focus on that. But of course, this is just one person opinion (i am female, if that matters).

 

[Tenk]

The best decision as a woman is to wait until residency. This will provide you with the best possible condition for matching your top choice both in specialty and location and you will have more time to spend with the child as by the time you deliver you will be a PGY-2 or 3. Having a child in the first two years is ridiculously hard. There were a few women in my class who did this and honestly they looked like hell every time I saw them. If you decide to breast feed you will be waking up every 3-4 hours to pump/feed every single night for several months so keep that in mind as well.

 

[ciestar]

i asked this question before, - and one of the medical students who has kids told me that she believes that the best time is second year after the Step 1, or between 3rd and 4th year. She said that 3rd year is also doable, because a lot of schools can actually move stuff for you in this case. But she told me no matter what i do to not have a baby before step 1, so that i can focus on that. But of course, this is just one person opinion (i am female, if that matters).

For a lot of schools, do NOT have a kid after step 1. This is typically before third year and I can say for certain you should NOT have a baby third year. This is a bad idea and would likely lead you to a LOA since MS3 is so demanding. Tail end of first year or early second year could work, just make sure you’re not pregnant during dedicated or close to delivery at that time. MS4 is the best time to do it in med school. Just dont be visibly pregnant at your interviews. I would advise against putting yourself in a position to deliver in the summer before interviews, because this is precious time for aways if you need them. Do not do it during intern year. PGY-2 and beyond is better. The best time is when you’re an attending, but if you’re like me, I will be almost 34 when i finish residency and I’d rather not wait that long.

 

[M&L]

For a lot of schools, do NOT have a kid after step 1. This is typically before third year and I can say for certain you should NOT have a baby third year. This is a bad idea and would likely lead you to a LOA since MS3 is so demanding. Tail end of first year or early second year could work, just make sure you’re not pregnant during dedicated or close to delivery at that time. MS4 is the best time to do it in med school. Just dont be visibly pregnant at your interviews. I would advise against putting yourself in a position to deliver in the summer before interviews, because this is precious time for aways if you need them. Do not do it during intern year. PGY-2 and beyond is better. The best time is when you’re an attending, but if you’re like me, I will be almost 34 when i finish residency and I’d rather not wait that long.

yeah this is tough. I will be 37 when i finish medical school. I decided to not have a child during medical school, and try to do it during residency. I just really dont think it will be a good option for me, since i have no family here.

 

[mehc012]

The best decision as a woman is to wait until residency. This will provide you with the best possible condition for matching your top choice both in specialty and location and you will have more time to spend with the child as by the time you deliver you will be a PGY-2 or 3. Having a child in the first two years is ridiculously hard. There were a few women in my class who did this and honestly they looked like hell every time I saw them. If you decide to breast feed you will be waking up every 3-4 hours to pump/feed every single night for several months so keep that in mind as well.

Depends on your class setup. If you don't have to go to the physical school every day, it's easier.
Our school, for M2, required only 3d/wk of 10am-noon PBL, with occasional (no more than 1x/wk) afternoon sessions that were mandatory. Exams were only every few months and were true pass/fail, so there was a lot of flexibility to it.

My point being, OP...now that you know what your school setup is like, evaluate based on that, not what people on the internet who dont know your schedule would say.

 

[Tenk]

Depends on your class setup. If you don't have to go to the physical school every day, it's easier.
Our school, for M2, required only 3d/wk of 10am-noon PBL, with occasional (no more than 1x/wk) afternoon sessions that were mandatory. Exams were only every few months and were true pass/fail, so there was a lot of flexibility to it.

My point being, OP...now that you know what your school setup is like, evaluate based on that, not what people on the internet who dont know your schedule would say.

Umm no. Having a child makes absolutely nothing easier other than your ability to fall asleep at any time. Having a child during the first two years is almost guaranteed to lower your step one score. If I would have had a child during my first two years there is absolutely no way I would have scored as high as I did on step one which could have adversely affected my ability to match emergency medicine.

Medical school is literally just a process of getting into residency. You want the best possible match not just for yourself but for your family as well. This is to ensure you have the best career path as your specialty will determine your next 20-30 years and there can be a difference in milllions of dollars over that time. I have kids now and I only want to provide them with the best possible life and opportunities to succeed. Therefore I feel it is best to wait until you match to ensure the best possible future not only for yourself but for your future family as well. In addition why have kids if you can’t spend time with them?

Also, the schedule for MS1 and MS2 is the same at every medical school: STUDY.

