Not sure what to do

[palmpalm]

Hey all,

If you look back u will remember I posted on here a few months ago. I failed some exams and i have to repeat my entire first year of med school from scratch. ive been thinking a a lately and i am confused and dont know what to do. I know that i would enjoy being a physician and i will make a good physician. but i am beginning to feel that maybe 4 yrs of meds and more years of residency are a waste of time and that i should just move on with my life instead of repeating the year. a big reason for this is that niether me nor my advisors, the dean, counsellors, nobody can figure out why i failed. i went to class, i did my work i studied. i am not saying i should have gotten perfect but i should have at least passed. out of almost 100 students i am the only one who has to repeat and i just dont get it. i even got a psych assessment done. my iq is really high and i dont have any learning disabilities. i dont see what i could possibly do differently next year. i dont know why i failed or how to fix it. i keep fantasizing every day about other career paths outside of medicine and i just realised how unhappy i was this year.

im not even sure why i am posting beyond needing to write this down but i guess any feedback would be nice. what do u all think

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[beethoven]

People don't just fail for no reason. Maybe you thought you studied but you really didn't put enough time into it after all.

 

[palmpalm]

well yah, obviously. But the problem is (and you can see this from my thread from a while back) that I can't figure out what is wrong neither can my fellow students, advisors, professors, counsellors, psychologists, etc., etc. Something just aint right something just don't fit and I beleive it might me time for me and the med school game to quit. I don't know. I've been fantasizing about being a cop lately (very weird, as I don't actually wanna be a cop).

 

[maxbaner]

maybe testing anxiety or something? maybe daydreaming about being a cop is becoming a distraction? hopefully you find whats best for you

 

[palmpalm]

nope, w've tested for test anxiety-that aint it. and the daydreaming is a new thing, it has only started since I failed. I havn't been in school for a while now as they told me to just relax and come back fresh in september. i didnt have these daydreams while i was studying. do you all think that, given the situation, i should quit? or should i try again?

 

[Mr hawkings]

well yah, obviously. But the problem is (and you can see this from my thread from a while back) that I can't figure out what is wrong neither can my fellow students, advisors, professors, counsellors, psychologists, etc., etc. Something just aint right something just don't fit and I beleive it might me time for me and the med school game to quit. I don't know. I've been fantasizing about being a cop lately (very weird, as I don't actually wanna be a cop).

Have you actually sought proffesional help or are you talking about informaly talking to people.
I think you should amke sure you exhaust all options to find a reason for your state of mind before you decide whether to quit or not. As soneone who just got back into med school after 4 years of trying, i will tell you that not fighting harder to stay or exploring repeating a year as viable option back when i was having problems was probably one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
Once you leave, know that its going to be very difficult to get back in so make sure its what you want and that you wont have any regrets for walking away from medicine. these are things that a therapist could help you assess.

Good luck

 

[Doctor J]

Don't listen to any advice you get on this forum except my own (ignore the fact that what I just wrote is incredibly arrogant).

Talk to a mentor, religious leader, your parents, your best friend, your significant other, anyone who knows you well and respects you and has little stake in your continuing school or not. Tell them what you're feeling and ask their advice.

You'll get much better feedback this way.

My guess is that if you're feeling this way you won't do well even if you decide to come back next year. It requires a bit of enthusiasm to do well in medical school. Maybe that's what was lacking.

Repeat - ignore everyone else. You'll get a bunch of "Well my friend did this" and "I would do that" replies, none of which apply to you.

 

[searun]

Wow, you really are in a quandry. I think you need to factor financial considerations into your decision. Are you in debt, as most med students are, at least those of us without wealthy parents. You certainly don't want to be in debt to the tune of 2 years of med school and then find yourself exiting med school next summer. If money is not an issue, I would take another shot at it. If money is an issue, I seriously would consider cutting my losses and moving on.

 

[palmpalm]

I have spoken to profesionals profesionally, yes. psychologists, neuropsychologists, psychiatrists, education specialists, etc., etc.

Have you actually sought proffesional help or are you talking about informaly talking to people.
I think you should amke sure you exhaust all options to find a reason for your state of mind before you decide whether to quit or not. As soneone who just got back into med school after 4 years of trying, i will tell you that not fighting harder to stay or exploring repeating a year as viable option back when i was having problems was probably one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
Once you leave, know that its going to be very difficult to get back in so make sure its what you want and that you wont have any regrets for walking away from medicine. these are things that a therapist could help you assess.

