Is there a way to rub my acceptances into a persons face who picked on me in HS?

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202781

So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)
 
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202781

I dont think you know how bad it was for me. I know it should not bother me...but I just cannot help it. I have let it go for all other people who picked on me...but this one person I just cannot let it go.
 
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Bacchus

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So you're then called a nerd? That's still being made fun of. Also, I don't think this kid will care. There is a certain respect for humbleness and humility.
 

mfrizzo3

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Sure you could, but what makes you think he has changed. He may beat that a** again.
 

nkhan

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haha i highly doubt he will give a crap, get rich buy the store he works at then fire him if you want to rub something in :p
 

Nanon

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So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)

I think it's normal for you to feel this way, but trying to rub it in his face is missing the big picture. You getting into medical school will mean nothing to this guy right now. But when you're 40, own your own home, have a cute, cool partner and a couple of gorgeous, well behaved kids who go to great schools... that's the best revenge, believe me.

Personally, I would try to develop some empathy for this person. He tortured you because you threatened him on some level, and now as an adult, he's struggling. It's actually kind of sad.

I was tortured in hs because I was poor and uncool. I still (at 40) run into some of the same people occasionally. The few who are still dicks to me are usually the ones who have struggled the most along the way, and resent me for succeeding.

Truly, the best revenge is living well.

ETA: My husband points out that confronting this person (or anyone) would demean your accomplishment, and you.
S.
 

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I think you should probably just forgive and forget. It's not healthy to carry around a desire of revenge. Show yourself that you have moved on and have beat whatever he did to you by living a great life.
 

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Follow these 7 easy steps and succeed at rubbing it in his face, or your money back:
1) Get through med school, become a doctor.
2) Open up a clinic near where he lives. Offer free STD screenings and physicals.
3) Wait for him to show up.
4) Tell him he has a terminal disease and only 6 months to live.
5) Call him up 5 months later and say you were just kidding. Laugh.
6) ???
7) Profit!
 
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funkydrmonkey

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I AM one to hold a grudge, but don't demean something you have worked so hard for by rubbing it in his face. Who knows, maybe he does not know how hard it is to get into med school, and it would go to waste and make you look stupid. I say that you know HOW MUCH AWESOMENESS you have accomplished by getting into more than 1 med school, which is something that 24000 people would kill for, and be thankful for what you have. Considering your accomplishments, I know you are smart enough not to do anything stupid, like rubbing it into his face, where he will not fully be able to appreciate what you have done,


Good luck, and you can do great things!:luck:
 

MedicalSonata

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Ha...dude, wow. First - you should have taken care of this IN high school. But...assuming you were scrawney, etc...

Then remember: The best revenge is living well.

You made it through even with his torture, and you'll be a better person because of it. Just forget all about it, go on with your luxury, highly educated, upper middle-class life - and never think of him again.
 

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You should also recognize that, by making the effort to go to him and avenge your past, you are validating everything that he ever did to you. It's analogous to an internet troll; they only thrive in cases where they are given (undue) attention. Moreover, take into account that many people who attack/belittle others are simply making up for their own insecurities. I can’t say what those are without having met this person, but I would guess that the successes you’ve had over him alone give us a sense of why this individual attacked you the way he did (he was insecure about his future and could have been envious of your successes). Therefore, in a sense, there is a reason to feel sympathy for him.

I say let it go. And if by chance you should run into him and remember your desire for revenge, keep in mind that – solely by being a successful person who was visibly unaffected by this individual’s degrading attacks – you are already the better person. There is no need to go out of your way just to make that clear.
 
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I agree with what everyone else said. If you truly want to grow as a person, this should be irrelevant to the you of the present. You don't have to forgive it, but you should find a way to move on and forget about it. I was raped four years ago, and trust me, the more angry you let yourself feel about being hurt, the more you are giving someone else power over your life. Letting go is the only way to be free.
 

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Watch the movie Eagle Vs. Shark. Then make your decision.
 
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202781

I think you all are right.

I will not rub it in his face because I don't think his tiny brain would understand how difficult it is to get into medical school.


Seriously though i am generally not one to hold a grudge I just saw him last night (because everyone came back to town for T-day), and all of these emotions that I had bottled up inside came back.

I will let you know that I did not confront him, I was just wondering if I had made a mistake by not confronting him. And it looks like I made the right call by letting things go.
 

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I think you all are right.

