MD & DO Meeting women during medical school

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For the successful individuals that have done it, HOW do you do it? I go to a DO school in the South that neighbors a large university (15k+ students). Great right? Nope. I have ZERO reason to go onto campus there, and I'd feel like a creep just sitting and people watching/trying to spark conversations.

Any suggestions are welcome. FWIW, I have ZERO interest in dating people in my class/class above me. Never dip your pen in company ink and all that.....
 
NeurologyHopeful2018 said:
Don't you want a wife who is also a doctor? $$$ and lifestyle never fades...
Click to expand...

In a perfect world, Yes, I would prefer someone who is a doctor (same lifestyle, hours etc.), but it's not something that I'm dead set on.

It also doesn't help that my class is 70:30 Male/Female, and of those 30%, 20 are married/engaged/In relationships.
 
Kisangani said:
Just based off my observations, I don't think relationships work very well in medical school. No reason to add any more stress and distractions from an already challenging lifestyle.
Click to expand...

Truth. For every successful couple you see, there are 10+ failed relationship that ruined his/her studies.
 
NeurologyHopeful2018 said:
Truth. For every successful couple you see, there are 10+ failed relationship that ruined his/her studies.
Click to expand...

Something else to keep in mind, within a couple of years you and your whole class will be dispersed all over the country in different residencies. Unless you are married and are eligible for some sort of "couple's matching," any relationship that is started in medical school will not last anyway.
 
kovalchuk71 said:
For the successful individuals that have done it, HOW do you do it? I go to a DO school in the South that neighbors a large university (15k+ students). Great right? Nope. I have ZERO reason to go onto campus there, and I'd feel like a creep just sitting and people watching/trying to spark conversations.

Any suggestions are welcome. FWIW, I have ZERO interest in dating people in my class/class above me. Never dip your pen in company ink and all that.....
Click to expand...
When you make arbitrary rules about who you can and can't date you really can't complain about not finding someone. Just go out, do stuff, talk to people and if you like someone who the hell cares if they are a doctor or a gas attendant at the end of the day if they make you happy and can work with your busy schedule that's all that matters.
 
ActinicKeratosis said:
No you need to list your step 1 score on Tinder...that's what works
230 + = 3 matches per day
240 + = 7 matches per day
250 + = 15 matches per day
260 + = you automatically match with everyone
Click to expand...

And if you are in the 220s have a blast with your left hand cause that's all you are getting (personal experience of course).

Women only care about 2 things: height and status (which in your case is linked to how well you match, and which is therefore intimately linked to how well you do on Step 1). Honestly kid, focus on studying for Step 1 every moment of your existence your first two years.
 
failedatlife said:
And if you are in the 220s have a blast with your left hand cause that's all you are getting (personal experience of course).

Women only care about 2 things: height and status (which in your case is linked to how well you match, and which is therefore intimately linked to how well you do on Step 1). Honestly kid, focus on studying for Step 1 every moment of your existence your first two years.
Click to expand...

I see someone else has taken the red pill 😉

Tenk said:
When you make arbitrary rules about who you can and can't date you really can't complain about not finding someone. Just go out, do stuff, talk to people and if you like someone who the hell cares if they are a doctor or a gas attendant at the end of the day if they make you happy and can work with your busy schedule that's all that matters.
Click to expand...

Where did I make rules (outside of my class)? I couldn't care less WHO I meet, but I just don't want it to come back and bite me if things don't go well (see: My class). Besides that, I'm down for whatever.
 
Don't wear your stethoscope on your neck. Women will flock to you.

Or do wear it. I don't care.
 
kovalchuk71 said:
I see someone else has taken the red pill 😉



Where did I make rules (outside of my class)? I couldn't care less WHO I meet, but I just don't want it to come back and bite me if things don't go well (see: My class). Besides that, I'm down for whatever.
Click to expand...
That's... exactly what I was referring to....
 
kovalchuk71 said:
For the successful individuals that have done it, HOW do you do it? I go to a DO school in the South that neighbors a large university (15k+ students). Great right? Nope. I have ZERO reason to go onto campus there, and I'd feel like a creep just sitting and people watching/trying to spark conversations.