Good luck

 

[palmpalm]

I have responded in the quote:

Don't listen to any advice you get on this forum except my own (ignore the fact that what I just wrote is incredibly arrogant).

Talk to a mentor,

done

religious leader,

i am an atheist Jew, that said, I did speak to a rabbi.

your parents,

done

your best friend,

done

your significant other,

done

anyone who knows you well and respects you and has little stake in your continuing school or not. Tell them what you're feeling and ask their advice.

they dont know what I should do either. Everyone is on the fence. There is no right or wrong answer is the opinion we all seem to have.

You'll get much better feedback this way.

My guess is that if you're feeling this way you won't do well even if you decide to come back next year. It requires a bit of enthusiasm to do well in medical school. Maybe that's what was lacking.

Repeat - ignore everyone else. You'll get a bunch of "Well my friend did this" and "I would do that" replies, none of which apply to you.

 

[palmpalm]

Wow, you really are in a quandry. I think you need to factor financial considerations into your decision. Are you in debt, as most med students are, at least those of us without wealthy parents. You certainly don't want to be in debt to the tune of 2 years of med school and then find yourself exiting med school next summer. If money is not an issue, I would take another shot at it. If money is an issue, I seriously would consider cutting my losses and moving on.

yah, i am in debt and will be more in debt as the year progresses. but i dont see money as a consideration. debt is debt nothingmore. it does not factor into my decision making here.

 

[searun]

yah, i am in debt and will be more in debt as the year progresses. but i dont see money as a consideration. debt is debt nothingmore. it does not factor into my decision making here.

Uh, debt is debt but nothing more. Well, sure when it is an abstraction, but when you actually have to start paying back a hundred grand for a MD degree that you kicked to the sidewalk, and you are getting sued by a collection agency who received the receivable from your lenders, it suddenly will become important. I asked if you had money, apparently you do not have money, so I assume that after two years of med school, if you continue to fail your classes, you will drop out of med school with one hundred thousand dollars plus whatever in debt. Sounds like a pretty bleak scenario to me, unless you can get it together academically. Because it sounds like you have no one to bail you out financially. And if it all goes to hell, the wolves will come to feast upon your bones, and eat what ever financial flesh is left, until you are bleak white bones baking in the sun and trying to rise from the ashes of bankruptcy. Unless you are one of these IBanking guys who makes cake and parties every Friday night in NYC. If so, my apology. If not, then think about your financial future.

 

[spicedmanna]

Well, I don't know you, so how can I possibly give relevant advice? That said, just based on what I'm hearing, it could be that, at this point in time, you simply don't want to be a physician, or at least succeed through medical school. If you aren't willing, consciously or unconsciously, then it will be very hard to succeed. Sometimes, given that, we can engage in very subtle sabotage, so subtle that we can convince ourselves and even others that nothing is wrong, when in fact, it is right underneath the surface, just beyond our view. What is it that you haven't faced about your issue?

I don't know how to help you. But I know that if you find your willingness to go forward and to succeed, you'll find the answer you are looking for. Good luck.

 

[Scaredshizzles]

I have spoken to profesionals profesionally, yes. psychologists, neuropsychologists, psychiatrists, education specialists, etc., etc.

The funny thing is that professionals can only help you based on what information you volunteer. You are right, something isn't adding up here. Obviously you were smart enough to get into medical school and I think that automatically makes you smart enough to pass. Try different ways of studying: between review books, textbooks, lecture notes, attendance at lectures, board review materials, question books, videos of kaplan lectures, etc. etc. you have a large set to choose from....If some of those didn't work for you, try a different approach. But clearly you need the motivation to pass and the confidence to pass. It sounds to me like you might have let self pity sneak in, which is never good.

Also, just a thought, but might you be depressed? Depression can come on with seemingly no trigger. And it is very difficult to concentrate and make material stick if you're depressed. And don't think that seeing a psychiatrist rules out that you have depression, they can only make that diagnosis based on the info you volunteer to them. (80% of all diagnoses are made by history.)

 

[spicedmanna]

The funny thing is that professionals can only help you based on what information you volunteer.

That's right, so, you have to first be willing to resolve (willing to take 100% responsibility for) your issue. Are you honestly willing? The results seem to suggest that you are not, which is okay, too, as long as you are completely in alignment with it and it is a conscious choice. Nothing much can happen until you find your willingness, or at least come into alignment with what is.