I will not rub it in his face because I don't think his tiny brain would understand how difficult it is to get into medical school.


Seriously though i am generally not one to hold a grudge I just saw him last night (because everyone came back to town for T-day), and all of these emotions that I had bottled up inside came back.

I will let you know that I did not confront him, I was just wondering if I had made a mistake by not confronting him. And it looks like I made the right call by letting things go.

No you didn't make a mistake. He isn't the same person he was in high school and hopefully you aren't either. I was tortured in middle school and high school, but it made me a better person in the end.
 

chewsnuffles

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getting into med school should be something that should be celebrated with your friends and family. using the accomplishment in any other way marginalizes what you have done, and the last thing you would want to be seen as is another doctor with a chip on their shoulder.

just remember, becoming a doctor isn't something "confrontation worthy" unless he himself really wants to be a doctor or something and you beat him to it, but getting into medical school does not give you a fast pass to suddenly be in some sort of upper-crust aristocracy that thumbs their nose at everyone else, or is entitled to some sort of moment of redemption as in a Hollywood movie.
 

icarus8

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I think it's normal for you to feel this way, but trying to rub it in his face is missing the big picture. You getting into medical school will mean nothing to this guy right now. But when you're 40, own your own home, have a cute, cool partner and a couple of gorgeous, well behaved kids who go to great schools... that's the best revenge, believe me.

Personally, I would try to develop some empathy for this person. He tortured you because you threatened him on some level, and now as an adult, he's struggling. It's actually kind of sad.

I was tortured in hs because I was poor and uncool. I still (at 40) run into some of the same people occasionally. The few who are still dicks to me are usually the ones who have struggled the most along the way, and resent me for succeeding.

Truly, the best revenge is living well.

ETA: My husband points out that confronting this person (or anyone) would demean your accomplishment, and you.
S.
All well put. qft
 

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If your proud of something you have done like getting into medical school, wear your schools name on a shirt or a sweater so people can know what you have accomplished.

Dont be too modest where you undermine yourself, but dont act like a little kid either and make it obvious that your just bragging

I have had several people call me after a very long time of no talking just to let me know what they are doing with their lives now, and its weird because I never asked and never really cared, it was just so obvious they were bragging.

Wear your school letters on your clothes and whoever sees it, sees it, its a big deal getting through everything we have to go through and you should be proud of it, let people know, just do it in a way that makes it seem like your not bragging.
 

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So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)

He doesn't give a crap. If he saw you today he'd still give you a wedgie, push you into a dumpster, then walk off laughing in his football jersey. You're still a loser to him. You could win a nobel prize and he'd still twist your nipple. Don't be so bitter, he's a loser, you're a winner. Anyone who can't see where his life is headed - working at box store, attending high school football games, drinking in people's backyards on Friday etc - is just as dumb as he is.
 

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I recommend buying something at the big box store and then tipping him. Say something along the lines of "It looks like you need this more".
 

NurWollen

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So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)

But wait, rubbing it in high school bullies' faces is the whole reason I want to go to med school!!! ;)
 
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Be the bigger person. As a doctor, you will have to deal with these kinds of people all the time. And as many people here said, let the haters hate--Just live well and let that be your revenge.
 

nikemed

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Why is everyone assuming that this bully is dumber or will be doing less well than the OP? That's gonna really suck when you try to rub it in his face, and he's just doing something ridiculously more awesome and just laughs at you.
 

Pinkertinkle

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Get over it OP. You're being lame now.
 
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sle3pyguii

Good job on not doing anything about it.

If you still feel annoyed by him, think of it this way...you just got told that a school is willing to give you a chance to be a doctor. No point in wasting that feeling on some stupid grudge.
 

Perrotfish

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Why is everyone assuming that this bully is dumber or will be doing less well than the OP? That's gonna really suck when you try to rub it in his face, and he's just doing something ridiculously more awesome and just laughs at you.

Reading comprehension, OP said the bully worked in a big box store.

I had a friend who, when she came back from grad school for a couple of weeks, gained 10 pounds before she left again. She found out that an ex-boyfriend was working the fryer at her town's McDonalds and she ate there at least three times a day for the entire break. True story. Thought you should know the OP isn't the only one who thinks this way.
 

cbrons

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So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)

So you were the bottom of the totum pole for the first 10 years of your life and now will be at the very top for the next 60 or so while this individual remains at the bottom? Is it really that surprising to you? Like Bill Gates said, be nice to nerds, chances are you'll end up working for one someday.