Any suggestions are welcome. FWIW, I have ZERO interest in dating people in my class/class above me. Never dip your pen in company ink and all that.....
Click to expand...

I felt the same way. Ended up doing match and my roommate signed at the same time as me on a whim. Now weve both been married to our respective wives for 5 years.
 
Peach Newport said:
SDN expectation: "sorry honey, I only date top 20 MDs who've already matched ortho."

Reality: "you mean you're gonna be a MEDICAL doctor?"
Click to expand...

This is not true at all. Dating criteria for med students at my school are pretty harsh, generally for guys its 6'0+ and attractive. For females, it's literally just having a pulse and being thin. And even in the real world, no reasonably attractive girl gives a **** if you're a doctor or in med school. It's all based on being very attractive. If you wanna marry an average looking/below average slightly overweight girl who works at target, then you might be able to as an above average looking guy making a couple hundred grand/year. At that point though you're better off just playing call of duty with 12 year olds in your free time, because that's going to be more fun than being with that individual. Nobody has ever been impressed when I've told them I attend a US MD school (when they asked what I do). The only question they ask next, which I find pretty insulting, is "oh so you must have a lot of debt." At which point I say "no" and walk away. Better off saving your time and money anyways for high-end escorts. They'll be cheaper and hotter than a wife.
 
skiier54 said:
This is not true at all. Dating criteria for med students at my school are pretty harsh, generally for guys its 6'0+ and attractive. For females, it's literally just having a pulse and being thin. And even in the real world, no reasonably attractive girl gives a **** if you're a doctor or in med school. It's all based on being very attractive. If you wanna marry an average looking/below average slightly overweight girl who works at target, then you might be able to as an above average looking guy making a couple hundred grand/year. At that point though you're better off just playing call of duty with 12 year olds in your free time, because that's going to be more fun than being with that individual. Nobody has ever been impressed when I've told them I attend a US MD school (when they asked what I do). The only question they ask next, which I find pretty insulting, is "oh so you must have a lot of debt." At which point I say "no" and walk away. Better off saving your time and money anyways for high-end escorts. They'll be cheaper and hotter than a wife.
Click to expand...

Totally false. Women love doctors, especially women in the medical field.
 
skiier54 said:
They love the doctors who are tall and attractive. No one loves a doctor who's 5'8 and only above average.
Click to expand...

I've only been female my whole life, but in my experiences, the medical degree adds at least 2 points. Of course, I'm pursuing medicine myself, so that may be unintentionally biased.
Have faith, 'above average' can be described as stunning in some eyes.
 
skiier54 said:
They love the doctors who are tall and attractive. No one loves a doctor who's 5'8 and only above average.
Click to expand...

I would agree with this.

If you are Asian, short, and have no "game" - you need to make more than 1 million dollars than a tall attractive white guy with average career to make her even just to CONSIDER you the same. I think there was actually a published study done about this.

I know a number of my friends and family of Indian-American background who are successful surgeons/cardiologist/Neurologist..etc who decided their options back in their home country with a pool of half a billion females to choose from is much better deal than picking a fat, average, disloyal American woman. Once you are making >300K income, you would want to look for your companion, not your mirror self.
 
skiier54 said:
This is not true at all. Dating criteria for med students at my school are pretty harsh, generally for guys its 6'0+ and attractive. For females, it's literally just having a pulse and being thin. And even in the real world, no reasonably attractive girl gives a **** if you're a doctor or in med school. It's all based on being very attractive. If you wanna marry an average looking/below average slightly overweight girl who works at target, then you might be able to as an above average looking guy making a couple hundred grand/year. At that point though you're better off just playing call of duty with 12 year olds in your free time, because that's going to be more fun than being with that individual. Nobody has ever been impressed when I've told them I attend a US MD school (when they asked what I do). The only question they ask next, which I find pretty insulting, is "oh so you must have a lot of debt." At which point I say "no" and walk away. Better off saving your time and money anyways for high-end escorts. They'll be cheaper and hotter than a wife.
Click to expand...