 

[mehc012]

Umm no. Having a child makes absolutely nothing easier other than your ability to fall asleep at any time. Having a child during the first two years is almost guaranteed to lower your step one score. If I would have had a child during my first two years there is absolutely no way I would have scored as high as I did on step one which could have adversely affected my ability to match emergency medicine.

Medical school is literally just a process of getting into residency. You want the best possible match not just for yourself but for your family as well. This is to ensure you have the best career path as your specialty will determine your next 20-30 years and there can be a difference in milllions of dollars over that time. I have kids now and I only want to provide them with the best possible life and opportunities to succeed. Therefore I feel it is best to wait until you match to ensure the best possible future not only for yourself but for your future family as well. In addition why have kids if you can’t spend time with them?

Also, the schedule for MS1 and MS2 is the same at every medical school: STUDY.

I didn't say having a child made anything easier.
I said that having a flexible schedule makes having a child easier.

Also, SDN greatly overstates how much time needs to be put in during MS1 and MS2. You seem to have bought into the "med school is so hard, you can't do anything but study" nonsense that this board is full of. I'm glad you did well, but that's not the only way to do so.

I disagree with you about the 'guaranteed to lower your step one score" part...vehemently and wholeheartedly disagree. And, as someone who was raised by a single mom putting herself through higher education (and rocking it along the way)...you can make it work, if it's what you want.

 

[M&L]

I didn't say having a child made anything easier.
I said that having a flexible schedule makes having a child easier.

Also, SDN greatly overstates how much time needs to be put in during MS1 and MS2. You seem to have bought into the "med school is so hard, you can't do anything but study" nonsense that this board is full of. I'm glad you did well, but that's not the only way to do so.

I disagree with you about the 'guaranteed to lower your step one score" part...vehemently and wholeheartedly disagree. And, as someone who was raised by a single mom putting herself through higher education (and rocking it along the way)...you can make it work, if it's what you want.

I see your point ...
@Tenk is FACULTY. So in a way that makes Tenk qualified to comment on how things often work out

 

[mehc012]

I see your point ...
@Tenk is FACULTY. So in a way that makes Tenk qualified to comment on how things often work out

No, it really doesn't. It means that Tenk did M1/M2 exactly as many times as I have, with experience at one school.

 

[M&L]

No, it really doesn't. It means that Tenk did M1/M2 exactly as many times as I have, with experience at one school.

Yeah , true . But it means that Tenk saw more students go through it.

 

[ArmCandy]

We didn't plan ours, 2nd year and then again in 3rd year(oops). We were at the medical school close to family so their support made things a little easier and I could still work. Some programs are more forgiving than others. We had to do a prelim year to eventually match into general surgery. I'm not sure how much the kids played a detrimental role on her scores, I imagine they did though. It worked out shes private practice, acute, trauma, and bread and butter, surgeon. Director of SICU, and after this year will be Director of Trauma. Teaches surgery for two med schools and is pretty darn happy.

My wife said if we would have planned them it would've been 2nd year med school second year surgical residency. 1st year is an adjustment in both med school and residency.

That being said she has had co-residents in her program get pregnant while doing a gen surg preliminary year and still matched in gen surg. Then going on to match into plastics this year. Another co-resident did a research year (or maybe 2??) after PGY3 and had a child then. She recently matched ped-surg at Brown.

As tough as it makes it, I would do it again. My wife wanted more during surgical residency but I said no. Now that we are out, I regret that a lot.

 

[M&L]

I feel like this is one of those times when there is no right or wrong . It all depends on how much you can handle , and how much support you have . I know that I cannot handle it , since I have NO support at all .

 

[Tenk]

This person wasn't saying that having a child made it easier, they were saying that it's easier to have a child if you don't physically have to show up at school. It is stupid to advise people to hold off on kids until they match since every person and situation is different. By the way, we had our first kid during the first two years of med school and I managed to stay in the top 2% of my class and get a step score >260. You're advising people to hold off on a major life decision (and one that brings a lot of happiness, honestly) because you wouldn't have been intelligent enough to swing it.

Cool. How much time did you spend with your child during the first few years of its life? You don’t need need to answer as I already know.

 

[Tenk]

I feel like this is one of those times when there is no right or wrong . It all depends on how much you can handle , and how much support you have . I know that I cannot handle it , since I have NO support at all .