I never had anyone bully me in high school but I was considered stupid (was put in special ed classes throughout elementary school) so I too feel like I have some need to prove my worthiness to my community and to myself.

But going to rub it in isn't going to make you feel any better ... believe me, its not. Try to forgive the person in your own mind and heart and maybe some of your old scars will start to fade. Don't hold a grudge your whole life, believe me, its toxic.
 

cbrons

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He doesn't give a crap. If he saw you today he'd still give you a wedgie, push you into a dumpster, then walk off laughing in his football jersey. You're still a loser to him. You could win a nobel prize and he'd still twist your nipple. Don't be so bitter, he's a loser, you're a winner. Anyone who can't see where his life is headed - working at box store, attending high school football games, drinking in people's backyards on Friday etc - is just as dumb as he is.

I doubt he still thinks hes awesome. Most people who were popular in high school and throughout adolescence in general wind up exceedingly depressed if their train of success gets derailed later on in life.
 

Chemdude

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No offense dude, but high school has long been done(I'm assuming 4 years ago). Who cares about what happened in high school? The things that happened in high school no longer affect your life. Worrying about things from the past is a sign of weakness.
 

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If he doesn't already know that you're in med school he'll find out, no reason to blatantly tell him. It'll eat him up inside and if you're humble about it he'll hate you even more for being such a good guy.
 
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So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)

I can relate. I'm serious, I can relate to how you felt in high school and how you were treated. Another poster already stated the best way to get back===live well!!!!!!!! There is no way better to get back at a person.

You don't want to rub it in his face, but there should be a way you should try to get him to know that you are in medical school. That will be the challenge.

I was always picked on, called names, called stupid, and so much more. I moved away from my home town the week after high school graduation because I couldn't stand it anymore. Seven years later I joined Facebook and added all of the enemies I had in high school and a couple gave a response saying they couldn't believe how far I have gone in life.

I recently got hired for a $100/hr part-time health reporter job and I posted in on my Facebook profile. That is all I had to do to rub it in their face. One person that called me many names in high school told me to sign him up for the job (he is sick of his little $12/hr jobs).

SUCCESS is the ultimate revenge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The thing you need to do is get the word out for how you have succeeded. Me, I used Facebook. I don't plan on going to the 10 year high school reunion because there is no point for me to brag about what I'm up to anymore.

My medical writing job pays $20 an hour and my health reporter job pays $100/hr. Get my master's degree and I can add another good $60k to who knows how much more to my yearly income!!!!!!!!!!!! That is success!!!!!!!

If you ever meet this person in person, all you have to do is be well dressed, drive a really nice car, and just smile and not say anything....put those sun glasses on when you get in the car to drive off!!!!!!! Any words you speak will be forgotten in time, but the image of you won't.
 

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I forgot to mention something. Getting into medical school is not a valid reason for showing off. It doesn't give you bragging privileges.
 

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The best way to get revenge on him, is to be nice to him. Kind words stir away anger.
 

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how about you just grow up.

or if he's still doing it then go punch him in the face, which is what you should have done 5 years ago. it's own your fault for not standing up for yourself.
 

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Money fixes everything, but the OP doesn't have any yet, so the acceptances are pretty irrelevant.
 
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154465

Dooooo iiiit! All of this it "demeans your accomplishment" stuff, eh I don't buy so much into it. Look, most people would be lying if they say they don't care even a little bit about the perceived prestige of this whole thing, so let's not all rush to point out how pure of heart we all are. Besides, med school is gonna start to suck real fast in a few months, why not get a little joy out of it? It's not like you're setting this guys car on fire and then sleeping with his wife. You're just subtly telling him "go eff yourself" a couple years later than you maybe should have. And cmon guys, don't lie, you've run into someone you know, or used to know, and smiled just a little bit after the med school bit came out...
 
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airplanes

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I forgot to mention something. Getting into medical school is not a valid reason for showing off. It doesn't give you bragging privileges.

It's definitely still an accomplishment to be proud of. To all the posters talking up the moneys...a comfortable lifestyle is nice, but there's more to a good life than how many figures you're pulling.
 

