How do you survive?????

[jbone]

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Ok, heres my situation.
Starting at DMU this fall. I'm married and have 2 children. My wife wanted to stay home and raise the children. I just got back from Des Moines and had a little heart to heart with the financial aid person. She explained to me that the buidget was about 52,500 dlollars. After tuition/books the remaining amount for EVERYTHING ELSE is only about $18,000-$20,000 😱 (foggy about this). This is only about $1600/month to LIVE ON????? 😱 How is this possible? How do you have a family and survive on such a small amount? Is there additonal funds we can secure just to survive? If so, how do I contact them to get this going? Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated. How do YOU survive?????? 🙁
Jason

 

[Jayrod14]

Ok, heres my situation.
Starting at DMU this fall. I'm married and have 2 children. My wife wanted to stay home and raise the children. I just got back from Des Moines and had a little heart to heart with the financial aid person. She explained to me that the buidget was about 52,500 dlollars. After tuition/books the remaining amount for EVERYTHING ELSE is only about $18,000-$20,000 😱 (foggy about this). This is only about $1600/month to LIVE ON????? 😱 How is this possible? How do you have a family and survive on such a small amount? Is there additonal funds we can secure just to survive? If so, how do I contact them to get this going? Any advice would be GREATLY appreciated. How do YOU survive?????? 🙁
Jason

There is a loan that you can take out through Bank of America that does not require school certification. Since it does not require school certification, it goes straight into your bank account and does not count towards the school's educational budget. You can take out up to 30K/ year as long as you dont exceed the 220K total from all sources over four years.

I'm in a similar situation. I'm married with one child, and I plan on taking advantage of this loan next year. Hope this helps.

The link is: http://www.bankofamerica.com/studentbanking/index.cfm?template=stb_education_maximizer_loans

 

[Charlie Bravo]

Can't she at least get a part time job to help out?

 

[yadayadadude]

Bottom line: being a stay at home mom is a luxury that maybe you guys can't afford for the next few years.

 

[goinverted]

Boner, you should have come to work with me this summer!!

 

[GoJoeyMojo]

Are your kids still very young? If she could even find a low-wage job working 20 hours/week, then you would have at least an extra $400/month.

 

[DireWolf]

Stop voting for Republicans that want to slash student financial aid even more. You reap what you sow.

 

[yadayadadude]

What do Republicans have to do with the budget at DMU?

 

[Amy B]

Are your kids still very young? If she could even find a low-wage job working 20 hours/week, then you would have at least an extra $400/month.

If they are young, this amount would be gone in daycare expenses. You wil have to weigh out childcare amounts verse what she can make working or staying home and paying no child care. I was able to take out an extra $3000 for child care expenses, so look into if your school allows an additional amount for child care if you have smaller kids. The extra $3000 paid for before and after school care for my child.

Bottom line, med school is a struggle financially. No doubt about it. We are finding that out this summer. My hubby took a 50% pay cut to move here and it is really really hard. Talk to the financial aid office at yoru school and see if they have any suggestions. Good luck. I wish I had an easy answer for you.

 

[DireWolf]

What do Republicans have to do with the budget at DMU?

There is a maximum amount of federal aid you are allowed to borrow - the Republican bill floating around wants to cut this amount. Therefore, each individual school's budget is effected by the federal rules.

 

[Raven Feather]

There is a loan that you can take out through Bank of America that does not require school certification. Since it does not require school certification, it goes straight into your bank account and does not count towards the school's educational budget. You can take out up to 30K/ year as long as you dont exceed the 220K total from all sources over four years.
I'm in a similar situation. I'm married with one child, and I plan on taking advantage of this loan next year. Hope this helps.

The link is: http://www.bankofamerica.com/studentbanking/index.cfm?template=stb_education_maximizer_loans

It definately would not be hard to exceed 220K. Tuition roughly 140k,living expenses for single peson about 15k=60k. So, basically you can receive an extra 5k each 4 years from the Bank of America. That sucks.

 

[Amy B]

Stop voting for Republicans that want to slash student financial aid even more. You reap what you sow.

Aw come on Dire, Pres Bush signed the new GRAD PLUS loan this year, to take the place of private loans. That is a BIG deal to people since the credit requirements are WAY easier to get approval. It is paying for my MSIV year when I tap out my stafford loans.