You are correct. As you can see this is an area of passion and fire. If you look at it objectively though no matter when you have a child it will make it harder and as a mother you will need tons of familial support. Being a guy is a lot easier really “sorry! Gotta study! Sorry! Gotta take a test! Sorry! Gotta work!”

 

[mehc012]

Cool. How much time did you spend with your child during the first few years of its life? You don’t need need to answer as I already know.

See, this is just unnecessary.

 

[Tenk]

I didn't say having a child made anything easier.
I said that having a flexible schedule makes having a child easier.

Also, SDN greatly overstates how much time needs to be put in during MS1 and MS2. You seem to have bought into the "med school is so hard, you can't do anything but study" nonsense that this board is full of. I'm glad you did well, but that's not the only way to do so.

I disagree with you about the 'guaranteed to lower your step one score" part...vehemently and wholeheartedly disagree. And, as someone who was raised by a single mom putting herself through higher education (and rocking it along the way)...you can make it work, if it's what you want.

Time is finite. You cannot argue this. It is science. In the day you have 24 hours. The way you spend this time will be different for everyone. In order to spend time with a child, you will have to take time away from something else. Therefore to achieve your maximum step score you would have to spend almost no time with your child for months. It’s honestly not a difficult concept, can’t really figure out why you are arguing against it.

 

[Tenk]

See, this is just unnecessary.

As was their insult. My post just proves the point of something she isn’t mentioning: sacrificing time with their child for their career.

 

[mehc012]

As was their insult. My post just proves the point of something she isn’t mentioning: sacrificing time with their child for their career.

You're right; their insult was out of line, too, and I overlooked that.
You've proven nothing, however, except that you have an irrational fixed belief that to succeed in medicine, you must sacrifice all of your time to studying for months on end.

Time is finite. You cannot argue this. It is science. In the day you have 24 hours. The way you spend this time will be different for everyone. In order to spend time with a child, you will have to take time away from something else. Therefore to achieve your maximum step score you would have to spend almost no time with your child for months. It’s honestly not a difficult concept, can’t really figure out why you are arguing against it.

Because I think it's insane to pretend that people need to spend 24/7 Step studying for months in order to score well.

 

[Tenk]

You're right; their insult was out of line, too, and I overlooked that.
You've proven nothing, however, except that you have an irrational fixed belief that to succeed in medicine, you must sacrifice all of your time to studying for months on end.

Because I think it's insane to pretend that people need to spend 24/7 Step studying for months in order to score well.

Not one post did I say you need to spend all your time studying. Instead I tried to explain it more as a balancing act. You have to balance personal, social, family, personal health and school. Throw a kid (or two) in there and you now have more to balance. In no way is this not possible as I know plenty of women who have done great but it is much harder than not having kids.

To put it another way: let’s say you’re Dr Strange and you can see all the possible outcomes of entering medical school. On one extreme you study none and on the other side you study literally every possible moment you can. Neither of these two are good. Somewhere in the middle is the sweet spot. That is the spot where you will do YOUR best. I emphasize your because your sweet spot will be different from someone else’s. I guarantee you though that that sweet spot will include a lot of studying. It won’t be 24/7 studying for two years because you’re right, that makes you go crazy but it will be a lot. Studying takes time. Kids take just as much time. It’s simple math really...

Something I forgot to mention that is actually a super important reason most women wait to have kids until residency is that you also get FMLA, sick time and vacation time that you can stack. Not only will you get time off work to spend with your child without having to make up a lot of it, but you get paid for it too. When my twins were born I took three months off work because I am an attending and I can do that. I didn’t have to worry about school, tests, making up the time or anything. I just helped my wife (who is the same age as me) and got to spend time with my babies. It’s amazing. One of my female partners did the same thing around the same time only she got more money than I did because women can tack on disability insurance as well. We actually went to residency together and we were talking about how much easier it was for her to have kids at our current job than in residency as she also had a child during PGY-3.

There are clear advantages and disadvantages to when you have your kids. In my opinion (mine, not yours) attending > residency > medical school. Obviously, fertility can play a role in this and it is something to consider as a disadvantage depending on your age. The 5 main things I think any woman in medical school should consider when planning to have kids in no particular order are:

1) social support (huge)
2) finances (kids ain’t cheap!)
3) step one/specialty choice (family practice will be different than neurosurgery)
4) free time (this is something you get a lot more of as you progress)
5) age (this is also something you get a lot more of as you progress and it sucks!)