JeetKuneDo

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Rub it in, make fun of how he's probably gonna have to be working minimum wage. If he's too busy trying to make some cash, he probably can't work out that much. Go work out and get RIPPED to add some salt the wound.:laugh:
 

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It's definitely still an accomplishment to be proud of. To all the posters talking up the moneys...a comfortable lifestyle is nice, but there's more to a good life than how many figures you're pulling.

Yeah, I used to think that too.

Look, to the OP: you are basically in a culture right now (college, SDN) where high value is placed on medical school acceptances. For the rest of the population not intimately involved in it, it's not that cool. Many don't realize how hard it is to get in, and they won't be impressed until you can tell them "what kind" of doctor you are. In fact, the prospect of school until you're in your late-20's strikes many as assinine, and you're just as likely to be met with a comment like, "Oh, so you still don't have a job?"

The best revenge is a hot wife and fast car at your reunion. Trying to rub it in now still makes you look like the loser you were in high school. It's analagous to "rubbing in" your SAT scores. Nobody cares but you.
 

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If you chosed the medical field for money, you already lost. You get treated like crap by patients and have to be in school for 10+ years.

Ask the Business majors how much they are brining in with their relative short length of schooling and loans. It will make you rethink money.
 
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154465

Yeah, I used to think that too.

Look, to the OP: you are basically in a culture right now (college, SDN) where high value is placed on medical school acceptances. For the rest of the population not intimately involved in it, it's not that cool. Many don't realize how hard it is to get in, and they won't be impressed until you can tell them "what kind" of doctor you are. In fact, the prospect of school until you're in your late-20's strikes many as assinine, and you're just as likely to be met with a comment like, "Oh, so you still don't have a job?"

The best revenge is a hot wife and fast car at your reunion. Trying to rub it in now still makes you look like the loser you were in high school. It's analagous to "rubbing in" your SAT scores. Nobody cares but you.


That too. But you have to make sure your wife is graduating high school the year you're going to your reunion, you want em young.
 

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So is it wrong of me to have a strong urge to rub the fact that I will be going to medical school in the faces of those people who made fun of me constantly during high school? (This was not just teasing, it was constant torture)

I was just wondering whether there were any good suggestions about how to go about rubbing this in. (He dropped out of college and is working at a "Big Box Store" BTW)

There's serious problems when it comes to americans and respect. For the most part, non premed/med/doctors, don't respect doctors. They think "they are after the money" or "being a doctor is easy (and because theres so few of us, we are outnumbered by dirtbag low lifes, like old boy at the big box store"

Here's what will happen... You say I am going to be a doctor. He will say

"oo so you took the easy way out, being a doctor is easy money and takes no skill" - The average American
 

airplanes

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Yeah, I used to think that too.

Look, to the OP: you are basically in a culture right now (college, SDN) where high value is placed on medical school acceptances. For the rest of the population not intimately involved in it, it's not that cool. Many don't realize how hard it is to get in, and they won't be impressed until you can tell them "what kind" of doctor you are. In fact, the prospect of school until you're in your late-20's strikes many as assinine, and you're just as likely to be met with a comment like, "Oh, so you still don't have a job?"

The best revenge is a hot wife and fast car at your reunion. Trying to rub it in now still makes you look like the loser you were in high school. It's analagous to "rubbing in" your SAT scores. Nobody cares but you.

I know, I'm still somewhat idealistic and naive :)
Wasn't trying to say the $$ wasn't nice, just that I think there are a lot of other things that would make me happy as well.
 

Pinkertinkle

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There's serious problems when it comes to americans and respect. For the most part, non premed/med/doctors, don't respect doctors. They think "they are after the money" or "being a doctor is easy (and because theres so few of us, we are outnumbered by dirtbag low lifes, like old boy at the big box store"

Here's what will happen... You say I am going to be a doctor. He will say

"oo so you took the easy way out, being a doctor is easy money and takes no skill" - The average American
I dunno about that one, you're being too pessimistic.
 
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154465

There's serious problems when it comes to americans and respect. For the most part, non premed/med/doctors, don't respect doctors. They think "they are after the money" or "being a doctor is easy (and because theres so few of us, we are outnumbered by dirtbag low lifes, like old boy at the big box store"

Here's what will happen... You say I am going to be a doctor. He will say

"oo so you took the easy way out, being a doctor is easy money and takes no skill" - The average American

Look, I'm all for self-depreciation, but this isn't true. People don't really think like this... at least not where I'm from. Unless you're joking... because I can't tell...
 
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