Gotta love the Republican 😀

 

[DireWolf]

Aw come on Dire, Pres Bush signed the new GRAD PLUS loan this year, to take the place of private loans. That is a BIG deal to people since the credit requirements are WAY easier to get approval. It is paying for my MSIV year when I tap out my stafford loans.

Gotta love the Republican 😀

Aw come on Amy.

So you're happy because you will be paying higher interest rates with a private loan instead of increasing the maximum stafford limit, which would allow you to have lower interest rates?

wow.

 

[yadayadadude]

I don't understand this $220K limit everyone is talking about. Does that apply to PLUS loans too? Don't some people end up with debt above $220K?

 

[DireWolf]

I don't understand this $220K limit everyone is talking about. Does that apply to PLUS loans too? Don't some people end up with debt above $220K?

$220K is the federal loan limit. Anything beyond that, you are required to take out private loans, which have higher interest rates.

That's why it is in your best interest (no pun intended) to take out all the federal loans you can before turning to private loans.

 

[yadayadadude]

Why is the federal government responsible for securing my entire medical school debt?

 

[rgerwin]

I thought the maximizer loans were just capped at 130K for those loans?

 

[Raven Feather]

I don't understand this $220K limit everyone is talking about. Does that apply to PLUS loans too? Don't some people end up with debt above $220K?

I thought it was 189 something cap for stafford. I don't know where the additional 30k was added, I thought that was just a req. for the Bank of America that was mentioned. It doesn't apply to the GradPlus--there is no limit.

 

[yadayadadude]

Are the BoA Maximizer loans subject to the $220 limit or not?

 

[DireWolf]

Why is the federal government responsible for securing my entire medical school debt?

uh because how else are we supposed to afford it? we are providing an invaluable service to our citizens. if this country wants doctors, it needs to provide them with every possible resource to help them succeed. with physician reimbursements declining (at best remaining steady and losing to inflation), having low interest-rate loans from the government is the only way many physicians can afford to pay them back.

By the way, that $220K is a lifetime maximum. So if you went to a fancy private undergrad and racked up $120K in federal loans, that only leaves you with $100K for medical school.

 

[yadayadadude]

I doubt that, if the federal government were to suddenly get out of the student loan business, all the medical schools in the US would dry up. But we're not going to agree about this, so we should probably not hijack this thread any further.

 

[DireWolf]

I doubt that, if the federal government were to suddenly get out of the student loan business, all the medical schools in the US would dry up. But we're not going to agree about this, so we should probably not hijack this thread any further.

The government is not getting out of the business - just debating decreasing loan amounts - thus leaving private companies to fill the gap with their higher interest rates.

And I agree. No more discussion about this.

 

[jbone]

Thanks for the responses. Pretty lame it went political but what can you do? 🙄
Anyway, the Bank of America loan (Maximizer?) Does it have a limit? Can you go beyond the $220? Because if you do the math 4x53,000=212,000. So all I would be able to get for the next 4 years is aprox. $8,000? (250 dollars more a month?) Ouch. Why the anti-family vibe from med schools? I'd rather have my wife raise my kids (which is a FULL time job), than some stranger. Oh well...keep the input comming. I'm sure there are many out there with the same questions. Do tell.... 👍

 

[AmaurosisFugax]

Don't listen to those saying your wife should get a job. They don't understand how it's not worth it, in so very many ways. The expenses of caring for your kids, the added strain on the family, the extra worry of what the hell is happening to your kids while neither you nor your wife is around them.... You don't need any of that.

I have a wife and a kid. My wife stays home with her. We borrow about 50k per year, but we also get food stamps and "cash" food stamps. The way we see it, if anyone is worthy of these state funds, it's us! We have so little income, it's a negative income, but these services help our income to be less negative. You should look into the same thing, also Title 8 housing (is that what it's called) anything you may qualify for from the state. You'd be surprised what you qualify for.

 

[babyruth]

Don't listen to those saying your wife should get a job. They don't understand how it's not worth it, in so very many ways. The expenses of caring for your kids, the added strain on the family, the extra worry of what the hell is happening to your kids while neither you nor your wife is around them.... You don't need any of that.