You are possibly the only person out there who is *maybe* slightly more jaded than I am. :claps:
 
Kisangani said:
Just based off my observations, I don't think relationships work very well in medical school. No reason to add any more stress and distractions from an already challenging lifestyle.
Click to expand...
Disagree. I'd say of the relationships people started or continued from before medical school, half have ended in marriage or engagement as of MS4 and have been excellent support systems through the difficult lifestyle of medical school.
 
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skiier54 said:
They love the doctors who are tall and attractive. No one loves a doctor who's 5'8 and only above average.
Click to expand...
I'm no giant, I'm overweight, I'm average looking on a good day, and I'm not even a resident yet but I've found dating to be pretty easy throughout life. Just be comfortable in your own skin and things are fine more often than not.
 
Mad Jack said:
I'm no giant, I'm overweight, I'm average looking on a good day, and I'm not even a resident yet but I've found dating to be pretty easy throughout life. Just be comfortable in your own skin and things are fine more often than not.
Click to expand...

Don't let MJ bull**** you guys. He has gorgeous eyes and can grow the sort of beard that brings women to their knees. You guys never stood a chance.
 
Just you wait until some of your lady peers in medicine end up mid-30s and single. If any of you are still single by then, they'll be on you like white on rice, even if you're on the shorter side. Dating is hard for everyone in medicine but women have ticking clocks, and women in medicine, by virtue of their medical training and tendency to be long term planners, are keenly aware of this fact.

I used to be one of the most staunch about how tall a guy is, now I would just be insanely grateful if a guy was also in medicine and as such had all that in common with me. Feeling your mortality really gets you in touch with what matters.
 
Wtf happened to this thread.

Step 1 to finding a partner or friends is to get a hobby. People like other people who are good at things. Get good at something, whether it is an instrument or a sport. Invite people to watch you play in a recital/game. If you're talented, be public with your skills and word will get around.

Also, think about the last time you made someone laugh. If you can't remember a time, that's a problem. Watch stand up, listen to comedian pod casts, find people in your life who are genuinely funny and make an effort to learn from what they do.

Alternatively, you could always choose to become bitter like some of the upstanding bachelors in this thread. I get that putting lots of time and effort into finding a partner (or anything, really) and coming up short handed is frustrating, but the alternative to rolling with the punches and perseverance
is to become resentful. That's not a good look. Anyone worth your time is going to want someone with their **** together, and that includes their emotions and attitudes.

If that all seems unfair, well then tough ****. The world doesn't owe us anything, least of all another human being. Obviously some people will have it easier or harder than others, but that isn't reason enough to become bitter.

I'm certain this post will convince exactly 0 people, but I just wanted to interject something that wasn't "hurr durr women are shallow."
 
skiier54 said:
This is not true at all. Dating criteria for med students at my school are pretty harsh, generally for guys its 6'0+ and attractive. For females, it's literally just having a pulse and being thin. And even in the real world, no reasonably attractive girl gives a **** if you're a doctor or in med school. It's all based on being very attractive. If you wanna marry an average looking/below average slightly overweight girl who works at target, then you might be able to as an above average looking guy making a couple hundred grand/year. At that point though you're better off just playing call of duty with 12 year olds in your free time, because that's going to be more fun than being with that individual. Nobody has ever been impressed when I've told them I attend a US MD school (when they asked what I do). The only question they ask next, which I find pretty insulting, is "oh so you must have a lot of debt." At which point I say "no" and walk away. Better off saving your time and money anyways for high-end escorts. They'll be cheaper and hotter than a wife.
Click to expand...
NeurologyHopeful2018 said:
I would agree with this.

If you are Asian, short, and have no "game" - you need to make more than 1 million dollars than a tall attractive white guy with average career to make her even just to CONSIDER you the same. I think there was actually a published study done about this.

I know a number of my friends and family of Indian-American background who are successful surgeons/cardiologist/Neurologist..etc who decided their options back in their home country with a pool of half a billion females to choose from is much better deal than picking a fat, average, disloyal American woman. Once you are making >300K income, you would want to look for your companion, not your mirror self.
Click to expand...