The longer you wait, the less these things matter except #5. Good luck to all my female colleagues. You have a much harder job than I do. You have to deal with being a mother, a physician and a lot of times patients will think you are a damn nurse which always pisses me off. I actually am just trying to provide advice based on my personal experience as well as the numerous female colleagues I have known who had children at various times during their careers. So figure out what works for you but know that there is no perfect answer and each choice has pluses and minuses.

 

[M&L]

Not one post did I say you need to spend all your time studying. Instead I tried to explain it more as a balancing act. You have to balance personal, social, family, personal health and school. Throw a kid (or two) in there and you now have more to balance. In no way is this not possible as I know plenty of women who have done great but it is much harder than not having kids.

To put it another way: let’s say you’re Dr Strange and you can see all the possible outcomes of entering medical school. On one extreme you study none and on the other side you study literally every possible moment you can. Neither of these two are good. Somewhere in the middle is the sweet spot. That is the spot where you will do YOUR best. I emphasize your because your sweet spot will be different from someone else’s. I guarantee you though that that sweet spot will include a lot of studying. It won’t be 24/7 studying for two years because you’re right, that makes you go crazy but it will be a lot. Studying takes time. Kids take just as much time. It’s simple math really...

Something I forgot to mention that is actually a super important reason most women wait to have kids until residency is that you also get FMLA, sick time and vacation time that you can stack. Not only will you get time off work to spend with your child without having to make up a lot of it, but you get paid for it too. When my twins were born I took three months off work because I am an attending and I can do that. I didn’t have to worry about school, tests, making up the time or anything. I just helped my wife (who is the same age as me) and got to spend time with my babies. It’s amazing. One of my female partners did the same thing around the same time only she got more money than I did because women can tack on disability insurance as well. We actually went to residency together and we were talking about how much easier it was for her to have kids at our current job than in residency as she also had a child during PGY-3.

There are clear advantages and disadvantages to when you have your kids. In my opinion (mine, not yours) attending > residency > medical school. Obviously, fertility can play a role in this and it is something to consider as a disadvantage depending on your age. The 5 main things I think any woman in medical school should consider when planning to have kids in no particular order are:

1) social support (huge)
2) finances (kids ain’t cheap!)
3) step one/specialty choice (family practice will be different than neurosurgery)
4) free time (this is something you get a lot more of as you progress)
5) age (this is also something you get a lot more of as you progress and it sucks!)

The longer you wait, the less these things matter except #5. Good luck to all my female colleagues. You have a much harder job than I do. You have to deal with being a mother, a physician and a lot of times patients will think you are a damn nurse which always pisses me off. I actually am just trying to provide advice based on my personal experience as well as the numerous female colleagues I have known who had children at various times during their careers. So figure out what works for you but know that there is no perfect answer and each choice has pluses and minuses.

i definitely agree with you. I am concerned about part 5 personally, since i will be 37 yo when i graduate medical school. I am not married though.. honestly, i am sort of considering looking into freezing my eggs )

 

[mehc012]

Not one post did I say you need to spend all your time studying. Instead I tried to explain it more as a balancing act. You have to balance personal, social, family, personal health and school. Throw a kid (or two) in there and you now have more to balance. In no way is this not possible as I know plenty of women who have done great but it is much harder than not having kids.

If this had been what you were saying from the beginning, we wouldn't have been in disagreement.
You definitely imply in multiple places in your posts that you need to study near-constantly in order to do well in M1/M2/Step (when you 'already knew' that the prior poster spent little time with their children, when you stated that all M1/M2 schedules are the same: "STUDY", etc.)

If you want to back off now and recognize that you were being a little extreme about the amount of dedication and studying necessary in M1/M2, that's fine...but let's not pretend that this was your stance all along.

 

[Tenk]

If this had been what you were saying from the beginning, we wouldn't have been in disagreement.
You definitely imply in multiple places in your posts that you need to study near-constantly in order to do well in M1/M2/Step (when you 'already knew' that the prior poster spent little time with their children, when you stated that all M1/M2 schedules are the same: "STUDY", etc.)

If you want to back off now and recognize that you were being a little extreme about the amount of dedication and studying necessary in M1/M2, that's fine...but let's not pretend that this was your stance all along.

No. It’s more than a full time job. It is extreme. I studied more during medical school than a lot of my non medical friends from high school/college worked. They also had their weekends off. I didn’t. I still hit the gym and played video games but I definitely worked harder than all of them. I did not study 24/7 nor did I ever say I did.

 

[M&L]

this is so much fun to watch. ppl snapping at each other. This literally makes my day.