I have a wife and a kid. My wife stays home with her. We borrow about 50k per year, but we also get food stamps and "cash" food stamps. The way we see it, if anyone is worthy of these state funds, it's us! We have so little income, it's a negative income, but these services help our income to be less negative. You should look into the same thing, also Title 8 housing (is that what it's called) anything you may qualify for from the state. You'd be surprised what you qualify for.

You could also look into military and NHSC scholarships. These scholarships buy you a strict ticket for what you do after you graduate, but pay for everything and give you book, living, and per child stipends for both your kids. If you are worried about money and finding it hard to do it on one income, you might need to look into these types of things.

You also might suggest to your wife doing part time work out of the home, like during nap times or when the kids watch finding nemo for the hundredth time, she could do other things....? just a suggestion.

Do you have any family that live nearby; any one that could babysit?

 

[Doctor Bagel]

You could also look into military and NHSC scholarships. These scholarships buy you a strict ticket for what you do after you graduate, but pay for everything and give you book, living, and per child stipends for both your kids. If you are worried about money and finding it hard to do it on one income, you might need to look into these types of things.

You also might suggest to your wife doing part time work out of the home, like during nap times or when the kids watch finding nemo for the hundredth time, she could do other things....? just a suggestion.

Do you have any family that live nearby; any one that could babysit?

Medical transcription's a possibility -- I know of SAHMs who have done that to bring in some extra money.

Day care is expensive, so if your wife is an unskilled worker, I doubt she'd be able to earn enough money to justify that. However, I don't think it's necessarily anti-family to not encourage the spouse of a medical student to stay at home.

 

[ihateresearch]

Don't listen to those saying your wife should get a job. They don't understand how it's not worth it, in so very many ways. The expenses of caring for your kids, the added strain on the family, the extra worry of what the hell is happening to your kids while neither you nor your wife is around them.... You don't need any of that.

I have a wife and a kid. My wife stays home with her. We borrow about 50k per year, but we also get food stamps and "cash" food stamps. The way we see it, if anyone is worthy of these state funds, it's us! We have so little income, it's a negative income, but these services help our income to be less negative. You should look into the same thing, also Title 8 housing (is that what it's called) anything you may qualify for from the state. You'd be surprised what you qualify for.

The way I see it, being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a necessity. Basically all of us are paying some of our income so your wife can sit at home with your child. Great for you. Sucks for us. I would rather have my child know that i worked my ass off to care for her than that I lived off the work of other people, but that's just my perspective. we obviously have different opinions, not trying to start a war here.

 

[yadayadadude]

Could your wife run an in-home daycare? If she watched three kids, she could probably make $1000-1500/mo and you wouldn't have to find outside care for your kids.

BTW, I hate it when people say, "I don't want strangers raising my kids". My parents both worked, and guess what? I wasn't "raised" by "strangers". I was raised by my parents and cared for during the day by people my parents knew and trusted. I'm not saying you should arrange your family life in any particular way, but that expession really chaps my hide.

 

[ihateresearch]

Could your wife run an in-home daycare? If she watched three kids, she could probably make $1000-1500/mo and you wouldn't have to find outside care for your kids.

BTW, I hate it when people say, "I don't want strangers raising my kids". My parents both worked, and guess what? I wasn't "raised" by "strangers". I was raised by my parents and cared for during the day by people my parents knew and trusted. I'm not saying you should arrange your family life in any particular way, but that expession really chaps my hide.

true that, my parents both worked full time as well and i think that gave me the work ethic i have now, which i consider a good thing.

 

[Doctor Bagel]

The way I see it, being a stay at home mom is a luxury not a necessity. Basically all of us are paying some of our income so your wife can sit at home with your child. Great for you. Sucks for us.

Yeah, I got to say that I agree with this one, too. You don't need to have one parent at home to have happy, well-adjusted children. Sure, it could be a great thing, but it's not all that feasible for neither spouse to work. If you want your wife to stay at home, maybe you shouldn't go back to school until your kids are older.

 

[Luba Licious]

BTW, I hate it when people say, "I don't want strangers raising my kids". My parents both worked, and guess what? I wasn't "raised" by "strangers". I was raised by my parents and cared for during the day by people my parents knew and trusted. I'm not saying you should arrange your family life in any particular way, but that expession really chaps my hide.