I think your problems go much further than looks...

You're practically crying because it's so unfair that the hot women only want to date hot men, not the average/ugly ones. And yet you're completely unwilling to date women who are similarly attractive to you, even though in my experience, women are usually completely willing to date a slightly less attractive man with a good personality. It's wrong that hot women won't date below them, but totally okay that you're not willing to date someone at your level. But yes, it's the women who are the shallow/superficial ones!

Yes, dating can be hard, but it gets a lot harder if you have unrealistic expectations. Maybe if you stopped feeling so sorry for yourself you'd have better luck.
 
CCresearcher said:
I think your problems go much further than looks...

You're practically crying because it's so unfair that the hot women only want to date hot men, not the average/ugly ones. And yet you're completely unwilling to date women who are similarly attractive to you, even though in my experience, women are usually completely willing to date a slightly less attractive man with a good personality. It's wrong that hot women won't date below them, but totally okay that you're not willing to date someone at your level. But yes, it's the women who are the shallow/superficial ones!

Yes, dating can be hard, but it gets a lot harder if you have unrealistic expectations. Maybe if you stopped feeling so sorry for yourself you'd have better luck.
Click to expand...

Dude, I would be more than happy with an above average looking girl (my "level"). I don't think I ever said I'd be unwilling to do that. You must be in some other dimension if girls are dating below them because where I'm at, the guys are all dating below their level. One girl I know actually tried dating below her level because he had a "good personality" but that lasted a couple months before she went back to her former model-looking guy. I kind of agree with @NeurologyHopeful2018. While he's exaggerating a bit, there's data that shows divorce rates among Americans and Europeans is far above South American, China, Mexicans, and Middle Easterns. Those cultures also tend to place more emphasis on the guy's profession rather than sole attraction, and they must be doing something right because those marriages tend to last.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
NeurologyHopeful2018 said:
I would agree with this.

If you are Asian, short, and have no "game" - you need to make more than 1 million dollars than a tall attractive white guy with average career to make her even just to CONSIDER you the same. I think there was actually a published study done about this.

I know a number of my friends and family of Indian-American background who are successful surgeons/cardiologist/Neurologist..etc who decided their options back in their home country with a pool of half a billion females to choose from is much better deal than picking a fat, average, disloyal American woman. Once you are making >300K income, you would want to look for your companion, not your mirror self.
Click to expand...

Get into the gym and at least tone down that beer gut. It's really not that hard to get plays.
 
Iz_FtB said:
Wtf happened to this thread.

Step 1 to finding a partner or friends is to get a hobby. People like other people who are good at things. Get good at something, whether it is an instrument or a sport. Invite people to watch you play in a recital/game. If you're talented, be public with your skills and word will get around.

Also, think about the last time you made someone laugh. If you can't remember a time, that's a problem. Watch stand up, listen to comedian pod casts, find people in your life who are genuinely funny and make an effort to learn from what they do.

Alternatively, you could always choose to become bitter like some of the upstanding bachelors in this thread. I get that putting lots of time and effort into finding a partner (or anything, really) and coming up short handed is frustrating, but the alternative to rolling with the punches and perseverance
is to become resentful. That's not a good look. Anyone worth your time is going to want someone with their **** together, and that includes their emotions and attitudes.

If that all seems unfair, well then tough ****. The world doesn't owe us anything, least of all another human being. Obviously some people will have it easier or harder than others, but that isn't reason enough to become bitter.

I'm certain this post will convince exactly 0 people, but I just wanted to interject something that wasn't "hurr durr women are shallow."
Click to expand...

This is the best advice here. I'd be willing to bet that dudes who keep bringing up looks every time and complain about shallow women have much bigger personality flaws and insecurities that would make any reasonable woman run.
 
SunsFun said:
This is the best advice here. I'd be willing to bet that dudes who keep bringing up looks every time and complain about shallow women have much bigger personality flaws and insecurities that would make any reasonable woman run.
Click to expand...

And height. Don't forget height.
 
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