How do you tell them you have kids???

[nutmegs]

Mmmmm... I'm not going to lie, this is definitely a pet-peeve. I have fellow classmates who handle their dual reponsibilities as mom and student in a very admirable way. Then there is the woman on my last rotation who found a way to work her kids into every single godforsaken conversation she had with ANYONE. Meeting someone new? They'd know in the first two minutes, and she'd suck up the "wow, how do you do it" compliments like a nasty sponge. You're all right, I don't have kids. I chose not to, because I personally think it's pretty selfish- I want to be able to be there for my kids if I ever decide to have them. It won't be EASY later, but it'll be more possible than it is now.

And yeah, sorry but I am tired of special treatment. I have a cat who needs fed, lady, I need to get home too. Since when is being single and childless a crime? "You won't mind covering this, right? I have to go to Suzy's soccer game". Everyone gets to choose their priorities, people, why should the almighty "kids" be more important as a top priority than anyone else's #1?

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[SLUser11]

This horse has been dead for a while.

Although I, for the most part, agree with Lucinda-bashing, which I take partial credit for starting, I don't think she's still checking the thread. I think we can all agree that her comments sounded condescending and entitled.

I think it's time to move on. Now who knows a good yo-mamma joke?

 

[Dr Alo]

Actually...I'm not a big mommd fan...but thanks for the
(obvious) suggestion.

Spoken like someone without children. I would hardly liken raising a child to a game of pick-up football. Hopefully, one day you'll get it.

13 month old in pre-school

You are asking for advice, then making fun of ppl who give it?

Then you make fun of football?

Then you get mad for no ne responding quick enough.

And condescendingly say "spoken like someone who doesn't have kids."

And you have a 13 month old in pre-school? or day care?

And you are having trouble articulating that you have kids? You can't just say "Hey I have a daughter." You are asking people for advice on how to mention the fact that you have kids? Why do you have kids if you can't even figure out the basics in life? You can't speak, but you can make babies?

You have to be professional. Just say what you have to say, don't beat aroud the bush.

You're the type of medical student that people dread being on rotations with, pretentious, entitled, etc. People in the business world and medical world dread your type.

My God.

 

[cabinbuilder]

I was reading the first post and all subsequent post on this thread and to the orgininal poster: What are you thinking??? I say this because as a mother and a medical student I have NEVER asked for special treatment nor have I ever asked to leave early in order to pick up my children. I almost never talk about them at work unless I am asked directly and even then its kept to a minimum.

However, I do need some idea of what the hours for that rotation entails so on the first day I simply say, "Can you give me some idea of what hours this rotation requires so I may inform my husband so we can co-ordinate his job and daycare." Very simple and too the point. Most attendings understand that its helpful to know ahead of time. My husband arranges his job so he works when I'm off and he takes the kids to school and picks them up.

THE ROTATION COMES FIRST!!! PERIOD. I don't blame everyone else being angry, they should be. I would be angry too.

If you say you have to leave to pick up your child - FIND ANOTHER DAYCARE that accomodates you.

 

[fourthyearmed]

As a current intern let me give you some advice. THERE IS NO WAY YOU WILL BE ABLE TO LEAVE EARLY TO PICK UP YOUR KID AS A RESIDENT! Any program would kick you out in a heartbeat because your fellow residents would never put up with having to cover for you constantly. You are not the only one who would like to have a life outside of work.

 

[raptor5]

Look at it from my perspective-- why should someone who chose to have kids during or before med school get to go home at certain predetermined times, get to postpone tests in the 1st 2 years for various obligations, or get to take their boards half way through the 3rd year when the rest of us had to stick with the schedule?

Seen it at PCOM. Also have seen people bring their kids to lectures. Doesn't bother me. In the real world life isn't fair and in most jobs you end up doing the work of others or someone does your work for you b/c not everyone works at the same pace or has the same neurotic work ethic. I just hope when fellow students, interns, residents, or attendings help each other out that the recipient returns the favor. I don't mind helping people out as much as I can but what I hate is a lack of gratitude or abuse of my kindness.

 

[SLUser11]

THIS.....HORSE.....IS.....DEAD.

 

[mick2003]

.

 

[1Path]

Lucinda, I had to scrap my motherly duties and get my husband or someone from both sets of grandparents to pick up my son. .

GREAT point!

i used to try really hard to not seem like i was asking for any exceptions but when i saw my classmates trading call to play soccer, getting out of duties to go to a wedding, basically living THEIR life the way they wanted i decided to do the same, knowing that this can't happen every day. so when my son had a soccer game one weekend when i was on call, i was there.

Another great point!

Lucinda, I just wanted to point out that I cab understand why Mommd may be problematic for you because I stopped posting on that site for about a year. However, I now happily and regularly post there and can say without equivocation that the chances of you being called a schmuck or bitch on THAT site is probably 0%.

 

[ForbiddenComma]

I think that Lucinda knows better than to post here anymore.

Not that her behavior will change in real life, sad to say.