Right. No one is suggesting getting a bum off the street to care for the children while a woman works. Hopefully, a responsible parent would do a little research and find someone caring and in line with their values to entrust their children with during the day. What happens when the kids go off to school and there's some stranger (teacher) "raising" the kids then?

I'm all for being a stay at home parent if the finances allow it, and I believe it is something that you should think about BEFORE you have children. At this point, I would say something has to give-either you can go to school and your wife works, or put it off till they're older and get a job. It isn't fair to force poverty on your children because you both don't want to give up your dreams.

 

[jbone]

Basically all of us are paying some of our income so your wife can sit at home with your child. Great for you. Sucks for us. I would rather have my child know that i worked my ass off to care for her than that I lived off the work of other people, but that's just my perspective.

I appreciate everyone’s comment thus far. But this crap is unnecessary and in no way constructive. Do you even have children?? If you do…great. How do you do it? Loans? If not…then this thread isn’t directed towards you. Good luck with that. 🙄

Anyway, I have no problem taking welfare/Medicare etc. as a medical student. When I'm a physician, my taxes will contribute FAR MORE than what I'll ever take out. Even with my wife working (who has a BS), we will still be near or at the poverty level. My wife has no problem with having a job, HOWEVER she is 5 months pregnant. Which means we will soon have a 1 1/2 year old as well as a newborn. Which might make it difficult to work...don't you think??? 🙄
THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT THREAD!
The intention of my post was to see how people do it. I'm not looking for an easy way out or excuses, I just want to know how a medical student does it financially. There are students out there with multiple children and a stay-at-home spouse. I guess this thread is more directed towards them, not the people who don't have any children and don't know what the hell they are talking about anyway. So those who have done med. school with kids or are currently doing this, how did you do it? Thanks for the comments.

 

[Luba Licious]

I appreciate everyone’s comment thus far. But this crap is unnecessary and in no way constructive. Do you even have children?? If you do…great. How do you do it? Loans? If not…then this thread isn’t directed towards you. Good luck with that. 🙄

Anyway, I have no problem taking welfare/Medicare etc. as a medical student. When I'm a physician, my taxes will contribute FAR MORE than what I'll ever take out. Even with my wife working (who has a BS), we will still be near or at the poverty level. My wife has no problem with having a job, HOWEVER she is 5 months pregnant. Which means we will soon have a 1 1/2 year old as well as a newborn. Which might make it difficult to work...don't you think??? 🙄
THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT THREAD!
The intention of my post was to see how people do it. I'm not looking for an easy way out or excuses, I just want to know how a medical student does it financially. There are students out there with multiple children and a stay-at-home spouse. I guess this thread is more directed towards them, not the people who don't have any children and don't know what the hell they are talking about anyway. So those who have done med. school with kids or are currently doing this, how did you do it? Thanks for the comments.

Actually, I do have children. And there's no way my husband or I could afford to be stay-at-home parents while I'm in school. Bottom line. I agree with you on the medicaid/food stamps/wica point, but having my husband stay home with the children would put us at a serious disadvantage financially, and the kids would have to sacrifice way too much. Our lives would suck. They say money doesn't buy happiness, but happiness doesn't buy groceries. So to answer your question, max out on the loans, have your wife open a daycare (serious money there), or learn to live without. Like you said, $1500 is not going to get you very far supporting a family of 3-4, even in Des Moines. Contact your school for better ideas, likely they've dealt with this before.

 

[deezballas]

I appreciate everyone’s comment thus far. But this crap is unnecessary and in no way constructive. Do you even have children?? If you do…great. How do you do it? Loans? If not…then this thread isn’t directed towards you. Good luck with that. 🙄

Anyway, I have no problem taking welfare/Medicare etc. as a medical student. When I'm a physician, my taxes will contribute FAR MORE than what I'll ever take out. Even with my wife working (who has a BS), we will still be near or at the poverty level. My wife has no problem with having a job, HOWEVER she is 5 months pregnant. Which means we will soon have a 1 1/2 year old as well as a newborn. Which might make it difficult to work...don't you think??? 🙄
THIS IS NOT A COMPLAINT THREAD!
The intention of my post was to see how people do it. I'm not looking for an easy way out or excuses, I just want to know how a medical student does it financially. There are students out there with multiple children and a stay-at-home spouse. I guess this thread is more directed towards them, not the people who don't have any children and don't know what the hell they are talking about anyway. So those who have done med. school with kids or are currently doing this, how did you do it? Thanks for the comments.