 

[afib123]

if you are an average student with average intelligence, you need all the time you can get to get a 250+ especially second year.

I would not score in the 90th percentile on step 1 if I had kids.

If you think you are fine with a 230 OR you are smart and can pull of a 250 + giving your kid the attention they need OR you have parents/husband to manage, go for it. Individual decision dependent on you

 

[Tenk]

i definitely agree with you. I am concerned about part 5 personally, since i will be 37 yo when i graduate medical school. I am not married though.. honestly, i am sort of considering looking into freezing my eggs )

Yeah, definitely something to look into. If you do go that route be sure to check the CDC as they publish all the IVF clinic results so you can know who is the best in your area.

 

[mehc012]

No. It’s more than a full time job. It is extreme. I studied more during medical school than a lot of my non medical friends from high school/college worked. They also had their weekends off. I didn’t. I still hit the gym and played video games but I definitely worked harder than all of them. I did not study 24/7 nor did I ever say I did.

Again, this depends on your school.
With the flexible schedule and infrequent exams where I ended up, it was far easier than college, and likely easier than even high school. I had all weekends off (except M3, of course) and at least 1 weekday every week with guaranteed no required activities. We only had 5 sets of exams in 2yrs, so there wasn't the constant test pressure. Sure, M1s/2s have to study, but it was in no way 'extreme'. I spent far less than standard work hours on med school throughout M1/M2. M3 I spent far more. Such is life.

Yours sounds like it was more extreme. Which sucks; glad you seem to have made the most out of it.
My only point, from the beginning of this convo, is that how difficult it would be to have children during med school depends on the schedule at your school. We can't answer this for OP; imagine you or I trying to advise each other on preclinical years, when clearly we had VERY different experiences. It's just not a universal thing.

 

[Tenk]

Again, this depends on your school.
With the flexible schedule and infrequent exams where I ended up, it was far easier than college, and likely easier than even high school. I had all weekends off (except M3, of course) and at least 1 weekday every week with guaranteed no required activities. We only had 5 sets of exams in 2yrs, so there wasn't the constant test pressure. Sure, M1s/2s have to study, but it was in no way 'extreme'. I spent far less than standard work hours on med school throughout M1/M2. M3 I spent far more. Such is life.

Yours sounds like it was more extreme. Which sucks; glad you seem to have made the most out of it.
My only point, from the beginning of this convo, is that how difficult it would be to have children during med school depends on the schedule at your school. We can't answer this for OP; imagine you or I trying to advise each other on preclinical years, when clearly we had VERY different experiences. It's just not a universal thing.

Wtf high school did you go to?


???

 

[mehc012]

Wtf high school did you go to?


???

Public school, man. Albeit one where I was able to take 5 AP courses/yr, plus 2 non-APs.
In high school you have 7 classes at once, all assigning their own homework, all with frequent tests, all with tons of busywork, etc. Not to mention all of the extracurriculars (that aren't really optional), and the extra time taken up just because you're a minor and can't control your own schedule or even drive yourself around much of the time. Oh, and attendance was beyond mandatory. Between school, sports, and music, I probably had as many required hours for most of high school as I did in M3. Plus, I was super broke back then.
College was similar...lots of problem sets, tons of required lab times, essays all over the place. Just lots of time consuming stuff.

Then you get to med school, where all of your courses are designed to be taken alongside one another, you have one coordinated homework assignment each week and one set of exams every few months, all coordinated around complementary material, and any extracurriculars you do are finally truly extracurricular.

It's the first time where the only expectation is that you learn the material ~somehow~ in time for the exams. You have your own generous budget and almost completely open schedule in which to do it. How is that not the easiest way to learn?
Plus, we're only learning about one subject - medicine. Much less work than 7 different courses, or 5 in college. And we learn it in much less detail than in college.

 

[WedgeDawg]

Please keep responses on topic, respectful, and professional. Thanks

 

[Goro]

I've done quite a bit of research on when's the best time to have a baby in your medical training and the most common responses are; first and second year; not during third year; fourth year; not during intern year; after intern year; after residency.

I'm going to be an incoming student (Class of 2023, woohoo!) and would like to deliver during summer between first and second year because of all the flexibility offered during this time in my training. Any thought, comments, questions, concerns, tips? I want to make sure I make as informed of a decision as I can.

Frankly, in a medical career, there is no good time to have a kid until you're Professor Emeritus, so you might as well have them now.