Also, just a thought, but might you be depressed? Depression can come on with seemingly no trigger. And it is very difficult to concentrate and make material stick if you're depressed. And don't think that seeing a psychiatrist rules out that you have depression, they can only make that diagnosis based on the info you volunteer to them. (80% of all diagnoses are made by history.)

That thought crossed my mind, too.

 

[searun]

Yeah, high IQ, successful undergraduate experience, no learning problems, no concentration problems, studies as much as most med students, it does not make sense. Something is going on, emotionally, in my opinion, depression that is a possibility. You must have emotional or psychological issues that are tubing you in med school....I would just not go more into debt until you figure out why you are screwing yourself.

Good luck,

Searun

 

[palmpalm]

thanks for the insight and advice so far, guys. i appreciate it. i have considered (as have the pros) the possibility that I am depressed or having emotional/psychological issues but we can't seem to find this to be the case. I mean now, after failing, I am definitly not in a great way emotionally (though I am ok) but during the year I am pretty sure I was fine. hrmmmm

 

[OncoCaP]

Hey all,

If you look back u will remember I posted on here a few months ago. I failed some exams and i have to repeat my entire first year of med school from scratch. ive been thinking a a lately and i am confused and dont know what to do. I know that i would enjoy being a physician and i will make a good physician. but i am beginning to feel that maybe 4 yrs of meds and more years of residency are a waste of time and that i should just move on with my life instead of repeating the year. a big reason for this is that niether me nor my advisors, the dean, counsellors, nobody can figure out why i failed. i went to class, i did my work i studied. i am not saying i should have gotten perfect but i should have at least passed. out of almost 100 students i am the only one who has to repeat and i just dont get it. i even got a psych assessment done. my iq is really high and i dont have any learning disabilities. i dont see what i could possibly do differently next year. i dont know why i failed or how to fix it. i keep fantasizing every day about other career paths outside of medicine and i just realised how unhappy i was this year.

im not even sure why i am posting beyond needing to write this down but i guess any feedback would be nice. what do u all think

My impression is that if you repeat the year, you will pass. You know what is coming, and you have an advantage now (not an advantage you wanted, but it's there -- you have traveled this road). Just try not to make the same errors. Obviously you don't do as well on exams as your friends do. If possible, see if your school could help you find a tutor (a student you would pay to help you better prepare for exams). I know that this must be incredibly difficult, but that's life. Sometimes you face a challenge. By all accounts, you have what it takes and it will come together. However, this is just my impression, nothing more.

 

[Hayden2102]

Maybe the universe is trying to tell you something?

 

[palmpalm]

Maybe the universe is trying to tell you something?

yah, that's what I keep thinking.

 

[palmpalm]

My impression is that if you repeat the year, you will pass. You know what is coming, and you have an advantage now (not an advantage you wanted, but it's there -- you have traveled this road). Just try not to make the same errors. Obviously you don't do as well on exams as your friends do. If possible, see if your school could help you find a tutor (a student you would pay to help you better prepare for exams). I know that this must be incredibly difficult, but that's life. Sometimes you face a challenge. By all accounts, you have what it takes and it will come together. However, this is just my impression, nothing more.

Thanks for the motivating post I think I will try again and I hope that my heart will be into it. Only time will tell.

 

[bcat85]

I know this may seem juvenile, but my college offered "study skills" seminars for underclassmen where they went over different study techniques. I don't know if this is the answer, but it may be worth a shot. Maybe you haven't found the strategy that is right for you.

 

[WhyMD]

ive been thinking a a lately and i am confused and dont know what to do. I know that i would enjoy being a physician and i will make a good physician. but i am beginning to feel that maybe 4 yrs of meds and more years of residency are a waste of time and that i should just move on with my life instead of repeating the year..... i dont see what i could possibly do differently next year. i dont know why i failed or how to fix it. i keep fantasizing every day about other career paths outside of medicine and i just realised how unhappy i was this year.

Let me remind you of few things that may help you to get a clearer vision.

- Just because you are capable of entering med school, you are not obligated to finish it. Many capable people choose not to enter into medicine or simply change career midway for many various reasons.

- Your "high IQ" has very little to do with your performance in med school which is primarily memorization. There is reason why physics majors and engineers have very difficult time in med schools.

- When you are in a wrong place but are sincere, sometimes Life sends you signs to inform you.