Thank you! I have a little girl and my wife will NOT be working outside the home when I am in school. We will find other ways to manage being with more debt, family help, welfare, or whatever. To each his/her own.

 

[ihateresearch]

Thank you! I have a little girl and my wife will NOT be working outside the home when I am in school. We will find other ways to manage being with more debt, family help, welfare, or whatever. I disagree with all these students saying "my parents both worked, and I turned out fine, blah blah". These parents probably just worked to make a few extra dollars to pay for their "non-necessary" living expenses. Not all of us are planning on having broken homes with multiple marriages under our belts when it is all said and done.

ok so now i'm really pissed. my parents both worked because that was what was needed at the time and they both had careers they wanted to pursue. i respected my mom for what she did and looked up to her and the way she balanced it all. sure sometimes i wished she would have been home with me after school, but all in all, i had a great childhood. and just to let you know my parents have been married 24 years. no broken marriages, no broken homes.

 

[Luba Licious]

Thank you! I have a little girl and my wife will NOT be working outside the home when I am in school. We will find other ways to manage being with more debt, family help, welfare, or whatever. I disagree with all these students saying "my parents both worked, and I turned out fine, blah blah". These parents probably just worked to make a few extra dollars to pay for their "non-necessary" living expenses. Not all of us are planning on having broken homes with multiple marriages under our belts when it is all said and done.

If you don't want judgements passed on you, don't pass judgements on others. What works for one family may not work for you, but it does not mean that it doesn't work period. "Mommy wars" is a slippery slope, and a very personal decision, and for you to decide that those who choose to work and have a family as inferior to your decision is intellectually dishonest and incredibly judgemental.

 

[Raven Feather]

My husband is going to be working and money will still be tight because we were used to 2 incomes--we will see what happens. I understand your concerns. I understand the sacrafices that you feel that have to be made now to ensure a better future for your family and the generations to come.

Here's an idea though. I'm sure there are gonna be other parents in your class looking for sitters. Especially for study time. I'd set up something with the school (I'm sure they are willing) to put out there that your wife is willing to babysit for pay. This will not only help your finances out but will help other worrisome classmates concerned about who is going to be watching their children. I've heard of this being done at KCUMB.

 

[ShyRem]

jbone, a few ideas. Get a chest freezer and buy meat from a butcher or farmer. You'll often pay as little as $1.50/lb for prime if you buy 1/2 a cow. The initial outlay will be a bunch ($900 or so), but you won't have to buy meat for a year. You can purchase bulk veggies/frozen fruits and toss 'em in there too. How about pick your own fruits? Fresh veggies from the farmers CAN be cheaper, but be wary here - sometimes it's not. Purchase stuff on sale when you can (around Thanksgiving our stores here have turkeys for about $8 each - I buy 4-6 of them and have turkey all year long). Grow herbs in pots or the front yard to make store-bought stuff taste homemade. Clothes are MUCH cheaper second-hand and you usually can't tell the difference. Be frugal with heat and layer your clothing. Pick up a hobby like crocheting or knitting and make blankets for the family for Christmas from inexpensive yarn.

It is doable on $1600/month. We've been raising a family of four on a take-home income of about $1700-1800/month and have been very comfortable.

 

[ihateresearch]

agree to disagree

 

[yadayadadude]

I disagree with all these students saying "my parents both worked, and I turned out fine, blah blah". These parents probably just worked to make a few extra dollars to pay for their "non-necessary" living expenses. Not all of us are planning on having broken homes with multiple marriages under our belts when it is all said and done.

You always hear that the #1 cause of divorce in the US is money disagreements. If that's true, four years of poverty while you're amassing a staggering debt doesn't exactly strike me as a sure path to marital bliss.

My parents both worked (and work) full time. They've been happily married for 35 years now.

 

[Dr Oc]

Quick solution to people who have been reading this, if you don't want to have this problem, be like everyone else in America and USE CONDOMS!!! Don't have kids when you are planning to go to med school. ESPECIALLY if your wife doesnt want to work.