I've had students who gave birth while in pre-clinical years. Most of them simply took a year off and graduated a year later. When I was a grad student, I knew one gal who had not one but two kids in med school, and she still graduated on time. Funny thing was that she hated touching patients. I think she went into Path.

 

[njtrimed]

I gave birth to my second at the beginning of M2, and did not take time off. It is absolutely doable if you have support, and if your school does not have mandatory attendance on a daily basis. I spent the first half of the year sitting on the couch studying with the baby on a nursing pillow. I actually did slightly better initially because I was kind of forced to sit still so much of the day! I have a friend who had a baby just before M1 and she is at the top of her class. We’re both very involved in our kids’ lives; it’s really no different from having a job. Quite honestly, it was significantly easier having a newborn during M2 than it was in my previous career.

That being said, I chose to wait until I spent a few months during M1 assessing whether or not it would be practical for me to do this. I personally did not want make any decisions until I had a sense of how my family was going to adjust to me being in medical school. Also, I would imagine it would be more difficult having your first kid during medical school since the adjustment to parenthood is huge. Having a second kid didn’t change our lifestyle nearly as much as having the first.

There is definitely no “right” time, but my own experience is that preclinical years were pretty ideal for having a baby. Side note: my understanding is that if you go into surgery, you will likely have to delay graduation if you take more than 4 weeks off in a given year. I haven’t actually looked into this, but it’s something I have heard from some of my mentors who gave birth during surgery residency.

 

[libertyyne]

There is no good time to have a kid. There are less bad times.

imo, Reasonable times :
summer between M1-M2
M4
and NOT intern year.

If you are concerned about matching a super competitive specialty perhaps taking a research year after step and having it during that time might be beneficial.

That being said, you are going to have to be OK with not spending as much time as most people would like to with the little one, But frankly this is the norm with any professional working 60 hours a week. This will become especially arduous during dedicated and parts of m3. The key is having a spouse who understands that you will have to be selfish with your time and may not be able to help out as much. Having support near by will also help.

 

[Tenk]

Quite a bit. I don't have a lot of friends or a very vibrant social life so my time was really only split between my family and med school. Again, I'm not saying this is for everyone but I really don't understand why you are vehemently arguing that this is a deal breaker and will tank your step score. For some reason people think that medical school is the hardest thing on planet earth (not sure if this is an ego thing or what) but it isn't. I know you are an attending and I have to give you some credit because medical school probably was harder for you than for the current generation because we have much better resources than med students had even ten years ago. Things have become much more efficient and the spaced repetition programs like Anki are incredible. My point is that I think you are unaware or misinformed of the variation in how much people study. MS1 and MS2 were an absolute breeze for me and I could have passed by spending 15 hours a week studying (not just hypothesizing here, I spent about 20 hours a week on my last class of MS2 since I was studying for step 1 and still passed the class at 90th percentile). All of this uphill-both-ways-in-a-blizzard talk isn't really relevant to the current medical school scene. Nearly every school has pass/fail classes, there is a push for "wellness", and they try to schedule things to give us days off. Combine these with less than 40 hours of work per week and medical school is a pretty cush job.

Lol so basically you’re a genius and your advice to people is to be incredibly smart because med school is a joke. If it’s such a joke why do people fail? Good for you that you had to study so little. I tip my hat, but you are by far, far, far and away the exception and not the rule.

Also I never once said it would tank your score. All I said is that you can score higher on step one without kids than with kids and that medical school is harder with kids than without. I never once said that your score would tank. I never said kids are a deal breaker. I simply said they are easier to have in residency than medical school and even easier as an attending. Maybe reread all of my posts?

You did say one thing right though: medical school isn’t the hardest thing in the world. Watching children die is the hardest thing in the world and I’ve done plenty of that. Get off your high horse.

 

[raiderette]

I have a three-day old, and it was a big surprise. I chose to take a research year, which seems to be ideal. I finished my 3rd year, have been able to pump out some papers already, and will have plenty of time to do other work. Truthfully, if I hadn't had such a high risk pregnancy, I would say that giving birth early in 4th year would be ideal. I am glad I won't be pregnant during interviews, and the extra research can't really hurt. Guess we will see if it hurts me.

 

[mehc012]

Lol so basically you’re a genius and your advice to people is to be incredibly smart because med school is a joke. If it’s such a joke why do people fail? Good for you that you had to study so little. I tip my hat, but you are by far, far, far and away the exception and not the rule.