- Do not go into medicine for prestige. You will be very miserable. Donald Trump, although a charlatan, reflects the prevailing sentiments of common folks when he calls physicians as "money-grabbing dogs" in his book.

- You can see yourself being happy working as a physician. This means you can see yourself being happy doing something else as well. You don't seem to have a diehard reason to be a physician. It will become harder to motivate yourself as you invest more time and money into this field.

- You say money is not an issue for you. That's good because not small number of med students, residents and physicians are staying in the field pressured by the shadow of their debts. You are more free.

- You are very intelligent. You can succeed well in many fields including medicine. Do not let the failed exams discourage you.

- Take this time to investigate what's really happening and will happen in medicine: working conditions, reimbursements, job satisfactions, quality of personal life, etc. Then ask yourself "Is it really worth the trouble?" If the answer is still 'yes!" you know what to do.

- No one cares whether you return to med school or not. Everyone is busy trying to fulfill his own desires. Only you care what you do and how you live. You know what makes you happy and fulfilled and what it is that you want in life. Only you are responsible for obtaining it. Think how you would feel coming home after work on Fri evening sitting in the livingroom by yourself for a moment there. Will you feel satisfied?

It will be good for the nation to have satisfied physicians who enjoy their jobs.

 

[palmpalm]

Let me remind you of few things that may help you to get a clearer vision.

- Just because you are capable of entering med school, you are not obligated to finish it. Many capable people choose not to enter into medicine or simply change career midway for many various reasons.

- Your "high IQ" has very little to do with your performance in med school which is primarily memorization. There is reason why physics majors and engineers have very difficult time in med schools.

- When you are in a wrong place but are sincere, sometimes Life sends you signs to inform you.

- Do not go into medicine for prestige. You will be very miserable. Donald Trump, although a charlatan, reflects the prevailing sentiments of common folks when he calls physicians as "money-grabbing dogs" in his book.

- You can see yourself being happy working as a physician. This means you can see yourself being happy doing something else as well. You don't seem to have a diehard reason to be a physician. It will become harder to motivate yourself as you invest more time and money into this field.

- You say money is not an issue for you. That's good because not small number of med students, residents and physicians are staying in the field pressured by the shadow of their debts. You are more free.

- You are very intelligent. You can succeed well in many fields including medicine. Do not let the failed exams discourage you.

- Take this time to investigate what's really happening and will happen in medicine: working conditions, reimbursements, job satisfactions, quality of personal life, etc. Then ask yourself "Is it really worth the trouble?" If the answer is still 'yes!" you know what to do.

- No one cares whether you return to med school or not. Everyone is busy trying to fulfill his own desires. Only you care what you do and how you live. You know what makes you happy and fulfilled and what it is that you want in life. Only you are responsible for obtaining it. Think how you would feel coming home after work on Fri evening sitting in the livingroom by yourself for a moment there. Will you feel satisfied?

It will be good for the nation to have satisfied physicians who enjoy their jobs.

Wow. Thanks for such a great post. You've actually helped me to think more clearly!

 

[docmode]

As I see it, you just don't have that burning desire to do a little more maybe because you just don't want to be a doctor that badly. It's such a long painful road and I bet you have many interests and talents that could lead to a happy life. I think since you've been out of the rigor for a bit it's tough jumping back into the fire especially since you lack the adrenaline now to avoid the flames. I would suggest going in another direction that you're interested in. You're smart enough and probably young enough that if and when you figure out you goofed and really want to be in medicine you could go back. Until you have that absolute certainty i doubt if you'll do any more to be successful. You're body is trying to tell you to run! The good news is that you can change course in the future I'm sure and be quite successful. Good luck, but I think you'll be fine.

 

[osli]

Physicists and engineers struggle in med school? Wow, that's one I've never heard before. They all seem to be at the top of the class at my school.

To the OP, best of luck. I think you've gotten some good advice from professionals in the past and from people you don't know in this thread. I have the feeling that somewhere inside you know what it is that you really want to do. If it is to be a physician, next year won't be a problem for you. If it is to be something else, go pursue that with passion.

 

[Mr hawkings]

I think you've gotten some good advice from professionals in the past and from people you don't know in this thread. I have the feeling that somewhere inside you know what it is that you really want to do. If it is to be a physician, next year won't be a problem for you. If it is to be something else, go pursue that with passion.

Well-Said