 

[rgerwin]

Wow, this so offensive, I don't know where to begin.I'm frightenend that you will be a medical professional one day.

Thank you! I have a little girl and my wife will NOT be working outside the home when I am in school. We will find other ways to manage being with more debt, family help, welfare, or whatever. I disagree with all these students saying "my parents both worked, and I turned out fine, blah blah". These parents probably just worked to make a few extra dollars to pay for their "non-necessary" living expenses. Not all of us are planning on having broken homes with multiple marriages under our belts when it is all said and done.

 

[misparas]

Quick solution to people who have been reading this, if you don't want to have this problem, be like everyone else in America and USE CONDOMS!!! Don't have kids when you are planning to go to med school. ESPECIALLY if your wife doesnt want to work.

How does a conversation turn from student loans to pushing the use of prophylactics? Give me a break!! Go to the lounge to have philisophical discussions. www.drslounge.com

I'm curious about this student loan thing too. Any other comments on loans?

 

[Doctor Bagel]

I disagree with all these students saying "my parents both worked, and I turned out fine, blah blah". These parents probably just worked to make a few extra dollars to pay for their "non-necessary" living expenses. Not all of us are planning on having broken homes with multiple marriages under our belts when it is all said and done.

You always hear that the #1 cause of divorce in the US is money disagreements. If that's true, four years of poverty while you're amassing a staggering debt doesn't exactly strike me as a sure path to marital bliss.

My parents both worked (and work) full time. They've been happily married for 35 years now.

Yep, I've got two working parents who've been married since 1960. My sister's always worked and has two intelligent, sensitive, good kids, and she and her husband have been married for 22 years. Two working spouses isn't a death sentence to a happy family.

Again, if it's so important for one spouse to stay at home, I do think it's sort of irresponsible to go to school full-time. I think planning on your spouse staying at home full time and on you going to school full-time is asking for too much. With that little money coming in, you're going to expose your family to both food insecurity and housing insecurity.

 

[Marjoe]

Quick solution to people who have been reading this, if you don't want to have this problem, be like everyone else in America and USE CONDOMS!!! Don't have kids when you are planning to go to med school. ESPECIALLY if your wife doesnt want to work.

Oh, how helpful you are. I say forget medicine, and travel around providing the rest of the country with these nuggets of wisdom!

 

[MJB]

I'd be interested in knowing how people do it as well. I'm about to be thirty, my wife is thirty, and we don't have kids yet (people look at us like aliens because we don't)...I'm applying this year, but we'd like to have kids at some point before 35 I think. I just don't see how it's possible.

 

[moinmoin]

.

 

[jbone]

Actually, I do have children. And there's no way my husband or I could afford to be stay-at-home parents while I'm in school. Bottom line. I agree with you on the medicaid/food stamps/wica point, but having my husband stay home with the children would put us at a serious disadvantage financially, and the kids would have to sacrifice way too much. Our lives would suck. They say money doesn't buy happiness, but happiness doesn't buy groceries. So to answer your question, max out on the loans, have your wife open a daycare (serious money there), or learn to live without. Like you said, $1500 is not going to get you very far supporting a family of 3-4, even in Des Moines. Contact your school for better ideas, likely they've dealt with this before.

Thank you. 👍

 

[jbone]

Wow. This was not the intention of my thread. My point is simply this:
I HAVE NEVER BEEN A MEDICAL STUDENT. Many of you have or are.
All I wanted to know is how you survive...IF IT IS POSSIBLE. damn. 😡
If we both have to work to survive...fine. If she has to work...FINE. All I wanted to know was if we had the option via alternate loans etc. I don't really give a rats a$$ about how you were raised just fine in a working family etc. Hell, I was raised by a single mother with 4 other kids having NO father contact whatsoever. I think I turned out just fine. That is beside the point. The babysitting thing sounds great. I will probably pick up a job at the school library a couple times a week etc. I know we can do it, just wanted advice on how to make it more manageable. So please stop the mud slinging. It's just a simple question...that’s all. Thank you for your comments. If you have anymore positive ones, do tell.
Jason

 

[Dr Oc]

This might be off the subject, but it kind of relates I guess:
LINK!!!!!!