Also I never once said it would tank your score. All I said is that you can score higher on step one without kids than with kids and that medical school is harder with kids than without. I never once said that your score would tank. I never said kids are a deal breaker. I simply said they are easier to have in residency than medical school and even easier as an attending. Maybe reread all of my posts?

You did say one thing right though: medical school isn’t the hardest thing in the world. Watching children die is the hardest thing in the world and I’ve done plenty of that. Get off your high horse.

I love how you're still denying the stance you took through the first half of this thread.
Also, you know you've lost when you have to invoke the "I watch children die" argument when it's entirely unrelated to the topic at hand.

 

[Tenk]

I love how you're still denying the stance you took through the first half of this thread.
Also, you know you've lost when you have to invoke the "I watch children die" argument when it's entirely unrelated to the topic at hand.

I'm sorry you are upset about my opinion on the internet.

 

[sunshinefl]

I have a three-day old, and it was a big surprise. I chose to take a research year, which seems to be ideal. I finished my 3rd year, have been able to pump out some papers already, and will have plenty of time to do other work. Truthfully, if I hadn't had such a high risk pregnancy, I would say that giving birth early in 4th year would be ideal. I am glad I won't be pregnant during interviews, and the extra research can't really hurt. Guess we will see if it hurts me.

Aww congratulations on the birth!!!

 

[TRPMinus]

Lol so basically you’re a genius and your advice to people is to be incredibly smart because med school is a joke. If it’s such a joke why do people fail? Good for you that you had to study so little. I tip my hat, but you are by far, far, far and away the exception and not the rule.

Also I never once said it would tank your score. All I said is that you can score higher on step one without kids than with kids and that medical school is harder with kids than without. I never once said that your score would tank. I never said kids are a deal breaker. I simply said they are easier to have in residency than medical school and even easier as an attending. Maybe reread all of my posts?

You did say one thing right though: medical school isn’t the hardest thing in the world. Watching children die is the hardest thing in the world and I’ve done plenty of that. Get off your high horse.

Can I ask an honest question? What makes you a better authority on time management in medical school or studying for step 1 than current M3/M4 students? After all, it's presumably been several years since you went through these and the landscape has changed significantly.

 

[Terror Billy]

As someone going through M1 I can say only you can know if you are ready for having a kid during school. There is some major one size-fits-all advice being thrown out by highly intelligent class toppers. Sure you can have a kid and finish top 1 percent of your class, but the likelihood is very very low (even without kids it's hard). If you are a very strong student and you don't need much time with material to get it down, then maybe do it. But, if you have even a doubt about keeping up with the material and other life obligations, think hard about it. I struggled early on and now I'm doing a lot better, but I still have to work my tail off for my scores, don't get trapped into blanketing advice on SDN, people love to fluff up their accolades on here. From speaking with friends, family members and classmates going through the process this seems to be more of the norm, rather than the whole "med school is cush" crowd...

**one last note: this advice can vary by school based on curriculum, I'm speaking from someone in a traditional curriculum. I know some schools where you barely have class and it's guided self study with PBL mixed in, if you're at one of those it's a totally different game.

 

[Semper-fi]

Frankly, in a medical career, there is no good time to have a kid until you're Professor Emeritus, so you might as well have them now.

I've had students who gave birth while in pre-clinical years. Most of them simply took a year off and graduated a year later. When I was a grad student, I knew one gal who had not one but two kids in med school, and she still graduated on time. Funny thing was that she hated touching patients. I think she went into Path.

Thanks for the comment. I feel the same way. If you have them during residency, everyone will hate you and your pregnancy will be blamed for everything. So might as well have them when our time is the most flexible and I’m younger lol

 

[Semper-fi]

There is no good time to have a kid. There are less bad times.

imo, Reasonable times :
summer between M1-M2
M4
and NOT intern year.

If you are concerned about matching a super competitive specialty perhaps taking a research year after step and having it during that time might be beneficial.

That being said, you are going to have to be OK with not spending as much time as most people would like to with the little one, But frankly this is the norm with any professional working 60 hours a week. This will become especially arduous during dedicated and parts of m3. The key is having a spouse who understands that you will have to be selfish with your time and may not be able to help out as much. Having support near by will also help.

I agree about there being bad times to have a baby. I definitely have a supportive partner and family. Thanks!

 

[Semper-fi]

As someone going through M1 I can say only you can know if you are ready for having a kid during school. There is some major one size-fits-all advice being thrown out by highly intelligent class toppers. Sure you can have a kid and finish top 1 percent of your class, but the likelihood is very very low (even without kids it's hard). If you are a very strong student and you don't need much time with material to get it down, then maybe do it. But, if you have even a doubt about keeping up with the material and other life obligations, think hard about it. I struggled early on and now I'm doing a lot better, but I still have to work my tail off for my scores, don't get trapped into blanketing advice on SDN, people love to fluff up their accolades on here. From speaking with friends, family members having gone through and fellow classmates this seems to be more of the norm, than the whole "med school is cush" crowd...

**one last note: this advice can vary by school based on curriculum, I'm speaking from someone in a traditional curriculum. I know some schools where you barely have class and it's guided self study with PBL mixed in, if you're at one of those it's a totally different game.

Thanks! I definitely don’t listen to blanketed statements. And yes, my school will definitely be more self-study and minimal required attendance

 

[Semper-fi]

Depends on your class setup. If you don't have to go to the physical school every day, it's easier.
Our school, for M2, required only 3d/wk of 10am-noon PBL, with occasional (no more than 1x/wk) afternoon sessions that were mandatory. Exams were only every few months and were true pass/fail, so there was a lot of flexibility to it.

My point being, OP...now that you know what your school setup is like, evaluate based on that, not what people on the internet who dont know your schedule would say.

I definitely think my school's setup is very accommodating to having a baby between first and second year !

 

[Semper-fi]

Umm no. Having a child makes absolutely nothing easier other than your ability to fall asleep at any time. Having a child during the first two years is almost guaranteed to lower your step one score. If I would have had a child during my first two years there is absolutely no way I would have scored as high as I did on step one which could have adversely affected my ability to match emergency medicine.

Medical school is literally just a process of getting into residency. You want the best possible match not just for yourself but for your family as well. This is to ensure you have the best career path as your specialty will determine your next 20-30 years and there can be a difference in milllions of dollars over that time. I have kids now and I only want to provide them with the best possible life and opportunities to succeed. Therefore I feel it is best to wait until you match to ensure the best possible future not only for yourself but for your future family as well. In addition why have kids if you can’t spend time with them?

Also, the schedule for MS1 and MS2 is the same at every medical school: STUDY.

I'm not looking to match into a super competitive specialty so for me, it's definitely not a priority to go super beast mode for step one. I chose a career in medicine for my family; the one I was born into and the one I will create so for me it's not ideal to have my first child in my early 30s and my partner isn't willing to wait that long either. I just think it's the best time for us and we feel comfortable knowing that both of our families are on board and supportive of our decision to have kids.

In terms of spending time with them, I actually think preclinical years will provide plenty of time especially at the school I'm going to which is very much laid back and only requires us to be on campus 3 times a week for 3 hour sessions at a time so I know I'll be able to spend plenty of time with my newborn. As for clerkships, I won't get to spend as much time but that won't be forever, you know? It's just a phase of medical school and once 4th year is here, I will have more flexibility and time again.

Thanks for the feedback!

 

[Semper-fi]

I feel like this is one of those times when there is no right or wrong . It all depends on how much you can handle , and how much support you have . I know that I cannot handle it , since I have NO support at all .

I agree. Having children no matter what, is a very individual and case-by-case basis.

 

[Semper-fi]

Time is finite. You cannot argue this. It is science. In the day you have 24 hours. The way you spend this time will be different for everyone. In order to spend time with a child, you will have to take time away from something else. Therefore to achieve your maximum step score you would have to spend almost no time with your child for months. It’s honestly not a difficult concept, can’t really figure out why you are arguing against it.

I see your point. For me achieving a maximum step one score isn't a priority at all. I plan on matching into peds or family medicine. I've definitely thought about how much time I could spend with my child but I think I can manage it. There will be times when it's a lot harder than others so I just gotta keep remembering that my entire medical career won't be like clerkships. That's what keeps me going lol

 

[Tenk]

I see your point. For me achieving a maximum step one score isn't a priority at all. I plan on matching into beds or family medicine. I've definitely thought about how much time I could spend with my child but I think I can manage it. There will be times when it's a lot harder than others so I just gotta keep remembering that my entire medical career won't be like clerkships. That's what keeps me going lol

Yup. So long as you have the family and financial support and are perfectly happy matching into a non competitive specialty then you should absolutely do what makes you happy. It’s also healthy that you are putting yourself and family above your career as those who don’t are more inclined to experience divorce and burn out. Good luck and get extra sleep now.